


Chlorine

by matty_macgregor



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alpha James, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alphas have male parts, Anxiety, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Omega Keith (Voltron), Omega Verse, Omegas have female parts, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Miscarriage, Pining, Post Season 8, Rating May Change, Self-Esteem Issues, Undercover Missions, afab language, bad breakup, body image issues, not a fix-it fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-07-01
Packaged: 2019-11-15 05:53:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 106,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18067811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matty_macgregor/pseuds/matty_macgregor
Summary: “What?!” he snarled. “What do you mean it’s been radio silence?! You’ve lost contact with Shiro for a whole month?!”Iverson didn’t bat an eye. Keith loomed over his desk, teeth bared in an angry grimace. As he leaned forward, James saw under his jacket a sheath for a dagger slung into the back of his belt. Although his hand never twitched in that direction, James tensed, ready to intervene.-In which James and Keith have to go undercover to save Captain Takashi Shirogane after his mysterious disappearance. And they have to pretend to be a couple.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! Thanks for giving this story a try! I really hope you're going to like it! The story updates on Sundays.
> 
> Please, keep in mind while reading that nobody proofread this and that English is not my first language.
> 
> Enjoy!

_I despise you sometimes_  
_I love to hate the fight and_  
_you in my life is like_  
_Sippin' on straight chlorine_

 

* * *

 

 

James had thought he’d gotten over his crush for Keith. Well, more infatuation than crush, really. No, not even infatuation—it had solely been admiration. Now that he was grown up and mature, James could admit that Keith had been worthy of admiration—he’d been the best recruit of their cohort, on track to becoming the best pilot of their generation.

James had also thought he’d kept his crush/infatuation/admiration a secret.

He was getting disabused of his illusions pretty fast today.

He was busy fiddling with a twisted wire under his jet fuselage’s when Ryan appeared at his elbow. And it truly felt as if the guy had just appeared because one moment he wasn’t there and the second he’d materialised.

James opened his mouth to scold him playfully. He noticed the odd expression on his friend’s face. Ryan was a level-headed guy. Nothing impressed him. During the Galra invasion of Earth, he’d taken it all in stride, like an alien invasion was something that happened every day. Whenever he felt close to freaking out, James would look at his impassive face and calm down.

Except that now Ryan was sporting an expression that could only be called _strained_. James had no idea what to do—he couldn’t ever recall this happening in the past. Surely it couldn’t be the Galra—they’d been defeated almost five years ago. The universe was, if not at peace, at least pacified enough to be considered safe. Furthermore, thanks to the new defense and surveillance system put together by the Holt family, nothing bigger than a fly could slip into their solar system undetected. If an alien threat had been spied, James would know. If extraterrestrial beings didn’t faze Ryan, what did?

“Come with me,” Ryan said, voice tight.

And he grabbed James’ arm. The shock of the physical touch confused James even further. They didn’t do that, touching each other much, especially not this casually. Sure, they were friends, but James was also Ryan’s superior. You didn’t touch your commanding officer that way.

“What’s going on?” James asked, totally puzzled.

“Let’s get you out of that hangar.”

Ryan probably would have dragged him bodily if James hadn’t followed numbly. He was too stunned to do much else. Years on the battlefield had honed his senses enough for him to know that there was no actual danger, that Ryan wasn't pulling him out of harm’s way. Out of habit, he scanned the hangar nonetheless, looking for any trace of imminent peril. There was nothing—everybody else was going on about their business. The jets and other Garrison crafts were all in their berth. Although there were hundreds of them, James knew them all by sight. Nothing was out of place as far as he could see.

He pointed this out to Ryan, getting slightly amused by the situation now that he knew there was no danger anywhere. Despite this, the pull on his arm didn’t relent. If anything, it tightened a fraction—his friend wanted him to hurry his step. James caught the distant sound of excited chatter without paying it any mind. Had Nadia gotten herself into trouble again and she needed James to intervene on her behalf? Or maybe James needed to rescue some hapless intergalactic ambassador being bored to tears by Ina and her overly-analytical mind (this had happened more times than he cared to count). James loved his team, but they could be a handful at times.

They had nearly reached of the many pedestrian doors that lead out of the hangar when James saw it out the corner of his eye: a cluster of people. He wouldn’t have paid it any mind if he hadn’t heard Ryan swear under his breath while looking in that direction. Ryan never swore so, logically, James felt compelled to look to see what had upset his friend.

A small crowd had gathered around something or someone. Orange and grey uniforms mingled together excitedly alongside various aliens. The short ones were standing on their tiptoe to get a glance at whatever was the centre of the attraction. The last time this had happened had been after a lost puppy had wandered into the hangar. That day, humans had learned that not every race of aliens appreciated animals—there had nearly been a fight between a human and a young pilot from planet Dosie Y39 who’d confused the dog for a _thullurn_ , which was apparently common food where he came from.

Ryan hadn’t been impressed by that incident, which meant this had to be a tad more serious than a lost puppy.

The crowd parted for a half a second, and that half second was all it took to shake James’ world. He stopped dead in his tracks, forcing Ryan to stop too if he didn’t want to dislocate his shoulder by his incessant pulling. That quiet swear under his breath came again.

James was too stunned to care because standing there amidst the adoring group like he hadn’t disappeared five years ago stood Keith Kogane. James couldn’t move, could only stare in bewilderment, trying to make sense of what he was seeing. Logically, he’d known that Keith’s silence hadn’t meant he’d died. No doubt his fellow Paladins had been aware of his whereabouts, unlike James. To him, Keith had merely dropped off the surface of the Earth. James had last seen him five years ago after the Atlas had touched ground. Their triumphant comeback after saving the universe had been slightly spoiled for James because of that disappearance. He’d been high on victory and drunk on being alive, so much that he’d put it in his head to celebrate with Keith, only to be told he’d already left with the remaining members of the Blade of Marmora.

And now, here he was, rightfully being hailed as a hero. James’ heart did weird things in his chest at the mere sight of the Black Paladin. Ryan had given up on trying to pull him away—James understood in a flash that his friend had been wanting to spare him this painful reunion. Painful on his part because Keith surely wouldn’t give a damn about him, certainly hadn’t thought about him for all his years away from Earth.

Before he knew what he was doing, James was walking towards the group, Ryan on his heels. He didn’t want to talk, he wanted another glance of his crush that wouldn’t be hindered by the noisy crowd. He needed a tiny whiff of that omega scent he’d been pining after.

He got more than he bargained for. A few people recognized him for an officer and moved aside to let him pass, enough that he soon found himself nearly at the front, able to feast his eyes on Keith to his heart’s content.

Keith had changed in five years. His inky black hair was much longer, pulled back in a long, silky ponytail. There was a new maturity to his purple eyes, a new calmness to his demeanour that made him feel like a totally different person. He obviously didn’t enjoy being the centre of the attention, but he was smiling at the people talking to him nonetheless, answering questions about his whereabouts. He was wearing the Blade uniform, a tight bodysuit that clung to his curves in a way that should be illegal. James had seen it before, once, and he’d had dreams about it for days afterwards.

He thought about stepping back into the crowd to avoid detection. He didn’t want Keith to notice him staring.

He was taking a subtle step back when Keith happened to look in his direction. Their eyes met. James froze on the spot as if turned to stone. Keith’s looks towards him used to be cold, fueled by hate. They’d mended their ways five years ago during the invasion, so now, Keith merely nodded politely at him in a disinterested way. James nodded stiffly back.

Keith had apparently not come on his own; two more members of the Blade arrived. They were two women, one of them the one who’d held a gun to Keith’s head during the war. Zethrid, James thought, stomach curdling with distaste. He’d never forget that moment of utter panic when he’d seen Keith clutched in her big paws about to get his head blown up. He’d wanted to save him, damn it. In the end, Veronica had taken the lucky shot. He was forever thankful to her.

“Boss!” Zethrid was saying. “Your offspring won’t stop pulling at my ears!”

James had no idea what she was saying until he spotted the small child sitting atop her shoulders. The toddler, no more than three years old, was pulling at her ears like they were the reins of a horse. Keith smiled at the picture, a genuine pull upwards of his lips. Zethrid plucked the child off her shoulders and handed it to him.

“Dada,” the toddler babbled, arms extending towards Keith.

James felt as if the floor had opened beneath his feet.

He turned away and left the small cooing crowd. His heart hammered in his chest and his face was hot. Dimly, he noted Ryan following him, his concerned oozing in the air around them. James didn’t want to talk, didn’t want pity; he needed to be alone for a moment to digest all of that.

Blindly, he managed to make his way to his room. As soon as the door slid shut behind him, he leaned against it heavily. He was breathing hard. Had he run all the way from the hangar to here? Perhaps, he couldn’t remember.

His thoughts whirled. It was too much to process. Had he seen right? Had his eyes deceived him? Had that child really extended its arms towards Keith, calling him _dada_? Dad.

James shook his head—no, no, he was reading way too much into this. The child was surely Zethrid’s, not Keith’s. And yet it had looked entirely too human to have some Galra blood. James had glanced it for no more than a couple of seconds, yet he’d already taken in its black hair, chubby pink cheeks, dark eyes, cute little Blade uniform.

No, there hadn’t been much Galra blood in that child. It couldn’t be Zethrid’s.

He groaned, unable to admit the obvious. The kid was Keith’s. Keith had a kid. How was that even possible?

Except James knew how it was possible: Keith was strong and capable and appreciated and beautiful. He was a respected member of the Voltron Coalition. He was the leader of the Blade of Marmora. What alpha wouldn’t want to father a child on someone like that? James couldn’t be the only one to have noticed him.

The thought of another alpha laying claim on Keith made his blood boil with impotent jealousy. Someone was always beating him to the punch. Someone was always there first, leaving James in the dust to contemplate how he’d always be second. Hell, he’d even been second to Keith himself back during their cadet years.

He sighed.

Suddenly, he appreciated very much Ryan’s attempts at getting him away from the hangar. His day was ruined—his whole week was ruined by this. He wished he’d known before having to face the result. Who would have told him, though?  Of Keith’s comrades, only Pidge Holt, Hunk Garret, and Captain Shirogane had remained at the Garrison. None of them were on more than nodding terms with James; why would they have thought to inform him that Keith had had a child? It wasn’t of his business to start with. They couldn’t have known he’d want this information.

And did he want that information to start with? It hurt, having the confirmation that Keith had found himself someone, someone that wasn’t James. Who was the lucky bloke? A human, James assumed. He could be wrong—he’d only glimpsed the child. It could have four arms for all he knew.

Groaning, he ran his hands through his hair. He had to get over this. He couldn’t let this get him down. He hoped Keith wouldn’t stay at the Garrison for too long, that their paths wouldn’t cross. Why was Keith here in the first place after having been absent for almost five years? Was it to see his friends? Captain Shirogane wasn’t even here at the moment.

Instead of going back to the hangar, James decided to work on the new training sim he’d come up for the recruits. He’d based it on what he’d witnessed of space, which was admittedly much more than he had ever expected. Since the Atlas had been grounded however, his visits to outer space had been rarer. The MFE jets weren’t made to launch themselves out of the atmosphere—they had to be taken there. Furthermore, they still hadn’t been able to fix the battery autonomy problems. They couldn’t stray too far from Earth or from a mothership if they didn’t want to run out of power and end up being stranded in space. Although the Holt family was working hard on that problem, it wasn’t one of their top priorities. The MFE jets were redundant when not at war, so the Garrison preferred to direct the Holt genius towards more immediate problems.

It meant James and his team hadn’t flown for real for more than a year. They trained the new recruits and that was it. Admittedly, they had a lot of recruits every year. Although it was a fine enough job, this wasn’t what James wanted to do. This wasn’t why he’d joined the Garrison in the first place. He wanted to fly, to go out there, to see by himself what others described to him. Hell, he was getting desperate enough that he’d considered asking Commander Iverson to be made a cargo pilot. It would be a step down from his current status, but damn it, piloting cargo ships to the farthest reaches of the universe was better than sitting on his hands here on Earth.

He didn’t understand how Captain Shirogane had given it all up. James remembered him from his youth; the golden boy of the Garrison, the best pilot ever, the man who’d take humanity to the confines of space. James had looked up to him, had nearly fainted when the captain had actually _talked_ to him at school. He hadn’t been that surprised that Shirogane had come back after supposedly dying during the Kerberos mission, and it had seemed only natural that he’d be a Paladin of Voltron, ready to defend the universe. He’d saved Earth, the universe, _multiple realities_. And then he’d retired. He’d given it all up for a cozy desk job. Everybody had been taken aback by his decision except those who knew him best. Since James wasn’t part of Shirogane’s inner circle, he didn’t understand. No reason seemed good enough to give up space.

Keith hadn’t given it up. Hell, even dumb Lance Álvarez hadn’t given it up, electing to live on New Altea rather than on Earth. James envied them both so much he tasted it at the back of his mouth. If someone had told him he’d one day envy Lance Álvarez, he’d have punched them.

A knock resounded at his door at around eight hundred hours. Too absorbed in his work on his tablet, he hadn’t seen the time fly by. Ryan, Nadia, and Ina were waiting for him expectantly in the corridor, all sporting the same kind of half-hidden worried expressions. Ryan had told the others about what had happened in the hangar apparently. James couldn’t quite work up the energy to be annoyed—these two women were perceptive, they’d have figured it out eventually. It wasn’t as if they weren’t aware of his _crush_ to start with. The second they learned that Keith and his crew had landed, they’d have guessed it wouldn’t leave James unaffected.

He scowled at them for good measure and, together, they made their way towards the mess hall. It had become a tradition they did their best to uphold over the past years. They all had their own occupations: James taught new recruits, Nadia worked with the rest of the tekkies to take care of the Garrison vehicles, Ina had easily picked up many alien languages so she worked with the communication crew, and Ryan oversaw the civilian consultants. When their schedules coincided, they grabbed at least one meal a day together. James didn’t know if they were friends or merely old companions who’d survived a war together. He liked the first option best.

Since the four of them were officers now, they didn’t have to vie for a seat in the cafeteria. Officers had many lounges at their disposition, which meant they could usually eat in relative peace. And the food was of better quality than what was served to the rankers. James grabbed his supper tray while he listened to Ina quietly commenting on the new language she was learning. The sound that came out of her mouth as she demonstrated made absolutely no sense. Nadia smartly remarked this was how dinosaurs sounded in her mind.

Ryan claimed the seat beside James at the table, and James knew his friend would ask about what had happened that morning. He didn’t want to think about it and he wanted even less to talk about it. He knew he was pathetic, why confirm it by saying it out loud? He focused all of his attention on his food, hoping Ryan would get the hint.

He kept quiet for such a long moment that James started believing he’d get away without a lecture. Ryan always thought things through before speaking, which was why everybody listened to him when he did. Knowing him, he was mulling his speech, trying to come up with the perfect combination of words to make James understand that he was stupid for pining. He’d do so in such a polite, respectful way that it would take hours for James to realise he’d indeed been called an idiot.

A few fellow officers came and went, most of them on their own or in pairs. It was a busy time of the year, there was little time to sit down to actually enjoy a meal. Out of habit, James looked at them out the corner of his eye. Whenever he saw purplish skin or fur, his heart always leapt in discomfort. It had been five years, and he still couldn’t quite get that the Galras were their allies now. He knew he wasn’t the only one in that position; Commander Iverson had often chided his people for making the Galras feel unwelcome. The reaction was deep-rooted in James, however. He could never be quite at ease with a Galra in the room. He hoped it didn’t show too much; he did have a few Galra rookies under his command. It was important for him to appear professional despite his misgivings.

A lecture from Ryan would have been preferable to what happened next. The double doors slid open to admit a small group chatting loudly. James glanced up disinterestedly to see the two Holt siblings walking in, followed by the guy who used to be the Yellow Paladin, Hunk Garret.

And Keith was with them. With the kid.

James dropped his glass of water. It slid from his nerveless fingers to land with a clatter on his tray, upsetting it all. He caught the tray before it crashed to the ground, water spilling over his thankfully eaten supper. Face burning, heart hammering, he cleared his throat. His friends were looking at him knowingly. Nobody from the Voltron crew tried to investigate the racket, mercifully. They sat at the table furthest, the youngest Holt yammering about something apparently exciting, hands flying.

James didn’t care for her. He had eyes only for Keith who was sitting down and picking up the kid to pluck it on his knee. The gesture was smooth, easy, a sure sign it had become a habit. The kid babbled on, trying to grab at a forgotten piece of paper on the table. The young age and the distance made it impossible for James to know whether it was a girl or a boy.

The Garrison strongly suggested that its soldiers use scent blockers at all time to avoid unpleasantness. Betas were also encouraged to join in large numbers to provide padding. James didn’t know the rules amongst the Blade of Marmora organization about scent, yet he’d say they probably had no idea what scent blockers were. Keith _reeked_ even from across the room. The three alphas present, James included, all sat up at attention. Keith didn’t seem to care at all that two men and a woman were staring at him. And why should he? He was perfectly safe with his pack close around him. Keith could personally tear them limb from limb anyway.

Nadia suggested they go. James barely heard her—he waved at her absent-mindedly, his eyes still fixed on the other table. Hunk had brought a tray for Keith that he set down with a flourish. The food on it was clearly not cafeteria-made—most likely it was something he’d cooked himself. He looked on with expectation in his eyes. Keith took a bite from his meal. He nodded and Hunk looked as if he’d been crowned king of the Earth. He sat back down beside his friend, talking excitedly while the two Holt siblings listened in amusement. For each bite Keith took, he gave one to the child on his knee. James observed him feed the kid with the distracted ease of a practiced parent.

Yearning boiled in his stomach in a thick miasma that made him want to puke. He got to his feet briskly, startling his friends. He put the tray away, snarled at one of the alphas looking at Keith too closely, and left the lounge with his heart in his throat.

He’d almost reached his room when his phone vibrated in his pant pocket. He pulled it out to see, with horror, that Commander Iverson was requesting his presence at his at his earliest convenience.

With Iverson, earliest convenience meant _yesterday_.

Shit, what could be the matter? James very rarely dealt with the commander himself. The last time he’d actually talked to the man had to have been six months ago while the commander had greeted the newly arrived recruits.

He hurried across the Garrison, walking at a fast pace because officers just don’t run down the corridors. Orange-wearing cadets stopped what they were doing to salute and fellow officers merely nodded in acknowledgement. Through one of the large windows, James saw a big alien craft slowly pulling away from the hangar. In the blink of an eye it would be at the other end of the galaxy on its way to some far away planet. James envied its crew.

He reached the commander’s office in a timely manner. An orderly typing on a computer barely glanced at him before waving him in. James took a breath, smoothed down his hair and the front of his uniform, and walked in.

Keith was already there.

James’ eyes widened. He stopped on the threshold, nose twitching at the smell that filled the office. Keith frowned at him while Iverson opened his mouth to ask him what the hell his problem was.

He walked further in until he was standing at attention beside Keith. It was weird, seeing him wearing civilian clothes rather than his Blade or Garrison uniform. Weird and distracting. At least the kid wasn’t with him.

Iverson sat behind his desk, hands linked. He observed the both of them. The scowl permanently etched on his face made him appear angry, a good façade that hid what was truly going on in his mind. James kept his eyes firmly an inch above the commander’s head, spine straight, hands behind his back. For some reason, he felt like a cadet about to be chided.

It didn’t help that Keith and he had found themselves in a similar situation once in the past. To this day, James remembered the strength behind the punch that had floored him easily. Shame still burned bright in his mind whenever he recalled that moment; shame at the mean words that had angered Keith as well as shame at how utterly defenseless he’d been in front of Keith’s rage.

“So,” Iverson barked. “Thanks for attending quickly. Kogane, thank you for taking leave of the Blade of Marmora to be here.”

“I still don’t know why I’m here,” Keith commented in annoyance.

James winced at the impertinent tone. Iverson grunted without remonstrating.

“Yes. I’ve been busy all day. Now that you’re both here, let’s get down to business. What I am about to tell you cannot leave this room, understood?” They both nodded. “I have a mission for you.”

“What? I don’t work for you anymore!” Keith barked, insulted.

Iverson glared at him. “Do you think I enjoy having to ask for your help, Kogane? No, I don’t. Stop your yapping and listen. I asked for you specifically because I knew you’d want in.” He paused. “The mission concerns Captain Shirogane.”

At once, James saw Keith stiffen. James couldn’t help being intrigued; what was going on? He’d heard that Captain Shirogane had gone off planet with his fiancé for some reason.

Iverson typed on his computer and the picture of a planet appeared on the holoscreen affixed to the wall. They both observed it with interest. The layout of the planet didn’t feel familiar. There seemed to be little solid ground and a huge amount of water, similar to Earth. The holoscreen didn’t translate colours very well, but James thought what passed for water looked to be _pink_.

“Captain Shirogane left for Planet Mizipra a month ago. It’s been radio silence since then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is part of the LLF Comment Project, which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! Thank you so much to those who left nice comments on the first chapter! I'm so very happy you like the story so far! Here is chapter two, which gets the setting in place.
> 
> By the way, since Curtis doesn't have a last name, I've decided to call him Curtis Miller. He will therefore be referred to as Lieutenant Miller in this chapter. I hope it won't cause any confusion!

Silence engulfed the small office at the news. Captain Shirogane had left one month ago and hadn’t been heard of since then. Commander Iverson remained quiet, allowing them—well, allowing Keith—to digest this. James still wasn’t sure what to make of this, wasn’t sure why he had to be told. Shouldn’t Iverson be talking to the former Paladins, who’d been brothers-in-arms with Shirogane?

Distressed filled Keith’s scent quickly, leaving James reeling. He had to combat all his instincts to reach out, to sooth, to comfort. Against his best judgement he looked at Keith who’d gone pale. His lips were pressed in a bloodless line and his eyes were huge and angry. A vein jumped in his jaw. His hands turned into fists at his sides.

“What?!” he snarled. “What do you mean it’s been radio silence?! You’ve lost contact with Shiro for a whole _month_?!”

Iverson didn’t bat an eye. Keith loomed over his desk, teeth bared in an angry grimace. As he leaned forward, James saw under his jacket a sheath for a dagger slung into the back of his belt. Although his hand never twitched in that direction, James tensed, ready to intervene.

The two of them remained locked in a staring contest until Keith got a grip on himself with apparent difficulty. Taking a deep breath, he stepped back.

“Tell me,” he ordered.

He was no alpha, he couldn’t make people obey him with his voice. The trace of command in his tone nonetheless sent a ripple of unease down James’ back. He was the leader of the Blade of Marmora, James shouldn’t forget that.

Iverson clearly didn’t appreciate being given orders. Keith and he entered another staring contest, giving James time to contemplate the situation. Keith was the leader of the Blade of Marmora. The Blade didn’t seem to be a military organization, at least not in the sense the Garrison had become. Logically, this meant that Keith was James’ superior since James was merely a lieutenant. Did that make him Iverson’s equal?

Pride raised its ugly head in James’ guts. He tried stamping it down. He used to be such a damn proud, arrogant cadet. He hadn’t made himself one friend by looking down his nose at others. The only reason people had clung to him was because he’d been a bully. Other bullies had gravitated towards him. They'd united in their beliefs that they’d been the best, that it had been their right to shit on fellow students for the silliest reasons.

There were days James still thought he was better than anyone else. Part of it was alpha pride, he knew. He’d been raised to believe that being an alpha made him better than everybody else. It had taken him a long, long time to accept that betas and even omegas could be good too.

Nevertheless, a tiny part of himself chafed at the thought that Keith, a mere omega, could be in charge of a large organization. His instincts told him that Keith should be put to his place, that he shouldn’t be raising his voice or talking back to a superior officer, to an alpha.

James swallowed. He had to be through with that way of thinking. Keith had proven on numerous occasions that he was a worthy leader. James had seen it with his own eyes. People wouldn’t follow him so readily otherwise.

“Right,” Iverson grumbled. “Both of you, what do you know of Planet Mizipra?”

Keith shrugged, and James said quickly: “Planet Mizipra is situated in quadrant X-40 of the Vistorix system. It has an atmosphere similar to that of Earth. Its inhabitants are on friendly terms with humans. Although not technologically as advanced as the Galras or the Alteans, they’ve proven easy to adapt and willing to learn. They’ve accepted to transform half of their planet into arable land for the Voltron Coalition. To this day, it’s providing a tenth of the food that’s then sent to terraforming planets and misplaced inhabitants. They—”

“The Vistorix system isn’t hostile, why was Shiro sent there?” Keith cut.

James glared, insulted to have been cut off mid-sentence.

“On vacation.”

Keith opened his mouth. Closed it. His eyes widened. James hadn’t expected that answer; he didn’t think he’d ever heard of the captain taking days off. He was always at the Garrison, working or helping or simply being present in some capacity. It was as if he couldn’t bear the thought of being away.

A corner of Iverson’s mouth twitched in amusement at their surprise. “The captain chose to visit Mizipra of his own volition. Because of the friendly nature of the Miziprans and their planet’s similarities to Earth, it has become a popular getaway for couples.” He typed on his computer, and a few pretty pictures of what had to be Mizipra appeared on the holoscreen. “The Miziprans are very proud of their planet and their culture. They guard it all very fiercely. Since they share, on principle, the same type of secondary genders as us, only couples are allowed on their planet to avoid any unpleasantness.”

The landscapes appearing on the screen indeed looked paradisiacal: lush vegetation, long beaches, large bodies of water, colourful skies. Although the colours were different from those from Earth (blue leaves and pink waters and green sand), there nonetheless was a sense of peace oozing from the pictures. James could almost hear the sound of waves crashing against the beach and smell the heady scents of blossoming flowers. There was a distinctive romantic feeling to it all. It made sense that couples would seek out that kind of place.

There was an annoyed twist to Keith’s lips as he glanced at the pictures. His smell shifted towards bitterness. He said nothing, electing to cross his arms over his chest.

James wondered if this meant he still pined for Captain Shirogane and hated the thought of him being on this beautiful planet with his fiancé. This wouldn’t surprise him; Keith was tenacious. Not unlike a lovesick puppy, he’d always been at Shirogane’s heels, face upturned to him, eager to please. It used to sicken James to see him panting after the older man so overtly, especially back when Shirogane had been in a relationship with Lieutenant Wagner. During the Galra invasion, Keith had still been Shirogane’s faithful shadow, though he’d begun making himself scarce after Shirogane started seeing Lieutenant Miller.

Surely the pining had to be over with, hadn’t it? Keith had a child, he should have shifted his attentions from Shirogane to the man who’d bred him. Judging by his scent, they weren’t bonded, but it didn’t mean much in itself.

“If he’s away on vacations,” Keith said, voice tight, “why hasn’t he communicated with you, then?”

“That’s the thing, Kogane, I don’t know. That’s what I want you to figure out.”

“Me? I don’t know! I haven’t heard from Shiro in years!”

This time, James couldn’t stop himself from staring at Keith in surprise. Keith suddenly looked like a deer caught in headlights, cringing from both James’ and Iverson’s questioning gaze. For a moment, he huddled further into his jacket, the arms crossed over his chest giving the impression he was hugging himself. He looked distressed, enough that James itched to intervene. He kept quiet, battling his own instincts—he wished he was good at keeping his cool the way Iverson was. The commander was an unmated alpha, surely he too had the urge to comfort one omega in distress. He didn’t bat an eye however, content to wait in silence until Keith gathered himself.

“I don’t want guesswork,” Iverson continued. “I want certainties. I want you to go to Mizipra and find Captain Shirogane.”

“But you said only couples…” Keith trailed off. He exchanged a bewildered look with James. “No!” he barked, all anguish vanished. “No way!”

“Sir, you cannot be serious,” James added, forgetting protocol in the face of the horror dawning on him. “I have to protest!”

Iverson leaned back in his chair, regarding them while they spluttered with indignation.

James’ thoughts whirled. This was ridiculous—Commander Iverson surely couldn’t be implying Keith and he go to Planet Mizipra by pretending to be a couple? What kind of bad cover was that? This would never work. They’d never be able to pretend. They’d be at each other’s throat in an hour. Nobody would be fooled, not even aliens who didn’t know them.

Heat pooled in his chest nonetheless. He allowed himself a second to imagine how it would be while Keith shouted at the commander. Pretending to be Keith’s mate would never be the true thing, but it would certainly be the closest James would ever get. They’d have to hold hands in public and stand close and perhaps even kiss a few times to be convincing. They’d share a room with only one bed because why would a couple need two rooms or two separate beds? It would be a chance to get to know Keith better, perhaps even to put the past behind. At least it would be a chance to be _close_.

He shook his head. Keith’s protests were dying down in front of Iverson’s uncaring silence.

“Why Griffin?” Keith demanded. “Let me go with Lance instead.”

“ _Álvarez_?” James couldn’t stop himself from spatting in disgust. “And it’s Lieutenant Griffin, Kogane.”

The glare Keith directed at him could only be described as murderous. “Yeah, Lance. I trust him with my life, _lieutenant_.”

“I contacted Álvarez and he said he didn’t have time to help,” Iverson interrupted. “Something happened on New Altea that he needs to deal with. To answer your question, Kogane, I chose Lieutenant Griffin because he is perfectly suited for this mission. Give me some credit, I thought this through prior to calling you back.”

“Perfectly suited?!”

“Yes. He is smart and cunning. He can keep calm in any situation. He is cool-headed, hard-working, and he follows the rules. You know I cannot unleash you on your own, Kogane. You might have calmed down from your cadet days, but I’m afraid you’ll be reckless since this concerns Captain Shirogane.”

“You want Griffin to keep me on a leash,” Keith spat, disgusted. “It’s convenient Lance is busy; he’d have given me free rein.”

“That’s not it, Kogane,” Iverson retorted. “During the Galra invasion, you’ve proven many times that you are trustworthy. You are responsible and strong, but you don’t follow protocol. We are not fighting a war here, we are talking about a possible infiltration mission amongst a people that is supposed to be our ally.”

“I did plenty of infiltration missions as a member of the Blade of Marmora.”

“I know, but it’s not the same. The Blades are required to sneak, to be stealthy, to lurk in the shadows. This is not what you are going to be doing on Mizipra. You are going to be out in broad daylight, exposed. Tell me honestly, would you be able to look someone in the face knowing they might have hurt Captain Shirogane and not do anything about it?”

Keith pressed his lips into a bloodless line. Saying yes would be a lie, they all knew it. He excelled at many things—deception not being one of those.

“Exactly,” Iverson concluded with a nod. “This is why I chose Lieutenant Griffin to accompany you. Together, you two are a force to be reckoned with. I can trust Griffin to follow protocol while I know you’ll stop at nothing to find out what happened. It isn’t ideal that you must pretend to be a couple, but we need to work with what we have.”

For a moment, Keith appeared near arguing. His body quivered with barely-suppressed impotence in the face of Iverson’s solid arguments. Then, his shoulders slumped.

“Very well,” he sighed. “You make sense, damn you.”

Iverson bared his teeth in a mockery of a smile. “I know. You are scheduled to leave for Mizipra in three days. Tomorrow at noon, I want to see both of you here with a mission plan. You’ve been sent what information we have on the captain’s whereabouts alongside a schedule of what he’d planned to do. Based on this, you will come up with an itinerary and a day-to-day breakdown of what you intend to do. I need a precise timetable. Everything is to be done by the book. Furthermore, this mission is confidential. You are not allowed to discuss it with others or within hearing of others. Until we know for certain that Captain Shirogane’s disappearance has nothing to do with foul play, we don’t want anyone knowing what we are planning. Is that understood?”

James and Keith nodded in unison.

“Commander,” Keith began, looking at his phone where everything they’d need had already been uploaded, “why is there three reservations?”

“For you son.”

Keith spluttered. “I can’t take Sven into enemy territory!”

“We don’t know for sure that you are heading into enemy territory. The Miziprans are peaceful by nature. There are sections in touristic areas that only families with children can access.”

“Shiro doesn’t have children, he wouldn’t be there.”

Iverson shrugged. “Are you willing to take the risk?”

Keith gritted his teeth. “Basically, you’re asking me to choose between Shiro and the welfare of my son.”

Iverson said nothing, his one good eye boring into Keith. His silence felt like a hand pressing down on both of them. James had to resist the urge to bow his head. He stiffened his spine, observing Keith out the corner of his eye. He looked ready to jump over Iverson’s desk to deck him.

“Very well. I have one condition however: I want Zethrid and Ezor to accompany us. They’re a couple, it’ll be fine. If the Miziprans suspect we are looking for Shiro, they might be less wary of Galrans than of humans, since Shiro’s a human too.”

Iverson contemplated this before nodding. “Agreed. You will leave on different ships and stay at different hotels, however. For this to work, you’ll have to pretend not to know each other. Do you have any questions? You’ve been awfully silent, Lieutenant Griffin. Do you have any objections?”

“None, sir. We’ll find Captain Shirogane and bring him back, sir.”

“That’s what I like to hear. Dismissed.”

James saluted. Keith merely nodded and left.

The door hadn’t fully closed behind him that he turned and punched the wall. Keith drove his fist hard enough into the concrete that a fissure appeared. James startled, taking a step back. Old, remembered pain blossomed in his jaw where Keith had punched him all those years ago. He had to resist the urge to rub at the aching spot.

“Nice,” he said sarcastically. “Who’s going to pay for this?”

The violence leaked out of Keith. The flush of anger receded from his cheeks after he’d taken a large, calming breath. “Sorry. I hate having stuff sprung at me.”

“Right.” James didn’t really know what to say. Staying professional was difficult. “So, about the mission? What do you want to do?”

He had to repress the urge to take control. They’d never get along without a show of trust. Keith would clamp up or become unmanageable the second he sensed James trying to take the lead. They regarded each other coolly for a moment. During the invasion, they’d been able to function side by side. There had been no friction, only neutral interactions. They had been two leaders doing their best for their respective team.

Things were more personal, however. There was no team to lead and no invaders to fight off, no urgency to hide behind. James’ heart chose that moment to thump against his ribs to remind him of his feelings. He looked away, refusing to feast his eyes on the other.

Keith exhaled loudly. “Iverson wants a detailed plan of action by noon tomorrow. Let’s meet after breakfast to get it done. It’ll give us time to review what he’s already sent us. How about at seven in my quarters?”

“In your quarters?” James replied, unsure. “It’s not proper.”

Keith threw him a disbelieving look. “Proper? Holy shit, have you missed the whole point, Griffin? To get on that planet, we’ll have to pretend to be a _couple_. We’ll be stuck in the same bedroom and probably even in the same bloody _bed_. If you can’t stand us being in the same room, speak up right now so Iverson can find me a better partner.”

Keith didn’t understand how torturous this was for James. Shamefully, he’d often daydreamed about such a situation, about being stuck with Keith on some mission that would drive them closer. The real thing was much scarier. In his fantasies, Keith was never this assertive. He wasn’t an omega that pretended to be an alpha.

“I’m sorry,” James said. “I understand perfectly the parameters of this mission and I accept the role I have to play.”

“You’re such a stick in the mud,” Keith commented, not unkindly. “Right. So I’ll see you tomorrow at seven. Good night, Griffin.”

“James.”

“Uh?”

“You’ll have to get used to calling me James. Couples don’t use each other’s last name.”

Keith pulled a face. “You’re right. Good night, James.”

“Good night, Keith.”

-

Of course, he hardly slept. Barely a wink. He spent the whole bloody night sitting on his bed, having a mental breakdown. He’d reviewed the information Iverson had forwarded him and he had no idea how he was going to pull through this. The mission itself was quite simple. It would have been a walk in the park had he been paired with someone other than Keith.

To clear his mind, he reviewed the notes he’d compiled.

Planet Mizipra was divided into four large regions. None of them were very populated. According to what he’d read on the alien race, although they had secondary genders, the Miziprans were highly infertile. Reproduction was something sacred. Children were to be revered, coddled, and brought up with the greatest care. They bonded young, but didn’t remain with their mate if no offspring was produced. Bonding was highly regulated by a committee, which meant they didn’t bond out of love. Ever since Mizipra had joined the Voltron Coalition, they’d accepted couples from other allied planets to visit theirs in in the hope of learning their ways. They seemed to believe that studying couples of other species would help them overcome their infertility problem. Despite that, they were very traditional in the sense that infidelity was punished by death, which was why only couples were allowed to visit.

The flora and fauna of the planet weren’t dissimilar to that of Earth. They didn’t have large predators, the largest animal seemingly no bigger than a cow. They had wide swathes of arable lands used by the Coalition. Like some cosmic joke, their land was highly fertile. There was also something in their water that facilitated the growth of crops. The flora in itself ranged from bushes to tall, sequoia-like trees. There were many beaches, especially in the southern, warmer regions. Most of the ground was flat, with only a few small hillocks that masqueraded as mountains.

What made it romantic, according to testimonies, were the colours. Looking at the photos of the place on his tablet, James understood the appeal. The shades of the ocean made it appear to be perpetually dusk. The soft tones of foliage and bushes gave the impression of being seen through a haze. There were two suns orbiting the planet, both weaker than Earth’s sun. Mizipra appeared to be constantly plunged in a state of early twilight, with long, soft shadows. It hardly rained and, when it did, it was akin to mist. It was beautiful. Everybody who’d visited the place sounded delighted by the experience. Even the food was to die for, apparently.

Despite the apparent paradise for couples, James couldn’t quite make this fit with what he knew of Captain Shirogane. Not to say that the captain wasn’t romantic—it just seemed unlikely for him to go to another planet for vacations with his fiancé, especially considering the fact he’d expressed no desire to leave Earth since the Galra invasion. There were nice spots on Earth where they could have gone.

Furthermore, there was also the fact that Captain Shirogane kept reporting to Iverson. The commander had forwarded the communication logs, and James could follow, almost to the hour, everything that the captain did. Why? Even if they’d been close friends, who reported that way on a romantic escapade? Captain Shirogane appeared to be a private person, why would he incessantly report in over the most inane things?

_Got up at six. Went for a run. Ate breakfast at eight. Went for a trek on trail number 6. Had lunch at noon. Came back to the hotel under the rain. Went for a swim in the indoor pool. Had a nap before supper._

And so on and so forth. James was only half surprised he didn’t write the times he fucked his fiancé.

With a groan, he threw his tablet on the bed. He rubbed his hands over his face tiredly. His eyes burned with the lack of sleep. He couldn’t settle down, not with that itch under his skin. Shirogane’s words danced in his mind, and he stupidly imagined what he’d do with Keith once they were there. Would they climb that small mountain together? Would they visit the beach? Would they lie under the night sky to count the stars? Would they have romantic dinners?

No, not with a kid.

Nervousness crept up his spine. He’d had to deal with the kid too, not only with Keith. James liked children, had wanted a bunch of his own, he just didn’t know how to behave with Keith’s own son. Well, at least now he knew it was a son named Sven. Would the kid become a liability? He was three, would he be old enough to understand what was going on or would he blow their cover? Would James have to pretend to be his father? No, that was one step too far. He couldn’t pretend the spawn of another alpha to be his.

How would it be to share the room with Keith? James grew hot under the collar at the thought. He’d have to be proper—he’d leave the bed to Keith and sleep on the couch. By sharing the room, surely no one would question what they did after the door was closed. Shit, not that James didn’t want to do anything. Perhaps they’ve have to actually share the bed—what if the maids who cleaned afterward noticed only Keith’s scent on the bedsheets? There could be questions. Sharing the bed would be a torture James wasn’t sure he could withstand. They’d put a pillow between them, then.

 _What if you don’t_ , his brain chanted. _What if you don’t use a pillow, what if you stop being a fucking weak alpha and just claim that unbonded omega? Show him his place. Show him that he’s beneath you. Take him, fuck him, mark him, make sure he carries your pups. You know he’s fertile, he’s had one brat while being unclaimed, the fucking slut._

“Fuck,” James hissed through clenched teeth. “Fuck, fuck.”

He buried his head in his hands, whishing his alpha side would just shut up. This wasn’t him, he wasn’t like that. He respected Keith too much to think of him that way. Yet there was no denying he still resented the other man’s arrogance and pride and cockiness. He’d been conditioned to believe that omegas were supposed to be meek, biddable, fragile. They weren’t supposed to be little spitfires, weren’t supposed to be brave and strong and capable and born leaders. Stupid Keith, the stupid walking contradiction.

This was going to kill him. Maybe the smart thing to do would be to beg off this mission. Iverson wouldn’t appreciate it, but he’d surely understand when presented with the right arguments. Perhaps finding a way to convince Álvarez to accompany Keith would be a good idea.

The thought of Keith sharing a room and a bed with that dumbass made James’ blood boil. Backing down in favour of that second-rate alpha was unthinkable—Álvarez didn’t deserve Keith.

James would have to suffer through this—he wasn’t weak, he wouldn’t let his basic instincts get the best of him. Who knew, maybe helping Keith save Captain Shirogane would win him some points. Maybe Keith would start considering him an equal, a friend. Everybody knew it was easier to go from friend to lover than from enemy to lover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is part of the LLF Comment Project, which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:  
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	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You guys, wow! Your reactions to this fict so far have been so amazing! I'm so glad you all are liking it! All those comments and kudos mean so much to me!
> 
> In case you are wondering, I tentatively added a number of total chapters planned for this story. It's not set in stone since I tend not to be able to follow the plans I make for my stories. It might change in the future.
> 
> So, here is the new chapter! You will get some interaction between James and Sven that was a delight to write.
> 
> Let me know what you think!
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> Enjoy!

The clatter of the tablet hitting the floor jerked him out of his light doze. James sat up groggily, confused. He’d slumped from his sitting position on his bed, his head pulled at an uncomfortable angle. There was now a crick in his neck and a pain in his spine.

And, yep, he had a morning wood. Damn it, he was twenty-seven, he should no longer have to deal with this! Hazy dreams of Keith came back to the front of his mind—they were the guilty ones. Stupid Keith and his stupid good-looks and his stupid good smell and his stupid huge eyes and his stupid plump lips and his stupid pert ass and—

“Get a grip on yourself, for fuck’s sake,” James said out loud, voice scratchy from disuse.

He picked up his tablet from the floor, glancing at the time. Six thirty. He had to meet with Keith at seven. He had exactly thirty minutes to shower, get rid of that embarrassment in his pants, grab something to eat, and hurry across the Garrison building to the quarters reserved to the Paladins of Voltron.

He’d gotten good at being up in the blink of an eye. When there’s an invasion going on, every second counts. James had grown used to sleeping sitting up, dressed in his flight suit, ready to jump into action at a moment’s notice. It might not have been needed much lately, but old habits die hard. In ten minutes he was showered, changed into a fresh uniform, and hurrying down the corridor towards the mess hall. A few, bleary-eyed cadets glanced at him as he grabbed an apple from a basket before being on his way again.

He reached the Paladins’ quarters with ten minutes to spare, only slightly winded. He paused in front of the door, unsure what protocol to follow. He supposed he’d been given access to this part of the building, it just seemed wrong to simply barge in. He cleared his throat, ran a hand through his hair, then knocked. Was Keith alone in there, or were Holt and Hunk present? Pidge Holt had a civilian girlfriend last James had heard so she often left the Garrison grounds, but Hunk seemed to reside permanently here. He’d somehow feel better with either of them present.

This wasn’t going to be his day. Keith opened the door after he’d knocked a second time, appearing to have been up for a while.

“Hey,” Keith said casually. “Come in.”

James gulped. He followed the other into the lounge that belonged to the Paladins. He’d been here a few times in the past, mostly to discuss war strategies during the Galra invasion. The place had felt too small for all the Paladins, Shirogane, and the MFE pilots. There hadn’t been enough room on the circular couch for them all to sit.

With only Keith present, the lounge looked too big. There was an air of abandonment to it, giving the impression that nobody had been here for a long while. Nothing had changed from James’ last visit. There stood the orange couch with the low table in the middle of the circle. There were five doors leading presumably to the bedrooms the Paladins had occupied. On one side were a counter with a sink, a small fridge, and a small cooker. The clutter on the countertop was the only sign that this place was inhabited. He noted the smell of cooked food mingling with the scent of freshly-brewed coffee.

Keith had made breakfast. Keith could cook. This did something weird to James’ nerves.

He felt stupid, standing there with his tablet tucked under one arm while Keith sat down on the couch, appearing totally at ease. This was his territory, filled with the memory of his pack, this was probably enough to make him comfortable. The scents had long washed away however—James couldn’t pick up any other than those of food and Keith’s own smell of campfire and dry earth. They should have met in a more neutral environment; a meeting room or a library or hell, on the outside, anywhere else that didn’t make him feel like he was stepping into Keith’s home.

“Maybe we should redirect this to a meeting room,” James suggested.

“No. Sven’s sleeping. I can’t leave him on his own.”

Oh, the kid. James hadn’t even thought about him.

“Is there going to be a problem?” Keith asked, sounding exasperated.

Yes, there was going to be a problem! James didn’t say so. He was a professional. He was Lieutenant James Griffin; he’d survived the Galra invasion, helped defeat the Altean witch Haggar, he wouldn’t be defeated by his crush. He’d been able to work alongside Keith in the past, he’d do it again.

“No.” He marched to the couch and set the tablet down on the table. “Everything’s fine.” He sat a respectful distance from the other. “Did you study the material Commander Iverson sent us?”

Keith nodded. “Yeah. It’s pretty basic stuff, not much to work with.”

“You know Captain Shirogane better than any of us. Is it normal for him to have sent the commander such a detailed day-to-day account?”

A shadow passed over Keith’s face. He hid it quickly by pulling his features into a thoughtful frown. James was proud of himself that he noted only in passing just how damn gorgeous that guy was.

“It’s true that it was kind of excessive. Shiro always kept a daily log, but it was never that exhaustive. I mean, he recorded stuff about combats, enemy positions or body counts. He wouldn’t have gone on for hours about what we ate and at what time we did.”

“That struck me as weird too. Why sent all of that to the commander in the first place?”

Keith leaned forward, elbows on his knees. “There’s something fishy going on. Iverson’s holding back information, I’m sure of it. This smells. Shiro wouldn’t have gone to a dumb planet like Mizipra in the first place.”

James paused delicately. “Are you sure? I mean, you certainly saw the photos, it’s kind of… romantic. It seems normal that he’d want to spend time with his fiancé.”

“Is that what they are now,” Keith said flatly. He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. It’s not like Shiro at all. He said he was tired of space so why would he be back out there?”

James wasn’t sure if he’d imagined the tone of desperation in Keith’s voice. This was difficult for him. He didn’t accept that Shirogane had moved on, that he’d moved on from his dream to explore space and from Keith himself. James couldn’t quite blame him—he didn’t understand it either. How could someone give up on space exploration? With this many alien species joining the Voltron Coalition, with that much technological advancement that made traveling faster and easier, how could he give up on that? The great unknown was within reach had he only dared seizing it.

But he hadn’t. The captain had given it up for a desk job. Perhaps it had to do with the trauma he’d experienced out there—he had lost an arm and been some through nasty shit after all. Nobody came back from war the same. It was entirely possible that Shirogane had had his fill of adventure to last him a lifetime, that he was satisfied with his safe 9 to 5 and with going home to his fiancé every night.

Keith didn’t seem to be expecting an answer, though James wished he could give him one. He could tell this question had been bothering him for a moment.

He contented himself with saying: “I don’t know. Things change. Let’s focus on the task at hand. What do you propose we do?”

This was the right thing to say: Keith lost his forlorn expression. His eyes sharpened. “We should follow Shiro’s schedule. Do what he did, follow in his footsteps, see what he saw. Don’t ask questions at first. We just… pretend that we’re there for fun. We give people time to trust us, to get used to us. Sometimes it’s easier to get answers by pretending to be friendly than by torturing it out. Who knows, we might learn a lot with mere gossip.”

“That makes sense. I’ll pull some strings and try to get more information on Mizipra, see if anyone else visiting has been reported missing. We need to make sure whether there was foul play involved first. Who knows, maybe the captain wanted to get off the grid for a while.”

Keith hummed thoughtfully. His eyes roamed the room and widened when they settled on the counter. “Oh, shit, I really suck at playing host! Do you want some coffee? Yeah, you do, you look asleep on your feet.”

James didn’t have time to open his mouth that Keith was on the other side of the lounge, pouring coffee into an orange and white cup. Pouring coffee for _him_. Willingly. It took less than three seconds, but James allowed himself to take in the beautiful sight of Keith Kogane pouring coffee. He committed to memory to graceful pull of his muscles beneath his shirt, the long, inky-black hair spilling down his back, the way the harsh light shone on the skin of his forearms, the swell of hips surely widened by birth, and those long, long legs clad in tight, tight pants.

Whoever had fathered a child on him was such a lucky bastard.

He took pride in his steady hands when Keith handed him the coffee mug. He couldn’t help thinking wryly that, fifteen years ago, Keith would have poured the hot liquid on his lap.

“All right,” Keith said, sitting back. He typed on his own phone. “while you check with the Coalition, I’ll check with the Blade’s database to see whether we have anything on Mizipra. We have century-old files. If Mizipra was ever a problem, there’s bound to be something. My mom’ll send it all over.”

 His mom. The statuesque Galra woman that hadn’t left his side during the invasion. James remembered thinking then how alike these two looked, even before knowing they were related. It had brought him an odd sense of relief to learn that Keith was half-alien. It had somehow explained so many things (it had somehow excused why James had always been second to him).

James pulled his tablet to him and started typing the short report they’d be presenting to Iverson later. He got lost in the familiar task of redacting a concise summary to be presented to a superior officer. A tiny part of himself relished how Keith and he had put together a simple plan in such a short time. It gave him hope that they could actually do teamwork, that perhaps this mission wasn’t totally doomed to end in a disaster. They could be professionals, they could be Lieutenant Griffin of the Galaxy Garrison and the leader of the Blade of Marmora. They didn’t have to be pining alpha James and beautiful unmated omega Keith.

Or they could be, a little. James could be, at least. He sneaked a look at Keith who was still typing away on his phone. Long strands of black hair fell across his face, framing his features. The hair was way too long for Garrison regulations. It was also a huge improvement from the ugly, uncombed, messy mullet he’d sported before. Why keep it this long? Didn’t it hinder him in a fight? James returned his attention to his own work, distractedly wondering how those soft strands would feel between his fingers or grasped in his fist.

The thought didn’t make him too hot under the collar, thankfully. He was able to keep focusing on his report, and he was about to hand it over to Keith for his approval when the sound of an opening door distracted him. He looked up to see the door painted in broad black swathes open. On the threshold stood a sleepy-eyed toddler, chubby cheeks still red from sleep.

“Dada,” the boy said.

He made his way on short, unsteady legs towards Keith who picked him up with practiced ease.

James was no longer able to pretend to be working, not while Keith got up, rested his son on his hip, and went to the counter, all the while talking softly. Watching him was an otherworldly experience for James. He hadn’t been able to imagine Keith having an ounce of softness in him yet here he was, asking his son what he wanted for breakfast, presenting him with options while the boy rested his head on his shoulder tiredly.

Longing spread through James’ chest like a parasite. He liked this side of Keith, the picture perfect of what an omega should be. Keith would be a good father to his children, a mixture of kindness and unparalleled strength. The omega’s traditional role of keeping house and being dependant on their alpha for protection sounded ridiculous applied to him. Keith could far more easily tear down anyone than James.

He refused to contemplate this any longer. Ugly feelings of unworthiness and anger would rear up, and he didn’t need that right now.

The kid, Sven, apparently chose oatmeal with milk. Keith deposited him on the floor while he prepared the mixture. Sven clung to his leg while darting glances in James’ direction. The boy didn’t look very shy, merely curious. His eyes were huge and dark in his small face. When their eyes met, James waved at him. Sven grinned awkwardly before turning his attention back to his father.

Once he’d been given a small bowl, Sven boldly made his ways towards the couch, climbed on it, and sat a short distance from James. His black eyes never left him, inquisitive.

“Introduce yourself,” Keith told his son. “You know how to do it.”

The boy scrunched his face up. “Hello. My name is Sven. I’m three.” He held up four fingers, scowled at them, pulled one down. “Three.”

Holy shit, he was cute. James had to smile. “Hello, Sven. My name is James. I’m friends with your father.”

Sven frowned. “Why isn’t your skin purple?”

The sound that Keith made might have been a repressed chortle.

James didn’t understand the question until he realised the child had probably spent most of his life surrounded by Galras. Although of various physiognomy, the Galras all shared the trait of purplish skin or fur.

“I’m human, like your father.”

Sven mulled that information over while he ate his runny oatmeal. James tried to ignore him while he went back to his report. He’d stopped in the middle of a sentence that he didn’t seem able to finish. He was acutely aware of Keith moving about the lounge and of Sven seated an arm’s length away. He couldn’t regain his concentration back. He concluded the report half-heartedly, hoping Commander Iverson wouldn’t noticed it’d been botched.

“I’m done with the report,” he announced “Do you want to go over it?”

Keith shrugged and took the tablet from him before sitting back down on the couch. By giving the tablet away, James had nothing left to fiddle with, nothing to keep himself occupied. It wasn’t quite awkward, just a bit odd. He liked the domesticity of the scene. He revelled in it a little, hoping things were going to be this easy once they reached Mizipra. If they could cohabit in this way, perhaps the mission wouldn’t be such a nightmare. James liked the thought of being on good terms with Keith, of being able to share his space with ease. They could pass for friends.

Sven eventually finished his breakfast. He handed the empty bowl and spoon to James who took it all without complaint. There was oatmeal smeared on the boy’s cheeks and chin. Without thinking, James reached out and wiped it off with the back of his fingers.

Realising what he was doing, he pulled his hand quickly. Omegas were protective of their young and an alpha not related by blood could be a threat. James glanced in Keith’s direction, certain he’d be baring his teeth at him in warning. Instead, there was an amused glow in Keith’s eyes, a fond smile on his lips.

“You’re good with kids,” he commented.

James didn’t know what to answer. Sven, totally uncaring about the awkward situation, hopped off the couch to make his way towards the bedroom.

“Uh, Ryan has two kids that I babysit sometimes.”

Keith returned his attention to the tablet. “To be honest, I’m surprised you haven’t settled down yet.”

The off-hand comment made James sit up straighter. He deposited the crockery on the table, uncertain what to make of this. “Ah?”

Keith quirked an eyebrow at him. “Why do you sound like that? You’re a good catch.”

“You think so?” James’ voice mercifully didn’t shake, but his hands had gone clammy. He resisted the urge to wipe them on his pant legs.

“Yeah.”

In a very Keith fashion, he didn’t elaborate. He left James to stew in his own confusion. He wanted to ask _why_ he was a good catch, hoping this could give him a clue about Keith’s feelings for him. Keith didn’t elaborate.

“The report sounds fine,” he said after a while. He gave the tablet back. “Iverson should be happy with it.”

This was his clue. He got to his feet. “Yes. I’ll see you at his office at noon.”

“Yeah. See you.”

Keith had already lost interest in him, busying himself with cleaning up the dirty dishes from breakfast.

James left the lounge, ears ringing. He felt as he did when his jet plunged too quickly towards the ground, leaving his stomach somewhere behind. All in all, the whole meeting hadn’t been too bad. It hadn’t been that awkward either.

He could only hope this was a good omen for the mission to come.

-

Commander Iverson appeared satisfied with the report they presented. He deemed them ready to go and then gave James more paperwork. Of course he gave it all to James; Keith would just throw it all away without a look behind.

He spent the afternoon making lists, planning, reading further on Mizipra, and trying to assess what luggage he’d need. They had no clear timeline to work with. Captain Shirogane had been reporting in for two weeks before he went completely silent, James therefore supposed he’d have to pack for a couple of weeks at least. The commander had made it clear that the Miziprans couldn’t suspect they had been sent by the Coalition, which meant no Garrison uniform. This depressed James a little because, looking through his few belongings made him realise he barely had any civilian clothes left. He rarely left the Garrison grounds and, when he did, it was never for more than a few days at the time. He’d have to make do with what he had at hand.

At supper time, Ryan, Nadia, and Ina stopped by to drag him to the mess hall. They knew he was leaving on a mission—they couldn’t _not_ be told—but they had no idea what it entailed. They knew he was going to be stuck with Keith. They gave him pitying looks throughout the meals, acting like he was marching to his death rather than going on a simple mission.

“How about we go out tonight?” Nadia suggested excitedly. She winked. “We could hit a club and give James the chance to relieve his stress.”

“What are you implying?” James demanded.

“She is suggesting that you get rid of your pent up sexual frustration before you are stuck with the man responsible for that sexual frustration,” Ina supplied helpfully.

James’ face suddenly felt hot. Nadia grinned while Ryan heaved a long, disconsolate sigh. Ina didn’t care much. She was focused on her meal, methodically cutting her meat into small, neat squares.

James ate in silence for a while, trying to evaluate the merit of Nadia’s proposition. Would _getting rid of his pent up sexual frustration_ actually make it easier to deal with Keith later on? It was true that it’d been a while since he’d gotten laid… There was simply no time for it. He didn’t hook up with fellow officers or, heaven forbid, cadets. Not only was this frowned upon, it was the perfect recipe for disaster. Nadia had often found herself hiding in shadowy corners of the Garrison to avoid spurned lovers, once hiding under James’ bed when one particularly clingy boyfriend refused to leave her alone.

What could it hurt, though? As long as he didn’t get drunk at the club, none would be the wiser. He could be back tomorrow morning at eight for the scheduled departure time.

Except that he did kind of yearned to get drunk. The words Keith had spoken earlier about him being a good catch wouldn’t stop resonating in his mind. He had been a good catch to someone for three years and the breakup that had happened a year ago still left a bitter taste in his mouth. He didn’t want to think about it, or he might get it into his foolish head to call, to chat, to exchange pleasantries, to perhaps meet up, to perhaps hook up, only to have the whole debacle happen again.

“Yeah, let’s do it,” he said, getting quickly to his feet.

“I can’t go,” Ryan said. “I’m on duty this evening. Have fun.”

-

He did have fun. He found himself a pretty little omega, too old and too scrawny to his taste, too biddable, but he was satisfied nonetheless.

He went back to the Garrison shamefully smelling of sex and booze, exhausted, dismayed to see that the sun was rising over the horizon. It painted the sand blood red. Although he hadn’t drunk that much, the tiredness made it difficult to concentrate on his driving. He took it slow. The thought of crashing his car and needing to call the Garrison to tow it back scared him shitless; especially because Iverson would learn of it, would want to see him, would disapprove mightily of his half-drunk disheveled state, and would berate him for being this irresponsible the night prior to a mission. This could even lead to a disciplinary hearing, a blot on his otherwise flawless record.

He made it back to the Garrison in one piece. After he’d parked the car, he leaned forward to rest his forehead on the steering wheel. The cool leather felt good against his warm skin. Sleeping with that omega had been stupid. Amongst all those available, he’d feared he’d go for one with raven-black hair. Instead, he’d chosen one with blond hair, just to be sure to hurt himself a bit deeper. Going to that club had been stupid. The one good side was that at least he was now both physically and emotionally wrung out, ready to face Keith, this mission, and whatever it entailed.

Nadia had left the club on her own after she’d seen he was going to hook up with an omega. When their path crossed in the corridor, she grinned knowingly at him without commenting. She meant well, he knew. He smiled at her in passing. She mimed texting, meaning she’d want the details later.

A good, noisy friend Nadia was.

He took a long shower, carefully washing away the scent of the nameless omega. The warm water helped relax him. Going through the familiar, mindless motions of scrubbing his skin filled him with calm.

He dressed into civilian clothes, foregoing his Garrison uniform for the first time in months. His image reflected in the mirror wasn’t unpleasing. He knew he was good-looking—he’d been told he had a handsome face often and that his self-confidence made him more attractive. Was this what Keith was referring to when he alluded that he was a good catch? Did Keith find him handsome? James didn’t know. He didn’t know Keith’s tastes—he’d only ever seen him pining after Captain Shirogane.  If that was what interested him, James was more than screwed.

He sighed, grabbed his bag, and made his way towards the hangar. He arrived ten minutes early. Already, the place was busy. People were going on about their business in a sort of well-orchestrated pandemonium. Fellow officers nodded at him. Everybody was too properly trained to ask questions about his civilian clothes or the bag he’d slung over his shoulder.

Keith wasn’t there yet, but his two Blade friends were: Zethrid and the one with the orange skin. They both perked up at the sight of him. Awkwardly, he joined them, feeling stupidly self-conscious. They were half-Galras and they used to be enemies. Shit, Zethrid had nearly killed Keith in front of his very eyes. He had no idea how to behave with them. Zethrid was very obviously an alpha. She had no trouble making it known by ramping up her scent a notch, making it unpleasant for him. The other one, an omega, cooed and giggled, hanging on Zethrid’s big arm.

“So, you’re the boss’… plus one,” Zethrid commented gruffly, looking James up and down. “You’re puny.”

“I’m not puny,” James retorted. “Humans are smaller than Galras.”

“You’re puny for an alpha,” the omega woman chimed in. “Even for a human one. The boss is going to eat you up for breakfast.”

The words sent a lance of pain through James’ chest. He had to make a conscious effort not to stagger back. He tightened his grip on the strap of his bag, wrestling with self-control. They were both staring at him unblinkingly, akin to hawks. They wanted to gage his reaction, to see how he’d react to an insult against his manhood. He could tell they expected him to have a typical alpha reaction and to be angry. He stamped down on his rage, swallowing the barbed, venomous feeling down.

“I’m Lieutenant James Griffin,” he said, sticking out his hand for a handshake. “I was indeed chosen by Commander Iverson for this mission.”

The omega woman had only one eye, the presumably ruined one hidden by a patch. Her expressive face showed surprise at his cool, composed introduction. Giggling, she shook his hand, deciding to play along.

“Nice to meet you, Jamie. My name is Ezor, and this is Zethrid. Let’s do our best to find the boss’ friend, shall we?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awww the overwhelmingly good reactions this fic has been getting make me so happy! Thank you so very much to you all! And a special thank you to those who take time out of their busy day to write a comment!
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> **Please take note that there are mentions of PTSD in this chapter.**

“Is that the new S17 edition? The one that comes in black?” James couldn’t stop himself from blurting out the second he laid eyes upon Keith’s ship.

“Yeah,” Keith answered, amusement lacing his voice. He came to stand beside James, looking up at the glossy, sleek, four-seater space ship. “Can go from here to the sun in half a day. Faster than your jet and without the autonomy problems. My mom got it for my birthday.”

James groaned. “Lucky bastard. You’ll let me pilot her, won’t you?”

“I’ll think about it. Come on.”

Keith touched an invisible switch on the side of the ship and an access ramp was lowered. As he explained it, despite its relatively small size, the ship could also transport quite a lot of cargo. James could only gawk at the whole thing, too gobsmacked to think of being jealous. Galra technology never failed to amaze him. Despite being constantly busy, he did try to keep abreast of technological advancements, especially those involving ships. The research and development department headed by Hunk was secretly one of his favourite places at the Garrison.

Since Keith wasn’t a permanent resident of the Garrison, his ship had been stationed outside, amongst dozens other such crafts. His was evidently the most advanced and, according to James, the coolest.

“I hope you weren’t thinking of leaving without saying goodbye.”

They turned to see the youngest Holt sibling standing there with her arms crossed over her chest. Although of the same age as them, she appeared a decade younger, what with her short stature and mop of unkempt brown hair. With her was Hunk and, surprisingly, James’ own team.

“Did you tell them about the mission?” James asked Keith incredulously.

Keith shrugged, switching Sven from one hip to the other. “Yeah, of course. Shiro’s their friend, they have a right to know.”

“Ah, it’s about Captain Shirogane!” Nadia exclaimed.

“Contrary to someone I won’t name,” James hissed at Keith’s puzzled expression, “I didn’t discuss the mission.” He heaved a sigh. “But yes, it is about Captain Shirogane. I expect you three to keep your mouth shut or the commander will have my head on a pike.”

“Don’t worry, we won’t say a word!” Nadia promised. “Keith, can I hold the baby?”

While Nadia cooed at a confused-looking Sven, Ryan took James aside. The dreaded lecture from two days ago was finally coming.

“Are you going to be okay?” Ryan asked in a low voice.

His concern was touching. He truly was a good friend, the one who took care of everybody else in the team while they were too busy to do so themselves. He was always there, a silent, comforting shadow that could be relied upon. More than once, he’d been the only thing keeping James afloat. During the invasion, after the bad breakup, Ryan had lent a sympathetic ear. He never judged, never jumped to conclusions. He was brutally honest, sometimes painfully. He stated his opinion politely, uncompromisingly.

“I don’t know,” James answered honestly. There was no point in lying to Ryan, he’d see through it immediately. “I kind of feel I’m heading for the gallows.”

“I understand. Try not to get too emotionally invested, that’s the only advice I can think of. And call, okay?”

“I’ll have to check that we can have secure lines. This mission is supposed to be undercover.”

“I didn’t mean for you to call about the mission.”

Calling him to complain about Keith wouldn’t be awkward; James had ranted about him to Ryan for an ungodly amount of hours, sometimes while being drunk, more often while being sober. Ryan had taken it all in stride, making sure he didn’t drown in alcohol. Frankly, those hadn’t been James’ finest hours.

“I will,” James sighed. “Thanks, man. I’ll do that. It’s just another mission.”

Ryan regarded him coolly, searching his face. They both knew this wasn’t just another mission, that it was almost impossible not to get emotionally invested. They hadn’t even left Earth that James was already a mess.

“All right,” Ryan concluded with a nod.

James offered him a smile. “By the way, tell Isabella and the kids I say hi. I’ll take little Maite to the fair once I come back, like I promised.”

“She’ll be looking forward to it.”

Ryan patted his back and they rejoined the small group.

It was now Ina’s turn to hold Sven. She was holding him at arm’s length, studying him with her head cocked to the side the way a scientist would look at an odd new bug. Her features set in a blank mask didn’t fool James; she was on to something. She kept her observations to herself, mercifully, and handed Keith his kid back without a fuss. Sven was either used to being passed around or he truly was a chill kid because he didn’t seem to mind all those new faces. He looked at them with wide, curious eyes, one thumb popped into his mouth.

“Ready?” Keith asked.

He sounded impatient to get going. There was a nervous tension thrumming through his body. He was already turning towards his ship, exasperated in a way that suggested James was holding him back on purpose.

James sighed. He nodded his farewell to his friends. Nadia, being her overdramatic self, was mimicking wiping tears from her eyes, waving him off with a white handkerchief. Ina’s gaze was riveted on Sven. Ryan gave him an encouraging small smile. The Paladins themselves didn’t appear very worried, though Hunk’s eyes were a bit teary.

And to think Earth had depended on them once.

The interior of the ship wasn’t less impressive than the exterior. Not wanting to appear to be a country bumpkin, he tried not to gawk too much at the alien contraptions. He put his bag in the cargo space situated under the floor. In the meantime, Keith strapped his son to one of the seats, using a big cushion to make Sven taller so he wouldn’t get strangled by the security harness. Sven had a very serious expression on his face, not squirming. This seemed to be routine for him, making James wonder how often Keith took him into space.

Since there was a co-pilot chair, James supposed this would be his seat. He sat down, trying to take in everything. The console was mostly taken up by a large, blank screen. There were a few switches, their function stencilled in the Galra alphabet. The controls were different from the ones in his jet.

His pulse quickened. He didn’t dare touch anything yet, but he hoped fervently that Keith would be a good sport and let him try piloting. Just once, just for a minute. James knew he could handle it, could take to it as quickly as Keith had.

Keith rejoined him in the cockpit, taking the pilot seat easily. He’d probably caught James’ longing looks because he gave him a crooked smirk. The smirk reminded James of their cadet days, when Keith would succeed at a particularly difficult sim and rub it all in their unworthy faces. This used to bother James a lot. Now, older and thankfully wiser, he had to admit that Keith had surpassed him (only at piloting alien aircrafts of course).

With a touch of the hand, the whole cockpit lit up in a purplish light. The screen on the console came to life immediately. A series of symbols appeared, flashing, then were gone to be replaced by many, many indicators. Though the language was unknown to him, James understood enough of piloting to make an educated guess at what they all meant.

Around him, the other screens came online. The view of the outside appeared in a wide angle. From a distance, James caught sight of the Paladins and his friends observing from the runway. The image was clear, perfect, like seen through glass rather than through a camera.

“Ready?” Keith asked, tone teasing.

“Just don’t kill us, Kogane.”

Keith didn’t kill them. Had his son not been on board, James was pretty sure his piloting would have been far more reckless. Instead, the launch went smoothly, without a hitch. There was no difference in pressure in the cabin. If James hadn’t literally seen the ground receding, he’d have thought the ship hadn’t moved. There was a bit of turbulence when the ship hit the atmosphere before it popped free of the planet’s pull. Keith touched a few dials on the screen, stabilising everything, making small adjustments.

Once Earth had shrunk to the size of a coin, Keith passed to autopilot mode.

“Enter Mizipra’s coordinates on the computer there,” he said, pointing to a smaller console to James’ left.

The purplish keyboard glowed faintly. James pulled out his phone, looked at their destination coordinates’, and entered them. His hand didn’t shake despite his excitement.

A map of the neighbouring solar systems appeared on the screen that showed a view of the outside. Amongst millions of tiny white dots, it showed the trajectory the ship would take to reach Mizipra. It seemed very, very far away. James looked at it, his excitement mingling with a tiny note of vertigo.

“Have you ever gone this far?” he asked.

Keith glanced at the map. “Yeah, much farther. New Altea is over there and Daibazaal is there.” Both planets lit up in a brighter purple.

With these two places for reference, James’ dread receded somewhat. Looking closer, he finally recognized the stars and planets he had seen and heard of during the war. Mizipra was about the same distance from Earth as Daibazaal, though in a different solar system.

“Do you live on Daibazaal?” James asked after a while.

“Mostly I live on my ship, but yeah.”

James frowned, looking around. “Seriously? You live in here? With your kid?”

Keith scoffed. “No. We have a mothership. It’s about the size of the Atlas. My quarters on the ship are probably larger than yours at the Garrison.”

“Because you’re the leader.” A pause. “So… the mothership is yours?”

“Kind of.”

“Shit, being a Blade of Marmora seems lucrative.”

Keith laughed. “No, it’s not! Most of what we have has been given to us by refugees or by planets that we help. You’d be surprised at the things people consider less important than food. Half the fighters on my flotilla have been gifted to us in exchange for food.”

“Uh, that’s neat.”

James hadn’t known that. There was very little he knew about what was happening in space, actually. News trickled slowly to Earth, and whatever arrived was filtered before reaching the public. The Garrison higher-ups, those far above James’ paygrade, were pretty tight-lipped about it all. Everything was on a need-to-know basis. Since James didn’t need to know, he was never told anything.

“We’ll be stuck in here for two days,” Keith said, crossing his arms over his chest, “let’s talk.”

“About what?”

“About what we’re going to do on Mizipra. Although I’d much prefer if we just barged in and broke a few noses until someone mentions Shiro, we can’t do that, apparently. You heard what Iverson said, only couples are allowed on that planet. We have to convince them. They’ve probably seen millions of couples, meaning they’ll certainly be able to tell we’re faking if we’re not careful enough.”

The novelty of the ship had totally obliterated Mizipra from James’ mind. It wasn’t like him to get distracted this easily. He had to get a grip on himself. He cleared his throat, turning his attention fully to what Keith was saying. His assumptions made sense. A bunch of aliens used to seeing couples would surely have picked up signs associated with their behaviour, in the same way humans knew that two people holding hands meant they were together. Usually.

Their gaze met. Keith’s eyes were unreadable with too many emotions. He looked worried and resolute and annoyed and disconsolate all at the same time. James didn’t know what to think of that—he wasn’t sure of what he was thinking himself. Planning their visit to Mizipra back at the Garrison had made it look surreal, distant. They could have been planning for someone else. Discussing it now, in the enclosed privacy of the ship, made it realer. It brought home the fact that they were the ones who’d have to pretend to be a couple. They would have to be closer than they had ever been. Even without his feelings for Keith interfering, James couldn’t be certain it would be an easy thing to do. Although they had been in the periphery of one another since they were ten, they had never been close.

“That’s true,” James said, nodding. “What do you suggest?”

It seemed better to let Keith decide of that. He was a prickly person, and James feared overstepping some boundaries.

Keith looked embarrassed. “We should come up with a background story. Like, how we met and such stuff.”

“We met at school. We hated each other at first. We even fought a few times. We drifted apart, and when our paths crossed again, we…” James faltered, unable to say _we fell in love_. He cleared his throat. “What about Sven?”

“The result of a tryst.”

Was it the truth? Was that how Sven had been conceived, during a careless one-night stand? James had trouble swallowing. Keith’s carefully blank face revealed nothing, daring James to ask questions.

“Right, uh, we’ve been together for a year. We’re taking a few weeks off work. We’re both pilots.”

“You plan on asking me to marry you after my next heat, which will explain why we aren’t bonded.”

Many things happened in James’ brain at the same time. It all short-circuited, leaving him sitting there mutely. Holy shit, had did Keith manage to talk about this kind of stuff with a straight face? Didn’t he find it weird? James wasn’t used to such straightforwardness. Talking about personal things like _heats_ with anyone except your closest friends or family members was considered vulgar, gauche.

Sensing his discomfiture, Keith turned his attention to the console, giving him a few moments to gather his wits. James tried to think logically about this: they were pretending to be a couple, couples talked about this stuff.

The fact that his dumb brain kept trying to push on him images of Keith in heat didn’t make things easier. Shit, he was supposed to be stronger than that, stronger than his urges. He had to get a grip on himself or they would fail this mission. James couldn’t abate failure. He didn’t want to lose face, didn’t want to be the reason they couldn’t rescue Captain Shirogane and his fiancé, didn’t want Keith to hate him because of that. The only thing James had left in his life was his job, he couldn’t afford to lose it by being a horny teenager.

“Yes, that makes sense,” he said, proud that his voice didn’t quake. He took in a deep breath. “I’m sorry, I’m not comfortable talking about this.”

Keith shrugged one shoulder. “That’s fine. I don’t like it either, but I’d do more than talk about my heats to help save Shiro.” He kept silent, his profile lit by the purple lights of the console. “I’ll do whatever I have to do to save him. If it means I have to share a bed with you, I’ll do it.”

James’ eyes widened. “W-what?!”

“Not having sex with you, moron! Just sleeping in the same bed!”

They were both flustered. James wanted to die. He rubbed his face with his hands. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s fine. I knew you’d be all prim and proper. I meant what I said though: I’ll stop at nothing to save Shiro. I’d be very angry if your… _primness_ got us under suspicion.” Keith said the word _primness_ with a curl to his lip, making it sound disdainful.

“It won’t. I’m a professional, Keith.” James huffed out a breath. “Look, usually, there are mission parameters. We know what we can and can’t do. It makes it easier to work. How about we establish parameters? Boundaries? And saying _I’ll do anything necessary to save Shiro_ doesn’t help me.”

Keith considered this for a moment. “All right. A lot depends on how nosy the Miziprans are, I suppose. If they are content with us holding hands, then it’s perfect. If they listen at doors, we might have a problem. Shiro never wrote anything about this in his report. What else I’ve read by other people who visited Mizipra isn’t that conclusive either. My mother asked around amongst the Galras and those who visited Mizipra hinted that they were a nosy bunch. Just so you know, Galras aren’t a shy people. Like, they don’t mind… erm… going at it in public. It used to be for survival, you know? If a Galra finds a Mizipran nosy, it means they like to eavesdrop. Anyway. It might be more self-preservation than nosiness, of course. The Miziprans are obsessed with the fact that they have trouble having children, so they observe how the other races do it, especially other races that are fertile.”

James refused to think. “You think we might have to do more than holding hands.”

“It’s suppositions at this point. I’m only saying it can happen. It all depends on what we see once we get there.”

An uncomfortable silence stretched, full of innuendos. James managed to keep a cool head, thinking logically about it. “We’ll revaluate this… particular problem once on site,” he suggested, staring out at the vast universe. “For the moment, let’s agree to hold hands in public. Is that agreeable with you?”

Keith wiped his hands on his pant legs. “Yeah, it’s fine. I’ll be back, let me check on Sven.”

He got up and went to check on his son. Sven, still buckled safely into his seat, looked content enough playing some game on his father’s cellphone. This reinforced James’ supposition that the kid was used to travelling this way. Did that mean Keith took him on his humanitarian travels? Was it even safe? James wasn’t sure he’d appreciate for his own child to be dragged along that way in what could be dangerous situations.

The pause in their conversation gave his mind time to go down the gutter, of course. Keith had said he was ready to do anything to save Captain Shirogane, hinting that he’d have sex with James if necessary. James tried not to imagine it, he really did because it would be wrong to sleep with Keith under such circumstances. He didn’t want it to be duty. He knew he’d enjoy it nonetheless, however. The thought of pinning Keith down on the bed, of settling between his legs, it all left him feeling light-headed.

They barely talked after that. Since the ship was set on a trajectory, there was little to do except checking the dials once in a while. Keith obviously knew what he was doing. He sat easily in his seat with his booted feet propped up on the console. After a while, Sven grew tired of sitting, so he was allowed to roam freely around the ship’s cockpit. There wasn’t much room to manoeuvre, but he was small and managed to have a fun time exploring around. It wasn’t very safe according to James, an observation he kept to himself. He busied himself with a book on his phone.

Although the systems they were traversing were safe, Keith suggested they took turn sleeping. There was a sleeping module at the back, a single, narrow cot that could be lowered from its casing inside a wall. James let him sleep first; Sven was obviously tired and wanted to sleep with Keith. The lights were dimmed until only the console and its dials were backlit in soft lilac.

James settled for a long, boring night. He amused himself by watching the stars fly by. The ship passed a good number of different planets, some inhabited, others barren wastelands. The set course followed trading routes that had been established by the Voltron Coalition. It was utterly safe, for many allies patrolled them against space pirates and any other such rogues. Guarding the routes and convoys that used them had been one of the Atlas’ main functions before it was permanently grounded last year. James had personally been on such expeditions a few times.

Watching space from the Atlas’ bridge and watching it from this small ship was a totally different matter. On the Atlas, it had felt like watching a movie about space. The thick windows coupled with the sheer, huge size of the cruiser had made the planets and stars and celestial bodies look distant, surreal. From his co-pilot seat, the view was closer, more personal. The nebulas in the distance were a coruscating cascade of bright colours. The white stars dazzled. Planets of the strangest shape looked close enough to touch.

It was peaceful. James allowed himself to relax. He copied Keith’s earlier pose and stretched his legs on the console, careful not to touch anything. The motion and proximity sensors didn’t pick anything up. All was calm. They could be drifting on their own in the middle of nowhere.

Lulled by the soft sound of air circulating inside the cockpit, James dozed off, head propped up on his fist.

The sound of an explosion jerked him out of his dream. He sat bolt upright, heart racing, sweat breaking out on his skin. He looked around, eyes huge, certain that he’d see a Galra cruiser speeding up to ram them. The purple lights surrounding him made him panic. Purple equalled the Galras, the enemy. Purple backlit consoles meant downed Galra fighters, meant sneaking into the city to finish off those warriors who hadn’t died in the crash, meant ambush and firefight and pain and downed friends—

James jumped to his feet, hands scrambling for his blaster. Where was it? Why wasn’t it within reach? Surely he couldn’t have been foolish enough to fall asleep without it nearby?

A hand fell on his shoulder and he whirled, ready to fight back any huge, mauve-coloured alien.

“Griffin! Snap out of it! You’re safe!”

The voice. It was familiar. The hand was too small to be Galran.

James blinked and blinked until the traces of his nightmare receded. Keith’s face slowly came into focus.

“Hey, you okay?” he asked gently.

James took a second to ground himself. He pressed his palm against the seat, feeling the cool, smooth material. Finally, the bands of iron that had clasped around his chest loosened, allowing him to take in a full, shuddering breath.

“Y-yeah,” he managed to say.

His jaw ached after he’d gritted his teeth hard. The dentist had once told him to stop doing that or there would be no enamel left on his teeth by the time he turned thirty.

He slumped back into his seat, exhausted. His shirt stuck to his skin with sweat. He pushed back his fringe.

Out the corner of his eye, James saw Keith sit. He didn’t dare look at him, didn’t want to risk seeing the pity in his eyes. He was so, so tired of pity, of being looked at like he was some broken thing.

Keith rummaged under his seat and brought out a high-protein energy bar. He handed it to James. “I’m always hungry after nightmares. Eat this.”

James hesitated for half a second before turning. There was no pity in Keith’s gaze, only understanding. Of course Keith would understand—he’d been through hell too. He took the food offered and ate. The energy bar tasted bland, like any other kind of rations in the world. Chewing on it did help bring him back fully into reality.

“I still dream of the day of the invasion,” James offered quietly. “I remember every single time I walked into that damn town to search for survivors or for provisions. It’s seared into my brain. I remember it sometimes more vividly than what I did yesterday.”

Keith sat quietly, all loose limbs and deadly grace. He was facing forward, looking out at the screen towards the universe that had taken incredibly much from them. “I remember every fight against every Robeast. I remember the mistakes we made. I’ve made it my duty to memorize every one of our failures to make sure they never happen again. I remember how it felt to pilot Red and Black, the connection I had with them. I remember the fear the others felt through our bond and I remember the fear of letting them down. There are days I miss it, you know? I miss the companionship and the easiness of working with old comrades. I miss Black and I miss Allura and I miss Voltron. I don’t miss the danger, but I miss the adrenaline rush, you know?” He added that last part with a wry grin.

James had to grin back. “Yeah, I know about all that.” He heaved a sigh. “Who would have thought we’d end up saving the universe, hell, the multiverse, when we joined the Garrison, eh?”

Keith laughed. “All we wanted was to explore space, perhaps go further than Kerberos. We got more than we bargained for, didn’t we?”

Keith was smiling, looking at him, his purple eyes bright with remembrance.

And James fell headlong into love again.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, you all are so nice to me! All your comments, all your kudos, they make me happier than you could ever imagine! It's a blessing to write knowing people like what you do!
> 
> This chapter is a bit short and a bit of a filler, I'm sorry to say. They'll be arriving on the planet in the next chapter. I hope you will like this one nonetheless!
> 
> Enjoy!

The second day of traveling went similarly to the first. Spending time in an enclosed, narrow space with Keith wasn’t nearly as dreamy as James had expected. Keith was nice, nicer than in his memories, but he kept an emotional distance nonetheless. Whenever they talked, James got the impression that he held himself back. Keith was also worried about Shirogane, which made him snap the second they mentioned him or the rescue mission.

They didn’t continue their talk about boundaries either, another subject James was reluctant to bring up. He supposed they’d decide what to do about this after they’d reached Mizipra, after ascertaining what awaited them there.

Most of the time though, they got along just fine. Keith had become a master at keeping his son occupied. He sat Sven on his lap and played _find the yellow planet_ for a while. Sven also liked to doodle on a tablet with a stylus, a bunch of disconnected lines he wanted James to identify. Keith had learned Galran from his mother and he accepted to teach James a few words, and how to read the dials on the console.

He still refused to let him pilot.

Early in what would be afternoon, the proximity alerts informed them there was a small asteroid field up ahead. Keith suggested they skirt it. James called him a coward.

Keith grinned, disconnected the autopilot, and floored it.

Two minutes later, the ship burst from the field totally unscathed. Sven whooped in excitement and clapped his hands, saying this was his favourite part of any trip with _dada_. James raised an eyebrow at Keith who chuckled nervously.

“He’s got pilot blood in his veins,” was all he volunteered.

 After that, they ate a meal of dried rations. The only fresh food went to the kid, who ate stolidly. Like every other child in history, he didn’t want to eat his vegetables. James was pretty sure Keith would lose his patience. He didn’t. He coaxed one, then two spoonful of mashed vegetables into Sven’s mouth until the whole thing was gone. A lot of it ended up on the boy’s cheeks and chin, though it was the thought that mattered.

They were adorable to watch. James pretended to be engrossed in his book while observing it all out the corner of his eye. It was surprising how gentle Keith could be. James had never known him to be anything other than prickly. As a teenager, Keith had been brisk and loud and savage, talking with his fists rather than with his mouth. He was the complete opposite with his son. Sven wasn’t afraid of him; he never flinched or try to get away whenever Keith sighed in exasperation at his antics. Clearly, nobody had ever raised a hand to him. Sven was even friendly to James whom he hadn’t known a week ago. He must have gotten that amicable demeanour from his other father.

James had hooked his phone to the central screen of the ship so they could watch a movie when a beeping sound interrupted. The movie paused automatically, the screen shifted, and Galra words flashed. Keith didn’t look alarmed at all. He remained sprawled on his seat with Sven asleep on his chest. He touched a button on the console.

“Incoming call,” he told James after seeing his puzzled expression.

On the screen, the image shifted. The connection had to be bad because the image was covered in static, too much to be cleared. Keith grunted, typed on the console, twisted a knob, and the whole thing stabilised.

“Hey, Lance,” Keith said. “Sven’s asleep, try being quiet.”

James groaned in annoyance as Lance Álvarez’ weasel face appeared on the screen. The colours were off, bleeding into each other a little, but not enough for him not to recognize the other man.

“ _Hey, Keith!”_ Álvarez squinted. “ _Ah, yeah, hi Griffin too, I guess. I’m surprised you’re still alive._ ”

“Right back at you,” James grumbled.

Keith and Álvarez talked for a long moment, keeping their voices low not to wake Sven up. James tuned them off, annoyed that movie night had been interrupted by this dumbass. He turned all of his attention to his book, pretending to be engrossed in case Álvarez thought it a good idea to chat him up too. He seemed to be talking about New Altea and whatever he was doing over there (probably just being his stupid self). The Altean markings on his cheeks glowed a faint blue, and James hated that he trusted that colour more than the purplish glow reflecting off Keith’s skin.

The conversation shifted after a moment towards Keith’s mission. They talked about Captain Shirogane, going together over the messages he’d sent Commander Iverson before his disappearance. James had to stop himself from telling them this was all supposed to be confidential. It would be useless; when it came to the Paladins, Keith lost all common sense. James let them talk in the faint hopes that they might come up with a new idea. Well, in case _Keith_ came up with a new idea; it wasn’t as if Álvarez could think to save his life.

Álvarez obviously grew tired of the talking in circles because he asked after Sven next.

The affectionate note in his voice pricked James’ ear. He listened with more attention. Álvarez was evidently fond of the boy; he asked about his wellbeing and his hobbies and whether he still hated eating vegetables. This all of course could be chalked off to Álvarez being a good friend or to his longing to have children of his own.

The thought that Sven could be Álvarez’ son didn’t make sense. James refused to let it. Surely, Keith wouldn’t have slept with this _loser_? James’ mouth was suddenly dry at the thought that Keith could prefer Álvarez to him; Álvarez who’d always been the buffoon, the underachiever, the dumb one with the bad essays, uncompleted homework, and so-called fashionable lateness to every class. On the other hand, James couldn’t dismiss the fact that they had gone through hell together. Hardships had the tendency to bring the unlikeliest people together.

Before the Galran invasion, James never would have believed he could be friends with a girl like Nadia.

Covertly, James glanced between the sleeping Sven and Álvarez’ face on the screen, trying to find any family resemblance. He couldn’t be sure; Sven still had the pudginess of youth around his face that blurred his features. His hair and eyes were pitch black, however, the opposite of Álvarez’ lighter colouring. Furthermore, Keith and Álvarez both shared a narrow, knife jaw, a trait their son surely would have inherited. Sven’s chin was rounded, though of course it could all be because of his age.

He was so engrossed in his contemplation that he didn’t realise the call had ended until Keith poked his knee. He jumped, looking up to see the other raising an eyebrow at him questioningly.

“Movie?” he asked.

“Can I ask you something?”

Keith looked wary. “I suppose.”

“You don’t have to tell me, but, erm, is Álvarez Sven’s father?”

Keith’s eyes widened. He looked honestly taken aback, like this was the most preposterous idea he’d ever heard. “No! Damn it, no!” When Sven grumbled on his chest, he lowered his voice. “Lance and I were never like that.” He narrowed his eyes. “Would it have mattered?”

“No, no! I just… it just seemed… weird? I mean, I know you’ve never liked each other. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be prying.”

Keith sighed. “No, you shouldn’t. Anyway, Lance and I are on good terms now. He’s a friend. Can we finish that movie or do you have more awkward questions to ask?”

James shook his head, hit the play button, and they returned their attention to the movie. Old horror movies were amongst his favourites. He loved the bad special effects, the over-the-top acting, and the shoddy decors. He also liked romance movies, but he’d never, ever admit that to Keith, how he wept at the ending when the couple lived happily ever after.

They laughed when the characters died a cheesy, predictable death, and groaned in unison when the main character did something dumb that got their friends killed. It was nice, sharing a laugh with Keith.

-

They were scheduled to arrive on Mizipra at what would be noon on the planet.

To be honest, James was kind of looking forward to their arrival; the ship might be all kinds of cool, it was still small and cramped. The close quarters made it difficult to move without brushing against one another. He’d bumped his head twice on the overhead console, to Keith’s immense satisfaction. The tiny, cramped closet that passed for a bathroom smelled way too ripe. The incinerator into which they threw their trash worked intermittently. The narrow cot on which they took turns to sleep was uncomfortable even by Garrison standard. And the dry rations were starting to make James want to puke. He’d gotten used to normal meals, and he wondered how Keith managed to survive on that alone without complaining. The worst however was that there was little room to move. They spent most of their time sitting without much to occupy themselves. While Keith kept busy with Sven, he left James to fend for himself. There was only so much reading and so much Tetris that could be done in one day.

Thankfully, the interactive map on the screen indicated they would reach their destination in about four hours. This was cold comfort because James knew the few hours before arrival were usually the longest. It didn’t help that they had absolutely no idea of what they were getting into. They’d discussed a bit what to expect, and none of them was sure. Every information they’d found on Mizipra suggested it was a peaceful planet full of loving aliens. If that were truly the case, Captain Shirogane wouldn’t have disappeared there, wouldn’t he? Unless he’d pulled the moronic stunt of getting off the grid without telling anyone, which didn’t seem like him at all according to Keith.

It was like flying blind, James thought, with only the vaguest idea of the lay of the land. They’d have to depend on themselves with only Ezor and Zethrid for backup. They were all seasoned soldiers, they were all capable, but it was always easier when you knew what you were facing.

“Griffin, eyes up front,” Keith said, pulling him out of his musings. When James looked at him, he pointed at the console. “I’m going to show you how to pilot this.”

James sat straighter. “Seriously?”

“A crash course. I want you to be able to leave Mizipra in case I can’t pilot.”

“Wait, what? You think this will come to this?”

“I don’t know, and I don’t want to take any risks.” Keith’s eyes sharpened and he grabbed James’ arm in a bruising grip. “If the shit hit the fan, you have to put Sven first. Screw the mission, screw me, screw Shiro. I’ll deal with him. You _must_ swear that you’ll take Sven back to Earth.”

The intensity in Keith’s eyes made James flinch. He couldn’t look away. He tried swallowing around the knot in his throat. Keith wasn’t being a doomsayer, he was being careful. He was covering all angles, planning ahead.

“Yeah, I’ll bring the boy back,” James managed. “I’m sure it won’t come to that, though.”

“Don’t be naïve,” Keith scoffed, releasing his arm. “You’re like me, you know there’s something Iverson isn’t telling us, and it cannot be good. Anyway. Now, look here, I’ll show you.”

And Keith did show him, which switch to flick first and what dial not to touch. It was all very instinctive, James thought while trying not to miss anything. Although the ship wasn’t sentient the way the Lions of Voltron or the Atlas were, its technology made it capable to learn and decipher patterns. Keith showed him how to access the database of coordinates already preprogrammed in the ship’s computer; Earth’s coordinates being the last ones of a long, long list. He instructed him on how to send a distress signal or how to open a hailing frequency. Keith’s ship was recognized as belonging to the Blade of Marmora; James could send a distress signal and any Blade close enough to receive it would come to his aid.

The piloting in itself wasn’t that difficult. They switched seats and James had to take a moment to appreciate the view from here. The controls were different from his jet, but they did respond in a similar fashion. There was nothing complicated about piloting—it wasn’t different from driving, just at a much higher speed. The ship responded like a dream to the merest twitch of his wrists. On the co-pilot seat, Keith sat at ease, not looking tensed or scared.

There was trust in his demeanour, trust in what he’d been saying for a while. If anything happened to him, he trusted James to get his son to safety. Whether it was because James was available and more likely to be with him than Ezor or Zethrid, he couldn’t tell. Whatever the reason, it made him swell with stupid pride.

The trouble was that he wasn’t sure he’d be able to abandon Keith. Feelings or not, James didn’t leave his friends behind. He fervently hoped he didn’t have to make that decision, or he’d be torn between doing his duty and following his conscience.

Life had been easier when he’d blindly followed the rules without questioning them.

Which brought him to ask: “Who’s the mission controller?”

“I am.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m the leader of the Blade of Marmora, which means I’m more accustomed than you to lead. I’m calling the shots.”

James pressed his lips together in annoyance. “I’ve lead plenty of missions too.”

“Not of this kind,” Keith retorted in exasperation. “Everything you’ve done has always been military-precise and straight. You probably can’t take a step without Iverson ordering you to. We’re going in blind here. We need someone who’s accustomed to this.”

It was true, but damn did it rankle with his pride. He’d always been the leader, never the follower. He gritted his teeth, doing his best to convince himself this was necessary. Keith wasn’t wrong—James had very rarely been on a mission that hadn’t been mapped and planned to the tiniest detail. He’d always known his objective, where the enemies would be, where the backups would be. Even on recon missions he’d had some idea of what he was getting into.

“I don’t like this.”

“Stupid alpha pride.”

James’ eyes widened. “What?! This had nothing to do with it! I’m simply not a follower by nature! Honestly, I really don’t approve the idea of handing you the reins. I’m afraid you’ll let your emotions get the best of you. We both know you can be a tad reckless when it comes to Captain Shirogane.”

Keith opened his mouth to argue. Closed it. His eyes glittered with suppressed annoyance. “Okay, I get it, you don’t like this. You don’t have to like it to do it, though. You know I’m right, I can tell.”

And he was right, damn him. James scoffed. “Fine, whatever. You can be mission controller—don’t be surprised if there’s a mutiny and I take control though.”

“Good.”

“Good.

“And get off the pilot seat. We’re nearing Mizipra.”

The map showed they were about an hour off. James rolled his eyes and they switched seats again. Sven, who’d apparently been listening to the argument, went to his dad, asking to be picked up. Keith obliged. James refused to be mollified by the cute picture they presented.

Stupid Kogane and his stupid damn ego. Sure, he was a more experienced leader, that didn’t mean he had to shove it in James’ face. They were off to a great start; they hadn’t even touched ground yet that they were already arguing. He sank in his seat. He wasn’t sulking. He was just annoyed. He hated how being with Keith was both fun and exasperating. They always had to argue about everything, sometimes over the most trivial stuff: don’t touch this, don’t talk about that, don’t leave your boots there, lock the bathroom door, don’t lock the bathroom door, don’t put your water bottle under the seat, don’t put it on the console, don’t let Sven play with it.

“This is going to be hell, isn’t it,” he grumbled.

Keith slanted him a look. “Yeah. We’ll manage, though. Sharing a room with you cannot be worse than sharing a room with Allura and Pidge.” At James’ questioning silence, he elaborated: “We were on a diplomatic mission on a small, industrial planet. There was very little comfort to be had, so we were forced to room together. Shiro and Lance shared a room with Hunk, and I shared a room with Allura and Pidge. The Alteans don’t have secondary genders, you see? Allura was at first dismayed that a guy would room with Pidge and her, so we had to explain to her about secondary genders. You can’t imagine how awkward it was. Allura is—was—a smart woman because she questioned everything. Like, _everything_. She wanted to know how our anatomy worked. The trouble is that Pidge is exactly the same. I’ll leave you to imagine how the conversation went on. Needless to say, it’s a good thing I’m not shy.”

James narrowed his eyes. “You’re saying it’ll be easier to share a room with me because I won’t babble on for hours about embarrassing stuff?”

“Basically.” Keith snorted, sounding both amused and fond. “Try explaining a heat or a rut to someone who’s never heard about that. Allura’s face was priceless. I swear the first thing she did the next morning was to ask Shiro if everything Pidge had told her was true.”

“You really miss her, don’t you?”

“Allura? Yeah, every day. It’s like when you lose a limb, you know? You know it’s gone, yet somehow, you still feel its presence.” His face coloured somewhat. “I kind of feel her around us. Lance says her spirit remains with us. I don’t know.”

“But she’s… dead?”

Keith remained quiet for a long moment. He shook his head. “I don’t know. I… don’t think so. It’s hard to explain, really. I’m sure she’s alive somewhere. Perhaps in another universe or in another timeline. Lance’s convinced of it. He’s sear—” He stopped, clearing his throat. “Never mind.”

 _Lance’s searching for her_ was what Keith refused to say out loud. James nodded silently. Although he hadn’t known the Princess of Altea well, she had appeared to be a resourceful, marvelous young woman. After hearing of all her deeds with the Altean alchemy, it wouldn’t be that much surprising that she’d learned to cheat death too.

Now that Keith looked to be in a better mood, James tried to tease him a little. “How did you explain to her what a heat and a rut were?”

Keith scowled. “Pidge explained it all!”

“She’s a beta, she couldn’t have known how it feels. Knowing her, she rambled for hours about the mechanics of the thing.”

“Sure, that’s what she did. What’s more to explain anyway? It’s only the urge to mate. She understood well-enough.”

Uh, but it’s more than simply the urge to mate, James wanted to say. It went deeper. It was a fever that boiled the brain, that overtook the whole body.

“Your, erm, your heat, it won’t be a problem while we’re there, won’t it?” James asked, refusing to look at Keith.

“No, it won’t. I’m clear for the next three months.”

“You don’t take suppressants?!”

“Jeez, why the hell are you this nosy? The Galras don’t believe in suppressants, and I think it’s fine! They’re so disciplined that they just won’t jump you if you’re in heat! They aren't like humans!”

James had no idea what to answer to that. If this was the truth, the Galras were indeed far more disciplined than humans. Smelling an omega in heat was a near-physical tugging. It rendered every alpha in the vicinity crazy. This was why the Garrison made sure every alpha and every omega suppressed. Though not very healthy in the long run, it did make for a smoother running of the place. Crap, he didn’t want to imagine what would have happened if supressing hadn’t been compulsory; it would have been a perpetual orgy while the betas looked on in confusion.

“No more about this,” Keith cut. “It’s not pertinent. You take your suppressants and you leave me to deal with my heats, which won’t be a problem. Should the mission last more than three months, we’ll reassess.”

“Yes, please, no more,” James groaned, rubbing his hands over his face.

“What’s a heat, dada?” Sven asked, looking up towards his father.

“Urgh, I’ll tell you when you are older, baby.”

Sven pulled a face that made it clear he didn’t appreciate this kind of answer.

The conversation was mercifully put to the side.

Through the screen, they finally got their first view of Mizipra. Of spherical shape, it didn’t look much different from Earth. There were a few moons and other celestial bodies orbiting around it. The two weak suns that warmed it and its neighbouring planets were a good distance away. The other planets were, according to reports, not currently inhabited. Their environment was inhospitable.

Despite the distance, the rosy hue of the water could be distinguished against the black of the empty space.

They were within hailing distance. A warning popped up on the screen, telling them they were being hailed from planet Mizipra. Keith gave James a reckless grin and accepted the transmission.

“ _Hailing unknown ship S17-445 in sector 3. This is Mizipra. We request that you identify yourself._ ”

“Mizipra, this is Keith Kogane from Earth piloting ship S17-445. Request permission to land.”

 _“Please, state authorization number._ ”

Keith scrambled to take out his phone. “Authorization number 345B3249-A.”

There was a short silence. They exchanged a look. James saw his own nervousness reflected in Keith’s eyes. If they couldn’t even land, their mission was doomed.

“ _Attention ship S17-445, permission to land granted. Direct your craft to hangar number 87D. Exact coordinates sent. Enjoy your stay._ ”

A 2D map of the landing ground appeared on one side of the central screen. A bright red arrow pointed to the hangar they were supposed to dock at.

Keith got up and took Sven back to his seat. He strapped the boy in securely the same way he’d done upon their departure from Earth. Sven was kicking his legs enthusiastically. Keith had explained to him that they were going on vacation on a cool planet. He, of course, hadn’t mentioned the reason _why_ they were going on vacation on this particular planet. Sven took it all in stride. To him, it was merely another adventure to go on to, another planet to visit with his father.

“Ready?” Keith asked once he’d resumed his seat. He removed the autopilot. “Once we land, we’re a couple. Don’t forget.”

Had they been uttered in other circumstances, those words would have been music to James’ ears. He took in a deep breath, putting himself in a good mindset. Right, they were a couple. No problem there.

“Have you ever been in a couple?” James asked suddenly.

“No.”

“You’ll have to follow my lead, then.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Once again, thank you so much for all your nice comments! They are very appreciated!
> 
>  
> 
> **Please note that Chlorine will be going on a hiatus of undetermined length. I am utterly dissatisfied with how the story is progressing. I find it boring, tedious, stale, and the plot is overused. I therefore wish to distance myself from it in the hope of regaining interest in it. Whether I choose to abandon the story or finish it, there are still fourteen chapters already written that will eventually be posted. For that reason, I won't be answering any comments left on this chapter. Thank you to everybody who's been reading and commenting so far. Thanks for your understanding.**

James noticed the colours first. He blinked, unsure whether his eyes were playing tricks on him. The world appeared dim, as though being seen through heavily-tinted sunglasses. He stood there beside the ship, looking around. The ground beneath his feet was solid. The sky overhead had a purplish hue to it. The clouds were red-rimmed. On the horizon, the twin suns remained unmoving—the planet and they rotated all at the same speed, meaning that the sun never set. It was a perpetual twilight.

They stood there for a moment, taking in their surroundings. Except for the colours, the place looked disappointingly ordinary. Hundreds of various crafts were parked in their berth beside a large hangar. The tarmac beneath their feet could have been plain old asphalt. The hangar itself had an odd shape, more conical than rectangular, but it could have been built of bricks. If green bricks existed, that was.

There were other people milling about too, presumably folks who’d just arrived. James observed them, fascinated by all their different forms, colourings, and garments. Identifying them from his readings on other planets proved difficult. He thought he might have spotted a few Dosians with their hairless head and a group over there appeared to be distant cousins to the Olkarians. There definitely was no fellow human beings.

Curious, the aliens were glancing in their direction too. A lot of them were a pair, quite a few others were in fours or fives. Whether they were families or couples with more than two partners, he couldn’t tell.

Everybody turned their attention towards the hangar when the large doors slid open smoothly. A new group made their way on the tarmac. Judging by their appearance, James guessed them to be their hosts, the Miziprans. They were a tall people, the smallest of them a full head taller than him. They had a head, a neck, and the rest of their body was covered by colourful, diaphanous sheets. They appeared to be gliding rather than walking. Everything about them was a tangle of pastel, soft colours, pleasing to the eye. It was difficult to tell whether the colours meant anything at this point. Their garments hung loose enough that James couldn’t begin to guess what their body beneath might look like.

Perhaps the sheets were their body? Perhaps they had no limbs?

Once they grew near enough, he could see the details of their face. Their features were fine, delicate, ethereal, more guessed at than actually seen. Their eyes (four of them) were large without being bulbous. They had no discernable mouth, nose, or ears. They had a brow ridge that was accentuated by a line darker than their skin tone.

Watching them approach was like watching the spill of pastel-coloured paint. James was transfixed, both by the sight and smell of the Miziprans. They brought with them unknown scents, some spicy, some sweet, none of them acrid. None of their smells was overpowering. James couldn’t tell, with any of his senses, which ones were alphas and which ones were omegas. He could tell which Mizipran was bonded to which by the way they moved together. Their… gliding or sliding appeared to be perfectly in sync. It was beautiful to watch.

Remembering his place, James took Keith’s hand in his. They were supposed to be a couple and human couples held hands. Keith’s muscles bunched before relaxing. Unthinkingly, James rubbed his thumb on the inside of Keith’s wrist in an attempt to sooth him. Although the fabric of his fingerless gloves made a barrier between their skin, tension nonetheless leaked out of Keith’s body. He hugged Sven tighter to him.

The Miziprans separated into various groups to meet all the newcomers. Two of them approached James and Keith.

“Welcome to Mizipra,” the one on the left murmured, voice melodious. Their skin was the colour of blue cotton candy and their eyes were a deep shade of green. “My name is Assmiya and this is my mate, Assilsa. We will be your hosts for the duration of your stay on our planet. Before we begin, may you please give us your reservation number?”

“345B3249-A,” Keith rattled out, totally unflappable.

“Yes. You are from Earth. Keith Kogane, James Griffin, and Sven Kogane.”

James nodded. “Yes.”

“Very well. All is in order. You may lock your vessel and follow us.”

Assmiya seemed to be the one who would be doing the talking. Their mate Assilsa was content to follow. Both of them oozed serenity in a way that was frankly a bit creepy. James exchanged a look with Keith, shrugged, and they followed. He made sure to keep his fingers intertwined with the other’s, hoping the gesture looked natural. Since the Miziprans had no real distinctive facial features, reading their expression was almost impossible. He couldn’t tell whether they believed this charade.

They entered the hangar that happened to be a sort of reception area. It was huge and airy, the ceiling vaulting high. Everything was, once again, of pale colour. The lights were dim, leaving purple shadows lurking in the corners. A few other Miziprans milled about alongside aliens from diverse planets. Entering from another door were Ezor and Zethrid, also accompanied by a couple of Miziprans. James caught Ezor’s eye. They didn’t acknowledge each other. They hadn’t even hailed each other in space in case their communication was intercepted. They had to make sure nobody discovered they were acquainted.

Assmiya pulled them towards a long, high counter made of soft, orange wood. They plucked three objects from atop it that they handed to James and Keith.

“Those bracelets will give you access to your allocated space. Please, mind their colour. If they turn brown, it means you might have stepped into a restricted area.”

“Restricted areas, eh?” James asked, wrapping the bracelet around his left wrist.

It looked to be made of fabric that hardened somewhat on contact with his skin. It glowed a gentle hue that reminded him of the Altean blue.

“Yes. Some areas are restricted for the safety of our guests. For example, you would not be allowed into the feeding rooms belonging to a Type C guest. Whatever you’d find in there would be poisonous to you. Humans are Type F.”

It made sense.

Since Keith had one arm busy holding Sven and his bag, James helped him with the bracelet. He made his gestures casual, pretending this was something he did every day. Keith’s pulse thrummed beneath his fingers.

“The bracelet will also keep the young one from wandering into parts of the compound that could be dangerous to one his age.” Assmiya paused. “Him is the right pronoun for the child, I hope? I do apologize, we do not use such pronouns here.”

“That’s right,” Keith said with a nodded. “You can use _he_ for the three of us.”

The line above Assimya’s four eyes climbed up their smooth forehead. “I do appreciate the clarification. We wish only to be welcoming and cordial.”

“It’s fine.”

“This information is duly noted.” They handed them, of all things, a few thin clay tablets. “This is an informational pamphlet of all the activities you can find on the compound. This is a language you can read? Yes, marvelous. You will also find a map of the area, a list of interesting spots to visit, and the rules by which you accept to behave during your stay. As you will realise, we on Mizipra pride ourselves on our ancestral way of living. You will find little of the technology you know outside of your rooms. Everything you touch, eat, feel, and smell has been carefully handcrafted.” They touched the counter. “This magnificent piece here was indeed carved by one of my ancestors.” They gestured at the cavernous hangar. “This place here is our information centre. You will always find a handful of Miziprans ready to assist you. Don’t hesitate to visit if you have any questions or concerns. Now, follow us, we will show you to your quarters.”

Everything looked pretty legit so far. James kept his eyes roaming around, peering into the shadowed corners of the hangars. Nothing appeared out of place. It was weird, but he sensed no immediate danger. In fact, it was quite the opposite. The tension that had squeezed his body ever since they’d left Earth had dissipated. It was all… peaceful. No bright colours, no loud sounds, nothing grating at his senses. Even holding Keith’s hand in such a setting felt ordinary, normal. He could tell Keith had also relaxed. Sven was drifting off against his father’s shoulder, eyes drooping, one thumb popped into his mouth.

They stepped outside once more. There sprawled a sort of rustic-looking village. It went on for miles. Narrow paths of dirt crisscrossed the gently undulating ground covered in a sort of blueish grass. Aliens were strutting under the tall trees of various colours and shapes. In the distance came the sound of waves crashing against the shore. The forever setting suns shone through the canopy of multi-coloured leaves.

In his childhood, James had once gone down with a fever. For a full night, he’d been delirious, his brain boiling inside his skull. His dreams had been confusing and terrifying and nightmarish. They had been full of garish colours, not unlike the maelstrom of different shades that went on wherever he set his eyes. It was unsettling, though thankfully not scary. It would certainly take some getting used to.

Assmiya kept on talking with that soft, sweet voice while they followed a path. Looking around, James felt like he was watching a movie from the old world, from before the Third World War. He saw no electronics, no flashing screens, no holoscreen, no telly, nothing. The placards that named the paths were made of the same strange wood as the counter in the hangar. The writings made no sense—it was more cuneiforms than the letters of the alphabet he had learned.

The buildings themselves were either small huts or a cluster of such huts built one atop the other to form a sort of tenement. Built either of wood or the local yellowish stone, they had a prehistoric look to them. Larger buildings were, according to their guide, restaurants, gyms, theatres, indoor swimming pools, and other such amenities. Assmiya explained that the aliens visiting Mizipra were put into different categories according to their needs. For example, the Type F group, of which humans were a part, was made of aliens that shared common traits with humans. Their eating habits were similar, they needed clean water, they required their garments laundered, their young would need to be looked after unlike the offspring of other species. This way, it minimized the chances of unpleasantness.

You wouldn’t want to be in the area reserved for the Type A aliens who ate unsupervised children, Assmiya said with a trace of humour.

Was that what had happened to Captain Shirogane? Had he wandered into a corded off area and had ended up the supper of some weird alien? Unlikely.

Commander Iverson would have a stroke trying to hide this information from the public.

The compound where they found themselves was perfectly safe for both children and parents. The aliens of Type F were friendly and enjoyed mingling with each other. It could be navigated on foot or by taking one of the shuttles that roamed the paths. There was no precise schedule to follow. The Mizipran’ way of counting the hours differed from the way they did it on Earth. Minutes were much longer. It was all explained in their brochure, anyway. All they had to keep in mind was that some restaurants and other attractions had opening and closing hours.

They reached a small hut situated under a copse of trees coniferous in appearance. This habitation was made of pale yellow stone. A symbol was stenciled above the sliding door, impossible to decipher. James still committed it to memory in case this might be a sort of civic number.

The interior of every hut was made to fit a particular species of alien. Inside, James was surprised to see a large room that was disconcertingly… similar to Earth. The pale, soft colours notwithstanding, he would have thought he’d just stepped into his parents’ living room. Assmiya told them there might be some minor differences from what they were used to, but that they should be able to feel at home nonetheless. Once again, they reiterated their invitation for them to walk back to the information centre if they had any questions or concerns.

Then, with a departing shiver of their ethereal body, they were gone, the door closing softly behind them.

James and Keith remained unmoving, looking around them in a similar state of wonderment. The room in itself was nothing impressive, if one disregarded the fact that it was inside a hut on a planet lightyears away from Earth. It had the appearance of an ordinary living room with a long couch, two large chairs, a coffee table, a small shelf filled with books situated under the window that gave a grand view of the village, and a telly hanging on a wall. The paint was a soft yellow, the carpet was plushy and light blue with odd purplish accents. On the left of the entry door was a kitchenette with a fridge and a round table with four chairs. On the right were three doors that presumably lead to the bedrooms and the bathroom.

This was the place where he’d be spending a lot of time with Keith, James thought while he surveyed it. He hadn’t known what he’d imagined, something more outlandish, more jarring, perhaps. The normalcy of the place was kind of disappointing—he’d been bracing himself to live in alien surroundings.

He shook his head. It didn’t matter. They weren’t here to have fun or to discover new cultures; they had a mission. They needed to sit down and discuss it at lengths. Was it safe to talk about the real reason of their presence, however? He looked around uncertainly—surely the place couldn’t be _bugged_?

Given the fact that the Miziprans were apparently a nosy bunch, James wouldn’t put it past them. They’d excuse the breach of privacy by saying it was for research purposes, perhaps. Whatever the reason, James and Keith had to be careful, or they wouldn’t be able find what had happened to Captain Shirogane. They’d fail the mission. James couldn’t have that.

And he couldn’t just say out loud to Keith that they needed to search the hut for bugs in case there were indeed bugs. Putting the mission before everything else, James went to Keith and wrapped him in an embrace. Keith’s whole body tensed. His eyes widened, and James considered it a small victory that he wasn’t rudely pushed back. Emboldened, heart hammering wildly against his ribs, he cupped the back of Keith’s skull and leaned close until his mouth brushed his ear.

“We need to look for bugs,” he whispered.

Keith remained tense enough that James feared he hadn’t understood the words. Then, he relaxed minutely, nodding.

James told himself he didn’t linger a second more than decency demanded. He told himself he didn’t quite comb his fingers through Keith’s soft black hair, that he didn’t inhale his scent, that he didn’t allow his other hand to stay on Keith’s sweetly rounded hip for a tad too long. Pulling from the embrace was like pulling teeth.

There was nothing in Keith’s expression that indicated he’d noticed the breach of etiquette. He looked determined to find whether the room had been bugged. Carefully, he deposited a sleeping Sven on the couch. He removed his jacket and used it to cover his son, gently pushing back choppy hair from his forehead.

The gesture was so natural it made something ache in James’ chest. He both hated and loved watching Keith interacting with his son. He had trouble reconciliating this gentle, loving man to the little brute he’d known in school. What had changed in ten years? Was it having a child? Was it that Keith had found his place in the world and was finally at peace with it? Or, more disconcertingly, had Keith always been this nice, that James had simply never been privy to it before?

He turned from the tooth-rotting sweetness of it all, blinking.

Focus, damn it, he berated himself. He was stronger than that.

He took his phone out and activated the homemade app Ina had come up with during the invasion. By using some sort of electromagnetic pulse, it could detect all other electronics in the vicinity. It had been more than useful all those times they’d walked into the city and had to skirt drones and Galra patrols. With that device, they had been able to pinpoint almost to the centimetre the exact location of enemy positions.

It had taken a lot of deaths and wounds to get it to work properly.

Keith looked a bit impressed. He came to stand by his elbow, looking down at the screen of the phone. A rough layout of the hut appeared. The electronic devices shone in a bright white colour. James compared what was on the screen to what he saw around him: the telly, a tablet on the coffee table. There was also a telly in each of the bedrooms alongside something else he couldn’t identify. Other than that, there appeared to be no other electronics. Of course, it was entirely possible that the Mizipran technology was so different from the Galran and human one that the app wouldn’t pick it up. They’d still have to do a manual sweep of the place, just to be sure.

They went about it quietly, pretending to look around while they glanced behind furniture and into ventilation shafts. Except for some multi-coloured dust, James found nothing worrying. Either the Miziprans were truly masters at hiding stuff, or it had never crossed their mind to actually _spy_ on their guests.

He checked the master bedroom thoroughly nonetheless. It was quite large, with a big bed, a desk of drawers, two nightstands, a telly, a wardrobe, a table with a chair, and a window giving a pretty view of the rest of the village. It was cozy enough, though anything was cozy compared to a room at the Garrison. James tried not to look at the bed too much, mind going wild at the thought that he’d have to share it with Keith. It was large enough that they wouldn’t have to touch, large enough to put a pillow between their two bodies to avoid unpleasantness. This wasn’t what James wanted, but he doubted very much Keith would want to take the risk.

The second bedroom was clearly made for a child: it had one narrow single bed and childish patterns of weird-looking animals plastered on the walls. The window here was high, too high for a toddler to reach even if he climbed on the furniture. Smart.

“Everything looks clean,” he told Keith once they’d swept the whole place.

“Yeah.”

“What do you want to do now?”

“I’ll put Sven to bed, it’s far past naptime. Then, I don’t know. How about we read that pamphlet Assmiya gave us? We could try pinpointing the places Shiro had visited.”

It was all sensible. Keith put Sven to bed, apparently unworried that his son would be afraid to wake up in a foreign bed. In the meanwhile, James took their bags to their bedroom. He unpacked his own stuff, putting it all neatly in his side of the drawers. At the bottom of his bag was a blaster. He’d brought it with him, unsure whether he’d have to use it, refusing to leave it behind. He’d feared the Miziprans would inspect their luggage upon their arrival and that awkward questions would be asked. What to do with it now? At the Garrison, he always kept it within reach, especially at night—old habits did die hard. Here, he couldn’t just let it lie around in case Sven decided to inspect it. Instead of putting it under his pillow, he put it away in the nightstand he’d claimed as his own.

“Wait,” Keith said, startling him. “I want to sleep on this side.”

James threw him an exasperated look. “Why?”

“I want my back to be against the wall.”

“What of _my_ back?”

Keith shrugged. “I don’t care. The baby cam’s on my side anyway. I need to be able to keep an eye on Sven.”

What James had thought to be an alarm clock ended up being a small monitor that, when turned on, gave an aerial view of the nursery. This had been the weird white dot on the app.

It was a good argument.

“You don’t mind the blaster?” James asked, a bit embarrassed. He put it in the other nightstand.

“As long as you don’t mind the knife. It stays under my pillow.”

“It’s fine.”

Keith sat on the bed. “It’s going to be awkward, isn’t it?”

“Hm, yes, probably. We’re not used to each other. We’re not used to sleeping with someone else either, I suppose.”

“I’m used to sleeping with Sven. It’s cold in space,” he added the last part almost self-consciously.

“Right. What do you think of the Miziprans so far?”

“Hard to tell. They seem to be a nice bunch. I kind of expected them to ask weird questions about babies and stuff.” Keith waved the pamphlet they’d been given at their arrival. “It says in here that we can answer surveys about our species’… mating habits, if we feel comfortable enough. For science and stuff.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. There are a bunch of questionnaires on the tablet in the living room.”

“Ah. I’ll leave them to you, then.”

“Why?”

James threw him a puzzled look. “Because you’re the one with a kid, numbskull.”

“Yeah, sure, because you probably never did the thing that makes kids.”

Keith continued to talk while he browsed the pamphlet, but James hardly heard him. His face felt hot. Bantering with Keith was dangerous. They didn’t know each other. They could be poking at sore spots without knowing it, the way Keith had done. It hadn’t been mean, yet James couldn’t stop the hurt from spreading. It was like an old wound that refused to heal. Every time he thought he’d grown desensitized, something happened to remind him that the pain still lurked beneath, ready to come to the forefront with one careless word.

“James? You listening?”

He blinked, turning his attention to Keith who was looking at him with an eyebrow raised. “What? Oh, sorry, you were saying?”

“Look, you can say that you’re not interested in the mission. I don’t mind looking for Shiro on my own. Clearly, it’s me Iverson wanted to send here, you’re only collateral damage. If you can’t get your head in the game, just say so right away.”

James’ eyes widened. “Excuse me? You think I don’t want to do my duty simply because I zoned out for a second?”

“No.” Keith got to his feet with an exasperated sigh. “It’s not only that! You’ve been against this since the beginning. You’re never thinking straight. And you’ve said it; it’s nothing more than duty to you. I don’t need a dutiful soldier, Griffin, I need someone who won’t leave any pebble unturned to find Shiro! That’s why I wanted Lance to come with me.”

This was unfair. James had no idea how to answer. This wasn’t even true; he did want to find Captain Shirogane. What did it matter that he was looking for him out of duty rather than out of misplaced love?

“I think a dutiful solider is exactly what you need, Kogane,” James retorted, getting up too. “You need someone who’ll keep a cool head and won’t let their feelings get in the way.”

“Then act like you actually want to help!”

“Okay, okay, sorry, it’s true, I kind of zoned out for a second! Calm down, take a deep breath, and let’s start over, all right?”

Keith looked to want to continue arguing. He gritted his teeth, eyes mistrustful. Then, he heaved out a weary sigh. “Fine, whatever. I was saying that we should scout the hut where Shiro and Curtains stayed first.”

“His name is Curtis Miller, Keith. Get it right.”

“I’ll call him whatever I want!”

The thrumming at the back of his skull indicated an upcoming headache. James closed his eyes briefly, trying to find it himself to be patient. He had forgotten how aggravating dealing with Keith and his childish crush on Shirogane could be.

“Fine, be a baby and resort to name-calling, I don’t care, though you’re proving to me exactly why I’m needed on this mission.” He lowered his voice and said accusingly: “If they are in danger, can I count on you to save them both, or will you let Lieutenant Miller die?”

The flash in Keith’s eyes answered the question: he wouldn’t let Shirogane’s fiancé die, but he wouldn’t save him out the kindness of his heart.

“No, I won’t,” Keith answered angrily. “I’m not evil.”

“Well then, at least we got that settled. And yes, I think scouting the hut where they stayed could be a good idea. It’s probably around here somewhere. I think I recall the captain sending a description of the surroundings of the hut. If it’s not inhabited at the moment, maybe we’ll even be able to look around inside.”

“Good.” Keith sat back on the bed, picking up the pamphlet. “How about you fetch us some food, now? I’m famished.”

“Say please and I’ll go.”

Keith looked up from the pamphlet. Their eyes met. James refused to budge, refused to be swayed. He knew Keith wasn’t this demanding, that he was merely testing the waters. He wanted to see how much he could push until James decided to push back. James had to put his foot down or they’d spend their whole time here fighting for dominance. It wasn’t even an alpha and omega thing, not this time. It was a question of respect. James was willing to respect Keith if Keith respected him in exchange.

“Can you _please_ fetch some food? I’d rather stay to keep an eye on Sven.”

Well, this was a nice surprise. James had expected Keith to adamantly refuse to be polite in the wording of his request. There was no reason to say no.

“All right. I’ve no idea of the type of food they have here, so you’ll have to put up with whatever I bring back.”

“James, I’ve travelled the length and breadth of the universe. I’ve visited hundreds of weird planets. I’m sure I’ll live.”

James nodded and left the hut.

The change between the Earth-like setting of their living quarters and the alien landscape of the village gave him pause. He stopped on the threshold, taking in a deep breath of clean air. He hadn’t noticed it, how Keith’s omega scent had been cloying inside, thick enough to stick to the back of his throat. By the time they left, James’ whole gear would be smelling of him, a sweet torture he wouldn’t want to get rid of.

He looked at the map Assmiya had given them, trying to orient himself. He wished their guides had given them more explanation about the way things worked. Was he supposed to pay for the food, or was it included in the price of their sojourn? Well, he’d have to find out.

He found a symbol on the map that reminded him of food, so he decided to try this place first. As he walked, he kept his eyes peeled, taking in every detail. He had a good photographic memory, which meant he’d be able to include it all in his report. Commander Iverson would want to know the layout of the place. James tried to picture Captain Shirogane and his fiancé strolling down those same paths. The relaxed setting made it difficult. The captain didn’t appear to be a relaxed person. Laidback, yes, but always on edge, always poised for action. The place didn’t fit him. Maybe this was why he’d chosen it in the first place. Who knew?

The path lead him past many other huts similar to the one he shared with Keith. They were all of similar sizes, except for those clustered together to form tenements. Their colours varied for some reason he couldn’t fathom. The blue grass that grew around the paths was lush, thick. The leaves in the trees were glossy, hanging down in gentle arcs, pruned to perfection. There were colourful flowers in the bushes. The small pebbles seemed to shine under the weak light of the twin suns.

His footsteps slowed. Peace engulfed him like a warm blanket. The paradisiacal aura of the place reminded him of his youth, when he’d go to his aunt’s beach house a few hours away from the city. The air had the same salty tang to it that reminded him of the ocean. He’d always liked large bodies of water and the feel of fine sand under his naked toes. For once, the memories had no bitter tinge to them.

Holy shit, this place really had a cathartic effect. If he weren’t careful, he’d sit down and wile the days away until he completely forgot about his mission. Perhaps this was what had happened to the captain: he’d just sat down somewhere and totally forgot about the Garrison and his duties back on Earth.

He reached his destination an unknown length of time later. With the suns unmoving on the horizon, it was impossible to measure the passage of time. To his great relief, he saw that other aliens were looking as relaxed and dazed as he was feeling.

Different species of different appearances were drifting here and there, talking in low voices. Most were accompanied by at least another person. A few were, like James, on their own. Amicable chatter in languages he could never hope to understand reached his ears. Nods were exchanged, or what passed for nods. James sensed no enmity coming from any of these aliens. Everybody looked utterly content.

His destination was a large, non-descript building. Although properly identified in the cuneiform alphabet of the Mizipran, it didn’t take a linguist to understand the purpose of the place: one merely had to trust their nose. James’ stomach grumbled traitorously the second he caught a whiff of something edible. The dry rations he’d lived on for the past two days felt even less appetizing in the face of real food. He walked through the open doors of the place.

There was indeed food aplenty inside, but this wasn’t what caught James’ attention. He spotted familiar orange skin and, when he got closer, he recognized the tall, lean form of Ezor. The woman held a huge tray piled high with all kinds of colourful stuff. Apparently still unsatisfied with her choices, she was looking hungrily at an array of what seemed to be cakes.

James took a tray and walked nonchalantly to her. Zethrid was nowhere in sight, so he concluded Ezor had to be fetching food for the both of them. At least these two women had the order of things correct; it was the omega’s job to take care of the nourishment of the family—Keith should be the one here.

Except this was damn backward thinking, and James berated himself for jumping readily on it.

Ezor spotted his approach. She turned and smiled at him over her shoulder. James made to look at the assortment of weird cakes.

“How are things?” he asked.

“Fine. You settling with the boss?”

“The boss really is bossy,” he said wryly.

She laughed, sounding delighted. “I know, right? Don’t worry, he doesn’t mean it in a bad way. That’s simply how he is. Oh! Look at the colour on that cake! It’s the one I want!”

The Mizipran manning the counter approached after she’d waved at them and handed her a large plate of the greenish pastry. Licking her lips in anticipation, she put it atop the pile on her tray.

While the Mizipran drifting away to serve another customer, Ezor said in a low voice: “We’re staying at a charmingly tiny hut on the road south of the information centre. There’s a huge, red tree beside it. The symbol above the door resembles a turd.”

James snorted, trying to hide his chuckle. “Nice,” he commented. “We’re staying on the north road, in a copse of trees. The symbol above the door looks to be a… a cow with eight legs, I guess? And two tails?”

“Oh, a _filiel_! It’s big enough to eat people, but it’s super affectionate.” She grinned toothily. “A bit like the boss! He bites and he hisses, but he settles down easily enough when you know how to handle him. A bit like uh… what’s that animal you have on Earth… that goes _meow_?”

“A cat?”

“Yes, yes a cat! The boss is a cat! Careful how you pet him or you’ll end up with your face torn to shreds!” Ezor leaned in, lowering her voice to a playful whisper: “Handle him right, and he’ll be rubbing against you and purring in no time.” She burst into laughter at his expression. “Ah! You’re too easy to tease, Jamie! I’ll see you around!”

By the time he had regained some of his wits, she’d vanished, leaving him flustered.

A cat. She’d compared Keith to a cat.

How apt.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He sat on the couch, willing himself to think of something else. Seriously, he couldn’t get worked up every time Keith did something. To occupy his mind, he picked up the dirty dishes, putting them on the tray to be carried back to whence they came from tomorrow. There was no sink or dishwasher in the hut, so James supposed they weren’t supposed to do their dishes themselves.
> 
> A loud thud followed by a shriek raised all the hairs on his body. He stood up right, eyes huge, listening.
> 
> “Griffin! For fuck’s sake, come here!”
> 
> Another thud followed by some colourful swearing. James didn’t think—he let the tray fall from his hands onto the carpet and bolted to the bathroom. The door hadn’t been locked. He crashed into the small room, fists raised, ready to fight off any Mizipran peeping at Keith in the shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friends, I believe we are back in the game! I seem to have untangled me from the knot that had been keeping me from working on this fic! In celebration of this, here is chapter 7. Updates will once again happen regularly on Sundays.
> 
> Thank you for sticking with me despite this hiatus!
> 
> Enjoy!

Keith hadn’t been idle during his absence: on his tablet, he’d drawn a map of the compound and highlighted the places Captain Shirogane had visited. He’d added notes on each location, and whether this made sense that the captain would have visited this particular spot. It was all very clear, very un-Keith-like in its neatness.

James hadn’t quite known what kind of food to bring. He hadn’t quite known _what_ the food put on display was, so he’d taken a bit of everything, doing as Ezor had done and heaping it all on his tray. The trek back to the hut had been an exercise in balance that he had passed with flying colours.

He put the tray on the coffee table. Keith pulled his attention away from the tablet to consider the display. He chose a small plate at random and began stuffing his mouth with the lilac-coloured cubes of who-knew-what.

“Is that cake?” he asked suddenly. “They have cake here?”

James shrugged. “Seems that way. I don’t know if it tastes it though.”

Keith snatched the plate. “I’ll put it aside. For Sven.”

“You know you can like cake, right?” James commented, sitting on one of overstuffed chairs. “And you can’t seriously be thinking of giving that to Sven. At least not the full piece.”

Keith pulled a face. “…whatever.”

“I met Ezor at the… cafeteria. She told me Zethrid and she are staying at the hut with the turd-like symbol above the door.”

“Sounds like her.”

Keith returned his attention to the tablet, holding it in one hand and eating with the other. James realized with horror that he had every intention of eating through all the food he’d brought. He took a plate for himself before it all disappeared.

After a while, Sven woke up and met them in the living room. His black hair was mussed and he was rubbing his eyes tiredly. There were rumples in his clothes. His chubby cheeks were reddened by sleep. Keith put the tablet away to sit Sven on his knee and help him eat from one of the bowls of soft food. Sven looked too tired to protest the odd mixtures. He ate without complaining much.

“Isn’t he old enough to feed himself?” James asked curiously.

“Yeah, but there isn’t highchair to sit him into.”

“So you have it all on your ship? All the right… equipment for a child?”

Keith frowned at the question. “Yes, of course. I don’t spoil him all the time by letting him sit on me.”

“It’s… weird to imagine a kid growing up amongst the Blade of Marmora.”

“Yeah, well, when Emperor Zarkon was still alive, it would have been unthinkable to have children in our midst. Now that we’re a humanitarian group, it’s fine. I certainly wouldn’t have had Sven if I’d thought he’d be in any danger.”

“You’re a good dad,” James blurted out.

“You sound surprised.”

“It’s just… I remember how you were back then, and I’d never imagined you with kids.”

Not even my kids, he didn’t say out loud.

Usually, when omegas first presented, every alpha in the vicinity sniffed after them with interest. It had been the opposite with Keith. James remembered it like it was yesterday, the realisation that the dirty little spitfire seated by the window was an omega. There had been nothing pleasant in his smell, only acridness and sourness and bitterness. Keith hadn’t been desirable. James had gotten one whiff of him before discarding him as a potential mate entirely. Keith had been scrawny, dirty, angry, the exact opposite of a desirable mate.

Things had changed after they’d joined the Garrison. Keith’s moods had evened out a bit. With Captain Shirogane’s influence, he’d calmed down. His scent had sweetened, barely hampered by the scent blockers every cadet had to use. Three meals a day and the obligatory shower every morning had turned him from resembling a drenched cat to a more normal human being. There had been beauty hiding beneath all that grime, and James had been the first to be surprised. Not that Keith would have made a good mate even at that time; he’d still been too angry, his body too angular to be pleasing to the eye.

Appearance notwithstanding, Keith hadn’t had one fatherly bone in his body. He’d been arrogant, selfish, prone to fight at any provocation.

What had changed since then, James couldn’t be sure.

“I’d never imagined myself with kids either,” Keith admitted with a shrug, “but accidents happen.”

Ah, Sven was an accident. James smoothed his face to make sure Keith didn’t read his expression. A pregnancy isn’t an accident; you get pregnant when you sleep with an alpha without protection. What were you expecting to be the result, a telly?

He had the urge to be condescending, to ask whether Keith knew about protection or the morning-after pill or whatever other ways omegas had of dealing with this kind of stuff.

“I can hear you judging me,” Keith said. “You say you’ve known me since we were kids, and that means I know _you_ too, James. I know that you’re arrogant and snobbish and self-righteous, that you’re a stickler for the rules and that you don’t think accidents happen. Well, you’ve never heard of a broken rubber?”

“Is that what happened?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.”

An uneasy silence descended on the living room. Sensing it, Sven looked between the two adults, his black eyes wide with confusion. There was a bit of food stuck to the side of his face and his hands were sticky with it.

James realised it was his fault that things had soured _again_. Why did he have to be such a judgemental asshole? It wasn’t any of his damn business how Sven had been conceived, whether he’d been an accident or the result of carelessness. He was here, and Keith was dealing with him far better than many omegas would with an unwanted child.

“Since it’s getting late, what do you propose we do tomorrow?” he asked, offering an olive branch.

Keith shrugged. “Check out the hut where Shiro stayed first. According to the report he sent Iverson, he didn’t do much on his first day here, mostly looking around the compound.”

“You’re suggesting we follow in his footsteps.”

“Seems the wisest thing to do, unless you have a better idea.”

James winced at the sardonic note in Keith’s voice—the jibe was deserved. “No, it’s fine,” he assured.

Keith threw him an unconvinced look before turning his attention back to his tablet. Sven said something, choosing to speak in Galran as if he were sensing the hostility and wanted to reassure his father.

His appetite fled, James put his empty plate on the coffee table with sigh. He rubbed his forehead, trying to find the strength to apologize. It wasn’t that he disliked apologizing, he just hated being wrong. He was off his game with Keith, left floundering like a young teenager. He didn’t relish this feeling. He wasn’t in control of anything right now. He kept reacting, talking without thinking.

“Look,” Keith said after a while, “you haven’t said anything I haven’t heard before. I don’t give a shit what you think of me or my life choices. Just keep your backward opinions to yourself. You understand this is why I would have preferred Lance to accompany me, right?”

James scoffed. He supposed he understood; Álvarez, for all his faults, didn’t have a judgemental bone in his body.

“Yeah, I understand,” he grumbled. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and looking directly at Keith. “I’ll come clean, Keith, because I want this to work. I was raised thinking that omegas are beneath everybody else, that they are supposed to stay home and take care of the kids. My parents have been hammering this into me since I was old enough to think. They still think that way, by the way. They get all angry whenever I mention there are omegas working at the Garrison. I know it’s no excuse, and I’m trying to change. It’s… difficult to completely change my mindset.”

Keith regarded him for a moment, face impassive. “All right, I understand. I guess you get some points for honesty. I’m not very surprised to hear you were raised that way; you were always such a prick. It goes without saying.”

James smiled blandly, taking the blow with outward equanimity. Inside, he seethed. What a stupid arrogant little shit Keith was! What the hell was wrong with James to have a crush on such an impossible man?

It took him a long while before the flames of anger died down, leaving him exhausted. This would never work. They’d never make this work. It was impossible. There was too much pent up pressure between the two of them, too much hateful history. James had thought he’d matured over the last five years, but apparently, he was still the angry bully he’d been as a teenager. A part of him wanted to get up and punch Keith for daring to talk to him that way—perhaps a good fistfight would clear the air. He couldn’t, though. He wasn’t a savage who used his fists at the slightest provocation.

Taking out his phone, he texted Ryan, hands shaking a bit.

“I’m going out for a walk,” he said, standing up and putting his phone away.

Keith nodded absentmindedly, uncaringly.

The air outside was cooler than the oppressive air inside the hut. James took in a deep breath, trying to calm down. He wasn’t even sure what he was feeling; a mix of anger and annoyance and shame. Keith could push his buttons in a way no one else could. James was usually more even-keeled than that. Banter never got under his skin that way, not even mean-spirited banter. Keith always found the right thing to say at the exact right moment.

He followed the path aimlessly, choosing to follow the sounds of the ocean. It took a long moment before the serene surroundings of Mizipra soothed his ruffled nerves. He concentrated on the colours, the sights, the feel of the small pebbles beneath his boots. He ignored the other people around, not wanting to see how they all looked so blissfully happy while he was utterly miserable.

The path lead to a slight rise. On top of it, James got his first good look of the pink-coloured ocean. The sound of the waves hitting the sandy beach was exactly the same as on Earth. If he closed his eyes, he could imagine himself a young child at his aunt’s beach house, chasing seagulls and collecting seashells. Although his life even back then hadn’t been that easy, it had at least been uncomplicated.

He slid down the gentle slope towards the sand. He took off his boots, his socks, and sighed in relief when his toes finally dug into the fine grains of sand. It was lukewarm and soft like sugar. He got close to the waves without risking getting wet and sat down to think. The horizon stretched without pause on either side of him. The gentle breeze tugged at his hair, sending ripples across the pinkish water. Overhead, the seagulls squawked, flying and plunging in graceful arcs. There were other people enjoying the beach, too far away to be of consequence. James ignored them easily.

Finally, the anger melted completely away, leaving him hollow. He ignored his phone vibrating in his pocket—he could afford to ignore Ryan for just a bit longer. For the moment, he merely wanted to bask in the oddly familiar scents of his childhood summers. He could never get them back—his aunt’s house had been destroyed during the Galra invasion. The whole coastline had been bombarded to become unrecognizable. He’d visited two years ago, and the sight of what had been a warzone had left him desolate. Nothing had been left standing, not even a timber. Even the colour of the ocean had been different—a deep, menacing blue that had reminded him of the sky just before a storm. Growing up, he remembered wishing to bring his own children to that spot, to show them where he’d learned to swim and fish and run, to show them where his love for flying had come from after watching the birds.

It was impossible now, and not only because that whole beautiful place had been destroyed.

He thought of Keith and his son. Would Keith go back to the desert to show Sven where he’d grown up? Had he completely forsaken his human side to dedicate himself to his Galra half? Keith had no attach to Earth anymore. Most of his time spent there had been unhappy. It would make sense he’d want to create better memories with his son elsewhere.

Ten years ago, their positions had been reversed: James had firmly known his place in the world while Keith had been a drifter, a nobody with nothing to call his own. Now that their roles had changed, James was starting to understand why Keith had been such a wild little thing. Cast adrift alone in an uncaring world, he’d protected himself the best way he could. Although the comparison wasn’t quite right since James wasn’t alone; he had his friends and his job, yet he still felt alone in the world: estranged from his parents, no hope for a family of his own, with his job as sole fulfilment. He sucked at relationships and, except for Ryan, Ina, and Nadia, he kept everybody else at a careful distance.

Shit, hadn’t he come here to calm down? He was getting himself worked up again, except this time it was melancholia settling in his chest rather than anger. Between the two, he preferred anger.

He heaved out a long sigh and let himself fall on his back. The colours of the sky above were gorgeous; a mix of dark blue, pinks, mauves, blacks, and yellows. Through the clouds he caught sight of a few small white dots, distant stars he had no name for. The sentiment of vertigo that came with this was welcomed. He embraced it, allowing himself to become completely disoriented. This reminded him of the feeling of freefalling that came with flying. His jet had taken a hit once and he’d plunged to Earth at breakneck speed. For a couple of seconds, the feeling of weightlessness had been intoxicating. Right now at least there was no risk of crashing to the ground.

The squawk of a bird flying overhead pulled him from his light doze. James sat up, blinking blearily. Nothing had changed around him. The same couple was still walking hand in hand a good distance away, which told him he hadn’t been out for too long. He pulled his phone out to see he’d left the hut a good two hours ago already. Ryan had sent him three more texts, inquiring about his wellbeing—the man was way too smart to ask about the mission without being certain they had secure lines.

A wave of affection for his friend made James smile. Truly, without Ryan’s steadfastness, he’d been lost.

He texted him back, saying that everything was fine for the moment. Since he didn’t want to lie, he added that he’d bickered with Keith a few times already, but that he thought they could mend their ways eventually. This was nothing incriminating; couples did argue, especially couples made of two hot-heads.

With one last look at the unchanging ocean, he picked up his boots and returned to the hut. The grass under his naked feet was silky. He had no idea of the time on Mizipra. He guessed it had to be what passed for nighttime since the paths were mostly deserted. There were lights at the windows of many of the small huts. From one hut with all its windows thrown open came the noises of a couple going at it quite enthusiastically.

Living at the Garrison meant living in quarters close enough to hear couples having sex all the time. It only made James smile, until he spotted two shadows standing beside the hut where the noise was coming from. Hidden amongst the gloom thrown by the foliage of nearby trees were two Miziprans visibly eavesdropping. They were nearly invisible, the colours of their skins and garments blending perfectly with the mottled shadows—James had caught them only because years of war had honed all his senses.

This was weird. There were always creeps who liked to peep at others, but these Miziprans didn’t seem to be making a lot of effort to remain hidden. They were merely standing there, listening intently. One of them turned towards James who stood a few feet away, gawking. Realising he’d been caught, he hurried on his way, face red.

That was disconcerting. Was voyeurism commonplace here? The Miziprans were reputed to be a nosy bunch, after all… James guessed he didn’t mind that much if the couple inside the hut knew about it. Otherwise, it was downright creepy.

He made a mental note to lock all windows and close all curtains before going to bed.

Inside the hut, Keith’s smell assaulted him anew. Neither Keith nor his son were anywhere to be seen; James allowed himself a small sniff. The smell reminded him of wood smoke and campfires and the dry wind of the desert. It was uncommon for an omega’s scent to be anything but sweet, but really, Keith smelling of flowers would simply have been out of character. The leader of the Blade of Marmora had no right smelling like a bouquet; anything associated with life in the desert fitted him much better.

James wiped the sand off his naked feet on the welcome mat by the door. He heard Keith’s and Sven’s voices coming from the bathroom, and he guessed they’d be showering before bed. He tried not to imagine it, Keith naked in the shower with water running down his skin, rivulets sliding down his angular jaw and the dips of his collarbones—

He sat on the couch, willing himself to think of something else. Seriously, he couldn’t get worked up every time Keith did something. To occupy his mind, he picked up the dirty dishes, putting them on the tray to be carried back to whence they came from tomorrow. There was no sink or dishwasher in the hut, so James supposed they weren’t supposed to do their dishes themselves.

A loud thud followed by a shriek raised all the hairs on his body. He stood up right, eyes huge, listening.

“Griffin! For fuck’s sake, come here!”

Another thud followed by some colourful swearing. James didn’t think—he let the tray fall from his hands onto the carpet and bolted to the bathroom. The door hadn’t been locked. He crashed into the small room, fists raised, ready to fight off any Mizipran peeping at Keith in the shower.

There was no face at the window. There was no attacker or anything. There was only Keith standing fully dressed in the shower stall. James had to take a second to understand what he was seeing. Keith was on tiptoe, arms extended over his head, holding… the showerhead. Or, no, the showerhead had fallen from its place on the wall and water gushed from the open pipe. It fell on Keith like a waterfall, rapidly filling the bottom of the stall, while he was trying to block it. It was already overflowing unto the floor, its drain unable to siphon it all.

Sven stood on the side, howling with laughter, pointing at his drenched father. Totally unhelpful.

“Griffin!” Keith barked. He sputtered when he swallowed a mouthful of water. “Do something, you moron!”

Face hurting because he couldn’t stop smiling, James picked up the showerhead. He looked at it, realising it hadn’t broken off but had simply become unscrewed. It must have fell after Keith had turned the shower on, pushed by the pressure of the water.

While it was amusing to see Keith getting soaked to the bone, he’d never forgive him for standing there. The problem was getting the showerhead back to its rightful place. Keith was busy trying to stem the water with his hands. The shower stall wasn’t big, too narrow to fit two people comfortably. Technically, he supposed he could tell Keith to move since he wasn’t doing much to stop the water. On the other hand, doing so meant James would be the one getting drenched, and he didn’t want that.

He stepped into the stall next to Keith, ankle-deep in warm water. They were pressed shoulder to shoulder. James tried not to focus on that while he extended his arms and attempted to screw the showerhead back into place. Whenever Keith moved his hands, he got his face full of water and, soon, he was as wet as the other. The slippery metal slipped in his fingers, making it difficult to screw it securely. There was also Keith pressed into his side that made it impossible to concentrate. James was acutely aware of Keith’s wet shirt and the way it clung to his not so flat chest.

Finally, James managed to fix the showerhead. Keith removed his hands cautiously. The water went from gushing to trickling, to nothing. They stood there, catching their breath, both soaked. Sven wouldn’t stop laughing, pointing at them.

“What happened?” James asked, unable not to smile.

Keith groaned. “What does it look like? The stupid showerhead fell! I tried turning the shower off and it didn’t work! Now the whole damn bathroom’s flooded…”

There was indeed half an inch of water surrounding the stall. What was still in the stall was slowly being drained away with a gurgling sound.

“And we’re both soaked,” James concluded.

“Exactly.” Keith looked at his son. “Sven, baby, bring daddy a towel, please.”

Obediently, Sven picked up two fluffy white towels from the counter and brought them to Keith. Trudging through the water seemed to amuse him mightily despite his wet socks and wet trousers.

James stepped out of the stall gingerly, careful not to slip on the wet floor. He blotted the water from his face and hair, thoroughly amused by what had just happened. Keith’s indignant shriek when he’d called his name was something he wouldn’t forget anytime soon.

He smiled, turning to tease Keith about it, and froze. Keith, still in the stall, was in the process of taking off his shirt. The wet fabric clung to his skin while he tried to peel it away. It was over his eyes, mercifully, so he didn’t see James gaping at the display of naked skin. He looked away hurriedly, blushing, but not before he’d taken in the scars and narrow waist and pink nipples and—

Fuck.

He barely realised he’d rushed out of the room, clothes dripping on the bedroom carpet. Face hot, head full of images, he hurriedly changed out of his soaked clothes. Holy shit, the image of Keith shirtless was seared on his brain. It would forever remained burned there. His treacherous mind took him on a happy fantasy trip, forcing him to picture his hands encircling that tiny waist and his mouth suckling on one of those perky nipples.

Fuck, fuck, he couldn’t get hard, not while Keith and Sven were literally on the other side of the wall. He sat on the bed, twisting the towel in his hands. He had to think of something else, something disgusting, something totally turn off: sweaty armpits, greasy hair, the smells of acrid smoke, the sight of blood, the sound of nails scraping down a blackboard—

He calmed down eventually and not a minute too soon; Keith was walking in, running a comb through his damp black hair, looking totally at ease in his sweatpants and large hoodie. James envied him his calm—he was acting like it was totally normal for two people who barely knew each other to share the same bedroom.

And perhaps it was for him because he didn’t have feelings clouding his judgement. Had this been anyone else, James would have been handling this so much easier. But this was Keith, beautiful Keith, the man of his dreams, the person he’d been crushing on for years without hope of any rapprochement whatsoever.

“You okay?” Keith asked.

“Uh, yeah. Do you want me to sleep on the couch?”

The question left a bad taste at the back of his mouth. James’ inner alpha raged, asking why he had to be so blood upstanding. He _wanted_ to share the bed with Keith. It wasn’t solely a matter of having sex with him; he simply wanted to be close, to have a small whiff of what their life together could be. He wanted the memories to bring back home once this mission was over. He wanted to see Keith’s face relaxed in sleep, wanted to hear his snoring and wanted to be witnessed to his tossing and turning. There was also the instinct to protect: they were on a strange planet where one of their own had disappeared. They weren’t quite safe, and James wanted to protect Keith while he slept.

Keith’s eyebrows rose at the question. “No?” He winced when the teeth of the comb tugged at a knot. “There’s no need to be chivalrous, James. I’m not afraid of you. I know you won’t feel me up while I sleep. And if you do, well, I’ll just lop off a couple of fingers.”

“I wouldn’t do that!” James exclaimed, stung. “I was just trying to be decent. Mock me all you want, some people actually appreciate decency.”

Keith scoffed. “I appreciate it too, don’t worry. It just doesn’t bother me to sleep in the same bed as you. And we have to pretend to be in a relationship, anyway. We can’t be too careful.”

He sounded totally uncaring, like this was something he did all the time.

Maybe it was, James contemplated while he got up to close the curtains and make sure the windows were locked. He worked for the Blade of Marmora, a group that was surely full of alphas. They probably often slept rough a bit anywhere, sticking close to each other for warmth and protection. Anyway, Keith had never been afraid of anything, much less of a bunch of alphas. He’d always stood up for himself as a cadet, fighting off any alpha trying to get a sniff.

“You can sleep on the couch if you’re too uncomfortable, though,” Keith said.

“It’s fine.”

Keith frowned at him before shrugging. He put his comb on the nightstand, turned down the bed, and lied down without ceremony, leaving James to turn off the lights. It wasn’t night outside, merely dusk, so a reddish hue filtered through the pale curtains. It bathed the bedroom in an eerie light.

James lied down on his side, his back to Keith, body as stiff as a board. How often had he dreamed of such a moment? He could feel Keith’s body heat radiating under the blankets, could smell his shampoo. If he turned to lie on his other side, he’d be close enough to touch him. He closed his eyes, willing himself to fall asleep. He was a soldier, he’d gotten used to falling asleep with a snap of his fingers. This wouldn’t work this time, not when he felt this antsy.

Either unbothered or trusting, Keith fell asleep easily. His breathing evened out. He stopped tugging on the blankets. James refused to move.

He was in for a long night.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I might have to kiss you,” James hissed at Keith, who’d been too distracted keeping an eye on Sven to notice the approaching young Miziprans.
> 
> “ _Excuse me_?”
> 
> It took him a second to understand the situation. A tiny flash of panic sparked in his eyes before disappearing.
> 
> “What I wouldn’t do for Shiro,” he mumbled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends! Thank you so very much for those nice comments left on the previous chapters! You all make me happy! Here is chapter 8 where the hunt for Shiro and Curtis begins! I hope you'll like it.
> 
> Enjoy!

His fear had been to wake up to realise he’d cuddled up to Keith during the night. He hadn’t expected, not in a million years, to wake up to _Keith_ cuddling him.

James didn’t gradually come out of his slumber—he jerked out of it the second he realised something warm and soft was pressed against his back. His eyes flew open. His heart started a mad tempo in his chest. He didn’t move, barely dared to take a deep breath. He took a second to ascertain that this was reality, that he was no longer asleep.

Keith was indeed cuddled up against him. In fact, he’d thrown both an arm and a leg over James, and he was pressing his face against the nape of his neck. James could feel his breaths against his skin. It sent a shiver down his spine. Keith was pressed close enough that James felt every inch of his body. If Keith had had a dick, it’d be pressed to the small of his back awkwardly.

How was he supposed to disentangle himself? He didn’t want to wake Keith up, fearing Keith would be angered by the situation. And it wasn’t even James’ fault for once! He’d stayed on his side of the bed, so close to the edge he was in risk of falling off. Every one of the blankets were on the floor, which might explain why Keith had needed to get close—it was damn chilly in the bedroom.

Oh so carefully, James pried himself loose. He gently removed Keith’s arm from around his waist and his leg from his hip. Keith’s pant leg had climbed up to his knee during his sleep and James’ traitorous eyes took in the shapely, strong calf and dainty foot. At some point, Keith grumbled under his breath before mercifully turning away.

James sat up, finally letting go of the breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding in. He glanced at the other, took notice of the expanse of white skin that showed above the waistband of his pants where his shirt had ridden up. He had to resist the urge to touch it, to feel its warmth.

Right, this was downright torture. James rubbed his face and checked the time on his phone; barely six in the morning. Back at the Garrison, he’d already be up and about, either getting ready to hit the gym or to find himself some breakfast. He didn’t know what to do here; a tiny part of himself wanted to lie back down while the other knew it wouldn’t be wise. What if he ended up falling asleep and being the one to latch to Keith this time? He was pretty sure Keith wouldn’t like waking up to feel his boner poking at his butt.

The door of the bedroom creaked open. A tired-looking Sven poked his head in. He caught sight of Keith still asleep and, without missing a beat, burst into tears.

James was shocked; in the past few days, Sven hadn’t ever come close to crying. He’d whimpered and his lips had trembled and his eyes had filled with tears, but he hadn’t outright cried once.

The effect was instantaneous: Keith sat up bolt upright, his eyes found his son, and he jumped out of bed to go to him. Sven extended his arms to be picked up and wrapped them around Keith’s neck, bawling into his shoulder.

“What’s wrong?” James asked awkwardly.

The look Keith threw him was… _embarrassed_. “He wet the bed. It happens sometimes when he has nightmares. I’ll take care of him.”

James said nothing, confused as to why Keith would be embarrassed about this. It wasn’t Sven’s fault, wasn’t it? Keith left the room to presumably take care of the mess.

It seemed there would be no more sleeping to be done so James turned on the lights and went about tidying the room. He made the bed, tugging the bedsheets perfectly flat over the mattress with military precision. Once this was done, he dressed into his day clothes. He could no longer hear the sound of crying coming from the living room—Sven had apparently calmed down.

He’d picked Keith’s discarded traveling bag with the intention of putting it away when something rattled inside. Frowning, James unthinkingly looked. Amongst the half-heartedly folded clothes he spotted a—a sex toy. Holy shit. Blushing to the root of his hair, he closed the bag and put it away under the bed.

He was going to die of an aneurysm with so much blood always rushing to his head. He ran his hands through his hair, huffing out of breath. Why was he getting so worked up over this? What did it matter what Keith carried in his bag? James wouldn’t have seen it if not for his stupid obsession of tidying everything up. 

He refused to imagine Keith using the toy. Refused, refused, refused. He had to get a grip on his overactive imagination.

Finally settled, he left the bedroom. Sven sat on the couch in the living room, face still wet from his recent crying bout. In the boy’s bedroom, Keith was stripping the bed of the wet bedlinens.

“You okay, big guy?” James asked, crouching in front of Sven.

He couldn’t abide to see those huge black eyes filled with tears.

Sven’s lips wobbled. “I was bad,” he mumbled.

“Bad? No, you aren’t bad, Sven. Accidents happen. Did daddy say you were bad?”

James didn’t like asking this question, didn’t like the thought that Keith could be mean to his own son. It seemed unlikely given what he’d seen so far, but parents could lose their patience. James had spent enough time with Ryan and his two kids to know that even the most patient of parents sometimes reached the end of their endurance.

Sven shook his head. “No. He say it’s okay.”

“See?” James said, smiling. “It’s okay. Nobody is angry at you, Sven.”

Sven appeared to mull this over. He really was a cute kid, James thought while he watched the emotions play on the boy’s face.

Finally reaching a conclusion, Sven smiled shyly, showing a gap in his otherwise even teeth. “Nobody’s angry at Sven,” he said.

He then extended his arms. James understood the gesture. He hesitated for a second; he wasn’t sure it was within his right to touch the kid. Keith had seemed okay with James talking to him, but touching was something else entirely. Still, he couldn’t say no to that cute face. He carefully picked Sven up, letting him rest against his shoulder.

Having a kid in his arms sent a spike of loss through his heart. He wished it were his own child that he was cradling, his own child nuzzling against his neck. He patted Sven’s back gently, feeling his warmth. The boy was entirely too trusting—they barely knew each other and yet Sven was melting in his arms without hesitation. Perhaps he sensed James’ longing or he instinctively knew James would die rather than ever hurting him.

“Seriously, why don’t you have kids of your own?” Keith asked, stepping out of the room with his arms full of soiled bedsheets.

James hesitated before saying: “I tried. It didn’t work.”

There was a bag for laundry in the bathroom. Keith put the sheets in there and returned to the living room with a frown on his face. “What do you mean?”

“I had a boyfriend. We tried. It didn’t work. Turns out I can’t father children.”

The words hurt, their sting barely soothed by the small, warm bundle in his arms. A year already had passed since he’d heard that dreadful news and it was still painful. He didn’t look at Keith, keeping his eyes focused on the wall. Sven babbled something, a mix of English and Galran that made little sense.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Keith blurted out, sounding genuine. “Damn, I shouldn’t have asked.”

James shrugged and gave him a half-smile. “It’s fine. It happens.”

He put Sven down when the boy started wriggling. Having apparently forgotten all about the morning’s ordeals, he went back to his own bedroom to rummage around, opening and closing drawers noisily.

Keith looked honestly embarrassed by his misstep. It wasn’t as if he could have known, James told him.

“It’s a shame,” Keith said, looking at him straight in the eye. “You’d be a good dad. Sven likes you already. He’s sociable, but he’s taken to you fast.”

James’ face heated. He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. “Really? I’m glad to hear it. He’s a great kid. You don’t mind if I pick him up and stuff? I know some omegas are territorial when it comes to their young. I wouldn’t want it to bother you.”

Keith shrugged. “I don’t mind. We’re both used to it. You wouldn’t imagine how many aunties and uncles he has amongst the Blade. They all like to carry him around and hold him, like he can’t walk by himself.”

James laughed. “The same thing happened when Ryan’s girlfriend had their first kid. It’s like we’d never seen a baby before. We all went a little soft in the head.”

After that, they waited while Sven very seriously considered many outfits to wear today. Once they were ready, they decided to find some breakfast.

The fact that the suns didn’t move in the sky made keeping the time almost impossible. When James stepped outside, it felt as if he’d just come back from his walk five minutes ago. Nothing had changed. The shadows were still in exactly the same positon. The only difference was the lack of people walking the paths.

They made their way slowly towards the cafeteria. Sven walked ahead of them, sometimes stopping to observe an odd bush or touch a weird rock. Keeping a few steps back, James recounted to Keith in a low voice how he’d seen a couple of Miziprans apparently eavesdropping at a window. Keith didn’t look much bothered by this. Of a common accord, they decided they’d keep the curtains of the bedroom closed. Just in case.

The cafeteria James had fetched food from yesterday was closed, so they had to push on further. He’d brought the map of the compound with him in case this happened. There were many other places where to find food in the vicinity anyway. The longer walk gave them a chance to take their first good look of the place.

It was calm. According to what had to be a clock set atop some large building’s roof, it was early morning. Neither James nor Keith could quite tell the hour on it. In the pamphlet they’d received upon their arrival was a lengthy explanation about the way the Miziprans kept time. James had read it twice without making sense of it. There weren’t only hours, minutes, and seconds here apparently. The day was sliced into many more different quadrants and was measured according to the moon that circled around the planet rather than according to the suns. From what he’d gathered, the days were much longer than a regular Earth day.

It was all very confusing. He hadn’t expected to have to make sense of an alien clock. Whenever he’d visited other planets with the Garrison, they’d done everything according to Earth’s time. It was a small comfort to see that Keith also struggled with this.

How amusing; the two best students of the Garrison unable to make sense of a clock.

Their path crossed that of a few other people. There were other children accompanying their parents, most of varying sizes and presumably of varying ages. Sven looked at them with curiosity without quite being brave enough to approach them. A lot of smiles were exchanged, a childish promise that they’d be friends on their next meeting.

It was only belatedly that James remembered they were supposed to be a couple. He hurriedly took Keith’s hand, pulling him a bit closer. There were a few Miziprans waltzing about so better safe than sorry. Keith didn’t look to mind much, suffering through it with ease. He had, after all, said that he’d do whatever was necessary to save Captain Shirogane. He’d risked his own life to do so, what was holding hands compared to that? Still, James relished the small point of contact. Keith’s hand was warm, dainty, and callused after years of sword wielding. It was difficult to imagine that the fate of the whole multiverse had once rested between those fingers.

They found a small place where to get food. While they ate, they discreetly looked at the map of the compound to find where Captain Shirogane had resided during his stay. He’d never mentioned the symbol above his door, but he’d described in details the surroundings of his hut. According to those, he appeared to have stayed further away, nearer to the beach. He had mentioned a beautiful view of the ocean from his window and being able to walk to the beach in less than five minutes. James had gone there yesterday without noticing any habitations, but he hadn’t been looking for any either. He’d simply been too much in a bad mood.

Which he didn’t mention to Keith, of course.

The food they ate was, once again, impossible to describe. They’d chosen to bring their tray outside to eat under a tree rather than inside in a room full of unknown aliens. James was glad Keith was like him in that regard; neither liked the feeling of being cooped up. It was a beautiful day anyway, and the foreign smells of many different meals and people was mindboggling. More often than not, James found himself looking up when an omega walked by, a spark of desire rising through him despite them being an alien.

Clearly, Nadia’s idea of getting rid of his pent up frustrations before leaving Earth hadn’t really worked. His only comfort was that Keith at times did glance up too, his eyes following an alpha alien. James could never tell whether he was truly interested or was merely… assessing the local populace.

Breakfast done with, they made their way towards the beach. Halfway there, Sven complained of being tired. Keith picked him up, letting him ride piggyback. Sven kept talking in that mix of Galran and English that made little sense to James. If James talked to him, he’d switch to English easily, but it seemed that Galran was his default language.

“Ninety-nine percent of the time, we are with fellow Galras,” Keith explained, “I taught him English only because Lance implored me to.”

“Ah. So you never planned on coming back to Earth with him?”

“Why would I? There’s nothing for us there. I see Pidge and Hunk yearly on New Altea. Otherwise, we talk over video chats.”

“What about Captain Shirogane?” James blurted out.

Keith’s lips thinned. He shook his head. “We don’t really talk anymore. We’re both very busy with our lives.”

But you still talk to the three others, James wanted to argue. He didn’t, knowing he’d be pushing his luck. It wasn’t any of his business, though it was morbidly fascinating nonetheless. It seemed totally inconceivable that the captain and his star-struck cadet would no longer be on good terms. Ever since Keith had joined the Garrison, it had been Keith and Shiro, Shiro and Keith. Every other cadet had hated Keith because of his proximity to their hero, James included. It would seem something happened during their time in outer space that had shattered their friendship.

James wasn’t usually a nosy person; he hated people minding his business so he made sure to keep out of other people’s business. He was dying of curiosity however. Back in Commander Iverson’s office, Keith had said that the captain and he hadn’t talked for _years_. He hadn’t even known Captain Shirogane and Lieutenant Miller were fiancés. Whatever had happened was huge enough to overcome years of friendship. Was it because of Lieutenant Miller? Everybody with eyes to see had known Keith had had a crush on his mentor. Had he expected there could be more between them after they’d gotten closer during their time as Paladins of Voltron? It was hard to say. Not so long ago, James would have said Keith was childish and mean enough to be angry at the captain for not returning his feelings. Now, he was no longer so sure.

The second they reached the beach, Sven asked to be let down. Keith put him back on his feet in the sand and the boy started running towards the water.

“Can he swim?” James asked worriedly.

“No, but he knows not to get too close.”

Sven indeed stopped a couple of feet short of the water. He stood there with his hands clasped behind his back, rocking on his heels, admiring the view.

“You didn’t teach him to swim?”

“I grew up in the desert James, I don’t know how,” Keith said distractedly, looking around for the place they were looking for.

“Ah. I’ll teach the both of you if you want.”

“Meh, maybe. Look, on top of the rise over there, does it look like a hut?” He pointed in the direction opposite where they’d come.

Squinting, James followed his pointing finger. There was indeed a slight bump in the land atop which a smudge could be seen. They were too far to see whether this was a hut or not, but the place could have been the one Captain Shirogane described in his report.

They followed the beach in that direction, allowing Sven to pick up weird seashells and giggle when a bit of foamy water splashed over his shoes.

There was a gaggle of Miziprans walking towards them. Without understanding why, James knew they were teenagers, or at least much younger than the Miziprans that had greeted them upon their arrival yesterday. They were talking in low, melodious voices, gliding easily over the sand. The colours of their garments and skin were more muted than the other Miziprans James had met so far. They were also shorter, shorter than both Keith and him. Whenever they met another couple strolling by the water, they stopped and chanted _kiss kiss_ before presumably taking a picture. Every couple played the game, kissing or doing whatever passed for kissing for their species.

“I might have to kiss you,” James hissed at Keith, who’d been too distracted keeping an eye on Sven to notice the approaching young Miziprans.

“ _Excuse me_?”

It took him a second to understand the situation. A tiny flash of panic sparked in his eyes before disappearing.

“What I wouldn’t do for Shiro,” he mumbled.

Any coherent thought fled from James’ mind when Keith grabbed him by the front of his shirt and pulled him in for a kiss. It lasted no more than three seconds, just long enough to satisfy any passerby. James didn’t have time to relish it that Keith was pushing him gently back, giving a small wave to the giggling Miziprans.

“Are you going to stay there until you grow roots?” Keith asked once they were alone again. “We’ve got to check that hut out.”

It had meant nothing to Keith, of course. It should mean nothing to James. But it did. He could still feel the press of Keith’s soft, plush lips against his, feel his breath against his cheek, feel a stray lock of hair brushing over his forehead. It hadn’t really been a kiss, he told himself, hurrying after the other. It had only been a press of the lips, utterly chaste, the way friends and family members greeted each other sometimes.

He hurried after Keith who’d picked Sven up and was marching towards the hut in long strides. Although Sven looked sad to be leaving the sand behind, he didn’t complain—everywhere new was an exciting playground for a child his age after all.

The hut they’d seen in the distance was a good five minutes away from the beach. There was in fact more than one hut—there was a small cluster of them, two dozen at most, huddling on top of a small rise in the land. From here, the view of the beach with its forever setting suns was beautiful. James paused to look over the ocean, breath catching in his throat. He pulled his phone out of his pocket to snap a few pictures, knowing Ryan with his artist’s soul would love it.

 They slowly circled the cluster of huts, pretending to be strolling leisurely. It was difficult to tell which one might have housed Captain Shirogane and his fiancé from the description that had been sent to Commander Iverson. They’d have to check inside and hope their rooms weren’t as similar as their exterior.

Unapologetic, Keith peeked into windows. James remained a few feet away, keeping watch in case someone walked by. He tried to look relaxed, keeping his hands into his pockets. After a while, Sven came running to him, apparently tired to be carried. He sat on the grass and began pulling handfuls out of the soft earth. There was already a brown smudge across his cheek.

“It’s this one,” Keith told him, pointing to the hut situated slightly apart from the rest. “It’s the only one with the conveniently placed toilet paper holder.”

“The _what_?”

Keith grinned. “Shiro mentioned liking the hut because the toilet paper holder was conveniently placed for once. He’s left handed so it annoys him when the holder’s on the left.”

It was such an intimate, personal thing to know that James never would have picked it up. He’d read those lines without understanding what they meant. He’d thought the captain was making a joke. Surely only Keith would have noticed such a thing.

“It’s empty. I’ll force the door. Make sure nobody interrupts.”

Before James had time to answer, Keith was already picking at the door lock with a small hairclip pulled from his hair.

“Let’s be thankful for backward places with little technology,” Keith mumbled as he worked. “Never thought I’d have to pick a lock again.”

 Of course Keith would know how to pick a lock.

Just like everything else, the door didn’t resist him for long. A small click, and it was swinging inward slowly.

James cringed while Keith slipped inside without a look behind. He didn’t appear bothered that he was certainly breaking the law and that getting caught would mean being sent home packing. James stood guard with Sven by his side, trying to look nonchalant while keeping his eyes peeled for any unwanted attention. There were a few people in the distance, but nobody seemed to have their attention turned towards those few huts.

A couple walked by, too engrossed into each other to notice James standing there with his heart in his throat. He felt pathetic; during the invasion, he hadn’t been that nervous. He’d worked on his nerves so much that, after a while, slipping into the city unnoticed and rescuing civilians had become almost too easy. He hadn’t been afraid of Galra patrols or of their surveillance drones. Yet here he was now, sweating nervously under his light jacket, fearing a Mizipran would jump out of the shadows to catch them red-handed.

“What dada doing?” Sven asked, looking up at him.

“Hm, looking for something.”

Sven pulled out a piece of grass. “What that?”

“A blade of grass.”

Sven scrunched up his face in puzzlement. “Blade cut.”

James had to laugh. “Not all blades cut, Sven.”

“Dada says no touching his blade because it cut.”

“That’s right, but it’s a different type of blade. You understand?”

Sven shrugged before returning his attention to the apparently fascinating grass. On impulse, James patted his thick black hair.

Keith thankfully remerged a few minutes later. Judging by the way he slammed the door shut, he hadn’t found anything of interest inside the hut. Rather than storm about, he took a deep breath to calm himself, tiling his head towards the dark sky. James watched him out of the corner of his eye, witnessing how easily he let go of his rage. Once again it reminded him of how much Keith had changed ever since their first meeting. That Keith would have stormed off, stomping his feet and swearing. Whatever had happened in the last seven years or so had completely changed him.

“Nothing?” James asked.

“Nothing at all. It’s all clean and scrubbed. It’s like nobody lived here for months. Of course, if Shiro disappeared because of them, the Miziprans would have cleaned up.”

“You’re still certain they’re guilty?”

Keith shrugged. “What else makes sense? Had it been an accident, they wouldn’t have swept it all up under the rug, don’t you think?”

“Unless they didn’t want the bad press a disappearance would bring.”

“Shiro wouldn’t just disappear, jeez, James. He’s not some helpless bloke. He’s got a weapon permanently attached to his right shoulder for heaven’s sake!”

James frowned. “No. He had the prosthetic changed a couple of years ago. It’s more similar to the one he had previously, the Galra one.”

Keith hadn’t known that. The corner of his mouth twitched. “Whatever. He doesn’t need a huge arm to be able to fight off a bunch of aliens.”

“Probably not. Well, let’s not despair yet. We’ve only started looking.”

“You’re right.” Keith huffed out a breath. “On his first day, Shiro said he explored the beach around here. Apparently, if we follow the path due west, there’s a small farm with petting animals. He stopped there.”

“Never took the captain to be a fan of animals.”

“Curtis is, apparently,” Keith grumbled. He rubbed his forehead. “According to Shiro, it’s about an hour’s walk. It’s almost midday. Sven will need his nap after dinner. We’ll go afterward.”

“Good idea.”

Keith picked his son up and retraced their steps.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You know you’re insufferable when you’re smug?” Keith told him later that afternoon.
> 
> “What? Can’t a man be glad of his discovery?” he said, leaning back on the couch with a grin.
> 
> Keith scowled, throwing him a black glare over his shoulder. “Wipe that smirk off your face or I swear I’ll dump that burning coffee on your lap, Griffin.”
> 
> “I’d love to see you trying to explain that to Commander Iverson.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there, folk! Once again, I want to thank every one of you who reads this story and to thank those who take the time to write a comment or leave a kudos! It's very much appreciated!
> 
> Here is chapter 9 for you. We get to learn a tiny bit more about James' past, and a new friendship is slowly forming between him and one of their hosts.
> 
> On a side note, happy Mother's Day to everybody! I will be writing a small thread based on the Chlorine universe on my Twitter to celebrate this day, so join me over there if you'd like to read it!
> 
> Enjoy this new chapter!

A small drizzle started falling while they were making their way back home. Keith didn’t want Sven to catch cold so they stopped under the hanging branches of a big tree to wait it out. According to what James had read on the planet, rain never lasted more than thirty minutes. They’d wait until it was over and then be on their way.

Sven had fallen asleep in Keith’s arms, head resting on his shoulder, mouth hanging open a little. Keith rocked him gently, patting his back once in a while in an easy gesture that spoke of long practice.

They didn’t talk while they waited, content to watch the soft droplets fall. They clung to the blueish tree leaves before falling almost delicately, dampening the grass. The world went very silent, as if everybody, of a common accord, paused until the weather changed again. The air smelled of damp earth.

It was peaceful.

James glanced at Keith and saw that he wasn’t wearing a jacket, only a short-sleeved shirt. There were goosebumps on his arms. Should he offer his jacket or would that offend Keith?

He unzipped it and, not giving Keith time to protest, wrapped it around Sven. It covered Keith’s arms too and would protect him partially from the light chill.

“I don’t want him to be cold,” James said, striving for nonchalance.

Keith’s eyes were riveted on him, big and clear and yet unreadable. He didn’t look angry or annoyed. “Thanks.”

James shrugged. And really, it was nothing. It was true that he didn’t want Sven to be cold. It just so happened that seeing his jacket on Keith did something to his heart, to his guts. His jacket would smell like Keith afterward, and maybe a tiny bit of his own scent would transfer to him too. Couples scented each other all the time, and James couldn’t help wondering if those they’d encountered this far were puzzled by the fact that they didn’t. He’d thought to ask if Keith wanted to do it until he’d realised it was perhaps a tad too intimate.

Except that now they’d kissed. Kind of. James’ lips still tingled from it. It had been too brief for him to feel much, a mere pressure, the hint of warmth. It only served to make him hunger for more. He yearned for the real thing, to be able to pull Keith to him and hold him and kiss him deeply, to feel him melt against him and respond with equal fervour.

But he could be content with a peck. It was more than he had ever dared dreaming of.

The rain relented enough for them to be on their way. The dewy grass shone and the clouds were chased away by a brisk wind. The landscape looked washed, clean, the colours brighter. The perpetual twilight didn’t appear as gloomy as usual.

“Do you want me to check that farm while you stay with Sven?” James suggested once they’d returned to their hut. Keith didn’t look certain so he said: “How hard can it be to look around? I promise I won’t get eaten by a cow.”

A tiny smile played at the corner of Keith’s mouth. “James Griffin has a sense of humour. Wonders never cease. Fine, whatever, go. I’ll update Commander Iverson while you’re away. I’ll drop by to see Zethrid and Ezor. Maybe they’ve heard something.”

“Are you sure it’s wise to _drop by_? We aren’t supposed to know each other.”

“I’ll merely walk in the general direction of their hut and maybe meet them by accident. My son’s very social, he likes to talk to anyone, you know.”

Sounded plausible. Children were indeed social and, anyway, Sven was way too young to understand he was supposed not to know Zethrid and Ezor. He’d probably rush to them the second he spotted them in the distance.

“All right, see you later. Do you want me to fetch food when I come back?”

Keith shook his head distractedly. “No, I’ll take care of it. It’s my turn.”

Well, weren’t they both full of surprises today.

James left him to his son and made his way back to the beach, following the path that ran parallel to the coastline. Now that the rain had stopped, a great deal of people were once again in a hurry to be out. He found the lawns to be crowded with couples or families sitting on blankets to eat their lunch. The merry, easy air disconcerted him. He wasn’t used to people lounging about in the middle of the day.

At the Garrison, doing nothing was frowned upon. Not taking days off was even encouraged. There was too much to do, even five years after the end of the invasion. The wounds left by the attack on Earth still needed tending to heal properly. Millions of people had been displaced. A lot of them still lived in poor conditions, some without running water or electricity to make them comfortable. It was the Voltron Coalition’s job to take care of them, both on Earth and everywhere else in the universe. Since James and his crew no longer had access to proper space vessels, they were stuck helping around on their own planet. When he wasn’t busy training new recruits, he was being sent wherever his help was required. More often than not, it involved bringing victuals, fresh water, and a hell of a lot of manual labour. James spent twice the time shoveling dirt and laying bricks than piloting. It was fulfilling, it warmed his heart to help, it wasn’t his dream job.

On his right, the ocean shone beneath the twin low suns. Its pink hues were darkened to red and mauve in some places while the froth on top was the colour of strawberry milk. A few children were playing in the waves under the watchful eyes of adults reclining on the blue sand. Despite the recent rain, the ground was already drying. He heard music coming from a distant pavilion accompanied by the sound of laughter. The notes were foreign, produced by instruments he couldn’t begin to imagine, yet the harmonies were pleasing to his ear nonetheless. Everybody looked to be having a merry time.

Except that lone figure. James’ steps slowed. He narrowed his eyes, trying to get a better look at the person seated all alone on the sand. What caught his attention wasn’t quite that there was nobody else around this person, but their stance. Their shoulders were bowed and their head hang low in the universal pose of defeat. Such misery against the beautiful, colourful background of the beach struck him as utterly sad.

He’d have moved on if the posture of the person hadn’t rang a bell. It took him a second to realise this must be the Mizipran who’d welcomed them yesterday. What had been their name? Assimya, yes, that was it. That gloomy air surrounding Assmiya was a sharp contrast to their serene behaviour from the day before.

James hesitated before making his way towards the disconsolate Mizipran. He mentally apologized to Captain Shirogane, swearing to resume his search in a timely manner.

The sand beneath his feet muffled the sound of his approach. He cleared his throat, not wanting to startle the Mizipran.

They looked up. Although they had no recognizable facial features, their four eyes were eloquent enough. They were filled with tears, shiny. The once bright colour of their skin (or clothes or both) appeared dull, greyish.

“Oh,” Assmiya said. “I do apologize. Did you need something, James?”

James sat down beside them, offering a smile. “No, everything’s perfect. I just thought you might need a little company. Is it all right if I sit here for a moment?”

Assmiya made a movement that might have been a shrug. “This is a public beach, therefore you can sit wherever you wish.” A pause. “I appreciate the thought, however.”

“Hey, it’s fine. Some companionship is nice once in a while.”

They sat in silence, turning their gaze towards the moving ocean. Birds a bright yellow colour swooped towards the waves before arching up towards the sky again. Children laughed nearby, splashing in the water while others were busy making sand castles. James couldn’t help being amazed at how similar children of every species were: give them some room to play, a shovel and a bucket, and they were happy.

A sniffling sound brought his attention back to his companion. There were wet tracks running down Assimya’s cheeks, greyish-green in colour.

“Is everything all right?” he asked tentatively.

The wind shifted, blowing straight into his face the smells of a distressed omega. Assmiya wiped their eyes with their unseen arm. They appeared wrapped in a huge cloak from neck to foot, limbs only guessed at under the cloth.

“My bond to Assilsa has been revoked,” they said in a low, pale voice.

“Oh. Oh. I’m very sorry.”

He remembered reading that bonds were easily breakable on Mizipra if a couple didn’t manage to produce children in a timely manner. They believed that the infertility didn’t lie in one person, that it lied in the incompatibility of the couple. Because of that, couples were broken up all the time by… whoever took care of this kind of stuff. The two persons involved were then paired with someone else.

James had found it barbaric. Now that he was seeing firsthand the effect of such a law, he found it cruel as well. Assmiya was clearly distressed, and who could blame them? How difficult it must be to be paired to someone you barely knew, forced to produce children, perhaps come to an understanding, and then have it all torn away.

“I knew this could happen,” Assmiya was saying, “but Assilsa and I were getting along. We both thought things would work out.”

James didn’t really know what to say. “Believe it or not, I understand what you mean. I… had a partner, before Keith. We were together for three years. We tried to have children, and it didn’t work. We weren’t forced to separate, things don’t work like that on Earth. It put such strain on our couple that we eventually broke up.”

“You broke up willingly?”

“Well, he wanted to be with someone who could give him children, so he told me he wanted to leave. I had no choice, I had to let him go.”

“You didn’t fight for him?”

James chuckled. “There was no point. Our families were glad of it. There was very little keeping us together at the end.” He blushed and cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, you’re distressed and I’m making things worse.”

“No, you are not. Hearing you broke up with your previous partner and are now with someone else you love gives me hope.” Assimya’s eyes shone brighter and the effect was similar to that of a smile. “You two are different from the other Earthlings who have visited. You aren’t as amorous.”

James’ heart leapt. Other Earthlings. Could they be referring to Captain Shirogane and his fiancé? He tried to keep his face impassive, uncaring.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you are the first couple I tend to, but I’ve heard from others that humans are a very amorous species. They always try very hard to have children.”

James was so focused on the mention of other humans that he barely registered what Assmiya was saying. “O-Oh. Uh—” Shit, it had only been one day and they’d already been found out? He had to find a way around this and to get them to talk about the other humans. “Keith doesn’t feel very amorous when he’s uh… at that time of the month.” He chuckled nervously. “We usually are though! Very amorous, I mean!”

Assimya’s eyes were fixed on him, amused. “You’re shy. It’s the first time I meet a male alpha who is shy.”

Urgh, won’t the ground open up and swallow him?! “Keith and I are just recently a couple. We’ve, uh, we’ve known each other for a long time, but we weren’t on good terms.”

“Oh. Normally, new couples are very energetic in their lovemaking.”

James flushed. “We are, normally! When Keith isn’t—” Hell, why was it difficult to say? “When he isn’t having his period,” he blurted out, cheeks flaming.

“It is perfectly normal. There is no need for embarrassment.”

Another nervous chuckle. “Yeah, I know.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Are there a lot of humans who come here?”

“A few. You’re the first ones I meet in person, however. Assilsa is the one who’s been working here for a long time. They’re the one who talked about humans.”

“Are there other humans here right now? It’d be nice to meet them.”

Was the pause calculating? James’ heart hammered in his chest as he stared intently at the Mizipran, trying to catch a hint of their thoughts.

“Not that I know of. They’d be in this area I suppose.”

James sifted their tone, looking for any trace of a lie or omission. He couldn’t tell for sure, but it seemed Assmiya wasn’t being dishonest. From their conversation, he’d say that the Mizipran was very young and that it was their first time working here with the tourists. It was entirely probable that they’d never encountered any other human, either Captain Shirogane or anyone else.

“That’s too bad,” James said with a small smile.

“I can ask Assilsa. You have been very nice, it’s the least I can do. Perhaps your mate would feel better surrounded by people of their— _his_ species.”

James’ smile widened. “That would be very kind of you. You’re right, Keith does feel homesick.”

“If you don’t mind my asking, do human alphas find it easy to care for the pups of another alpha?”

The question took him by surprise. “It depends of the alpha. Most of them don’t appreciate it very much to be honest. We can be competitive and territorial I suppose.”

“You don’t mind that your mate’s pup isn’t yours?”

“No.”

“Then you are indeed a very nice alpha.” Assmiya got up with a wiggle of their body. Their colours looked better, somehow. “I must go. I will try talking to Assilsa about fellow humans for your mate. Good day, James.”

“Yeah, see you.”

-

“You know you’re insufferable when you’re smug?” Keith told him later that afternoon.

He’d visited the small farm, not finding anything. All the while his mind had been going back to the discussion he’d had with Assimya, sifting it for hints about the whereabouts of Captain Shirogane. It had also brought to light the fact that the Miziprans, perhaps without downright spying, knew what they were doing in their hut. He’d checked for bugs again without finding any, and now he wondered if there were Miziprans listening at the window of every inhabited hut. They could be in trouble.

Nevertheless, he couldn’t help teasing Keith a little over the fact that he’d been the first to unearth something worthwhile.

“What? Can’t a man be glad of his discovery?” he said, leaning back on the couch with a grin.

Keith snorted. “You’ve only heard about other humans. We already know folks from Earth came here in the past. It doesn’t tell us anything.”

“Well, what did _you_ find so far?”

Keith scowled, throwing him a black glare over his shoulder. “Wipe that smirk off your face or I swear I’ll dump that burning coffee on your lap, Griffin.”

“I’d love to see you trying to explain that to Commander Iverson.”

“In fact,” Keith continued, approaching dangerously close with the mug of coffee, “I should do it, for the way you’ve depicted me to Assimya! Making me sound like a timid, homesick omega!”

“I panicked, okay?! I didn’t know how else to explain why we weren’t… energetically trying to make children! Careful with that mug, Kogane!”

 The mug was thankfully deposited on the coffee table rather than upended on James’ lap.

“You should be glad Assmiya is either naïve or doesn’t know about human anatomy, otherwise they might have asked why we haven’t considered anal.”

James, who’d been taking a sip of his beverage, sputtered. Hot coffee flooded his mouth, burning his tongue. He swallowed painfully, coughing, tears in his eyes.

“You’re such a stuck-up wuss,” Keith said, smirking at his gobsmacked expression. “Maybe that’s why your boyfriend left you; you were too boring.” He sat on the other end of the couch with a huff. “Anyway. We’re still no closer to finding Shiro, at least not until we talk to that Assilsa.”

“That’s a shitty thing to say,” James spluttered between coughs. He cleared his throat a few times. “If you really need to know, Alex thought I was way too… adventurous. And that’s not why we broke up. So there.” He waved his hand to indicate he was done with this subject. “And did you get to see Zethrid and Ezor?”

Keith narrowed his eyes at him, watching him speculatively. He nodded. “Yeah, I talked to them, but they haven’t heard much either. Zethrid is already getting bored of this assignment. She’s not much for infiltration and stealth.”

“You don’t have to tell me. What do you want to do now?”

“Stick to the plan. Retrace Shiro’s footsteps. I also want to know the kind of records the Miziprans keep of their visitors. There’s certainly a logbook somewhere that we could access. Maybe there’d be something there.”

“We know the captain came here.”

Keith indicated the bracelet they were wearing, the one supposed to limit their access to the restricted areas. “There must be a sort of computer keeping track of these. It’s not organic, not in the way the Olkari technology works. I’ve fiddled with it a little. There seems to be a chip inside, but I don’t want to risk breaking it. If Pidge or Hunk were here, they’d take it apart in the blink of an eye.”

James thought for a moment. “Scan it and send them the scan. You can do that easily enough with your phone. We simply have to make sure we have a secure channel before sending it. I could ask Nadia to look at it too, she’s good with computers. Surely, between the three of them, they’ll be able to figure something out.”

Keith leaned back, resting his feet up on the coffee table, thinking. “Makes sense.” He rubbed his eyes. “I wish there was somewhere we could sneak into and snoop around rather than just stumble about. It feels like we’re groping in the dark. If this damn Iverson just told us why Shiro came here in the first place! It’d might help!”

This was the first time Keith was showing signs of temper. James was kind of amazed it had taken this long. Still, he couldn’t deny that the other was right. They were looking for a needle in a haystack. How were they supposed to find two men on a planet they barely knew, restricted as they were? It was important they didn’t attract unwanted attention upon themselves. Mizipra was part of the Voltron Coalition, they couldn’t just tear the place apart without good reason. It might set a bad precedent.

“You still think the captain didn’t come here of his own volition?”

Keith huffed out an exasperated breath. “No! This isn’t Shiro’s style! Why would he retire and then suddenly decide to come here?”

“Visiting a beautiful planet with his fiancé is quite different than risking his life fighting aliens. Maybe he just wanted to get away from the Garrison for a while. I don’t know, I barely know him.” James had a sudden flash of inspiration. “But I know Lieutenant Miller. He’s always been on good terms with us.”

The mere mention of Captain Shirogane’s fiancé sent a ripple of distaste across Keith’s face. He pursed his lips. “Go on.”

James frowned, thinking back on previous conversations he’d had with the lieutenant. The man was friendly and kind and forthcoming. He’d been proud of his relationship with Captain Shirogane and often talked about him. When their schedules coincided, he’d sit with the MFE pilots for supper to exchange news.

“I think there was trouble in paradise,” James said slowly. “Lieutenant Miller didn’t look particularly happy the last time I talked to him. He mentioned the captain working too much and how they barely had time to see each other.”

“What did he expect? Shiro’s always been a workaholic, he can’t have changed _that_ much.”

“Keith, put your feelings aside and _think_. Maybe they decided to come to this place to work on their couple.”

“Shiro didn’t come here willingly. Either Iverson sent him on a secret mission or Curtis dragged him here.”

“Jeez, I feel like I’m talking to a stubborn child! Can’t you accept that maybe the captain changed over the past years? How would you even know, anyway? You admitted yourself that you haven’t talked to him for the longest time.”

The words hurt Keith. His eyebrows were pinched and his jaw gritted. He sat stiffly, all his usual smooth grace fled. James felt both a pang of pity and a pang of vindictive pleasure at this display.

“Yes, Shiro’s probably changed,” Keith admitted reluctantly, “but not enough to become another person. Think whatever you like, I don’t give a damn.”

James heaved a sigh. “Did you ask the commander if he is the one who sent Captain Shirogane on a secret mission?”

“Yes. And he didn’t say anything because that’s how he is. He’s a soldier, a general, he keeps this kind of stuff to himself. It’s always been on a need-to-know basis at the Garrison. You, of all people, should know.”

“That’s true, and I think the commander would have told us because we _need_ to know.”

Keith gave him a pitying look and didn’t gratify this with an answer. He took his phone out of his pocket, effectively putting an end to their unpleasant conversation.

He’d made his point. James didn’t want to doubt a commanding officer’s word, but a tiny seed of doubt had been planted. Was it possible that Commander Iverson was holding back information from them? If so, what would be the point? How could they hope to accomplish their mission without knowing all the facts?

He finished his coffee distractedly, thinking back on the conversation he’d just had. Keith was pretty sure something sinister was afoot. James had to admit that the situation was indeed irregular. Captain Shirogane disappearing like that didn’t make sense. The man was too dutiful to simply willingly disappear without a word. James’ theory that he’d wanted to go off the map didn’t hold water. Considering the Miziprans, James couldn’t imagine them whisking away a man like the captain. The Miziprans appeared ethereal, soft, their body wispy like smoke. How could they make the captain of the Atlas, the previous Black Paladin, do anything against his will? Had they perhaps drugged him? If so, for what purpose? Their planet survived on tourism and agriculture.

Unless they’d taken the captain _because_ he was Captain Takashi Shirogane of the Voltron Coalition. Were they holding him to ransom? It had been four weeks of total radio silence, surely they’d have made their demands by now. Was that what Commander Iverson was not telling them? Had the Miziprans contacted him already and, since he was unwilling to negotiate, he had sent James and Keith for a rescue mission?

Round and round went the suppositions inside James’ head until his brain hurt. He took out his own phone, looking through the various notifications to change his mind a little. Nadia had sent him exactly twenty-two texts of various importance and coherence. A few were videos of the three cats she still believed were a secret, kept tucked away in a shed. Hunk and she took care of them behind everybody’s back. One of the texts asked if Keith and he had come to blows yet. Another was to whine about one of her coworkers, another to whine about her commanding officer’s demands.

He took it all to mean everything was fine amongst his team, and he realised he had been worrying about them. It was stupid of course; they were perfectly fine, perfectly safe on Earth with each other. Still, he supposed that worrying for his team came with being a leader. He took the time to text them through their group chat, sending them a few pictures he’d taken so far.

Once this was taken care of, he noticed he still had one unread text left. Frowning, he opened it. It came from an unlisted number that he didn’t recognize at once. When he did, his breath caught in his throat. His heart leapt. He straightened, eyes riveted on the screen of his phone. Eight months of silence and now a text? Now that he couldn’t afford to be distracted? The words _I miss you_ burned cruelly, threatening to reignite the ambers he’d tried dousing over the past year. He was both angry and relieved to hear from Alex. He had no idea what to answer or if he should answer at all. He closed the text, debating asking Ryan or Nadia for their input. He knew what Nadia would say: _Run like hell! Don’t text back! Ignore him!_ and he was pretty sure Ryan would give a similar, though better worded, advice.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

James glanced up. Keith’s words brought him back to the present—he was looking at him with an eyebrow cocked.

“Uh, yeah, sorry.”

“What’s wrong?”

At any other time, James would be thrumming with excitement at the fact that Keith was asking after his wellbeing. As it stood, it just annoyed him.

He put the phone away. “Nothing you need to concern yourself with.”

Keith snorted. “Sorry for asking.”

James felt his phone through the fabric of his pants like a burning brand. _I miss you_ Alex had written, like he hadn’t been the one deciding they break up, like he hadn’t been the one pushing James away. Bitterness swirled in his belly. He recalled those horrible weeks after the breakup, how difficult it had been to piece himself back together. He’d thrown himself headlong into work, not counting his hours, accepting any task anyone gave him just so he didn’t have to be alone with his thoughts. He’d spent as much time as possible away from the Garrison, pouring his frustration into whatever needed to be accomplished. He’d been happy to help refugees dig aqueducts and foundations and to build their homes and fix their roads.

All that frustration and pain and sadness he thought had been sweated away came crashing back. It left him breathless like a punch to the stomach.

“Griffin—”

He didn’t listen. He got up and left, needing fresh air.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith stopped abruptly and James collided with his back.
> 
> “What are you doing?” James hissed.
> 
> “I can’t go on. There’s something.”
> 
> “You’re scared?”
> 
> “No, moron.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! Once again, thank you very much to everybody who reads this story and thank you to all of you who comment!
> 
> There is a bit of action in this chapter, finally! James and Keith find something out of place in the forest, but is it linked to Shiro's and Curtis' disappearance? Read to find out!

It was nearing midnight when James came back, drenched. The mist had turned into a light rain while he’d been out walking his frustration off. His clothes and hair stuck to his chilled skin. He was shivering uncontrollably by the time he set foot into the small hut. He wished it were night, that the stupid twin suns would set and that the sky would turn black. He wanted the landscape to reflect his dark mood. He’d been gone for hours and he still had no idea what to do.

And he was pissed, pissed at himself for reacting so violently, pissed at Alex for texting him now of all time, pissed at Captain Shirogane for disappearing, pissed at Commander Iverson for sending him to fetch him, pissed at the world for making his life so damn miserable. Hell, he was even pissed at Keith for the sole reason that he was his crush. Even after three years with Alex, James had never been able to completely forget Keith, and that made him angrier.

He expected to be alone when he returned. Instead, Keith had apparently been waiting for him. The sight of him in his sweatpants and hoodie, seated on the couch reading on his tablet, stopped James dead in his tracks. He stood on the threshold, one foot inside and one foot out.

A gust of wind reminded him to close the door. He did. His clothes dripped on the carpet, leaving small puddles around his muddy boots. With a long-suffering sigh, Keith threw him a towel that he caught without thinking.

“You done sulking?” he asked.

The condescending tone should have angered James further. Instead, exhaustion made it difficult to care much. He _had_ been sulking, after a fashion. Angrily sulking.

“Yeah,” he answered, toeing off his boots. Damn, even his socks were wet. “Thanks for the towel.”

“Don’t do that again, storming off like that. You know it’s not safe.”

James rolled his eyes. “I wouldn’t have gotten kidnapped off the side of the road.”

“For all we know, it’s what happened to Shiro.”

James didn’t argue, didn’t care to.

“Anyway, now that I know you’re back in one piece, I’m off to bed.”

“Why did you wait for me?”

Keith got up and threw him a puzzled look. “That’s what teammates do; they look out for each other. Don’t tell me you didn’t do that with your team.”

“We did,” James admitted. He looked away, embarrassed. “Thanks. I apologize for storming off. It wasn’t very professional of me.”

“Whatever. Good night.”

James let him go to bed. He changed into dry clothes, suddenly exhausted of all this strife. He decided he wouldn’t think about Alex and about his text for the duration of this mission. Alex hadn’t talked to him in months, surely he could wait a couple of weeks more. James needed his head fully in the game. He didn’t want to fail his mission, didn’t want to disappoint Commander Iverson.

Didn’t want to disappoint Keith. Keith who’d waited up on him, who’d been selfless and kind enough to make sure James was all right before going to bed. It warmed him a little on the inside, that small sign of… comradeship. Not friendship, surely, but Keith was proving he could be a team player, perhaps even more so than James.

Since there was nothing left to do, James decided he should hit the hay too. He glanced into Sven’s room, making sure the boy was safe in his bed. Sven was asleep under his mountain of blankets. A small night-light threw a gentle glow on his peaceful face. Satisfied, he left the door ajar and tiptoed into the master bedroom. Keith too was already asleep, dark hair fanned on the white pillowcase, body slack in repose.

The lightning strike of lust that hit him wasn’t quite a surprise. In fact, he was more surprised it hadn’t manifested sooner. How often had he dreamed of having Keith in his bed since realising his feelings for the other man? More times than he cared to count. It had always been a fantasy at the back of his mind, something he knew would never happen.

Yet there they were, sharing the same blankets, separated only by a few inches. Keith’s back was to him, and the gesture didn’t feel forced—it didn’t feel like he was doing it to shut James out. He was simply comfortable. James’ fingers tingled with the need to reach out, to touch that proud spine, to feel that silky hair. He wanted to pull Keith to him, to press their hips together, to feel Keith’s round butt against his hardening dick. He wondered how much he could do before the other woke up, wondered if he could make him submit to his touch. What would it take to wake him up? Would James have time to slip a hand under his shirt, under the waistband of his pants, down his panties until his fingers found that hot, wet place between his legs?

He’d loved doing that to Alex, loved waking him up by fingering him then taking him while he was half-asleep, warm and pliant against him. He didn’t think Keith would be so pliant; Keith would be demanding and wanton and totally un-omega-like in his attitude. He wouldn’t go with the flow, wouldn’t be shy. Shit, hadn’t he said a few hours ago that he did anal when he was on his period?  James’ dick throbbed at the thought. He’d done it a few times with Alex, but he hadn’t liked it much and James hadn’t insisted. Keith would like it—Keith liked taking dicks in any of his holes.

Unable to settle down, James got up, body burning. He had the urge to jerk off while staring at the back of Keith’s head, but decency demanded he didn’t. Instead, he went to the bathroom, showered in cold water, took care of his business, and then went back to bed.

Like the previous morning, James woke up to Keith clinging to him, except that this time, they were face to face. Keith was still mercifully asleep. His head was pillowed on James’ arm and he’d again thrown a leg over him. James barely dared to take a breath or move a muscle. He didn’t notice that his arm had gone numb. Every one of his senses converged on Keith. He became hyperaware of his warmth, of his soft breathing, of the silky hair touching his skin, of the thick eyelashes casting a shadow on high cheekbones, on plush lips parted ever so slightly. Mostly, the peaceful set of Keith’s features sent a ripple of unbridled love coursing through James. He had never seen him looking so relaxed, so vulnerable, so open. In that instant, he wasn’t the leader of the Blade of Marmora, he wasn’t the Black Paladin, wasn’t a man who’d had greatness thrust upon him; he was simply Keith Kogane, the boy from the desert.

Very softly, James traced the scar on Keith’s cheek with the tip of his fingers. The knotted skin felt different, a tad rough. He’d never said where he’d gotten it. This was something James could relate to; they were both covered in scars, leftovers from the war, a visible map of the hardships they’d gone through, the price they’d willingly paid for peace. Seeing them, it was difficult to think that, only a decade ago, they’d both been competing to be the best pilot of the Garrison, never once thinking that they’d end up fighting for the freedom of the whole universe.

Keith started purring. The sound was low enough at first that James didn’t quite catch it. When it got louder, his alpha pride surged. He didn’t move, certain that the hammering of his heart against his ribs would wake Keith up. Purring from an omega meant contentment. It meant they were unconsciously feeling safe. James had never imagined Keith could purr, especially not because of _him_.

No, it couldn’t be quite wholly because of him. They were in a warm bed, away from danger, surely that had to count for something. Keith had no reason to feel safe with James. Still, it did feel nice. It made James want to hug him, just hold him until they had to get up.

He didn’t dare. Even as his alpha side snarled at him to stop being weak, he carefully pulled away. He smothered his base instincts that egged him on, urging him to touch Keith because, surely, he was willing if he was purring that much. James felt sick at that thought. There were days he hated being an alpha. It was like he had two personalities warring for supremacy inside his head. It didn’t help that he’d been raised thinking it was his right as an alpha to take whatever he wanted. He almost heard the voice of his father telling him that whatever Keith got, he’d brought it upon himself. There used to be a time when James had been young enough and easily impressible to have believed his father. He used to think omegas were weak, beneath alphas, that they existed solely for the satisfaction of those stronger. Back then, he’d probably have followed his father’s advice and touched Keith without his permission.

He couldn’t, not anymore. He wasn’t like that, not with omegas nor with anyone else. Not with Keith, not when Keith was asleep and unable to consent to anything.

Keith would kill him, anyway, and James would deserve it a hundred times over. Omegas weren’t weak, and he’d like to see his father trying to touch Keith without his permission—he’d been lying in a puddle of his own blood on the floor faster than he could think.

Finally free of the other man’s grip, James got up and pulled the blankets up Keith’s body, careful not to touch him. Keith grumbled without protesting, the purring slowly dying out.

This wasn’t good for James’ heart. He liked that side of Keith, probably as much as he liked his rougher, warrior side. Truly he had to be a defective alpha to appreciate this kind of things.

He went to the living room and silently made the coffee that Keith had thoughtfully brought. (Coffee was the one Earth commodity he couldn’t live without apparently and James thanked him for his foresight.) While he waited, he browsed through the notifications and updates he’d received on his phone. He tried keeping abreast of everything that was happening on Earth, knowing he might be sent to intervene or aid in the near future. There was always trouble arising—it didn’t matter that a third of the population had been wiped out by the Galras, they still found excuses to fight amongst each other or steal from each other or destroy what others had built.

Afterward, he studied the schedule Captain Shirogane had followed during his visit on Mizipra. It was more of the same, visiting touristic attractions and ambling around. Judging from the reports he’d sent Commander Iverson, nothing had come to his attention. It was all bland, tame. Staring at it, James felt uncertainty unfold. He didn’t have the faintest idea where to look for the older man. He had no idea what might have happened to him. There was nothing in the material Commander Iverson had sent them that helped. Even Keith, who certainly knew the captain best of them all, didn’t understand. For the moment, it seemed that their meagre hope rested on Assmiya and Assilsa, and James didn’t like the idea of relying on the locals who might or might not have a hand in the captain’s disappearance.

He’d exchanged a few words with other notables of the Coalition to inquire about their knowledge of Mizipra, but so far, this had yielded nothing. Keith had also come back mostly empty-handed when it came to the Blade of Marmora’s intelligence on the planet. According to them, it had been around for millennia, never taking part into anything, glad to remain on their own in the middle of their vastly empty galaxy. They weren’t a warrior people, their technology was far from being advanced, they didn’t meddle. Even Emperor Zarkon had never thought to turn his gaze to Mizipra. They had very little to recommend themselves except for the pretty colours of their landscapes.

Mizipra had entered the Coalition mostly by accident. A refugee ship had crashed on its surface and the Miziprans had helped the survivors. They’d built a radio to call for help. A rescue party had been sent after a long while during which the survivors had time to check out the local flora and fauna. They’d discovered that the arable lands’ yield was great, which had led to Mizipra offering those lands to the Coalition as a sort of payment for entry. _Why_ they had joined in the first place was unclear, however. Perhaps it was, as they claimed, because they wanted to learn about other species’ mating habits. In five short years, Mizipra had become the bread basket of the Coalition and a well sought-out vacation spot.

Nothing in this explained why Commander Iverson would have sent Captain Shirogane, which only reinforced James’ suppositions that the captain had come here of his own volition. Still, he didn’t want to dismiss Keith’s misgivings. Keith knew the captain the best—if he said it was unlike him to come here, James had to listen.

He got up to get himself another cup of coffee and spotted Sven standing shyly by his bedroom door, thumb tucked in his mouth. He looked hesitant to come into the living room, probably unsure how to behave without Keith around.

James put his mug down and smiled at the boy. “Good morning, Sven. Did you sleep well?”

“Dada?”

“Your father’s asleep. You can go to him if you like.”

Sven glanced towards the half-closed door of the master bedroom. He shook his head and, overcoming his shyness, came into the living room and climbed on the couch. His black hair was adorably tousled from sleep. James realised he had a plush toy tucked under one arm.

“Would you like some breakfast? There’s still…” James looked at the odd fruits they’d tucked away in the small fridge the night before. “Grapes, I guess.”

Sven considered the offer seriously before nodding. The way he nodded grandly, like he was some sort of king granting a courtier a favour, made James smile. He took out the container of grape-like fruits and, using a small knife, cut the round fruits into smaller quarters. Sven watched him work intently. When he took the proffered plate, he nodded again his approval, and James patted his hair with a smile.

He ate a few pieces before holding out one to James. “It’s for me?” At Sven’s nod, he took it and ate it. “Thanks, it’s delicious. Do you know what those are called?”

Sven considered the question. He said: “ _Uel_.”

James blinked. “ _Yuel_?”

A giggle. “No! _Uel_.”

“U-el.”

“Yes! It’s _uel_.”

“Ah. Is that the Galran word?”

Sven shrugged.

“Okay. Teach me another word.” James pointed at the table. “What’s that?”

“Table.”

James burst into laughter. “In Galran, poppet. I know the English word.”

Sven looked at him, decided the laughter wasn’t directed at him, and smiled toothily. “ _Ksaeg_.”

“ _Skaegh_.”

Another peel of laughter that made James smile in return. Okay, he was perhaps exaggerating his mispronunciation, but damn, he was willing make a fool of himself just to hear that kid’s laugh. It was free and happy and genuine. Sven was a happy, carefree child, proof that he was being raised lovingly by loving people.

They played that game for another ten minutes, James pointing and Sven saying the name of the object in Galran. Whether the names were right or were merely garbled sounds Sven made to amuse himself, James didn’t know. He played along, repeating, putting his serious face on.

He learned that Keith was _dada_ , Keith’s mother was _nana_ , both Zethrid and Ezor were _tata_ , and other members of the Blades were _unke_. The words made sense in English, so James guessed they were a mix of both languages Sven spoke.

“And dada is?” James prompted.

Sven scrunched up his face and said: “Keef.”

James tried not to laugh. “Kei- _th_.”

“Keess.” Sven pointed at the door of the bedroom. He then pointed at James. “Jamzes.”

Holy shit, so much sweetness was going to rot his teeth. James’ cheeks hurt from smiling so much. “Yeah, that’s about it, poppet.”

Once all the fruit morsels were eaten, Sven grabbed Keith’s tablet that had been left on the coffee table and fumbled with it. James helped him turn it on, relieved that it wasn’t password protected. The wallpaper, half-covered by icons, was a photograph of Keith’s mother, Krolia, holding a baby Sven, a half-smile on her face as she looked at the camera. Sven had to be a few days old on the photo, skin still blotchy and eyes closed in sleep. It was an oddly… sentimental photograph, oddly sentimental for Keith.

Sven apparently knew what to do next so James left him to it. He put the dishes away and poured himself a cup of coffee. Looking out the window, he saw that last night’s mild rain had relented, leaving the landscape shiny with dew. This reminded him of his late night trek through the mist, and he shivered, trying not recall why he’d had to leave the hut in the first place. His fingers itched for his phone that he’d left on the nightstand, safely out of reach.

“Dada!”

James turned to see Keith standing in the bedroom door frame. The man looked half-asleep, eyes lidded, hair hanging in a tangled mess around his face, clothes rumpled. He had the appearance of someone waking up from a long, restive sleep, and James recalled how he’d cuddled to him during the night.

His freshly-poured mug of coffee taunted him. He needed the fuel and bitterness. Instead of drinking it, he handed it to Keith. Steam rose from the dark liquid, accompanied by the tantalizing aroma of grounded coffee beans. Keith paused, considered him a second, and took the proffered cup. Their fingers touched for the briefest of second.

“Thanks,” Keith mumbled, taking a sip. He grimaced. “Crap, it’s bitter. No sugar?”

“None.”

Keith threw him a look like he’d insulted his mother. He went to the counter, took the sugar bowl, and dumped three huge spoonful into the cup that he stirred lazily. James’ teeth hurt.

“Dada,” Sven said when Keith sat beside him on the couch. “I teach Jamzes Galran.”

Keith laughed. He ruffled his son’s hair before throwing an amused glance at James. “Did you now, baby?”

James puffed up with pride. “Yes. I learned that _ksaeg_ means table.”

“Hmm, it does. I see you’ve been making friends with James, Sven. That’s good.”

“Jamzes is nice,” Sven said seriously. He grinned at James like they shared a secret.

James smiled back, eyes riveted on Keith, waiting for his comment on this. He realised he was sweating under his shirt and that his hands were suddenly clammy. Keith observed him over the rim of the coffee mug. His look was so intent that James _knew_ he was aware of his expectation.

“Yes, James’ nice,” Keith said thoughtfully. “Much nicer than he used to be.”

-

“You’ve had your head in the clouds since last night,” Keith commented. “Spit it out. What’s going on?”

James looked at Keith, surprised by the question. He considered it, unsure whether he should answer or not.

They were following trail number six. It was called a _hiking_ trail, although hiking usually implied more mountainous terrain and this place was pretty flat. There weren’t any kind of mountains on Mizipra, only hills and quite a lot of hillocks. Still, the towering trees were beautiful, huge and in all shades of blues. Weird-looking birds sang foreign songs high over their head. The track was smooth, well-traveled. The smells of wet earth and dewy grass were enchanting, relaxing.

Keith had left Sven with Zethrid and Ezor, something James had found quite disconcerting. He didn’t know the two women, but neither seemed very… parental. Though Ezor was nice in her way, she was an airhead. As for Zethrid, well, James couldn’t stand her. She had tried killing Keith five years ago. Keith might act like nothing had happened, James still couldn’t forgive her. Despite his misgivings however, he had no say in the matter—Sven was Keith’s son and he wouldn’t put him in harm’s way. Judging by the way Sven had thrown himself into Ezor’s arms, it was easy to see he trusted her.

“It won’t affect the mission,” James said stiffly.

He winced inwardly at his own brisk, dismissive tone. He honestly had no idea what to do about the Alex situation, and it seemed that talking about it with Keith, of all people, wouldn’t help. He didn’t want to sound bitter or whiny or desperate, even if he kind of was. His feelings had been oscillating between bitterness and desperation since last night. He didn’t know what to do. There was no guidebook that dictated the rules of a breakup that he could follow, nothing to hide behind. For the moment, he could hide behind his duty as an excuse not to think. Soon, when the mission was accomplished, he wouldn’t have that anymore, and he’d have to think. At least then he’d have Ryan’s shoulder to cry on and a bar near enough happy to supply all the alcohol he’d need.

“Right,” Keith replied stiffly too.

He sounded offended.

James said nothing. He pushed on.

The trail they were following zigzagged through a large forest. The path was very well delimitated, making it impossible for visitors to get lost. The vegetation was lush and thick, healthy. It was beautiful, if somewhat still odd to see trees with blue leaves and flowers the shapes of which couldn’t be found on Earth. James focused on the weird landscape as he walked, his boots crunching on small pebbles. The air was humid under the canopy and he was already sweating lightly under his jacket. Despite this, the brisk walk felt good. He wasn’t used to dragging his feet for days. Normally, he visited the gym every day to train or, failing that, joined the cadets for their morning run around the Garrison buildings.

Keith was like him in that regard. He too had been getting restless. Judging by the lean muscles of his body, he still trained as hard as before, so sitting on his hands here must have been annoying.

Captain Shirogane had apparently followed this trail too. They kept their eyes peeled, but James wasn’t certain what they could expect to find. It had been weeks since the man’s disappearance. If he’d dropped something, what were the chances they’d stumble upon it? Still, there was nothing else to do. At least the exercise was good.

The map of the compound indicated that hiking the trail took about three hours, which was why they hadn’t brought Sven. The boy couldn’t walk that long and carrying him wouldn’t be comfortable for anyone.

They were perhaps halfway done when Keith stopped, cocking his head. James slowed his steps too, listening, puzzled. For a moment, he couldn’t hear anything but the gentle singing of the birds and the light wind ruffling the leaves. Then he heard it: a scratching sound. It came from the forest, away from the path they’d been following. Muffled by the thick foliage, it was difficult to pinpoint its exact location.

“What’s that?” Keith asked in a low voice.

“Sounds like… digging.”

“Why would anyone be digging in the middle of a forest?”

They exchanged a look. James knew his expression was reflected on Keith’s face: excitement. It could be nothing. Most likely it was nothing, just a wood critter burrowing or a small animal scratching at the soil. But they’d been here three days and it was the first time something slightly out of the ordinary was happening.

The pamphlet warned the visitors to remain on the path at all time.

They stepped into the undergrowth eagerly. Small bushes barely hindered their progress. Tiny branches scratched at their pant legs. The low-hanging branches were inches above their head. Keith obviously took the lead and James followed him. He activated a tracker on his phone to mark the place where they’d stepped off the path to be sure to find it later. He could tell Keith hadn’t thought about it; Keith would just shrug if they got lost and manage to retrace their steps easily nonetheless.

The further away from the path they strayed, the darker the forest turned. The thick canopy overhead blocked the already weak sunlight. The humid air clung to the back of their throat. The smells of rotting leaves and soggy earth became less enchanting. The underbrush was thankfully sparse, which made it easy to push through.

Soon, James had to narrow his eyes against the encroaching gloom. It wasn’t scary, just unsettling. Half an hour away was civilization, yet here, it felt as if they were trekking on an uninhabited planet, all alone. James realised what had his nerves thrumming was exhilaration, not fear.

Why did he feel so alive only when he broke the rules?

They paused frequently to listen to the sound that had attracted them in the first place. It came again, closer, a scratching noise, except that now it sounded like many shovels digging into the ground rather than only one. James was familiar with this sound for having toiled often alongside refugees to dig foundations. There wasn’t always mechanical tools to be had and, more often than not, they had to use the good old shovel.

“Holy shit, this is creepy,” Keith breathed.

Whenever they had to talk, they did so under their breath, afraid to disrupt the cool silence of the forest. It was gloomy enough now that James barely saw Keith unless they were close. They stood side by side, listening intently. They were getting nearer. Keith was right, there was something about the sound coupled with the half-darkness that sent a shiver down James’ back.

“Do you want to continue?” James asked.

He thought he caught a flash of white teeth bared in a grin. “What do you think?”

James thought Keith was crazy. James thought Keith was right.

They continued trudging through the undergrowth, minding their footsteps. Although the birds still sang, their delicate tunes no longer sounded reassuring. James tried telling himself he was being an idiot but damn, this setting was perfect for an ambush.

Keith stopped abruptly and James collided with his back.

“What are you doing?” James hissed.

“I can’t go on. There’s something.”

“You’re scared?”

“No, moron.”

Keith grabbed his wrist, pulled him forward, and extended his arm. James’ hand encountered… a wall. It was so incongruous that he had to feel around a little to realise what this was. It wasn’t a tree or a hedge. It was rough, gritty, a bit like stone. It reminded him of the material used to build the huts back on the compound. It was too dark to see properly its length, but, tilting his head back, he saw it was nearly as tall as the trees. The sound that had guided them here came clearly from the other side.

“I wonder if there’s a way to cross,” Keith said.

“Probably, but it might take us a while to find it.”

The sound of Keith’s receding footsteps was the only thing indicating that he was on the move. James followed him with an exasperated sigh. Like a hound on a scent, Keith wouldn’t let go until he found a way to cross or, failing that, he’d dig through or bomb the whole damn thing.

“Keith, what are you doing?”

“I’m going to climb that tree. Maybe we can see on the other side.”

“You’ll break your neck, you damn madman!”

Keith snorted, and James could imagine him all too well rolling his eyes. There was no stopping him. Instead of wasting his breath, James helped. Although the branches of the trees hang relatively low, they were far too thin and feeble to support the weight of a human being. James gave Keith a boost, helping him reach the nearest branch large enough to take his weight. The foliage hid him almost immediately. James heard the creaking of wood as he climbed higher. Leaves fell in a dark blue shower.

Soon, silence engulfed him again, broken only by that scratching, maddening sound.

He kept his back to the trunk, senses alert, unsure what to do with himself. Looking at the time on his phone told him they’d left the compound behind almost two hours ago. It felt like a lifetime, especially while he waited anxiously here. He kept glancing up, hoping to catch a glimpse of Keith through the thick, dark foliage. Nothing. He couldn’t even hear the creaking sound of wood. He hoped Keith didn’t fall down or hurt himself; that might be awkward to explain.

He scoffed at his own thoughts; Keith was like a cat. Not only did he appear to have nine lives, he was all deadly grace and supple body. He’d probably bounce to his feet right after taking a plunge from the treetop.

More leaves fell around him. A few small branches followed, cascading to the ground. What the hell was Keith doing up there? James looked up just in time to catch a glimpse of Keith more or less tumbling down the tree. He didn’t quite fall, but threw himself to the ground that he hit with a loud thud.

“Someone saw me!” he hissed. “We gotta get out of here!”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well, now you know.” Keith turned the pillow to its cooler side with an aggravated huff. “James, I think we might be in trouble.”
> 
> James’ sleepiness disappeared in an instant. His pulse quickened. “What’s going on?”
> 
> “When I went to fetch Sven, I met a gaggle of Miziprans. They were alphas, clearly unmated. They stopped me and asked me about my mate. I think they suspect something. One of them kept sniffing at me.”
> 
> Anger rose quickly enough inside James that it left him reeling. He sat bolt upright, staring down at Keith with gritted teeth. “What?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My vocabulary is starting to run dry! I no longer know how to thank you all for the support you're showing this story. It means so much to me!! Thank you for reading and commenting. My Sundays are made the better for it.
> 
> So! A lot happens in this chapter so buckle up! James and Keith devise a plan that would help them track Shiro and Curtis down. And they run into more trouble.
> 
> Furthermore, please note that I have bumped the rating from M to E. Things are started to get heated between Keith and James. Also, mind the tags! Afab language will be used later on in the story and I want my readers to know of it beforehand.
> 
> One last thing: I finished writing this story last week! We have a definite chapter count: 24. It means Chlorine has 281 pages, 24 chapters, and 106,909 words.
> 
> Enjoy!

They didn’t look inconspicuous at all as they exited the forest after running nearly all the way back to the compound. Both of them were covered in sweat, dirt, dried leaves, and bits of wood. Panting, they slowed their pace as soon as they reached a small group of people leaving the forest too.

James feared his heart would hammer out of his chest. Running had been fine, it was the fear that had fueled him that left him breathless. Keith had had no time to explain what he’d seen. He couldn’t help imagining some sort of armed guard coming after them, taking them into custody or throwing them in jail. There were no signs so far that they’d been followed. It meant nothing in itself of course; there might be what passed for a police force waiting to pick them up at their hut.

With other folks around, they couldn’t talk. Many aliens had apparently chosen that day to follow the trail. They were discussing amongst themselves, laughing, holding hand or the equivalent of that depending on their species. James quickly intertwined his fingers with Keith’s, pulling him close. They got a few glances alongside knowing smirks—James supposed they thought Keith and he had been rolling on the ground for a quickie. He didn’t try to delusion them; it was a plausible excuse to explain their dirty clothes. He grinned back, wrapping an arm around Keith’s waist to play the cocky alpha, hoping his dread didn’t show on his face.

It was only when they were safely inside their hut that they relaxed. They both slumped against the wall simultaneously, breathing out in relief.

James looked at Keith; skin smudged with dirt, a tiny branch stuck in his messy hair, scratches over his hands, tears in his pants, and he had to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. Nerves made him giggle like a moron, something that had always embarrassed him. Keith grinned back.

“That had to be one of less dignified exits I ever took,” he said, “and that includes all those times I ran away screaming from a bunch of Galras with Lance.”

“Dignity has no place in war, don’t worry. So, tell me, what did you see?”

Humour faded from Keith’s eyes. He straightened. “It’s difficult to explain. I only caught a brief look before I was spotted. There were no trees on the other side. It looked like vast cultivated lands.”

“Ah? But we already know the Miziprans produce a lot of food.”

“Yeah, but what was weird was that the fields were being tended by people. There was no machinery. I mean, I know they’re not very tech-savvy, but it doesn’t take a genius to build… whatever machine plows fields.”

“People? Miziprans?”

“I didn’t get a good enough look to tell.”

James hummed. “Judging by the quantity of food Mizipra produces in a month, it must take a lot of labourers to meet their quota.”

“Makes sense. What do we do now?”

“Lay low. We don’t know if that person who saw you can identify you. Was it someone in charge?”

Keith frowned, thinking. “Looked that way. Like a supervisor? They just happened to look up. I’m not even sure that they saw me, now that I think of it. They didn’t really react.”

“How about we take no chance, eh? We’ll wait until tomorrow to decide what to do next.”

Keith didn’t look very pleased by this. He kept his objections to himself however. “Good enough, I guess. Anyway, I’ll shower and then fetch Sven. I want to update Zethrid and Ezor on what we saw.”

Covered in dirt as he was, James didn’t dare sit on the couch, so he just leaned against the table to look through his phone while he waited for his turn in the shower. He kept an ear cocked to what was happening outside, still half-certain that a Mizipran police force would come to arrest them.

“Do you think Shiro might have stumbled upon that wall and got himself into trouble?” Keith asked from the bedroom.

“I don’t see why. It’s not as if it’s forbidden. We all know Mizipra has arable lands.”

Keith said something else, but his voice was muffled and James didn’t catch his comment. He stepped into the bedroom just in time to see Keith bending over to rummage under the bed, presumably to grab his bag. James’ face flushed and he rapidly turned his back. Why in hell was Keith walking around in his underwear?

“Have you seen my sweatpants?” Keith asked, still rummaging under the bed. “I swear I’ve never met a clean freak like you.”

“They’re in the drawer,” James answered, voice tight. “You haven’t changed; you were always getting into trouble at the Garrison because you’re so messy.”

“Right, and I remember you wasting your days off ironing your uniforms.”

James pretended to have been waiting by the door when Keith exited the bedroom, mercifully wearing his sweatpants.

“Why are you standing there like an idiot?”

James cleared his throat. “I’m just waiting for my turn in the shower.”

Keith eyed him curiously before shrugging and closing the bathroom door behind him.

James wanted heaved a sigh. Had it only been three days? It suddenly felt so much longer. He tried not to think about Keith in the shower while he returned his attention to his phone. He typed a quick report to send Commander Iverson about what they’d found. Would the commander be surprised or did he already know about this? James couldn’t forget that Keith was persuaded there was something sinister afoot, that the Garrison knew more than they let on.

He groaned—the last thing he wanted was to start questioning the higher-ups. He wanted to trust them, to trust they knew what they were doing, that they wouldn’t put their people in danger. Yet as he tried to convince himself, he couldn’t stop remembering Admiral Sanda and how she had made a deal with that Galra warlord Sendak behind everybody’s back. She had been one bad apple, and he didn’t want to think there might be others on the brass as rotten as her. Her motives had been pure, he tried telling himself without much success.

No, he trusted Commander Iverson. So far, the man had never led them astray. The brass trusted him. Hell, even Captain Shirogane trusted him, and James trusted the captain even if he no longer understood him.

They were back to square one then. Tomorrow, James decided, they’d check out the information centre. This was where every visitor transited through, which meant there might be something about Captain Shirogane. According to the informative pamphlet, the centre had closing hours where it would presumably be empty. It would be a good time to reconnoitre the place.

After that, if Assmiya hadn’t gotten back to him, he’d try finding them and questioning them further about the other humans that had visited the planet. For the moment, he thought the Mizipran to be their best source of information. Looking around for the captain on their own was simply dumb. They had no idea where to begin their search or what they were searching for exactly.

James thought back on what they had discovered today. The fields that were being worked felt… off, for some reason. He couldn’t put his finger on what bothered him about it. He wasn’t sure whether they had something to do with Captain Shirogane’s disappearance and, even if they didn’t, it was still weird. Maybe they should try getting another look at the place, perhaps take a few pictures to send back home to be analyzed.

He rubbed his face tiredly. As he did so, his eyes happened on the bracelet he’d received upon his arrival. It was supposed to indicate the boundaries of the areas they could access. For the moment, it was an ordinary blue colour since he was in his allocated area. He hadn’t thought to look at it when they were in the forest. Keith had said there was a chip inside, presumably a sort of tracking device to keep the visitors in check. If they could find the electronic signature of the bracelet the captain had been given, perhaps they could follow his whereabouts more easily. It was possible they could discover the exact moment where he’d been taken and, if he were still wearing it, his exact location.

Excitement bubbled. It wouldn’t be easy to accomplish; they’d have to access the compound’s database, figure out how it worked, and make sense of the information they acquired. Actually, no, no. Acquiring the information was the easiest; it could be downloaded on their phone. Then, they’d simply have to send it home to Pidge Holt or Ina who’d have a field day sifting through it all.

“Keith, I have an idea!” James exclaimed the second Keith stepped out of the bathroom.

Keith rubbed the towel over his wet hair, frowning. “About what?”

James told him what he’d just figured out. At first, Keith looked doubtful, until his eyes widened and he started looking as excited as James felt. By the end, there was even a smile on his face.

“Holy shit, that’s genius,” he commented. “Infiltrating a place and stealing their database is what I’ve been doing with the Blade for years. The Miziprans have no guns, no sentries standing guard. It’ll be a piece of cake.”

James chuckled. “Don’t get too cocky, Kogane. They might have other defense systems we don’t know about.”

“Hmpf, it’s nothing I won’t be able to deal with.”

Together, they did their best to understand the Mizipran clock in their hut to figure out how long they had until the information centre closed. According to their calculations, it was about ten hours left before closing time.

“Hm. Let’s sleep and then we’ll do this,” Keith decided.

How easily did he take control of a situation. James found he didn’t mind so much—this was Keith’s world. He knew what he was doing. He’d done this often with the Blade, and James could admit this wasn’t something he’d done before. Nevertheless, a tiny part of him was annoyed that Keith decided what to do on his own, without consulting him or asking for his opinion.

As if sensing this, Keith turned to look at him. “What?”

“Nothing.” James sighed, resigned. “It’s just… I don’t like not being in charge, that’s all.”

Keith regarded him before nodding. “That’s fair. Is it because I’m an omega?”

He’d asked the question with honest puzzlement. He didn’t want to get confrontational about this, he simply wanted to know. James found he couldn’t get angry. Instead, he took a moment to consider it carefully.

“No,” he said honestly. “I’m simply used to being the leader. I know you’re not like the other omegas. You’re… unnatural.”

The word had slipped out without his meaning to. He expected Keith to burst into angry shouting at this. Instead, he looked… amused.

“That’s a politically correct way to say things. I’ve heard worse. I’m not unnatural, Griffin. There’re a lot of omegas like me, I assure you. We humans are just narrow-minded and set in our old ways. You really think an omega like Ezor would be happy to stay home, raise children, clean, and cook for her alpha?”

“No,” James answered, flustered.

“The way humans treat second genders as a whole sucks. The suppressants, the scent blockers, it all serves to exacerbate the worst of our behaviour. Human omegas stop taking their suppressant once in a while to have a heat. Their hormones have been suppressed for so long that they go into overdrive. That’s why their heats are so powerful and incapacitating. Ever since I’ve joined the Blade, I’ve worked through my heat without problem. Sure, it’s not optimal, but it’s manageable. I never would have been able to do that before. We’re all forced to conform to certain roles merely because of an accident of birth. Do you think I’d be a better leader if I had a dick? Or if I were an alpha? You want to say yes, but I know you don’t believe it. You’ve seen it firsthand.” Keith suddenly grinned. “Would you call Shiro unnatural?”

“W-what? No!”

“Shiro’s soft, gentle, loving. Aren’t those qualities supposed to be reserved to omegas? Yet he’s the picture perfect of an alpha, at least physically. Nobody would call him unnatural for loving kids or for being nice.”

James’ mind whirled, but he understood. Keith had been strangely patient during his explanation, like he truly wanted James to understand, like he’d explained it before or had it been explained to him often.

“Sorry,” James said. “I wasn’t raised like that. It’s difficult to change.”

Keith shrugged. “You’ve already started. I remember the little James from middle school and from the Garrison who’d pushed me around and told me to get back to the kitchen. You wouldn’t give me the time of day, and yet now you respect my opinions and follow my lead.”

“It’s just—I think I—errr… okay, yeah, maybe I’ve changed a little.”

Keith smiled, a brutally, shockingly sweet smile that pierced James’ heart. “Told you so. Now, I’ll fetch Sven and tell Ezor and Zethrid they’ll have to keep an eye on him tomorrow too.”

James said nothing, too stunned by the turn of events to move. Keith left him standing there, thoughts awhirl. Belatedly he realised how close they’d been standing together while they studied the Mizipran clock. Their shoulders had been pressed one against the other, and he could still feel Keith’s warmth through his shirt. Keith had been uncharacteristically gentle it seemed. Apparently, James wasn’t the only one who’d done some growing up since their cadet days.

He showered in a daze, glad to finally be rid of the forest’s muck. He realised his hands were grazed and that there was a long, shallow gash on his right leg, perhaps an inch above where his prosthetic attached to his limb. It had bled a little, staining the white alloy a reddish colour that was thankfully washed away easily.

Keith and Sven were back when he exited the bathroom. Sven was babbling excitedly about what he’d done with his two guardians while Keith was trying to wash his face. The boy was covered in sand from head to toe since, apparently, he’d spent most of the afternoon at the beach.

The second Sven spotted him, he waved energetically at him and said something in Galran. Frowning, realising his mistake, he repeated it in English.

“I went to the beach,” he said slowly, pronouncing each word carefully.

“Did you have fun, poppet?” James asked, sitting on the couch next to him.

“Yes. Tata Ezor threw me high!” He mimed throwing an object skyward.

“And then you barfed on her,” Keith grumbled. “I told her not to do that.”

“Right,” James said, horrified at the thought of Sven being tossed around like a sack of flour. “At least you had fun.”

After that, while Keith tried to get a suddenly peeved Sven into the shower, James decided to go back to his book. There was nothing else to be done that evening and, no matter how he wracked his brain, no new idea about their current situation came. Perhaps changing his mind would do the trick. He heard Keith’s exasperated voice coming from the bathroom, and it put a small smile on his lips. Keith sounded so exasperated yet so fond as he did his best to coax his son into the shower. He truly was a good parent, a thing James never would have expected. He wondered if Keith would like more children, more little boys and girls to fuss over. Probably not. Realistically, given his job, Keith couldn’t quite afford to a gaggle a kids, especially not if he reminded single. Maybe if he settled down, but imagining him retiring was impossible.

An hour later found a sleepy-eyed Sven cuddling against his father while Keith read him a story from his tablet. James listened to the foreign cadence of the Galran words. He’d thought the language harsh, but when Keith spoke it softly, it sounded merely different. Hell, James himself was lulled by the story, his head growing heavy. He rubbed his eyes, wanting to finish another chapter of his book before going to bed.

He looked at the two others seated on their end of the couch. The scene was domestic, peaceful, utterly cute. Keith had an arm around Sven’s shoulders and Sven leaned heavily against his side, half-closed eyes on the screen of the tablet to look at the pictures.

Unthinkingly, James opened the photo app on his phone. “Keith.”

Keith looked at him, puzzled. When he saw the phone directed at him, he pouted. “What?”

James snapped the picture. He grinned. “Nothing. Just want to prove to everybody that you’re still alive and well.”

“You’re impossible.”

It was only half the truth, and James felt a tiny sting at the deception. He wanted to keep a small memento of this mission, a small something that would remind him that, once in his life, he’d cohabited peacefully with Keith. The picture was thankfully good, clear, Keith’s pout beyond adorable. There was no aggression in his features, no ghosts in his eyes. He looked soft and comfortable and fatherly.

James wondered why he liked torturing himself so much.

Not wanting this to be a total lie, he did send the pictures to Nadia, who’d been asking yet again if Keith and he had come to blows yet. Her answer, when it came, made him blush.

[Nadia] _Holy shit James, you’re so in love with that guy it’s disgusting!_

He quickly closed the texting app, sure that Keith would somehow be able to read the message from the other side of the couch.

When Keith didn’t magically guess what he’d been saying to Nadia, he returned his attention to the phone. He angled it away from the other to look yet again at the picture, cheeks flushed.

“I certainly hope you aren’t looking at porn.”

James jumped, looking up quickly. Keith was getting to his feet, collecting a sleeping Sven into his arms. “W-w-what?!”

“Shh! He’s finally sleeping!” Keith rolled his eyes. “Your face’s all red, that’s all.”

“I’m not—I would never… I-I’m reading a book!” He turned the screen towards Keith. “See?!”

“Right. Must be quite a steamy book. Anyway, good night.”

With a groan, James threw his phone on the cushion next to him and slumped. What was Keith going to think of him now?

“You know I wouldn’t read that kind of stuff, right?” he told Keith once they’d gone to bed. “At least not in your presence.”

They were both lying on their back, looking at the ceiling. It was… uncomfortable for the first time since they’d arrived here. James couldn’t quite put his finger on what had changed. He doubted this had to do with the book he’d been reading.

Keith tugged at the blankets. “And you know I really wouldn’t care either way, right?”

“No, I don’t know. I barely know you, Keith.”

“Well, now you know.” Keith turned the pillow to its cooler side with an aggravated huff. “James, I think we might be in trouble.”

James’ sleepiness disappeared in an instant. His pulse quickened. “What’s going on?”

“When I went to fetch Sven, I met a gaggle of Miziprans. They were alphas, clearly unmated. They stopped me and asked me about my mate. I think they suspect something. One of them kept sniffing at me.”

Anger rose quickly enough inside James that it left him reeling. He sat bolt upright, staring down at Keith with gritted teeth. “What?!”

“Lower your voice, bloody hell!” Keith hissed. He threw his hands up in exasperation. “What did you think would happen, eh? Did you really believe, for one minute, that those guys would believe we’re a couple? They _know_ couples, and even if they didn’t, we don’t act like one. Any alpha sniffing after me can smell that I’m unbounded and that you’ve never scented me. What other conclusion could they achieve but that we’re lying to them? Sure, not having sex can be somewhat explained, but not the scenting. Couples do it all the time.”

James curbed his anger at the thought that some upstart alpha had looked twice at Keith. He needed to cool his head to think clearly. Keith was right, this could mean trouble. The Miziprans were adamant that only couples were allowed on their planet. Keith and James being found out either meant expulsion or suspicion, both of which would ruin their mission. Commander Iverson had been so damn naïve to think they could fool people easily.

“What do you suggest? Maybe I could lend you one of my shirts—”

“Scent me,” Keith said quickly.

James’ eyes widened. He stared down at the other, flabbergasted, unable to find the words to form an answer.

Scenting was quite intimate between an alpha and omega. It meant rubbing one’s scent on the other, an act that wasn’t unlike laying claim. Packs did it unconsciously by living in close quarters. James’ own scent had been all over his friends all the time during the invasion—they were all betas and he was claiming them as his, as part of his pack. Due to his alpha and leader status, he’d been head of the pack. Anybody approaching them had known, with a sniff, they were already part of a family.

The same thing had been true of the Paladins—James remembered thinking how Keith reeked of Captain Shirogane and Álvarez that time they’d been together in his jet. Even with the scent blockers, their smells had been over him, and Keith’s scent had surely been over them too.

The way things were right now, James imagined Keith smelled only very faintly of him, the way a roommate sharing living quarters would. The fact that he used scent blockers certainly made it worse. To those attuned to this, they surely interpreted the situation as Keith and James doing nothing more than living in the same hut. This wasn’t the typical behaviour for a young couple of any species on vacations. No surprise the Miziprans were getting suspicious.

Scenting in a couple was a different matter. Usually, a person wasn’t content with a mere whiff of their companion. They wanted to smell like their significant other. It was especially true of young couples who’d just gotten together. It was a proclamation of love much more than it was a claim.

“Keith, are you sure?” James asked. His throat had gone dry. His pulse throbbed. “It might take a long time to wash out.”

Stubbornness painted itself over Keith’s features. “It doesn’t matter. It’s just a smell. It’s not forever, it’s not a bond.”

“Yes, but still… I know you want to do anything in your power to save Captain Shirogane… I just…”

_I don’t want it to happen this way. I don’t want you to feel forced._

His alpha side urged him on, battering inside his brain with the urge to finally lay claim to his long-time crush. He closed his eyes, silencing it.

“Have you ever done it before?” At Keith’s shake of the head, James continued, regaining a bit of his cool: “You don’t know how it is. You’ll feel… drawn to me. It’s not a bond, that’s true, that doesn’t mean it isn’t… binding either. It can take a long time to fade, especially if we keep living together and redoing it.”

There was slight colouring to Keith’s cheeks. James’ stomach was in knots. He could hardly think over the pounding of blood in his ears.

Keith took in a deep breath. “Do it. It’s not a bond, it’ll fade after a while.”

“It might put off other alphas.”

“Isn’t that the point?”

“Even after the mission. Other alphas might smell me on you for a long time.”

“You think I care what alphas think?! I don’t!”

James narrowed his eyes. “Are you _sure_?”

Keith rubbed his hands over his face. He gazed at the ceiling before turning his attention to James fully. “Yes. I know you’re acting this way to protect me. You don’t have to. I’m old enough to make my own decisions.” He seemed to think of something. His eyes softened. “Unless _you_ don’t want to. I didn’t think of that. Maybe you have someone waiting for you at home.”

James snorted. He thought of his small room at the Garrison, of his empty single bed, of his lonely weekends, of his meaningless trysts in town once in a while. He thought of Alex who’d written _I miss you_ after months of cruel silence.

“No, I don’t.”

They stared at each other for long seconds. James relaxed a little. He could tell Keith was certain, that he wouldn’t go back on his decision. And James was powerless in front of him. He might be an alpha, he had no power whatsoever over this particular omega. Keith wanted and James scrambled to give.

He stopped thinking. Keith was still lying down so James leaned over him. His mind had gone curiously blank, allowing him to act on instinct. First he pressed his lips to Keith’s briefly, tentatively, giving the other one more chance to change his mind. Keith didn’t push him back. In fact, he wrapped his arms around James’ neck, pulling him closer, opening his mouth willingly. His lips were plush and warm and moist, eager. The contact sent an adrenaline rush coursing down James’ spine. He slipped one hand under Keith’s neck, deepening the kiss. Keith moaned softly, back arching a bit, fingers tightening in James’ hair almost painfully. Their tongues met, and soon their teeth were nipping at their swollen lips.

James could have spent the entire night kissing Keith. Time and again he pulled back to breathe before diving in, Keith tugging him back down hastily. The air was growing hot between them, heated almost to the point of no return. James pulled back to litter small kisses all over Keith’s sharp jaw, tasting the skin. He followed the line of his neck, kissing and nipping, leaving traces that would take days to fade. Keith’s breaths came in gasps, intertwined with moans. James reached that spot beneath his ear where his smell was strongest. He nuzzled at it with relish, drinking in the scent. Keith gasped, tightening his grip around James’ neck.

It was there he’d bite if they wanted to bond. James’ teeth grazed the skin, torturing himself. He could tell this was torture for Keith too—he was whining and moaning, incoherent words leaving his parted lips. His fingers dug almost painfully into James’ scalp, pressing his face to his neck.

He was hard enough in his pants for it to be painful. He could tell Keith was aroused too, could smell it in the air, could taste it on the sweat of his skin. Keith grabbed his hand that wasn’t under his neck and tugged it under the blankets, down his chest, down his belly to the spot between his legs that was already drenched. He grinded down on James’ hand, moaning, and James had to kiss him to silence him lest they wake Sven up.

There was too much lusty fog in his brain to even think of stopping. Keith seemed to want it and James never, ever wanted to deny him anything. He slid his hand down Keith’s pants, the two of them shuddering at the same time. Keith was wet already, dripping in his panties. James slipped two fingers inside him easily. Keith grinded on the fingers, his wet heat squeezing down. James wanted to tear the blankets off him, shove his pants down, and fuck him until he cried. This wasn’t what Keith wanted however, and James was happy enough to provide. Keith’s barely muffled moans were beautiful, his panting gorgeous, his hot kisses addictive. James would have gratefully spent the night kissing him, fingering him, teasing him, but he could tell Keith was already nearing his peak. His breathing became laboured. His voice got higher in pitch. His body tensed. When he came, his back arched off the bed and he barely had the time to muffle his shout. He whimpered as James kept thrusting his fingers into him, prolonging the climax.

Keith slumped back on the mattress with a shuddering sigh. His face was flushed and his lips were swollen and red. There were pretty marks all over the slender white column of his neck.

James carefully pulled his fingers back. They were drenched. He made sure that Keith was looking and put them to his mouth, licking the slick off his skin. Keith’s eyes darkened. James grinned.

He should have known Keith wouldn’t be undone. One second he was sitting up, the next he was on his back with Keith looming over him. Black hair tangled, face red, lips swollen, eyes dark with lust, neck littered with hickeys, their scents mingling flawlessly, he was like an apparition out of a dream. James’ breath caught in his throat. His erection throbbed painfully, tenting the front of his pants. Keith’s eyes went to it.

“Keith, you don’t have to—”

Grinning, looking at him straight in the eye, Keith shoved his hand down James’ pants. His fingers closed around his dick. The pressure was amazing. James’ hips twitched, bucking up in that tight hold. Keith squeezed and began moving his hand up and down slowly, gaging James’ reactions. They both knew he wouldn’t last long, but Keith didn’t know it was his fault. He didn’t know the effect he had on James, didn’t know the mere sight of him was enough to send his mind reeling.

It didn’t last long. The fiery coil inside James’ belly exploded. His vision went white as pleasure erupted, frying all his senses. When his consciousness returned to him, he realised that Keith was leaning over him, nuzzling at his neck. Shakily, James ran his fingers through Keith’s hair, marveling at its lush softness.

Keith slumped beside him, accepting the arm wrapped around his shoulders. They remained unmoving for a moment, both catching their breaths. Reality reasserted itself. James kept expecting to be horrified or ashamed. He’d just kissed Keith, scented him, _fingered_ him, and had received a hand job in return, and all he felt was dumb satiety. Perhaps his brain had fried in his skull.

“Well, you’re no Shiro, but you’re not too bad,” Keith said pleasantly, inching closer.

James snorted. “Thanks, I guess. Sorry I’m not built like a brick house.”

“Stop that. You’re not as lanky and grumpy as you were before.”

James closed his eyes, nuzzling his nose into Keith’s soft hair. “Captain Shirogane is Sven’s father, isn’t he?”

He’d always known it, at the back of his mind, he realised. He’d simply never wanted to admit it to himself.

Keith didn’t tense against him. He remained silent for a moment, for so long that James started worrying he might have offended him by voicing the obvious.

“Yes,” he said softly. “It was a mistake. We were on New Altea. We were missing Allura and we were tipsy. We talked for hours in my room. It just… happened.”

James hesitated. “What about…”

“He _wasn’t_ with Curtis. They were… I don’t know, friends with benefits back then. They weren’t together. I’d never have done that if Shiro was with anyone and he’d never have cheated on his partner.”

“I know,” James soothed, knowing this was the truth. “Does he know about Sven?”

“No. Hell, no. By the time I realised I was pregnant, Shiro had started dating Curtis. I probably wouldn’t have told him either way. He’d have felt it his duty to be involved and I didn’t want him to.” Keith heaved a sigh. “Why am I even telling you this?”

“It’s the scenting. You’re not used to it. It’s making you more… open. You sense I’m trustworthy.”

“Shit, I didn’t know about that side-effect.”

“Do you regret it?”

Keith paused before shrugging. “No. It’s just… weird, I guess. We should sleep.” When James made to let him go, Keith latched on. “Like that!”

“What? You want to snuggle?”

“It’s cold!”

“Okay, okay, pet, don’t fuss.”

“I hate you.”

“Right, your wet panties tell another story.”

“Shut up or you’ll sleep on the couch.”

James chuckled. “No way.” He grinned. “You’re _purring_.”

Keith made a noise at the back of his throat, half denial and half annoyance. He said nothing, letting the quiet purring do the talking for him.

They remained like that for a blissful moment, long enough that James’ mind began to drift. He knew not to read too much into this; their hormones had gone into overdrive. This meant nothing. They had only satisfied their bodily needs the way tons of adults did all the time.

“I need to shower again,” Keith grumbled, rolling away from him.

Even after he’d left the room, James remained aware of his presence, perfectly tuned to his scent. It oozed through the walls of the hut. It had soaked into the bedsheets, into James’ clothes. There was no longer any denying that they’d scented each other. Nobody would dare accuse them of not being a real couple now or, if they did, they’d have no proof of their claim.

If only they were a real couple.

James refused to let himself sink into despair. They might not be a couple, but they had shared something huge tonight. Mere friends didn’t scent each other like that and certainly didn’t put their hand into each other’s pants. Whatever they were didn’t need a name. Keith trusted him, and it meant more to James than any kind of relationship he could hope for.

If anything, it was one more tiny step into the right direction.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zethrid snorted, attempting to stifle her bark of laughter. “That’s not it, little alpha! You think I’m blind? You think I don’t see how you look at him?”
> 
> James gritted his teeth. She towered over him, looming, and yet he wanted to punch her, strike that grinning, knowing smile off her face. His cheeks burned. Humiliation coursed through him. _Little alpha_. Who did she think she was, that dumb Galra mercenary? Did she think she was better simply because she was a hulking slab of muscles?
> 
> “Oh, you’re getting angry, I like that,” Zethrid continued, amused. “Not that much of a ninny, are you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there, folk! Thank you so very much for all those marvellous comments left on the previous chapter! You make me incredibly happy!
> 
> Also, we have two amazing drawings of Alex! Please, look at them! They are so gorgeous! Thanks to tricodeku who's designed him so gorgeously!
> 
>  
> 
> [Look at this gorgeous picture of Alex Rei has drawn!](https://twitter.com/bttomkeith/status/1133853359524470784//)
> 
>  
> 
> [Look at this gorgeous picture of Alex Robin has drawn!](https://twitter.com/mattywriter/status/1133176774974758917)

James had expected the morning to be awkward. He expected shy glances between Keith and him, perhaps disgust or dismay (at least on Keith’s part). He feared the other would regret what they’d done or, worse, be angry at James for allowing it to happen.

It was quite the opposite. Keith was already up and about when James joined him in the living room. He offered him a smile, no more awkward or shy or interested than before. It was like nothing had changed. James wondered if he should be hurt by this before realising he was being childish. It was like hoping for more after greeting your one-night stand in the morning.

They’d planned on going to the information centre right after it had closed but, as it turned out, Sven decided to be difficult. He fussed, suddenly not wanting to spend another day with Ezor and Zethrid. He wanted to remain with Keith. He kept hugging his legs, refusing to be moved to get dressed. Keith sighed. He tried explaining that _dada_ had something important to do. Sven was three however and he didn’t understand. Nobody could fault him for this—to a child there was nothing more important than their parents and they surely expected the sentiment to be reciprocated.

For some reason, James kept expecting Keith to get annoyed and simply force Sven to conform. He’d read somewhere that letting your kids win an argument wasn’t a good idea. Instead, Keith picked his son up and cuddled him, resting his cheek on top of Sven’s mop of black hair.

“Do you mind going with Zethrid instead?” he asked James.

“Uh.”

Yes, he did mind going with Zethrid. He didn’t trust her, didn’t even like her. He didn’t want to have anything to do with her. He just couldn’t say so to Keith, not when he was busy consoling his fussing son.

_That’s his place, staying at home with the kids while you take care of business._

Holy shit, what he wouldn’t do for Keith and his doe eyes.

“No, I don’t mind, I’ll go.”

“Thanks. I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with him.”

“Don’t apologize, it’s fine,” James assured quickly. “Sven’s probably tired. It’s normal for him to want to stay with his father.”

“I suppose.” Keith threw him a wry look. “You know, for someone who called me unnatural last night, you sure are unnatural for an alpha yourself.”

“W-what?”

“Not many alphas care for their kids, and even fewer care for the kids of others.”

“It’s because he’s your kid,” James blurted out.

“No. You said you also care for Kinkade’s children too. Don’t look so abashed, jeez, it’s not a bad thing. Anyway. Go to Zethrid and talk to her about your plan. She’ll know what to do.”

And so James obeyed.

He was still a bit stunned as he made his way to the hut shared by the two Galra women. It was very quiet around him. The birds had all gone to sleep in their nest. The other visitors were either settling down for the night or resting in their hut. There was the sound of lively music coming from a distant building.

He was starting to be annoyed by the never-setting suns. They hung low in the sky, a false promise of a night that never came. He missed sleeping in darkness. The reddish glow that seeped into the bedroom was creepy, not helpful to sleep. Red was better than purple, but not by much. Despite liking to spend time with Keith, he was starting to look forward to going home already.

Except that going home certainly meant parting ways with Keith. They would both go back to their lives after this brief pause, go back to their duties. Since Keith never visited Earth, when would they see each other? Would Keith even want to see him again? For the scenting had certainly turned his feelings a little; his instincts would urge him to seek James out, the spend time with him. It would all fade with time until he was back to his old self, not the worse for wear. He’d probably call it a temporary lapse of judgement brought on by raging hormones.

James didn’t like that scenario much. Keith would leave and forget him, and James would be left pining once more. This time however he’d have even more vivid memories to keep him company at night. Not only had he kissed Keith, he’d also fingered him _and_ gotten a hand job in exchange.

Shit, he couldn’t think about this right now or he’d get horny.

He reached the hut Zethrid and Ezor shared. He knocked on the door, feeling awkward. He didn’t know them, how was he supposed to be working with them? Maybe he should have insisted he got with Keith despite what Sven wanted. He was a kid, he shouldn’t be having his way.

“Hey, it’s the little alpha,” Zethrid commented, opening the door.

His annoyance was nearing anger. He gritted his teeth. Fuck, he hated being called little or short or small. He knew he wasn’t big for an alpha, why did everybody have to remind him of this all the time? Judging by the grin on Zethrid’s face, she had guessed it

Ezor poked her head out. “Oh, Jamie! Hi! You were missing us?”

Then, almost as one, their eyes widened. They leaned towards him, taking a sniff. He had to resist the urge to lean back. Of course they’d smelled their boss on him. He tried not to blush. He stood taller, crossing his arms over his chest to show he wouldn’t be intimidated. Ezor and Zethrid were part of Keith’s new pack, it was possible they’d be feeling possessive of him. Zethrid especially, being an alpha, would have the instinct to protect her omega boss.

“Did you and the boss finally do the do?!” Ezor asked excitedly.

Zethrid glowered at him while he tried to muster the courage to answer. “N-No. I just scented him. There were alphas sniffing after him.”

“Aww. Well, you should do it, it might do him good. It’s been years since he’s had an alpha in his bed.”

James’ face burned. Were they really discussing Keith’s personal life on the threshold? “That’s… that’s too much information.”

Zethrid snorted. “Why are you here then if not to ask how to do him properly?”

“I don’t need tips from you!” James exclaimed, stung. He took in a breath to calm himself. “Keith sends me. He has a mission for us.”

Quickly, after making sure there was nobody around to hear, he explained what Keith and he had discussed last night. Zethrid lost her bored expression as she listened intently, a smile slowly stretching her lips. Keith had said she was getting bored with the lack of action; no doubt she was relishing having finally something tangible to do.

“Sounds great,” she said. She cracked her knuckles. “Let’s do it!”

James dreaded the hours to come. They were supposed to remain inconspicuous, yet Zethrid was gearing up as if to jump into a battle. He feared she’d throw punches and ask questions later.

After the two women had kissed goodbye (for like ten minutes, like they wouldn’t see each other for weeks rather than for a few hours), they made their way towards the information centre. Zethrid walked quickly, her long legs forcing James to hurry his step uncomfortably to keep up. The air of potency that whirled around her was terrifying. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to reign her in if she decided to go berserk.

They didn’t enter the information centre building right away. They circled around it a few times, walking leisurely, acting like they were merely looking around. They did so separately in case someone noticed them and thought to ask why two alphas who apparently didn’t know each other were taking a stroll together. James kept an eye on Zethrid in the distance, sure that he’d see her rush into the building at the first occasion. Mercifully, she seemed to want to go with the plan for the moment.

The area around was quiet. There wasn’t any hut near the centre. James spotted a few couples walking in the good distance, all of them with their back to him. This seemed to be the down time on Mizipra. Unlike James and Keith who’d decided to live by Earth’s time, some visitors chose to follow the Mizipran schedule. It was good for James; it meant they wouldn’t be around the information centre to witness what he was planning.

He used the same app he’d previously used at the hut to find if bugs had been planted. Angling his phone towards the centre, he scanned for any electronics. The screen didn’t light up nearly as much as he had expected. He’d feared security cameras or proximity scans or any other surveillance system. According to the read out, there was… nothing. Only a few small white dots blinked lazily, indicating what had to be a few computers. It all came from inside. Even the doors weren’t locked automatically.

He wondered if this was weird. After so many years of unrest, James had come to find peace odd. Back before the Galra invasion, in his youth, he remembered a world untouched by strife where he could leave the front door unlocked and not fear for his security. Now, everything rotated around secure perimeters, identity checks, password-protected exchanges, verified hailing frequencies. It no longer seemed normal that a species would be so… trusting. He understood the Miziprans hadn’t known war, but surely, they’d had internal conflicts. True peace didn’t exist. There had to be thieves and murderers and rapists in their midst.

He shook his head. This line of thought served no purpose. He’d question the Miziprans’ living habits later. Now, he simply had to be thankful they were so trusting—it did make his life simpler.

And when had his life been simple in the past five years?

He rejoined with Zethrid half an hour later, both satisfied with what they’d seen. Zethrid thrummed with excitement beside him as they made their unhurried way towards the closed doors of the centre. James kept watch while she fumbled with a lock-pick then, deciding this was wasting too much time, she broke the door handle. Her huge fist closed around it and it crumbled under her impressive strength.

“Great, now nobody will know this door was forced,” James grumbled sarcastically.

Zethrid scoffed. The door swung open noiselessly and they slipped inside.

The large, cavernous room felt gloomy with all the lights turned off. They paused for a moment, allowing their eyes to adjust. They looked around for a moment, trying to figure out where to start their search. The place was featureless except for a sort of high counter. Everything else was all smooth walls and clean floor. The other doors leading to the outside were also locked.

It took them long minutes before they figured out that the computers James had detected were discreetly hidden behind a false wall. They had to stand almost parallel to it to see the slight depression that opened it. Zethrid grinned excitedly as she opened it. Her muscles bunched, she planted her feet firmly on the ground and heaved. A grating noise resounded through the cavernous room, loud enough to startle James.

They held their breath, cocking an ear. No sound came. Zethrid pulled the false wall opened with another mighty heave, the opening just large enough for the two of them to slip through. She allowed him to go in first and, as soon as she stepped inside the small room, the wall slid shut behind them.

There were three computers resting innocently on a makeshift table. Their blue backlight lit the room well enough for them to see. Even to James’ untrained eye, the technology felt ancient, dated.

“That’s Altean tech,” Zethrid said. She marched to the table, leaning forward to look closer at the holoscreen. “Old one too.”

“What is Altean tech doing here?” James asked, puzzled.

“I have no idea.” She pressed her hand down on the nearest touchpad. Nothing happened. “It’s locked against the Galras, unsurprisingly.”

James touched the nearest keyboard. The keys were written in the Mizipran alphabet, not the Altean one. The image on the screen changed. The computer didn’t seem password protected. He had no idea how to navigate around it however. It wasn’t built like any computer he had ever used.

It didn’t matter. They weren’t here to look through the stuff, they were here to steal it.

Keith had showed him how to steal data from an enemy database, so he looked around the hardware to find a slot roughly the shape he needed. Finding one, he inserted the device Keith had given him that would, apparently, download everything that was on the computer. It was Galra-made and James feared for a moment that it wouldn’t work. A tiny light blinked on the device, which he took to mean the downloading was happening. While the data transferred, he took a few pictures of the computers to send them home, hoping that maybe one of the Paladins could explain what Altean tech was doing here.

Zethrid’s hand landed roughly on his shoulder. “People coming,” she muttered.

His heart leapt into his throat. He looked around wildly—there was nowhere to hide here. It was only one featureless room, and hiding under the table would serve no purpose. They’d be seen the second the false wall opened.

They remained in tensed silence, both with their hands fisted, ready to fight their way out. James heard it distinctly now, the soft sound of voices. There was no alarm in the tones, which he hoped meant these people didn’t know there were intruders. Whoever it was had paused a few feet from the false door to discuss, the words too faint to hear the conversation properly. They didn’t appear in a hurry to move on.

Gradually, when it became clear that nobody would walk in on them, they relaxed. They exchanged a wry glance and shrugged. They settled down to wait. James hoped the Miziprans (he guessed they were Miziprans by the softness of their voices) wouldn’t be spending hours here—Zethrid and he needed to be out of the information centre before the opening hour. Looking at the time on his phone told him it had already been two hours since he’d left the hut. He’d been so focused that he hadn’t seen the time flyby.

Zethrid tried uselessly to fiddle with the computers. Popups appeared with walls of text in a language that made no sense to either one of them. Nothing of it looked very sinister according to James. It all appeared to be logbooks, perhaps keeping track of the crafts that landed on the vast tarmac outside. Looking at the foreign letters, he thought that perhaps Captain Shirogane’s name was there, he was simply unable to read it. He really hoped Pidge Holt or one of tech-savvy guys back at the Garrison would be able to make sense of that gibberish.

“So, you and the boss,” Zethrid said.

James realised she was looking down at him with her arms crossed over her chest and a grin on her face. “We shouldn’t talk. Voices may carry.”

She snorted. “Jeez, you’re as bad as the boss said.”

“Whatever does that mean?” James asked, stung.

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Keith said you were a stickler for the rules, boring. Apparently, he wasn’t exaggerating.”

James wondered if he should be offended that Keith had told Zethrid this behind his back. It would be stupid, really; he was indeed a stickler for the rules. Why was everybody mocking him for this? Rules existed for a reason. There would be chaos without them. The Garrison had pulled through the Galran invasion mostly because the higher-ups had been able to keep a grip of iron on the situation. One misstep could have cost them their own planet.

Admittedly, he understood the use of once in a while stepping out of line, he wasn’t dumb. Not all the time, though. People shouldn’t just do whatever they pleased whenever the fancy took them. And anyway, he was a soldier; his life was made up of rules and restrictions. He was fine with that.

He supposed life as a Blade of Marmora might be different, though. With Keith as their leader, surely the rules were lax or loosely applied. They were no longer a military group either. Zethrid had to be used to do her own stuff her own way without anyone remonstrating. Knowing her as little as he did, it didn’t seem like her at all to ask permission or wait for an order. The fact that she was alive yet had to be a small miracle.

She kept looking at him as if she expected a comeback.

“Yes, I follow rules. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

She shrugged. “I remember you from before, you know? I remember you wanting to kill me.”

He stiffened although there was no aggression in her stance. He hesitated, unsure what to answer. “You were holding the Black Paladin hostage. His death would have put at risk the whole universe. I admit this was good incentive to kill you.”

This was a half-truth. He did his best not to remember that episode on that volcanic planet, the panic that had seized him at the sight of this big woman with Keith at her mercy. Hell, she could have snapped his neck with one of those meaty fists. And the others who’d stood by, goggle-eyed, struck dumb. James had come very close to hating Captain Shirogane that day. He was nearly certain that the man had had a clear line of shot, that he’d simply been too… not cowardly but too stunned to do something. James had been so pissed after the mission that he’d thrown his helmet into the nearest wall, shattering it. It had taken hours for his team to manage to calm him down. His anger had flared every time he’d laid eyes on Keith, every time he’d seen the bruises on his neck and around his jaw.

Zethrid snorted, attempting to stifle her bark of laughter. “That’s not it, little alpha! You think I’m blind? You think I don’t see how you look at him?”

James gritted his teeth. She towered over him, looming, and yet he wanted to punch her, strike that grinning, knowing smile off her face. His cheeks burned. Humiliation coursed through him. _Little alpha_. Who did she think she was, that dumb Galra mercenary? Did she think she was better simply because she was a hulking slab of muscles?

“Oh, you’re getting angry, I like that,” Zethrid continued, amused. “Not that much of a ninny, are you?”

“Fuck you. I faced Sendak and lived to tell the tale. You nearly got killed by Keith who’s twice smaller than you, so tell me, who’s the ninny between the two of us?”

Zethrid’s face went still, the stillness of a pond that hid a monstrosity in its depths. James didn’t avert his eyes. He stared her down, gritting his teeth, unwilling to back down. Everything else faded away around him. He forgot about the mission, about where they stood, about the unknown people who barred their exit route. He focused all of his attention on this woman who dared challenge him.

She didn’t back off, not quite. Although she could break him easily, she knew this wouldn’t resolve anything. After a long, tensed minute, she leaned back slightly, the smile returning to her lips.

“Very good. You’re not as lame as I thought.”

He refused to let his guard down quite yet. He frowned, crossing his arms over his chest, standing to his full height unconsciously. “I wasn’t under the impression I had to pass some test.”

Zethrid snorted. “No? Perhaps you’re not lame, but you’re dumb as a rock.” At his indignant gasp, she leaned in, her grin all sharp teeth. “You think I let any random alpha near my boss, hm? Or near my omega? I’m not afraid for any of them, they could break your legs before you knew what was happening. But the boss’ heart’s fragile and wearing armour won’t help him.”

James hadn’t expected that. His eyes widened. Questions ran around his head while his pulse thundered away. The boss’ heart’s fragile, Zethrid had said, Keith’s heart. He swallowed painfully. There was no menace in the woman’s pose now. Looking at her face, James thought he saw… yearning, a yearning for him to understand what she couldn’t put into words. It was unsettling, seeing her this open, this vulnerable. She must love Keith dearly.

“I have no intention of breaking Keith’s heart,” James murmured. “I’ve loved him too long for that.”

The quiet admission fell between them like a pall of precious fabric. James felt only distantly embarrassed to have spilled his feelings to a woman he’d hated. She cared for Keith, he could tell by her protective demeanour. She wanted the best for him, and this was something he could respect.

“Good,” Zethrid announced, straightening. “You can have fun with him, just don’t hurt him.”

“I won’t. I’d never forgive myself.”

After Zethrid’s sharp nod, they remained quiet, each lost in their own thoughts. The air felt cleaner between them. James realised with a jolt that his respect for this woman had increased quite a few notches. She wasn’t the same person who’d tried tossing Keith into a volcano. This Zethrid of the past had been hurting after the loss of her lover, trying to find someone to blame in hope of alleviating her pain. She had blamed Keith and had acted accordingly. James could no longer blame her. He’d probably do the exact same thing if someone were to hurt Keith. He didn’t forgive her, but he did understand her motives a tiny bit more.

“We can go,” she said.

Snapping out of his reverie, James realised that whoever had been standing on the other side of the wall had moved away. They listened for another five minutes to make sure and, after taking back the data stick, finally, slipped out of the cubbyhole. Stepping into the large, open space of the information centre after spending a couple of hours cooped up felt like a breath of fresh air.

They exchanged a knowing grin, sneaked out of the building, and went their separate ways.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James’ mind whirled. Information you seek? A bargain? They were talking as if they knew what was going on, as if they knew the true reason behind James’ and Keith’s presence on their planet. He swallowed thickly, wondering if he’d gotten himself into trouble with these two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! We're past the halfway milestone! I'm so happy everybody is liking the story so far. Thanks to those who have stuck with it since the beginning. To the others who've just started reading, thanks for choosing to read!
> 
> Also, thank you to everybody who leaves comments and kudos; they make me very happy!

“Shit, you did it,” Keith breathed when James handed him the data stick with a mocking little bow. “What took you so long?”

“Complications,” James answered airily.

“What complications?”

James sat on the couch with a long-suffering sigh. “People walked into the centre while we were there. We had to hide until they left. Nobody saw us entering or leaving, don’t worry.”

“Zethrid and you didn’t come to blows?”

Keith’s eyes roamed over his body as if he were looking for bruises or signs that he’d been in a fight.

“Of course not. We’re both professionals, Keith, give us some credit.”

“I know you are. I also know that Zethrid can be hot-tempered sometimes. So, let’s transfer all this back to Earth.” He plugged the stick into his phone, looking eager and excited.

James watched him covertly, loving the flush of excitement that dusted his lovely high cheekbones. The scent Keith broadcasted like radio waves to him was the picture perfect of contentment. The fact that Keith didn’t use blockers made his scent richer, sharper, easier to interpret. They weren’t bonded and yet James had no trouble understanding what was running through his mind.

He could only hope that his own feelings weren’t being announced broadly to Keith in return.

“Where’s Sven?”

“In his bedroom,” Keith answered distractedly, eyes on his phone. “He’s been mean so he’s grounded.”

“Mean? _Sven?_ ”

Keith snorted and threw him an exasperated look. “He’s sweet most of the time, but he’s a three-year-old, James. He’s got a temper. I can’t let him throw tantrums just because he’s cute.”

“He’s temperamental, uh. Wonder which of his dads he gets that from.”

Keith snorted again, sounding amused this time.

They lapsed into a comfortable silence while Keith sent the collected data to their contacts on Earth and James browsed the notifications he’d received on his phone. Ryan had sent him a video of his son, Mason, taking his first steps. James felt stupidly moved to watch the little boy walking, arms extended, towards his mother. Ryan had sent the video through the group chat so of course Nadia had filled it with heart emoji and incoherent screeching sounds. Ina had remarked that the boy’s gait was pretty even for someone so young and had made quite a lengthy analysis of what this meant.

He saw that Ina had sent him a private text, which he opened with curiosity. Ina was reserved and shy, so she rarely initiated first contact, even with her friends. She asked him politely how he was doing and if he was doing okay with Keith and his son. She ended her text by saying that she had a clue who Sven’s father might be and that she’d tell him her suspicions if he were so inclined.

[ _James_ ] _Too late, I already know._

He didn’t say it was Captain Shirogane just in case she hadn’t quite figured it out, which would be surprising.

And of course, he saw that Alex had texted him again. He cursed softly under his breath. He should have blocked the number. Why hadn’t he blocked that damn number? For long minutes he contemplated ignoring the text. Its content couldn’t hurt him if he didn’t read it. His thumb hovered over the messaging app icon, hesitant. He tapped it with a twitch, grimacing at his own stupidity. _I miss you. Please, answer_.

Again those cruel words tearing his heart to ribbons. Where had they been for the past months, when they would have been most welcomed, when he’d been waiting for them with bated breath? He had never been truly, fully in love with Alex. That part of his heart had always belonged to Keith, but the rest had belonged to Alex. He’d thought they could be happy together, make a home, start a family, recover from the destruction the Galra invasion had left in its wake. It hadn’t worked. They’d both tried and they’d failed miserably. Oh, there had been moments of happiness, moments when James completely forgot about the fiery, black-haired boy he’d met in middle school. There had been too much strain put on their relationship however. The cords uniting them had begun fraying and still they added further strain to them until they, unsurprisingly, snapped.

He didn’t answer to the text. He kept staring at the darkened screen of his phone, not wanting to attract undue attention to the distress roiling inside him. Part of himself felt pathetic for being so affected by a breakup. Maybe it was because it had caused such chaos on its wake. In breaking up with Alex, he’d alienated his own parents who’d been haranguing him for years to settle down and have children. They’d been beyond angry at him after they’d learned he couldn’t father children, like it was somehow his fault. It had been worse after he’d told them Alex no longer wanted him. His father’s eyes had been terrible, full of loathing and disgust and shame. His mother had understood without daring to speak up.

It had been the last straw. After that, he’d stopped talking to them.

Would rekindling the flame with Alex mend that broken relationship? Would they forgive him or find it in them to give him another chance? He doubted it; going back to Alex wouldn’t fix what had been lacking in the first place. He still couldn’t father children, Alex still wouldn’t deal well with his nightmares and scars and night terrors.

“You realise that you stink when you’re miserable, don’t you?”

James looked up, startled. He’d completely forgotten where he was. He relaxed the death grip he’d had on his phone. Shit, all the pleasure he’d had at accomplishing his mission had been obliterated by painful memories. He felt wrung out, drained, flat. Back on Earth, this would be the perfect recipe to send him on a drinking binge. There was no alcohol on Mizipra and neither of them had thought to bring any.

“Uh, sorry,” he mumbled. “It’s a side-effect of the scenting. I told you that you’d be more aware of me.”

“I have eyes to see too, you know? I can tell when a guy’s miserable. You’ve been sitting there with your shoulders hunched and clutching your phone for an hour. Did something happen? Are your friends okay?”

James regarded Keith for a moment. His unhappiness made him suspicious. Was Keith humouring him? Was he asking just so James would snap out of it? But no, Keith’s eyes were clear, his posture open. Was that the result of the scenting or was he simply a great guy like that?

He thought of lying, thought of twisting the truth or omitting part of it. Instead, he blurted out: “My ex’s been texting me after months of silence. I don’t know what to do.”

“Ah. The ex who threw you under the bus because you can’t have kids?”

James laughed miserably. “Yeah. It’s not like I have tons of them, Kogane.”

“Look, I’m not Dr. Love or anything, but that’s a pretty easy problem to solve. Tell him to go to hell.”

“What if I don’t want him to go to hell?”

Keith’s eyes narrowed. “Well, if you’re dumb and you want him back, just tell him. What are you moping for then?”

James bristled. “I’m not dumb! You simply have no idea what I’m talking about! You can’t just throw to the trash a relationship like that! We wanted to start a family together! We had our life planned out!”

“And? The guy obviously only wanted your kids. If he loved you, he’d have stayed with you regardless. How can you not see that?”

“It’s not as easy as that, Keith! Without Alex, I have no family!”

“What? What are you talking about? You have your parents and your siblings, don’t you?”

“My brother and sister died when the city was attacked. My parents survived and, do you know who they blame for their death? _Me_. Me, because I’m an elite pilot at the Garrison and I wasn’t allowed to try saving them. Do you know how it felt to sit inside the Garrison, protected by the particle barrier, knowing your family’s being torn to pieces? My parents were lucky, they managed to hide, but not my brother and sister. We haven’t even found their bodies yet. And my parents asked why I didn’t say fuck you to Commander Iverson and try saving them. You know why I didn’t? Because I knew it was useless. I knew that if I died, they’d be one pilot fewer to face the Galras and one jet fewer. So they died. And my parents blamed me. It seriously messed me up. And then I met Alex. He was a nurse and I’d just lost my foot and he took care of me. We were good friends before we started dating. He put me back together as best he could. He talked to my parents. It was fine for a while. We did our best to put the past behind us. And then it got serious between us and we were thinking about getting married a-and well, you know what happened.”

He hadn’t meant to say all that. Horror dawned slowly on him. He looked up to realise with mounting dismay that his vision swam, that he could hardly see Keith through a veil of tears. He rubbed at his eyes angrily, ashamed to have spilled all of his crap at Keith’s feet unprompted.

“I’m so sorry,” Keith breathed, voice hollow. “James, I’m sorry. If we’d arrived sooner, if Voltron had been there, your family would still be whole. That time with Hunk, you… shit, James, you broke the rules for Hunk and you didn’t break them for yourself? What’s wrong with you?!”

James let out a watery laugh. “We needed Hunk’s head in the game. We needed him to form Voltron and defend us. Otherwise, all those people would have died for nothing.”

“You’re so damn practical. How can you do that, compartmentalize that way?”

“It comes with being a leader, Keith. You know that.”

James regretted his outburst. Keith looked shaken. He was pale and his eyes were huge. He looked distressed on James’ behalf, like he’d been unforgivingly gauche. He had, a bit, but James wouldn’t hold it against him. He hadn’t known, couldn’t have known. Millions of lives had been lost in those terrible months, after all. Keith couldn’t be made to know of them all.

“Nevertheless,” Keith continued hesitantly, “I still think you shouldn’t go back to that guy. Clearly he doesn’t deserve you if he let you go in the first place. You’ll find someone else.”

“It’s complicated,” James concluded tiredly.

“Look, I’m not him, but maybe we can at least make our time here fun?”

Before he had time to ask what this meant, Keith was straddling him. Knees firmly planted on the couch on either side of James’ legs, he loomed over him, eyes dark, black hair fanning his face that was suddenly inches from his. James froze, leaning back as far as the backrest would allow, pulling his hands away in fear of touching Keith by accident. Keith’ arms bracketed his shoulders, making it impossible to move. Almost gently, he plucked James’ phone from his numb fingers, throwing it to the other end of the couch.

“What’s that, Kogane?”

Keith shrugged good-naturedly. There was a tiny smile playing at the corner of his lips. “Harmless fun?”

“Are you taking pity on me?”

“Seriously, James, am I the type of guy to take pity on anyone?”

James closed his eyes, breathing through his nose to remain calm. “You are, actually. You’re not nearly as heartless as you pretend to be.”

“Is that why you’re attracted to me?”

No, no, no! He couldn’t know about that! James’ brain scrambled for an explanation, for something to say, but Keith’s presence near him made it difficult to think. Had he picked something in their mingled smells? Had he sensed James’ feelings for him?

“That, and that pretty face of yours. And your gorgeous ass.”

Keith laughed. “You’ve been ogling my ass, Griffin?”

“Ever since you came back to Earth in that damn Paladin armour of yours. Do you have any idea how sinful you looked with all that tight fabric?”

“Hm, yeah, I think I do. I’ve heard about it a few times.”

“And that damn Blade of Marmora uniform.” James groaned. “I really shouldn’t be saying all that. Damn you for making me spill all my dirty secrets…!”

Keith grinned. He angled James’ face upward, fingers gentle on his jaw. Their eyes met and locked, breaths mingling. “Don’t apologize. I much prefer when you’re being honest. That uptight attitude of yours was never attractive, James.”

The smell of Keith’s arousal was like fine wine. It got to James’ head immediately, making his thoughts unspool. He tasted it at the back of his throat, thick enough to nearly be tangible.

“So now that I’m complimenting you, you find me attractive?”

“No. Now that you’re being bold, I like you better.” Keith leaned forward, their lips a breath apart. “I even find that hot.”

If he leaned in the tiniest bit, they’d be kissing. James remembered the taste of those sweet lips, remembered Keith’s warmth and how perfectly his body had felt in his arms. Why was he resisting? Why was he holding back? Keith clearly knew what he wanted. His eyes were dark with lust, but they were clear. He was acting this way willingly. What it all meant, James had no idea. Harmless fun, Keith had said, simply two horny adults having consensual fun. He tried thinking of the mission and it hardly dampened the fire raging in his chest.

“What about Sven?” he blurted out, looking towards the boy’s closed bedroom door.

“He’s grounded for an hour. There’s about fifteen minutes left. He knows not to come out until the time is over.”

Fifteen minutes. Was Keith saying they had fifteen minutes to do whatever they wanted? It seemed hardly proper. James returned his attention to him, breath catching in his throat. Keith’s smell swaddled him completely, leaving hardly any room for coherent thoughts. This was better than any alcohol he’d have downed back on Earth. Keith’s nearness obliterated everything else.

He brought Keith down in a searing kiss. Their teeth clacked together and Keith laughed breathlessly, a sound that James eagerly drank. He dug his fingers into Keith’s soft black hair, tugging him closer. Their tongues met and their teeth nipped at their swollen lips. James ran one of his hands down the curve of Keith’s back then up again under his shirt, feeling the hot skin. He marvelled that he was allowed to do that, to let his hands roam freely over the body he’d longed for.

Keith pulled back to take a few panting breaths. His cheeks were red, his lips swollen and moist, his hair was a mess of tangles slipping out of its braid. They never broke eye contact. Emboldened by Keith’s open desire, James grabbed his ass, feeling the plump flesh through his tight pants. Keith laughed breathlessly.

“You’re not as lanky as you were,” he said with a grin, touching James’ biceps and chest with an appreciative purr. “Didn’t know you had it in you to be this bloody handsome.”

“Didn’t know the scrawny, dirty little kid I met in middle school could turn that damn gorgeous.”

Keith was leaning in for another kiss when they heard the bedroom door creak open. James, flushing, expected Keith to jump off him quick as lighting. Instead, he simply looked up.

“Has it been an hour, Sven?” he asked.

“Yes, dada.” Sven stood there, watching them with huge, uncertain eyes. “Uh.”

Keith climbed off his lap easily, going to crouch in front of his son.

James suddenly felt cold, his arms empty without anybody to hold. He sat up properly, clearing his throat and tugging his pants so his erection didn’t show quite so much. He was mortified to have been seen by Sven. They should have been more careful, it had been stupid.

Sven didn’t look the worst for wear, thankfully. He was apologizing to Keith for throwing a tantrum, managing to look both sad and unrepentant at the same time. Looking at him, James wondered how he had been blind enough not to realise this was Captain Shirogane’s son. They had the exact same kicked puppy look he’d often seen the captain give Lieutenant Miller. Their eyes were of the same shape, except that Sven’s were black rather than dark grey. His eyebrows were all Keith’s however, as thick and as expressive.

Sven was clearly the perfect blend between his two fathers.

A wave of jealousy hit him so hard it knocked the breath out of his lungs. It submerged him fast enough that he had no time to protect himself against it. He imagined it all oh so easily, Keith and the captain talking late one night. Alcohol facilitating things, they sat closer, closer, until they were touching, until their eyes met, until they were leaning towards the other. Their lips met and then their hands were on each other’s body, tugging at clothes. It would have been quick, a short, fast fuck fueled by sadness and loneliness and unassuaged horniness, perhaps even a smidge of unspoken feelings. And then it was over. They went their separate ways, Captain Shirogane probably horrified at his lack of self-control. It forced him to pull from Keith, to force him away, aside, until Keith left for good. Had he ever thought back on that tryst, on what could have arisen from it?

When they found the captain, would Keith tell him about Sven’s true lineage or would he keep it to himself? Captain Shirogane was dutiful, what if he decided he wanted to be part of the boy’s life? What would then happen of James and Lieutenant Miller, the two saps who pined after these great men?

-

That night, James learned that Keith blamed himself for what had happened on Earth. He woke up with a start to hear Keith mumbling under his breath about it, sitting up on the bed and rocking softly. His whole body shook and his eyes were huge as he hugged his knees against his chest. James comforted him as best he could, not quite touching him since he knew being touched during a waking nightmare could be jarring. Eventually, Keith calmed down, slumping against him in a boneless, exhausted heap. They didn’t talk for the longest time, each fighting their own remembered demons. He hated how Keith kept apologizing, like he was to blame for the Galran invasion. The Paladins had done their best even if they had arrived too late to push back the initial attack. James used to blame them, a little, back when his rage had been incandescent enough to burn even his logical thinking. Nowadays, after five years of reflection, the blame had disappeared. Although he wished things had been different, he’d come to accept that hating and being angry wouldn’t change anything.

After a while, Keith excused himself. He extracted himself from the embrace and James heard him pad softly to his son’s bedroom. No doubt he felt comforted by Sven’s presence, knowing that at least one good thing had come from those terrible years of intergalactic warfare.

There wasn’t much sleep after that for James. He lied on his back, staring at the ceiling, letting his thoughts unspool. The eerie red light that bathed the room annoyed him. He pulled the blankets up over his head, longing for darkness that would help him rest.

In the morning, he got up, slightly groggy and out of it. Keith was still asleep in Sven’s bed, but Sven was up, puttering about in the living room.

“Hey, poppet, you up already?” James asked, crouching in front of the boy. “Did you sleep well?”

Sven nodded, too busy doodling on Keith’s tablet with a stylus to give James his full attention.

“That’s a nice picture. What is it?”

“Tata Ezor.”

Narrowing his eyes, James supposed there might be actually be some resemblance to Ezor, in the shape of the head and the shade used for the skin. If Ezor had four eyes and a long nose, that was.

“You like drawing?”

“Yes, like dada.”

“Dada draws?”

Sven opened a folder on the tablet, selected some file, and opened it before handing the tablet to James. He immediately recognized the person depicted on the picture; Princess Allura. The likeness was remarkable even though it was a mere black-and-white sketch. Keith had captured her cheeky smile and the light of intelligence in her eye. It clearly had been drawn from memory however, some lines looking paler, hesitant around the nose and jawline, like Keith couldn’t quite remember the exact bone structure of her face. Despite this, there was no mistaking who this was.

There were other likenesses, some of people he didn’t know, others of folk he’d met. He recognized Keith’s mother Krolia, the Paladins, Matt Holt, crew from the Atlas from the time they’d fought the witch Honerva, members of the Blade of Marmora. There used to be a lot of drawings of Captain Shirogane, James realised. There were fewer now, only a few half-hearted doodles.

Who would have thought Keith had an artistic soul?

James gave the tablet back to Sven; it suddenly seemed way too personal to be looking through sketches of Keith’s life. There had been so many pictures of Captain Shirogane. All of them had been rendered lovingly, attention paid to every detail like Keith had actually sat down and taken the time to sketch the unsuspecting captain. His love shone through every strokes, every line.

Being jealous sucked.

When Keith got up, there were circles beneath his eyes, but he looked alert and in a relative good mood nonetheless.

“I’m going to go for a jog, if that’s all right with you,” James told him.

Keith shrugged, pouring himself some coffee. “Sure, go ahead. Pick some food on the way back if you’d like.”

Sweating and getting rid of some pent-up frustrations would be good. James changed into his gym clothes and left the hut.

He had to have been going at it for no more than half an hour when his name was called. He slowed down, surprised, looking around himself. He’d followed the road encircling the compound, finding it mostly empty. He’d been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t noticed the two Miziprans coming in his direction. He immediately recognized Assmiya and Assilsa hurrying towards him. There was an air of urgency to them that he’d never seen before. It made him nervous.

“Good morning, James,” Assmiya murmured. “You remember my ma—I mean, my friend, Assilsa?”

Right, they were no longer mated. It had broken Assmiya’s heart, so much that they’d cried on their own on the beach. James nodded to show he remembered. Although he didn’t know the specific rules, he was pretty sure that ex-mates weren’t supposed to be walking around together.

As if to prove him correct, Assmiya brushed his arm very lightly, angling him towards a small copse of trees away from the road. Their skin—or whatever it was—was soft like silk and cool. It sent a shiver down his spine.

Once again, Assmiya took the lead. “I apologize for doing this in secret. I would simply prefer our conversation to remain private. Last time we spoke, you mentioned being interested in fellow humans, to put your mate at ease.” The colour in Assmiya’s four eyes shifted minutely, indicating some emotion. “I can smell your mate on you. Things are going better between you, I trust?” At James’ nod, they said: “I’m happy. There were indeed humans present on Mizipra a few weeks ago…”

The Mizipran trailed off. The colour of their skin changed, became more muted. James caught tension and fear in their smell. His spine stiffened.

“We are willing to bargain,” Assilsa cut in. Their voice was low and melodious too, deeper than Assmiya’s. “We believe we have information you seek.”

James’ mind whirled. Information you seek? A bargain? They were talking as if they knew what was going on, as if they knew the true reason behind James’ and Keith’s presence on their planet. He swallowed thickly, wondering if he’d gotten himself into trouble with these two.

“I’m listening,” he said calmly.

“In exchange for this information, we request we be taken to Earth.”

The tone brooked no argument. Assilsa had spoken decisively, firmly. Their demeanour showed a determination he hadn’t encountered yet amongst the Miziprans.

“Mizipra is part of the Voltron Coalition,” James reminded them carefully, “you can visit Earth whenever you like. You don’t need permission.”

“Indeed we do,” Assilsa said. “We need permission from our overlords to travel. Only couples with children are allowed off the planet.”

James looked at them, understanding dawning. Although they had no easily-readable facial features, he could see their desperation, their need for him to understand. They wanted to run away to be together. A tale as old as time itself, the forbidden couple had to run away from their oppressors to be together.

It would be easy to say yes, but he couldn’t accept readily. Mizipra was part of the Voltron Coalition, it meant the planet lived by the Coalition’s rules. It also meant that the Coalition had to respect its members’ wishes and its laws. Helping Assmiya and Assilsa would go against their planet’s wishes.

On the other hand, it was possible that Captain Takashi Shirogane, one of the figureheads of the Coalition, was held against his will on this planet. This could be interpreted as an act of war far graver than helping two Miziprans running away.

James nodded grimly. “We will help to the best of our abilities.”

A tiny bit of tension oozed from the two Miziprans. They glanced at each other, exchanging a gaze so full of love James was embarrassed to be witnessed to it. He looked away, wondering if he’d reached the right decision. Maybe it would be better to wait to have this discussion so he could fetch Keith. He knew however that Assmiya and Assilsa wouldn’t want to risk waiting. James would have to decide and Keith would have to live with the consequences.

“There were indeed humans on Mizipra a few weeks ago,” Assilsa said, voice serious. “I tended to them personally. Every one of us receives one directive: make sure those under our care visit the fair. What happens afterwards, I do not know. All I know for certain is that many of our visitors have… disappeared after visiting that fair. The same happened to those humans.”

James’ body thrummed with excitement. A fair. Yes, he’d read about that in both the report written by Captain Shirogane and in the informative pamphlet. He recalled the captain saying he wished to visit a fair. After that, it had been radio silence. Could this be it? Did something happen during that event that made people… disappear? Whether the captain had actually disappeared there was only partly relevant; Assilsa had just admitted that folk vanished from there. James had the moral duty to look into this nonetheless.

He scrambled for his phone. He pulled out the first picture of Captain Shirogane he found and showed it to the two Miziprans.

“Do you know this man?”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith returned his attention to him, a half-smile playing on his lips. “Are you asking me out on a date, James?”
> 
> If there ever were a time when James wished life could be paused, this was it. He froze in the act of taking a sip of water. His brain stuttered, trying to go in half a million different directions. This wasn’t what he’d expected Keith to say. What should he answer? Should he banter along? Should be honest?
> 
> “Would you like that?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! Welcome to the daily update! Thank you so much for reading and commenting! So much happens in this chapter! Keith and James get closer and there's the promise of a date!
> 
> **Please, be aware that there is smut in this chapter and that afab language is used. I'd suggest you skip that part if this makes you uncomfortable. Thank you.**

Assilsa tensed. “Yes, I know this person. He was here, he’s the one I was tasked to look over.”

James’ grip tightened on his phone. Holy shit, their first lead. He tried to hide his excitement, but there was no slowing the mad tempo of his heartbeat.

“Do you know who he is?” At the shake of their heads, James said: “He’s Captain Takashi Shirogane of the Voltron Coalition.”

He watched while the information sank in. As one, both their faces drained of colour to look ashen. Their eyes dimmed, their body language morphing. They knew who he was and James was pretty certain that Assilsa hadn’t known the person he’d looked over during his stay was the captain. He read horror in the lines of their body.

“You’re here to retrieve him,” Assmiya murmured. “I thought I recognized your mate. Is he per chance the Black Paladin?”

James sighed. “Yes, I hadn’t expected anyone to recognize him out of his armour and without his helmet. But you’re right, we’re here for Captain Shirogane and his mate, a man named Curtis Miller.”

“As we told you, we don’t know where they are, only that they were here and, like many before them, they disappeared after attending the fair.”

Assilsa sounded guarded now, like they were afraid James would lash out at them for the disappearance of his comrades.

“That’s okay,” James assured soothingly. “The fact that you confirmed the captain was here means a lot. We will visit that fair and eventually find him. No blame will be laid at your feet, I promise.”

“Are you also one of the Paladins?” Assmiya asked in a low, awed voice. “The Red Paladin, perhaps?”

James was too relieved and happy to have found a lead on the captain to wrinkle his nose in disgust at being mistaken for Álvarez. He shook his head. “I’m afraid not. I’m not a Paladin. I was part of the Atlas crew. I worked under Captain Shirogane, in fact.”

Assmiya’s awe didn’t disappear as he had feared. “Very impressive. Do you think you will be able to find your friends?”

“Yes. We will find them, and we will take them back to Earth. And the two of you will be welcomed to join us. Captain Shirogane will speak on your behalf if your leaders should object. The human population has been decimated, surely we’ll find some room somewhere for two nice persons like yourselves.” New colours flooded their faces and luster returned to their eyes. “Thank you very much for this,” he said honestly. “It’s priceless information.”

The Miziprans left shortly after, leaving him alone with his roiling thoughts. Holy crap, finally, finally! After five days on this planet, they had a breakthrough! There were many things left unanswered, but James felt energized by this new information. He remained there for a moment, mulling this over, trying without much success not to get too excited. It wasn’t that much, but it was something, it was more than they had come up with before. They had planned to visit that fair since the captain had mentioned it; would have they been vigilant enough to spot something fishy however? With Assilsa’s warning, at least they’d know to keep an eye out for danger or anything out of the ordinary.

The fair took place two days hence. It left them more than enough time to get ready.

He resumed his jog, resisting the temptation to downright run to tell Keith the news. The hut was in sight when, of course, his prosthetic decided right now would be the time to give him hell. He felt it, the telltale sharp pain in his missing right foot that indicated a malfunction. He nearly pitched forward as, suddenly, he could no longer feel his toes. He stood there for a moment, panting, glaring at his running shoe. This wasn’t new. It was a known problem that the Galran doctor who’d made the prosthetic couldn’t quite fix no matter how often he tried. Apparently, it was James’ fault for being too hard on it.

He’d bet anything that nobody ever blamed Shirogane when his own prosthetic failed.

Limping, grumbling under his breath, he made his way towards the hut. There wasn’t much pain; it only felt like walking on a foot that had fallen asleep. He actually had to look down to be sure his foot was properly placed on the ground before putting any weight on it. A seemingly mindless exercise to anyone else, walking could be challenging when even the tiniest of thing went wrong.

“What happened to you?” Keith asked when he saw him limp in. “Were you attacked? What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine,” James assured with a sigh. He sat heavily on the couch. “My prosthetic’s being stupid.”

“What do you mean?”

James removed his shoe and showed him. The toes hung limply at an unnatural angle. He could still move his ankle, but the rest of the foot was completely numb.

“It’s happened before, it’s nothing too bad. The wires inside get tangled up and it messes with the flow of energy. Nadia usually fixes it for me.”

“Can you fix it yourself?”

“No. There’s a small hole on the instep. I can’t see it.”

Keith sat beside him, grabbed his prosthetic, and rested it on his lap to peer under the foot. James allowed it, only mildly surprised by this turn of event. He could feel the warmth of Keith’s hand resting a few inches over his ankle through the white alloy. It wasn’t quite the same as skin on skin contact, but it was enough.

“I’ve got good news, you know?” James said.

Keith fiddled with the prosthetic, eyebrows lowered in a frown. “Hm?”

“I talked to Assmiya and Assilsa. They’ve given me a good lead on what might have happened to Captain Shirogane.”

Keith looked up so fast James feared he might give himself whiplash. “What?!”

“Apparently, every Mizipran who works on this compound receives the instruction that they have to take their charge to this fair. Assilsa confirmed that they took the captain and the lieutenant there. They don’t know what happens next, only that a few guests have been disappearing after visiting this place. We know from Captain Shirogane’s journal that he visited that fair, and the entries stop after that.”

“I see… and isn’t that fair a couple of days from now?”

James nodded. “Yes. It’s not all though. In exchange for that information, I promised Assilsa and Assmiya that we would take them to Earth. They have to run away from Mizipra if they want to stay together.”

Keith pursed his lips. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. This won’t please their leaders and the Coalition will be pissed that we mingled in the internal affairs of a foreign planet.”

“Oh? Since when do you care about what the Coalition thinks? Seriously, the way I see it, they’ll be too grateful that we brought Shirogane back to complain. Shirogane will smooth any ruffled feathers easily.” James shrugged. “And you’re the leader of the Blade of Marmora; surely your voice carries some weight too.”

“Yeah, I suppose so. Anyway, that’s excellent news.” Keith grinned. “Maybe Iverson was right when he said you had your uses. You got the locals to trust you immediately.”

Oh, that wicked, devilish grin did something to James’ insides that wasn’t unpleasant at all. He cleared his throat, trying to ignore the fact that his foot still rested on the other man’s lap.

“It wasn’t difficult. I simply had to be nice. You could’ve done it too.”

Keith shrugged and went back to fiddling with the prosthetic. James regretted the loss of feeling in his foot; he’d have loved to feel Keith’s dainty fingers. He let the other work, trusting him not to mess things up even worse. Nadia had assured him this was a problem anyone could fix and he trusted her judgement.

“How did this happen?” Keith asked softly.

The question was spoken gently, without insistence to let James know he could choose not to answer. James had learned after the war that not everybody liked talking about their wounds, their scars, their disfigurement. Some preferred to pretend their body was still whole while others had no trouble expanding on it. James had been reluctant at first, mostly because he didn’t want to be looked at with pity. With the technology at their disposal, even before the Galras brought their knowledge of advanced prosthetic building and melding, losing a limb had never equaled a big handicap. This meant that James had been able to return to the fighting early without much loss of movement or agility. He could run for as long or as fast as he had before. He no longer had trouble climbing stairs and, barring the times the prosthetic needed fixing like right now or some adjustment, he usually forgot he’d lost a foot.

“Crashed my jet,” James said. “The fuselage crushed my foot. I was lucky not to bleed to death. They tried saving the foot afterward, but it was too far gone.”

“I’m sorry,” Keith said honestly. “You’re very brave.”

James shrugged. “It comes with fighting a war, Kogane, you know that. I’m better off than many people. At least I’m alive.” Keith did something that made his foot twitch. “Ow, careful there!”

“Oops, sorry! Jeez, was the guy who made this drunk? I’ll talk to Rukal, she’s the head-medic of the Blade. She’ll be able to fix that properly once and for all.” He sighed. “And yes, you’re alive, that’s true.” He paused. “Tell me about your brother and sister. I think I remember your sister from middle school.”

The request surprised James. He considered Keith a moment. With his long hair falling over his face, it was impossible to see his expression. His hands were infinitely gentle however, as had been his voice. James forced himself to relax. Thinking about his dead siblings always caused a bittersweet pain. He liked remembering him even if it always brought a stab of loss to his heart.

“Yeah, Marie was two years younger than me. She wanted to be a doctor. She’d just graduated from high school with honours when the invasion happened. Henri was five years younger. He was a shy kid, always hiding in his room and writing poems and stuff like that. I swear the things he came up with could make a rock cry. I was closer to him than to Marie. Marie was hard-headed and difficult sometimes. We were always clashing over the silliest thing. Once, when we were kids, at my aunt’s beach house, we argued over who should teach Henri to swim. We spent hours going at it, just to realise that Henri had learned on his own while our back was turned. Then we argued whose fault it was. And then my parents grounded us because we were too busy arguing to look after our little brother.”

Keith listened quietly, respectfully, in a way that James hadn’t thought possible. He still had trouble reconciling this new, kind man to the feral boy he’d known in his youth. War and responsibilities did change people, sometimes for the best, apparently.

“There,” Keith said after a while. “Is that better?”

James looked down at his prosthetic. Slowly, he forced himself to wiggle his toes. They responded to the command easily, without a hitch.

“That’s perfect. Thanks.”

He didn’t move, letting his foot remain on Keith’s thigh. Keith made no move to push it away. James could feel his body heat seeping through the fabric of his pants. It wasn’t awkward, the silence, it was comfortable. It felt good to simply sit here for a moment, let his mind settle back after being disturbed by memories.

“Have you heard from the Garrison yet?” James asked. “About the data you sent them?”

“No, not yet. Pidge confirmed that she received it. She’s probably sifting through it and trying to make sense of it. She’ll send me news as soon as she gets it.”

“Good.” He remembered something and exclaimed: “Shit! I was so excited to come back after talking to Assmiya that I forgot to fetch food! Want me to get some? I need to make sure you fix my foot right anyway.”

“Sure.”

His smell had shifted somewhat. James had been lost enough in his own thoughts that he hadn’t noticed it. Taking a subtle whiff, it took him a few seconds to identify what had changed. His usual smell of wood smoke had a spicier note to it, the exact same thang he’d had when they’d scented each other and when they’d kissed afterward.

Blood rushed south fast enough to leave him reeling. Holy shit Keith was _horny_. The smell seemed to fill the living room like a mist, assaulting James. He got to his feet, flustered. His body reacted, screaming at him to take care of his needy omega. Keith didn’t _look_ needy, though there was a shiny cast to his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

Keith seemed to realise what was happening because he blushed, turning his face away. “J-just go, okay?! Give me a moment alone!”

A moment alone. A moment alone to get rid of that horniness. James’ treacherous mind sent him images of the toy he’d found amongst Keith’s belongings. Shit, was he planning to use that? He could, if he was quick enough. Sven was watching some cartoons from his bedroom; he’d never notice his father spending five minutes locked in the bathroom.

James opened his mouth before closing it with a snap. Shit, he wanted to offer his help. The urge to say the words nearly burned his tongue. Judging from past experiences, he was pretty sure that Keith wouldn’t refuse. For half a second, he entrained the idea, entertained the thought of relieving Keith of that pent up pressure. Whatever Keith wanted, whatever he needed, he’d do it gladly without complaint. Keith would order him about, wouldn’t let him do as he pleased. He’d know what he’d want and how he wanted it.

Instead of submitting to his own base needs, James spun on his heels and left the hut. His face burned and the cool air did very little to actually calm him. He stood there, rubbing his hands over his eyes. Shit, why was he such a coward? His inner alpha screeched at him that he was being stupid, that there was still time to go back inside. It wasn’t as if Keith was in heat and couldn’t refuse him.

He walked away, doing his best to silence his thoughts. His hands still shook a bit when he piled a tray high with food at random. The chatter of other people around him went over his head. If anyone saw his distress, they didn’t make mention of it. He’d been hungry before this mess began, but now, his stomach was tied into too tight knots for him to feel hunger.

He took his time to go back home, dragging his feet and hoping Keith would feel… better once he reached the hut. Instead of thinking about this, he turned his thoughts towards the fact that they’d finally had a breakthrough. It lifted his spirits a little; at last they had a clue, a trace to follow. What they’d find at that fair James couldn’t begin to imagine. What could possibly make people disappear? He’d been to fairs in his youth and he wasn’t sure how someone could simply vanish, especially not someone like Captain Shirogane. Children went missing, adults lost their friends in the crowd, but downright missing for weeks was something James had never heard happening.

Of course, this wasn’t Earth. He supposed it could be easy to snatch an unsuspecting person from crowded grounds full of convenient hidey-holes, except that he still didn’t see how someone like the captain could be kidnapped. Lieutenant Miller and Captain Shirogane were both soldiers, they simply couldn’t be taken without a fight. Unless they’d been knocked senseless or drugged? Was it something in the food or in the drinks, perhaps?

James made a note to tell Keith not to eat anything from the fairgrounds.

He was once again in a good frame of mind when he reached the hut. Mentally, he slammed the door on what had just happened to focus on the mission. The mission was everything; it had to be his first and sole priority.

Keith had just put Sven to bed for his afternoon nap when James deposited the tray of food on the table in the living room.

“I think it’d be safe not to eat anything from the fairgrounds,” James said, not giving Keith time to go back on what had just happened.

Keith sat on the couch and quirked an eyebrow at him. “Why not? What if they have cotton candy?”

James rolled his eyes. “Think, Kogane. How would you kidnap two men like Shirogane and Lieutenant Miller? You can’t simply snatch them off the street.”

Keith munched on what looked like a purple carrot. “Hm. You think they might have been poisoned?”

“Poisoned or drugged. That’s the likeliest explanation. You’ve seen the Miziprans; they’re weak-bodied. I really, really doubt anyone of them could take Shirogane down.”

“They _look_ weak, but appearances can be deceiving. Nonetheless, I understand what you mean. No eating the food at the fair, not even the cotton candy.”

“What’s with you and cotton candy?”

Keith nibbled on another carrot, eyes distant. “I went to a fair in town with my father when I was a kid. What I remember most is the pink cotton candy. It’s the exact same shade as the colour of the ocean here. I’ve been craving it ever since I saw it.”

James scoffed good-naturedly. “Come to Earth once this is over. That fair still exists. I’ll take you and Sven and buy you cotton candy.”

Keith returned his attention to him, a half-smile playing on his lips. “Are you asking me out on a date, James?”

If there ever were a time when James wished life could be paused, this was it. He froze in the act of taking a sip of water. His brain stuttered, trying to go in half a million different directions. This wasn’t what he’d expected Keith to say. What should he answer? Should he banter along? Should be honest?

“Would you like that?”

Keith actually considered the question. “I’ve never been on a date before.”

This wasn’t an answer. James’ heart leapt and he took the plunge. “Let me be the first to take you out, then. You’ll not regret it.” He grinned. “I promise to have you home by nine.”

Had he imagined it or was there a dusting of colour on Keith’s cheeks? Keith looked down, suddenly taking a long time to choose what next to eat from the platter of food.

“All right. I’ll hold you to it, Griffin. Once this is over and we’ve rescued Shiro, you’ll take me on a date.”

“Seriously?”

Keith chuckled. “You’re breaking character already! Yes, _seriously_. Jeez, there’s no need to look like a fish out of water. Forget it if it’s too much pressure.”

“It’s not too much pressure! I just… it’s just… you’re doing everything backwards! I should have taken you out on a date before scenting you.”

Keith rolled his eyes. “Ugh, it doesn’t matter.” He leaned back, arms crossed over his chest and gaze steady. “Speaking of scenting. We should do it more often.”

“Why? I don’t think it’s necessary. It won’t—” James stopped. Swallowed. “You don’t want to do it out of necessity. You want to do it for fun.”

“I’d rather we have sex, but it’s—there you’re doing it, going all red in the face. I can practically see your brain boiling in your head, James.”

“K-Keith, holy shit, you can’t say stuff like that.”

“Why not?” Keith looked a tad embarrassed this time. He glanced away. “I’m not good at this kind of thing, okay? I don’t know the… protocol. I just thought we could have a bit of fun, no strings attached. Since you reeked of some omega the day we left, I thought you were the kind of guy who didn’t mind just screwing around. Obviously, I forgot who I was talking to—no way good boy James Griffin would want a friend with benefits.”

“Are you… are you saying you… are you saying you want me to…?” He swallowed past the lump in his throat. “You want us to be friends with benefits?”

“Finally, just took you three times before you got it out. James, you’re bloody blind. That’s what I’ve been hinting at for the past _week_. Why are you looking so shocked? We’re stuck here pretending to be a couple. The Miziprans all look at us suspiciously because we don’t act like a couple and because, let’s admit it, they probably sniff our bedsheets. We’re the two worst actors in the history of actors. We need to convince them we’re together or we’ll get expulsed before we find Shiro. And we’re both horny; don’t think I haven’t noticed it. You think I’m deaf, blind, and dumb?”

James forced his mouth to work. “You’re saying… you want us to fuck?”

Keith threw his hands up. “Halleluiah! He got it!” He softened. “Sorry, but you know me, you know I don’t mince my words.” He shrugged, his cheeks colouring. “Crap, I didn’t mean to traumatise you. You’re not saying anything. I think I broke you.”

James’ thoughts had screeched to a halt. The only thing he could make sense of was that Keith had just said he wanted them to fuck. Have sex together. That he’d been thinking about it for a while.

He sat back. It had to be too much because his mind just… stopped. He looked at Keith just sitting there. Despite the ugly sweater, he looked beautiful with his hair pulled back in a ponytail and his big doe eyes. He’d always been so unfairly gorgeous, but it all seemed amplified with what he’d just said.

“Come here,” James said, patting his knee.

He saw it immediately, the dark lust shadowing Keith’s eyes. The air shifted in the living room, became hotter, saturated with their lust-filled smells. Keith tilted his chin up a fraction, unconsciously baring his neck. James’ pulse quickened at this tiny gesture of submission. Oh, Keith wasn’t going down without a fight, he simply wasn’t willing to waste energy on that particular fight.

“Take off your pants and your hoodie.”

“Bossy,” Keith answered, obeying nonetheless.

James’ eyes eagerly drank in the display Keith set in front of him. He pulled his hoodie over his head, throwing it to the side. He then toed off his running shoes, tucked his thumbs under the waistband of his sweatpants, and dragged them down his long legs. He wasn’t being particularly sexy or slow about it. He wasn’t giving a show. It was simply that everything concerning Keith was like liquid lust. It coursed through James’ burning veins, setting him afire. He could tell from the amused glint in Keith’s eyes that he was indulging him, allowing him to order him around a bit. James was pretty sure that, under normal circumstances, Keith would have strangled him with his sweatpants after removing them rather than stay there in his half-naked glory. He was down to only a shirt and a pair of black panties.

From the recess of his foggy mind, James remembered they had to hurry up; Sven was napping in the bedroom. He’d be up in about half an hour, and there was nothing James wanted less than being caught by a child with his pants around his ankles.

He told himself to remain calm. Keith had made it clear that he wished for this arrangement to be longstanding. This wasn’t a one-time deal. They’d have more time later to do more. Shit, James’ imagination ran wild with everything he wanted to do to Keith, _with_ Keith.

Keith’s scent clogged his nostrils, thick with arousal and yearning. There was a challenge in his eyes, James saw, in the way he held himself with his chin tilted up. He wanted James to make a fool of himself by rushing this, wanted to use this to mock him later for his prudishness, to tell him he’d acted like any other horny alpha. Keith was testing him.

And James wasn’t a coward. He didn’t run from challenges. If this was a competition, he’d show he could triumph.

“Sit on my lap,” he said, glad his voice didn’t shake. “Your back to my chest.”

Keith quirked an eyebrow, but didn’t talk back. He lowered himself on James’ lap, nestling his butt against his crotch. He couldn’t fail to notice how hard James was, all of this from mere talk. He thankfully didn’t mention it, though James could smell his smugness oozing in the air like thick perfume.

It didn’t matter, not when he had the man of his dreams on his lap. It seemed hardly possible. Although James knew he wasn’t dreaming, he nonetheless rested his hands on Keith’s hips, needing the touch to ground himself. The fabric of the shirt beneath his fingers was real, as was the heat radiating through it. He tightened his grip, grinding his hard dick against the curve of Keith’s butt in a bid to relieve a bit of pressure. It barely helped.

Keith leaned back until his head nearly rested on James’ shoulder. His long ponytail spilled over the back of the couch in a inky cascade, sweet smelling, a contrast to the sharp, heady odours of arousal. His lips were pulled up in a lazy half-smile, his cheeks reddened by the heat of their combined bodies.

He was so beautiful it made James’ whole being ache.

He slid his hands from Keith’s hips to his thighs, pulling them apart. Keith adjusted his position, putting his feet up on the couch rather than on the floor, making it easier to spread his legs. James could hardly believe he was going along with it without complaining; he must really be horny. He let his fingers roam over the warm skin of Keith’s legs, feeling the muscles twitch under his touch. Keith’s breathing had deepened and his chest heaved—no matter how cool he was playing this, there was no hiding he was liking it. Every time he shifted his ass rubbed against James’ dick, a sweet torture he did his best to ignore for the moment.

Once Keith was truly panting against his neck, he moved his right hand between his legs. There was already a wet patch on his panties. He bucked involuntarily, his breath catching in his throat. James grinned at finally getting an honest reaction out of him. His fingers traced lazy patterns over the panties, pressing gently over the wet spot. Keith’s cunt burned through the fabric, growing wetter by the second. James pressed harder, pushing both his finger and the fabric into his hole a bit. Keith’s hips twitched, which in return made James’ dick twitch in his too-tight pants. Keith spread his legs further in a silent plea.

James let his probing fingers glide lower before dragging them up again slowly. The panties were drenched now. He cupped his palm over Keith’s cunt, pressing down, rubbing the heel of his hand over his clit. Keith bucked, a moan escaping from his lips without shame.

Using his free hand, James grabbed Keith’s ponytail and pulled his head back until their cheeks were brushing. The tight grip definitely did something to Keith; he got wetter and his cunt throbbed under James’ hand. His legs were shaking and he kept rubbing his butt against James’ cock.

Fuck, he could hardly think. His mouth was dry. He felt as if he’d come in his pants right away at the sight Keith offered. He kept teasing him, having to focus on the task far more than he pretended. Although Keith was smothering his moans and whimpers by biting into his hand, James heard every tiny sharp exhale, every groan. He could tell that Keith was a screamer, that he’d be moaning at the top of his voice if they were alone. His cock twitched at the thought—he’d have to get Keith alone somewhere just to hear that gravelly, low voice get higher in pitch. He wanted to hear Keith yell until his voice broke, until he got hoarse.

Keith gripped his wrist and pushed his hand harder against his cunt.

“That’s it, show me how you like it,” James murmured.

Keith made a strangled sound at the back of his throat. He guided his hand, moving it over his panties in a slow, torturous pattern that pulled gasps from his throat. He was shaking, panting, back arching into the touch.

James wished they had all night. He knew he’d never get tired of hearing Keith’s moans and gasps, but they had to be finished within half an hour. He freed his hand from the other’s grasp and slipped it down inside the drenched panties. He finally got his first real touch of Keith’s cunt. It throbbed, wet and warm and ready. James gritted his teeth, biting back an embarrassing noise of his own. He couldn’t quite see what he was doing over Keith’s shoulder and it was a pity. He told himself it didn’t matter, he could look later. Later he’d fuck Keith good and eat him out and make him come and cry for hours.

He pushed two fingers inside Keith’s wet hole. Keith whined, squeezing around him almost painfully. He reached down, touching himself through the panties, rubbing his clit in a way that made his hips jerk.

“Fuck, Keith, you’re so hot,” James breathed against his neck.

He tasted salty skin. His teeth came dangerously close to that spot just beneath Keith’s ear that begged to be bitten. James grazed his teeth over it, relishing the jolt of pleasure it sent through Keith’s spine. Keith’s back bowed beautifully as he gasped, biting hard on his own hand to strangle his shout.

James pushed another finger into that tight, warm heat, crooking them. Keith shook in his arms, body covered in sweat. James gave one tug on his ponytail before falling to his chest to pinch one nipple through his shirt.

Keith came with a muffled, breathy shout, whole body quivering. James kept pumping his fingers inside him, pushing him through his orgasm until he’d gone completely lax in his embrace. Carefully, he pulled his drenched fingers free. Instead of taking them out of Keith’s panties, he slid them further down his ass until they reached his other hole. He circled it, feeling Keith twitch against him tiredly.

“I’d finger you there if we had time,” James murmured, nuzzling his cheek.

“I’d let you,” Keith replied softly. He turned his head, eyes still as lustful as before. “We still have a few minutes.”

“You’re insatiable.”

Keith hummed appreciatively when James carefully inserted his wet middle finger in his hole. He rolled his hips, taking it deeper easily, touching himself lazily at the same time.

“Can you come again?” James asked.

Keith closed his eyes, tiling his head back, exposing his soft throat in a total display of trust. He gave a tiny nod.

“Another finger,” he said, “don’t move.”

James obliged. The angle was wrong, hurting his wrist, but he’d be damned if he disobeyed. He could feel Keith twitching around him while he rubbed slow circles around his clit, slowly building up his pleasure. James watched him work himself up, watched the movement of his hand half-hidden inside those ruined panties. He knew what he was doing, knew exactly what to do. He’d done it often, and this sent another shiver of pleasure down James’ spine. He’d come in his pants earlier without noticing; Keith surely felt the wet patch against his butt.

“James,” Keith half sobbed, rubbing himself faster, the movement more erratic as he got closer to his climax. “Fuck, I’m gonna—”

He came with a breathy sigh, body shaking. Once the trembling had stopped, James gently pulled his fingers out. He’d thought that, now that it was over, Keith would get up, move away briskly and be on his way again. He didn’t. He just slumped there, heavy and utterly satiated, his breathing slowly returning to normal.

“Keith, can I kiss you?”

Keith laughed breathily. “You just had two fingers up my ass and now you ask to kiss me?”

James’ cheeks went hot. He didn’t have time to answer that Keith was twisting in his embrace, crashing their lips together. He turned until they were face to face, kneeling over James, tugging at his hair. He kissed like he did everything else: brutally, unapologetically, with teeth and little finesse.

“I’ll suck your dick next time,” he said, pulling back to look James in the eye. There was a devilish smirk on his red lips. “You’ve been a good, selfless alpha. You deserve it.” He touched the wet spot on the crotch of James’ pants. “And then I’ll let you fuck me.”

James ran his hands up and down Keith’s side before letting them settle on his ass. He squeezed the perky flesh as he had dreamed of doing for years.

“I’d like that. I’d like that very much.”

They were nose to nose, their breaths mingling. From this close, James could see every shade of purple in Keith’s eyes. Keith looked relaxed, the unhappy lines around his mouth and eyes smoothed away. He bowed his head until his forehead rested on James’ shoulder. He was purring contentedly, apparently not in a hurry to move away.

James wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him into a hug.

It wasn’t love, but it was still good.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Yesterday I didn’t have the promise of a date with you.”
> 
> This hadn’t been what he’d meant to say. His face flushed at what this implied.
> 
> Keith looked up, quirking an eyebrow. Though he had painted a sardonic expression on his features, there was no hiding the pinkness tinting his cheeks. “Really? You’re ready to sacrifice a certain second chance with him for the illusion of a chance with me?”
> 
> “Is that what this is? An illusion? I’m not so sure. I think you want a chance with me, Keith, that you’re simply too proud or too shy to admit it.”
> 
> Surprise rippled across Keith’s face. He leaned back, eyes going wide and flush deepening. “And why would I want a chance with you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there everybody! Welcome to chapter 15! 
> 
> Are you ready for more bonding and more adorable moments between James and Keith? I hope you are! In this chapter, we also hear from Pidge who confirms some of Keith's and James' past suspicions.
> 
> Also, please note there are very light mentions of PTSD. Proceed with caution if this is a problem for you.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and commenting!

A date. Of everything else that had happened yesterday, the one thing that stuck into James’ mind was the fact that Keith had agreed to go on a date with him. He silently apologized to Captain Shirogane while mentally dancing a little jig. This was unexpected. He had never dared hope for anything of the sort. He’d kissed Keith, had had his hand down his pants twice already, had held his son, had held his hand, and now there was the promise of a date in the near future.

He didn’t dare question just yet _why_ Keith had accepted. He was afraid that Keith was merely humouring him, taking pity on him after the debacle his relationship with Alex had been. It didn’t sound like Keith, but James was finding that many of the assumptions he’d had about the other man were false. He liked this new person he was beginning to know.

He was falling in love all over again, and this time he was actually falling for Keith rather than for the image of Keith James had.

“Do you like fireworks, poppet?” James asked Sven after he’d read in the informative pamphlet there would be fireworks later in the evening.

Apparently, an eclipse was scheduled to happen late in the afternoon. This was an event that took place four times a year and by which the Miziprans built their calendar. It more or less coincided with the changing of the seasons, or so James had understood. This was a great occasion for rejoicing and merrymaking, hence the fireworks.

Sven frowned. “What’s that?”

“He’s never seen any,” Keith supplied, busy texting one of his Paladin friends. “I’m not fond of them.”

“Oh. I could take him, I don’t mind.” And to Sven: “Fireworks are big, colourful explosions in the sky. They aren’t dangerous, but they make a lot of noise.”

“Lot of noise?” Seven asked.

“Yes. Do you mind loud noises?”

“No. Big noises on the ship! Blam blam blam! Daddy say bad men attack us!”

James quirked an eyebrow at Keith who mouthed the word _simulation_.

“I see. Well, it’s very loud, but not dangerous at all, not like bad men. Would you like to see them? Perhaps we could ask Zethrid and Ezor to join us.”

Sven considered him a moment, eyebrows lowered in a thoughtful frown. “Okay,” he decided with a shrug. He looked at his father. “Dada?”

“You can go, I don’t mind,” Keith said. “You have to promise you’ll be nice and listen to James, however.”

Sven stood up straight and gave a military salute. “I will, dada!”

Keith chuckled and reached out to pat his son’s hair. So much sweetness was making James’ teeth ache.

He couldn’t stop thinking that Keith had agreed to go on a date with him, and it seemed to make everything brighter, better. Even though he didn’t want to assume too much, he couldn’t help fantasizing a little. What if he managed to woo Keith during that date? What if it was the first of many more? He imagined it, the two of them accompanied by Sven walking the fairgrounds, playing the little chance games, eating junk food, watching Sven have fun in the kiddie rides, taking dozens of blurry selfies to later remember that unforgettable night. Perhaps he’d even be allowed to hold Keith’s hand or pull him in a darkened corner to steal a kiss while Sven was looking the other way. Maybe there’d be cuddles once Sven had fallen asleep on the way home.

He texted his friends to tell them good news. Ryan answered later that Nadia was already planning the wedding and what kind of cake toppers would he like?

James’ head was so high in the clouds that he didn’t see the day go by. He smiled dopily at Keith, listened to Sven babble about something or another, even accepted to fetch food without making a fuss. The weird colours of Mizipra appeared more vibrant. Suddenly, the happy couples that strolled by no longer turned his stomach.

He was acting like a damn teenager and he couldn’t bring himself to care. He knew the feelings would eventually pass, that he’d soon return to his more logical, down-to-earth self who’d start questioning everything. For the moment however, he was content with this high of happiness.

It made him realise that he hadn’t been this happy for a long, long time. The last time had to be at the beginning of his relationship with Alex when everything had been jolly and good and beautiful. Ever since the break-up, it was as if there’d been a dark pall over James’ eyes darkening the world.

This was ridiculous.

He didn’t care.

In the afternoon, Keith put Sven to bed for his nap, reminding him that he had to sleep if he wanted to see the fireworks that evening. Sven was already looking excited about it. He didn’t seem to want to settle down, talking excitedly about fireworks after James had showed him some videos on his phone. Finally, exhaustion got the better of the boy. He fell asleep half-sitting up, James’ phone clutched in his hands.

There sadly wasn’t a repeat of yesterday’s fun time, but Keith did ask him for a foot massage after he’d come back from his jog. James obliged all too willingly. Somehow, just sitting next to Keith on the couch was as good as having any kind of sex with him. He loved observing Keith’s face while he read or watched a video, loved seeing him relax and take his ease. Once a while, a low, soft purr would rumble in Keith’s chest that he would stifle immediately, though not before James had heard it. It made him proud, knowing that Keith felt content and safe enough around him to purr.

James was a sap. One promised date was enough to send him on cloud number nine. He almost wished he hadn’t told Nadia she was being too hasty with her marriage arrangements.

“Oh!” Keith exclaimed, sitting up right. “It’s Pidge! She finished analyzing the data we sent her!”

He opened a video chat with her and, soon, her face appeared on the holoscreen projected on the wall. As always she looked a bit harassed, like she’d been run off her feet one time too many. Her brown hair was wild and there was an excited look in her eyes. She grinned hugely the second the call connected.

“ _Hey! I got something interesting for you guys!”_ she said. She looked away for a moment, apparently reading something from another screen, before turning her attention to them again. “ _So, yeah, you were right, Keith, there was a lot of info on that computer. Mostly, it contains the logbook of the arrivals and departures. In it, there’s the confirmation that Shiro’s vessel really landed at the scheduled date and hour._ ” Characters flashed across the screen, the same cuneiform letters James had spotted on every placards on the compound. “ _This more or less spells Shiro’s name. It’s also mentioned once next to the hut where he was staying and another time listing the electronic signature of the bracelet he was wearing. I’ve studied those too by the way, Keith. It’s pretty primitive stuff. From what I’ve gathered, Mizipra got handed all kinds of different technologies once they joined the Coalition. It is indeed a tracking device. I cross-referenced the coordinates from Shiro’s and Curtis’ bracelets with what was written in that itinerary he sent Commander Iverson. Here, let me send it to you._ ”

On the holoscreen, Holt’s face was replaced by a map of the compound. James had become familiar with it over the past few days. Shiny red dots had been placed over the locations the captain and the lieutenant had visited. Everything seemed to check out.

“That one,” Keith said, pointing. “James, isn’t that the forest?”

Dread slithered down James’ spine. He looked at the spot Keith was indicating and, yes, this seemed to be the forest where they’d gone off the trail to accidently stumble upon the weird wall. According to this, the captain had also found it and had also investigated it.

Keith explained to Holt what they had discovered in the forest and her face grew grim.

“ _I’ll try getting satellite pictures of the area, maybe it can help_ ,” she said, visibly jotting down notes. “ _Shiro apparently visited that spot nearly a full week before his disappearance, so I’m not sure the two can be linked. I’ll see what I can do about this, Keith. His bracelet went dead after he disappeared so we cannot pinpoint his location, sadly. You’re going to that fair tomorrow?_ ”

“Yes. Assmiya and Assilsa said people were disappearing after visiting. We need to check it out.”

“ _All right. Just let me know when you’re back, okay? I really don’t want Iverson to use this excuse to send me over there to look for both you_ and _Shiro._ ”

Keith chuckled. “This won’t happen, don’t worry. James and I will keep our guard up.”

Holt narrowed her eyes. “ _Uh, you’re on first name basis now. Interesting._ ”

James cleared his throat. “Using our last name while we’re supposed to be a couple would have been suspicious.”

“ _Right. By the way, Griffin, Leif wanted me to tell you some blond bloke stopped by the see you earlier today._ ”

Flushing with both embarrassment and annoyance, James glanced at his phone to see he had three unread messages. This was probably Ina, Nadia, and Ryan texting him about this incident.

He pasted a bland smile on his face. “Duly noted. Thank you, Holt.”

“ _I’ll check the data one last time in case I missed something, Keith. I’ll send you any information I find via my favourite encrypted hailing frequency. It’s secure so don’t worry about any leaks. Otherwise, I’ll be waiting for you to call in tomorrow. Have fun, boys._ ”

The screen went dark.

“That wasn’t very helpful,” James muttered.

“Damn it, I’d hoped Shiro would still have his bracelet. We could have tracked his exact location easily with it. I suppose the Miziprans aren’t as dumb as they look.”

“They aren’t dumb,” James said, feeling the need to defend their host.

Keith threw him an exasperated look. “Well, if they aren’t dumb they’re bastards. They kidnapped Shiro, James. Shiro, and apparently many other folks. We don’t know why, we don’t even know if they’re still alive.”

The note of despair in Keith’s voice sobered James up. He kept quiet, pondering this. Keith was right; they still had no idea what happened to the people who’d disappeared. Anything was possible—they could be hurt or killed or sold into slavery.

“Let’s not jump to conclusion,” James said weakly. “We both know Captain Shirogane wouldn’t have gone down without a fight.”

Keith rolled his eyes. “It doesn’t matter how strong Shiro is if he’s been drugged or poisoned or whatever!” He rubbed his face, groaning. “Ugh, this is Kerberos all over again!”

“Keith, amongst everybody, you’re the only one who never believed the captain had died on Kerberos. When he was thought to have been killed by Emperor Zarkon, you apparently never stopped looking for him. Don’t despair now.”

Such devotion. James had been the first to mock Keith when he’d yelled at anyone who was willing to listen that the captain hadn’t crashed the Kerberos ship, that he was still alive, that the Garrison had to plan a rescue mission. Nobody had listened. More often than not, Lieutenant Wagner had had to step in, excusing Keith, dragging him away before he got himself into further trouble. Never once had Keith’s beliefs wavered. Hell, had he had the time, he’d probably have gone on a rescue mission on his own by stealing a ship or something equally dangerous.

If that wasn’t love, James didn’t know what true love looked like.

A tiny seed of jealousy tried to sprout in his heart. Ruthlessly, he plucked it away, not wanting it to take root. Being jealous of Shirogane would be like being jealous of the sun: utterly useless. James had come to accept a long time ago that he’d always come second to the captain in Keith’s affections. Even in his wildest daydreams in which Keith and he married, had eight children, and lived in a beautiful house surrounded by a white picket fence, Shirogane had been part of it to an extent.

James admired this, admired Keith’s singlemindedness when it came to protect his own. He’d been fiercely protective of his pack during the war, taking care of them, making sure they were all right and that they were lacking for nothing. He’d looked after his team the way a true leader ought to. Even before that, during their cadet days, Keith had been protective of Shirogane and Wagner, though it had been more comically pathetic than praise-worthy.

Keith looked at him, seemed to _really_ look at him like James had said something totally unexpected. Although his expression didn’t soften, the light in his eyes changed. “Yeah, you’re right.” He touched his own chest. “I know Shiro’s alive. I feel it here, just like I felt it when he supposedly died on Kerberos.”

“Nobody believed you then, but I think you’ve proven us wrong a few times.”

A small smile tugged at the corners of Keith’s mouth. “That’s true.”

He glanced sideways towards Sven’s half-closed bedroom door. He wanted the captain to be alive for his own sake, but also for the sake of their son.

James waited, certain that the weight of this would crush him. It didn’t. He waited and waited, but all he felt was acceptance. He hadn’t expected this. Alphas never liked when other alphas were brought up. Most divorced or separated couples had trouble with this because an alpha had difficulties accepting another alpha’s child, especially if the parent was still in the picture. Nadia had often recounted her own childhood and how her alpha mother had made life difficult for her omega father’s new mate.

The thing was that James and Keith weren’t a couple. It wasn’t some groping nor was it the vague promise of a date that changed this. Yet, over the past few days, James had come to feel, if not territorial, at least protective towards both Keith and Sven. Knowing that Shirogane’s shadow lurked at the edge of Keith’s life was a certainty, and it now seemed likely that Keith wanted to introduce Sven to his other father. If the result of that date ended up in them being a couple, James would have to get used to Shirogane’s presence because he knew without doubt that the man would want to be part of his son’s life. Shirogane loved children and was dutiful to the bone—there was no way in hell he’d let Keith fade away with Sven again. He’d want to be present in his son’s life.

This was something James would have to accept. There was also the question of whether Lieutenant Miller would agree to this arrangement. From what James knew of him, the lieutenant was a nice, open-minded man, so it was unlikely he wouldn’t want Sven to be part of Shirogane’s life.

What that link between Shirogane and Keith would do for their past friendship, James had no idea. Would it rekindle the old flame in Keith’s heart? Would it pull them closer?

This was a terrifying prospect that James didn’t want to think about.

“That blond guy Pidge mentioned,” Keith began after a while, “was it…?”

“Yeah.” James sighed. Yet something else he’d rather put out of his mind.

“Is it like him to be this insistent?”

“Not really.”

“He must miss you terribly then.”

The note in Keith’s voice made James look up. Keith had his head down, black hair falling over his face while he browsed on his phone. What had that hint been in his tone? Uncertainty? Sadness? Or was it simply James’ wistful thinking talking? Yet he couldn’t deny the way Keith’s shoulders were hunched, like he was bracing himself for a blow.

“Even if he does, I’m not going back with him.”

Keith scoffed. “You didn’t sound so certain yesterday.”

“Yesterday I didn’t have the promise of a date with you.”

This hadn’t been what he’d meant to say. His face flushed at what this implied.

Keith looked up, quirking an eyebrow. Though he had painted a sardonic expression on his features, there was no hiding the pinkness tinting his cheeks. “Really? You’re ready to sacrifice a certain second chance with him for the illusion of a chance with me?”

“Is that what this is? An illusion? I’m not so sure. I think you _want_ a chance with me, Keith, that you’re simply too proud or too shy to admit it.”

Surprise rippled across Keith’s face. He leaned back, eyes going wide and flush deepening. “And why would I want a chance with you?”

Oh, they were stumbling into dangerous territory. James’ heart drummed fast and hard inside his chest. He was going out on a limb here, betting a lot on what he thought he’d felt from Keith. “I don’t know why, I simply think you do. You wouldn’t have allowed yourself to become close to me otherwise. You wouldn’t have allowed me such freedom with you and your son.”

Silence stretched between the two of them. Neither broke eye contact. James wondered if Keith could hear his heartbeat from across the room. His smell was convoluted, a mix of too many things to be named. He didn’t get angry or deny the whole thing out of hand, which gave James the tiniest of hope.

“You are a good guy,” Keith admitted, voice low, eyes averted. “You’re hard-headed and difficult and self-righteous and full of outdated ideas, but you’re not bad. You’ve proven to me that you’ve changed and that you’re willing to change. You’ve become someone I can respect. You’re a good colleague.”

A good colleague. James tried not to be disappointed by this. He’d hoped Keith would say that he was a good friend. Colleague put a distance between them, made it sound like their relationship was purely professional. And maybe it was. It hadn’t crossed James’ mind until now that Keith might have simply played a role so far. They were supposed to be a couple, and maybe Keith was playing that role.

That thought didn’t gain traction. It simply made no sense when put under the harsh light of everything that had happened. James would have believed him if Keith hadn’t accepted the date. Everything else, he could have chalked up as Keith acting. Not that.

Perhaps this was difficult for Keith far more than it was for James. James had long ago come to grasp with his feelings for the other. He’d long ago realised his hatred for the unruly little omega who sat by the window in the classroom had been misplaced love. During the invasion, Keith had come to see him as a colleague, nothing more. Now that they had spent nearly a week together, it was possible that his feelings were slowly changing, confusing him, making him see James from a more flattering angle.

James nodded. “Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself.”

Mirth shone in Keith’s big eyes. “Yeah. I try. That guy who dumped you is an idiot. He had a good alpha and he didn’t know it. I’ll tell him, once we’re back on Earth.”

“After our date.”

“After our date.”

-

Perhaps choosing to bring Ezor and Zethrid hadn’t been the smartest of ideas. James could feel Ezor’s amused gaze boring at the back of his head. Ever since they’d _accidently_ met on the path leading to the beach, she’d had that knowing grin plastered on her face. Once in a while, she made a show of sniffing towards him, certainly picking up Keith’s scent mingling with his own.

Was it always going to be this way if Keith and he ever dated? Would every member of the Blade of Marmora look at him either in amusement or in suspicion? Would he get the shovel talk from two dozen people; two dozen huge, lethal, deadly Galras who could snap his neck without breaking a sweat? Would Keith’s _mom_ warn him that he was dead the second he hurt her son?

Hell, would Captain Shirogane join in, never quite threatening but making it known that James’ life was forfeit if he hurt Keith?

James shivered at the thought. He’d go through all of this happily for a chance with Keith, yet there was no denying the terrifying aspect that Keith’s adoptive family was made of highly-trained killers. There was also his pack to take into consideration…

“I’m so glad you’re having fun with the boss,” Ezor purred, leaning close to him.

James leaned back a bit. “Uh, yes. There’s no need for the shovel talk; Zethrid already gave it to me.”

Ezor laughed. “That’s not what I had in mind at all! It’s simply nice seeing the boss having a bit of fun for once! He’s always so serious and focused on his work.”

The path leading to the beach was full of people. They were all converging to a bump in the land from which they’d be able to see the eclipse and the fireworks. Already, the large moon was advancing menacingly towards the twin suns. From what James had read, they wouldn’t be quite covered yet, just enough to provide the illusion of night. Had it not been for the fireworks, he would have used that opportunity to sleep in a dark room not half-lit by a reddish glow.

The colours of the landscape were muted, greyed by the early twilight. There was a creepiness to it that reminded James of old-school horror movies. The aliens around him didn’t seem to feel it however; they talked excitedly amongst themselves, pointing towards the darkening sky. Even the children appeared to be looking forward to the night’s event. There was some kind of beauty to it despite it, James had to admit. Looking skywards, he saw millions of silvery stars slowly blinking into visibility. Suddenly, he wished that Keith were here by his side so they could hold hands.

The hand that tugged at his was small however. James looked down to see Sven with his arms held up, silently asking to be picked up. James obeyed readily, resting the young boy on his hip easily. Keeping one hand gripping James’ shirt tight, Sven pointed upwards at the slowly-disappearing suns, asking what was happening.

James explained what an eclipse was, choosing his words carefully so that a boy of three could understand the natural phenomenon without being scared by it. There was no trace of fear on Sven’s young face however. He looked fascinated, his big black eyes reflecting the light of the stars overhead. Both his parents had been fascinated by the infinite universe, so there was a chance that passion would be passed down to their son too. Despite being only three, Sven had certainly seen more of space than James had in his twenty-seven years. Despite this, his attention never wavered once while James explained. The fascination in his features reminded James of his younger self during his first days as a cadet at the Garrison.

By the time, they reached their destination, the landscape had been plunged into an early grey twilight. The frothy pink waters of the ocean looked dark, almost red in places. The chatter grew in excitement as the large moon nearly covered the two suns, leaving around it only a thin circle of fire. It was nearly as beautiful as it was creepy.

Beside him, Ezor and Zethrid talked in low voices, commenting wryly that this scenery reminded them of some other place James has never heard of. All around him, couples were moving closer to each other, holding hands, looking up skywards with growing excitement.

The first loud bang of the firework startled James. His whole body tensed and he had to fight the urge to look around for any enemies. He kept his focus on Sven’s warmth and weight in his arms, telling himself that he hadn’t held a kid when the Galras attacked back on Earth. It helped, though he did twitch every few minutes at the explosions happening in the sky. Not once did Sven avert his eyes from the burst of colours high overhead. He giggled and clapped his hands, especially when the fizzles of lights coalesced to form an image. It was pretty impressive, much more than the fireworks James was used to.

After a while, tension oozed out of his limbs enough to allow him to enjoy the sights. He glanced around himself every few minutes out of habit, taking in the crowd, making sure nobody came close enough to jostle him while he had Sven in his arms.

The eclipse lasted no more than thirty minutes. Already, the sky was lightening when the fireworks ended. The greyish colours of the landscape changed, replaced by a reddish glow before trueing to their more original shades. Young children began to cry, tired after so much excitement. The beach emptied itself quickly, aliens of all sorts making their way back to their huts.

The mingled scents of so many species left James reeling a little. At Sven’s insistence, they walked closer to the shore. The boy removed his shoes and stepped further onto the beach until frothy water licked at his naked feet. He bent down to scoop up a handful of wet sand, shaping it into forms that made sense only in his young mind. James stood there for a moment with his hands in his pant pockets, admiring the sight. The odd colours notwithstanding, this was what his life could have been if things had been different.

Lukewarm water splashed the back of his head, starling him out of his reverie. He turned, eyes wide, to see Ezor giggling madly with an empty bucket in her hands. She dashed away with a mad laugh while Zethrid just plopped down on the sand with a roll of her eyes. James stared as droplets slid down the back of his shirt, too surprised to react. From a safe distance away, Ezor pulled a face at him.

“Very mature,” James grumbled, amused nonetheless.

“If she hadn’t liked you, she’d have thrown you into the waves directly,” Zethrid commented with a fond groan.

James watched as Ezor picked Sven up and whirled him around while the boy shrieked with laughter. She pretended to drop him and he yelled even louder.

“It’s a good thing I can swim,” he retorted.

“Oh, she’d have thrown you after tying boulders around your ankles.”

“Is that the shovel talk?”

Zethrid snorted a laugh. “No! I already gave it to you, little alpha. I’m not very worried about the boss, you know that.”

Little alpha. The words didn’t sting. In fact, they sounded fond, the way an adult called a child _kid_ without being condescending. It was simply a fact: James was indeed a small alpha compared to the huge mountain of muscles that was Zethrid.

“Keith agreed on going on a date with me,” James said, suddenly needing to share the news.

Zethrid turned to look at him, one eyebrow cocked. “Is that so? That’s improvement. Nobody ever got a date with the boss.”

“Not even the biggest, meanest alphas of the Blade?”

“Oh, no. The furthest they every go is into his space while training. He bedded a few of them, but that was before Sven.”

“Then why me?” James asked, honestly puzzled.

What could Keith possibly see in him that he didn’t see in any other alpha of the Blade of Marmora? He had seemed to want to cut all ties with his human roots, and the next logical step would have been to date a Galra.

Zethrid snorted. “You think the boss shares his heart’s content with me? I don’t know why he’s affording you so much leeway. You’re not bad for a human alpha, but there are many candidates far worthier than you for his hand.” She shrugged. “I never understood him anyway—it’s been five years and I still don’t understand why he saved my life that time. You’ll have to ask him what he sees in you.”

James sat beside her, pondering this. A few feet away, Ezor chased after a laughing Sven. Glancing out the corner of his eye, he noticed a wistful expression on Zethrid’s face. Was she looking at her mate playing with a kid and wishing the child was their own? If that were the case, he understood her. Every time he saw Keith with Sven, a tiny part of himself imagined it was his own child Keith was cradling, his own son or daughter that Keith was taking care of.

By the time Ezor and Sven joined them, the boy was half-asleep on his feet. He sat beside Ezor and fell asleep against her in a matter of second, totally unbothered by his wet clothes.

“Poor baby is exhausted,” Ezor cooed, combing her fingers through the boy’s black hair. She grinned at Zethrid. “Can we keep him overnight?”

Zethrid shrugged. “I don’t mind. Ask the boss though. He nearly tore you apart last time you didn’t bring Sven back at the appointed time.”

Ezor giggled. She used a sort of commutator to send Keith a message and smiled broadly when the answer to her question was positive.

James didn’t think anything of it until she said, eyes conspiratorial: “There. You have the whole night with the boss. Don’t waste it!”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Since Sven’s staying with Ezor and Zethrid tonight,” Keith declared, leaning against the doorjamb, arms crossed over his chest. “You know what that means?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Thank you so much for reading and for leaving comments! Here is the new chapter!
> 
> I want to dedicate this to the person who's been leaving comments about how the fic is okay but would be better if I'd written James as the omega and Keith as the alpha. Have fun reading Keith getting rawed by James' big alpha dick :)
> 
> **Please beware that this chapter is mostly smut and that it contains afab language.**

“Since Sven’s staying with Ezor and Zethrid tonight,” Keith declared, leaning against the doorjamb, arms crossed over his chest. “You know what that means?”

Hell, yes did James know what this meant. Ever since that little episode on the couch, they’d had their hands on each other at every chance. Whenever Sven’s back was turned, they groped and kissed and touched, the few minutes never enough to be satisfying. Keith steadfastly refused to downright have sex while Sven was in the same house, so they’d been stuck with the heavy petting. James was going half-mad with it already. Keith knew he was driving him crazy—he was having fun with it, teasing him relentlessly. He’d touch his crotch with his foot under the table or sneak a hand down his pants while they were out, sometimes not even waiting until they were in private. He undressed in front James, pranced about half naked with only a towel wrapped around his hips, and made the lewdest comments. At breakfast that morning, he’d shoved a banana-like fruit down his throat like it was nothing, not once breaking eye-contact.

James was dying. The problem was that he was liking every second of it. He knew this was only a game for Keith; he was doing this to pass the time and get rid of his growing frustration at not finding Captain Shirogane. Nevertheless, there was no denying James liked playing along. It hardly mattered that he’d up broken-hearted; for the moment, he simply wanted to enjoy the ride. He’d deal with the emotional fallout after.

“You sound happy to be rid of your son to be dicked by me,” James said, playing it cool.

Keith laughed. “Don’t flatter yourself, Griffin, it’s like a holiday for him.”

“A holiday for us too.”

Keith grinned. “Yeah, true.” He walked further into the bedroom, eyes dark. “So, what should I do first? I must admit you did surprise me last time. I really didn’t expect you to be so selfless. Maybe I should return the favour?”

James’ mouth went dry. Keith knelt in front of him, resting his elbows on his knees, looking up at him through the black fringe of his hair. He looked gorgeous merely kneeling there, face upturned, cheeks slightly coloured. James reached out to trace his cheekbone. He then gently ran the pad of his thumb over the upturned curve of his plush lips. Keith didn’t bite him; he opened his mouth and nipped playfully.

“You’re so beautiful,” James breathed, unable to stop himself. “It’s not even fair.”

“You’re not so bad yourself.” He pushed James’ knees open and inched closer until he could nuzzle the inside of his thigh. “You’re a lot more handsome than in my memories, thankfully.”

James didn’t say anything. Keith’s face was close enough to his crotch that he could feel his breath. He was already half-hard. Keith leaned in to press a kiss to his clothed erection. He undid James’ pants, using his teeth to pull down the zipper. He tugged the pants down as far as they would go, revealing the tented underwear. He leaned in again, pressing small kisses all over the hardening dick. James forced himself to breathe through his nose, not wanting to get too aroused too fast. Easier said than done; it wasn’t only the mouth on his dick getting him hot, it was also that he only had to look down to see Keith’s head bent between his legs. Keith’s _head bent between his legs_. He had to resist the urge to pinch himself.

When Keith finally pulled his dick out of his underwear, he hissed at the contact of cool air against his heated flesh. Keith wrapped his fingers tight around the base of his dick, squeezing where the knot would form. He pumped his hand a few times, tearing a groan from between James’ gritted teeth. Pleasure already sparked in his belly that he did his best to suppress. Keith dragged his tongue the length of his dick, making sure to keep eye contact as he did so. The sheer lust in his gaze was like a punch to James’ chest. He wasn’t doing this only to please James; he was enjoying it.

James grabbed a fistful of his ponytail. “Come on, sweetheart. Use that pretty mouth of yours.”

Keith grinned and obeyed readily. James’ dick was engulfed into tight, wet heat. He bucked involuntarily and Keith took it easily, not gagging when the dick hit the back of his throat. He swallowed around the tip, mindful of his teeth. James hissed and forced his head down until he’d swallowed all of his dick. Keith didn’t tense, didn’t appear distressed so James kept his grip in his hair. The fingers of his other hand were clasped tightly on the comforter. Finally, Keith started bobbing his head. He allowed James to guide his movements by pulling on his hair.

The pressure around his dick was amazing, just enough to be good without being overwhelming. Keith used his hand where his mouth couldn’t quite reach and when he had to pull back to take a breath. If he cared that James was practically fucking his mouth, it didn’t show. He hummed around the length, the vibrations sending a burning shiver down James’ spine.

“You want me to come into your mouth?”

Keith made a noise that sounded like assent. James tightened his grip in his hair, wrapping long black strands around his fist. Keith moaned at the pull on his scalp. He pulled back completely, catching his breath while peppering kisses and small licks all over James’ dick. With his head bent down, his face was impossible to see, but James had no difficulty imagining his red lips and his wrecked expression. He tugged Keith’s mouth over his dick again, knowing his climax was near. He bucked his hips once, twice, while his pleasure mounted like a tidal wave. Stars burst behind his closed eyelids as he came, burying his dick as far as it would go down Keith’s throat. Keith drank it all greedily, swallowing around him convulsively, prolonging the pleasure until it became almost unbearable.

He fell on his back with a groan, body shivering from the intensity of his orgasm. Holy shit, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d come this hard. It left him reeling.

“Good?” Keith asked, voice rough.

“Shit, yes.”

Keith threw himself on the bed beside him. James wrapped an arm around his waist to pull him closer. He kissed him, not caring that he was tasting himself on his tongue. There was a small smile on Keith’s lips as he kissed him back. There was softness here, a stark contrast to the roughness before.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” James asked, suddenly self-conscious.

Keith’s eyebrows climbed up his forehead. “What? Of course not. That was hot, actually. Who would have thought Straight A Student James would be rough, eh?”

James felt himself blush. “Right, hot. Thanks, I guess.”

Keith allowed himself to be pulled into another kiss. The press of lips heated up quickly until it was more a biting contest than anything. James loved the sounds Keith made when he dug his teeth into his bottom lip, loved the way Keith pressed against him, loved the smell that broadcasted his lust. He snaked a hand down their bodies to cup Keith’s crotch. Even through his jeans, James could feel the heat of his cunt. Keith grinded against him willingly enough, panting against his mouth.

He sat up. “Come on, on your back.”

“On my back? James, it’s boring on my back,” Keith complained, obeying nonetheless.

James swatted his thigh. “It’s not been boring so far, why would it be now? Stop complaining and spread your legs.”

Keith made a show of rolling his eyes, opening his legs enough to make room for James to sit between. He looked so gorgeous like that that James had to take a second to gather his bearings. Keith sprawled on the bed with his knees spread, his black hair fanned on the pale comforter, his face red nearly as much as his swollen lips. His shirt had ridden up a little, exposing a sliver of skin above the waistband of his jeans. It was the heat in his eyes that nearly undid James, however. The pure, unadulterated lust he read in them was enough to send a spark of renewed interest to his spent dick.

This might not be love, but it was a damn good replacement.

He once again cupped Keith’s cunt, pressing the heel of his hand against his clit and rubbing. Keith gasped, tilting his hips up a bit. There was a small, dreamy smile on his face. He raised his arms and tangled his own fingers in his hair, tugging. He was a sight to see, beautiful and flushed with his nipples hard under his shirt, his back arched just so. He could have been posing for the cover of some porn magazine, the picture perfect of every alpha’s wet dreams.

Unable to wait any longer, James hurriedly undid Keith’s pants with trembling fingers. Keith obligingly raised his hips to let him tug them and his panties down his legs. He was so damn perfect everywhere that James had absolutely no idea where to look. He wanted to worship those long, lean legs, drag his lips over the taut skin of those strong calves, taste the skin of his thighs, leave bite marks on the crease of his hips. Hell, he even wanted to kiss Keith’s surprisingly dainty feet, wanted to tease him and ask him how he could kick so hard with feet so small.

There was time to do all that, he told himself. Nonetheless, he dragged his hands over Keith’s thighs, digging his thumbs into the thick flesh, relishing the small red imprints left behind. Finally, he reached where he’d wished to go all along; the apex of those beautiful legs. Keith didn’t have much hair between his legs and what he had had been carefully trimmed. His cunt was wet, dripping on the comforter beneath him. James ran the back of his fingers lightly over it. It twitched while Keith took in a small breath. He wanted to taste it, to press his tongue into Keith, but for the moment he preferred to watch. He hadn’t been able to watch the last time he’d pushed his fingers into Keith’s warmth. He gently rubbed the tip of one finger down the slit before easing it into the wet hole. It went it easily. He moved it around a bit before adding a second finger. He rotated his wrist until he could press his thumb onto Keith’s clit. This sent a shudder coursing up Keith’s spine. His walls pulsed hard around James’ fingers, squeezing delightfully.

“You said you were going to use your mouth,” Keith reminded him, voice breathy.

James chuckled breathlessly. “Damn, you’re one demanding omega. Let a man set his own pace, won’t you?”

Keith bumped his shoulder with his knee, huffing.

Oh, well, why not obey? It wasn’t like he was demanding the impossible.

He’d barely leaned in that Keith was clutching his hair and shoving his face between his legs with a barked command to _get on with it_. James happily obliged. He nuzzled the soft inside of Keith’s thigh first, leaving a trail of kisses everywhere except where Keith wanted. His fingers were still in him but he’d stopped moving them for the moment while he tortured him a bit. Keith squirmed under him, tugging at his hair, hissing. When James finally put his mouth over his cunt, Keith _yelped_. He bucked and James had to hold his hips down.

Leaning on his elbows, he went to work. He replaced his fingers with his tongue, getting his first taste. Acrid and sharp and wholly Keith, it was enough to send a fresh wave of arousal to his now fully-hard dick. He shoved his tongue as far as it would go, adding back his two fingers beside. His mouth was flooded with flagrant slick. It made him feel like a thirsty man finally getting his first drink of sweet water. He couldn’t get enough of it. He moved up, his tongue tracing a path up Keith’s cunt until it reached his hard clit. He sucked on it, relishing the incoherent babble that spilled from Keith’s mouth. He moved his fingers and tongue in tandem. Keith’s cunt throbbed. His thighs clamped around James’ head, trapping him, forcing him to go on. He relished it, relished Keith’s unabashed neediness. It was unexpected—omegas weren’t supposed to be needy, weren’t supposed to be demanding, and yet this one was and James had never found anything more arousing.

He didn’t stop his ministrations until Keith came with a shout, back arching at an angle that had to be painful. Slick flooded James’ mouth, gushing over his fingers and down on the already wet coverlet. He pulled at James’ hair until he felt sure it would come out at the roots.

After he’d slumped on the bed, panting, James carefully removed his fingers. He placed a few more kisses over the swollen clit until Keith told him to stop. He sat back on his haunches, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Keith looked utterly debauched, hair wild around his red face.

“All right, you’re good with your mouth,” he said, smiling lazily.

“You think I’m done with you? Get on your hands and knees.”

Keith made an approving noise at the back of his throat and got on his hands and knees, arching his back. He presented so beautiful James’ breath caught. For a second, his brain cleared enough of the fog of lust to remind him this was his _crush_ with his ass in the air, ready to be mounted like any good omega. There was trust in Keith’s posture—James would have bet his left hand that he didn’t present himself this way to every alpha he bedded. It was a position of submission for an omega, and James felt oddly moved that Keith trusted him enough to lower his guard that way.

Lust mercifully reasserted itself quickly, stopping his sappy thoughts.

He dug his fingers into Keith’s fleshy butt, parting it to reveal his small hole. He ran a thumb over it, wondering if Keith would let him fuck him there eventually. Later, something else he wanted to do later. He ducked his head and ran his tongue over the hole, holding Keith firmly in place so he wouldn’t twitch away. Keith let out a breathy sigh, canting his hips up further by leaning on his elbows. James ran his tongue over the hole until it relaxed enough for him to push inside. Keeping one hand firmly on Keith’s hip, he snaked the other one between his wet thighs to run the pad of his forefinger over his clit. Keith moaned, not trying to muffle the sound. He didn’t seem to know whether he preferred to push his butt further onto James’ tongue or rub his cunt over his fingers. His own hand went to join James’, their wrists brushing while he hurriedly shoved three fingers into himself.

He came again with a muffled curse, slick spilling down his fingers to further wet the comforter. His legs shook as he tried not to collapse. James kissed the small of his back, his lips brushing the sweat-slicked skin. He helped him to lie on his side, grinning at his wrecked expression.

“Fuck, wait, don’t touch me,” he breathed, batting James away. “It’s oversensitive.”

James laughed. “What, already?”

“Give me a minute, jeez!”

“Sure, whatever you want.”

He combed Keith’s sweaty hair away from his forehead. It had come loose from the ponytail, falling like an oil slick around his shoulders. Keith leaned into the touch, purring, exuding a content smell that went straight to James’ heart.

“You realise we’re not even naked, right?” Keith said wryly.

James looked down at himself; he was still fully dressed with only his pants pulled down while Keith had his shirt on. He shrugged, got up, and removed the rest of his clothes. Keith watched him, eyes intent. James tried not to feel too self-conscious; he was good-looking, he knew, he just didn’t have the typical body type of an alpha. If Keith minded however, he hid it perfectly. There was a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth that was more appreciative than mocking.

James didn’t resist when Keith pulled on his arm and tugged him down into a kiss. There was little teeth involved this time. They’d both blunted their lust sufficiently that they didn’t feel the need to rush anymore. James was hard, but not painfully so, not enough to prevent him from appreciating the kiss. He cupped Keith’s sharp jaw, angling his head back, exposing his neck. He trailed his lips from Keith’s mouth to his pulse that he nipped at gently, not breaking the skin. It would leave a nice hickey, a mark of ownership those damn noisy Miziprans could gawk at.

“Don’t bite me,” Keith warned. “Do whatever you want, but don’t bite me there.”

“Of course not,” James mumbled, nipping again and again all over that long, slender neck.

He knew Keith didn’t want a bond, and it was harder to resist than James had imagined. Not wishing to be tempted beyond his endurance, he trailed his kisses down to Keith’s jutting collarbones, tugging at the collar of his shirt. He ran his hands lightly over Keith’s chest, rubbing the fabric over his hard nipples, eliciting a small moan from him. Suddenly annoyed by it, James grabbed the hem of the shirt and pulled it up. It left his chest nearly fully bared, exposing his pink nipples. James bent his head to run his tongue over one of them, rubbing the other between his thumb and forefinger. Keith arched into the touch with a contented sigh, running his fingers through James’ hair, holding his head in place. Just like any other omega who’d given birth, Keith’s chest wasn’t quite flat. There was some residual swelling, a vestige of the time he’d breastfed his son.

“Enough,” he panted, tugging at James’ hair. “Enough. Fuck me now.”

James reluctantly pulled back. His dick twitched happily at Keith’s words. “Do you want me to use a rubber?”

“No. I’m clean.”

Keith grinned and, before he knew what was happening, James was flipped on his back and Keith was on top of him, straddling his hips. He loomed over him, black hair spilling, creating a curtain. It fell over James’ face in strands as soft as silk.

“You didn’t really think I’d let you be on top, did you?”

James scoffed. He grabbed Keith’s hips. “I don’t know why I’m surprised. Come on, sweetheart, get to work.”

Keith chuckled. He grabbed James’ dick and slowly lowered himself down. He threw his head back with a soft moan, thighs trembling. James had to resist the urge to buck into that wet heat. He held still, afraid of hurting Keith in his eagerness. He gave Keith time to adjust, knowing this was necessary. His grip tightened on the other’s hips.

The small pause before Keith started moving was just enough for James to realise that, holy shit, he was _inside_ Keith. Then, Keith was moving and all thoughts were obliterated. What little blood he’d had left in his brain rushed south eagerly. Keith pulled himself up and down tentatively a few times, adjusting. He was squeezing James’ dick like a vice. Then, he relaxed and the pressure relented somewhat. He braced his hands on James’ chest and began riding him in earnest.

The sounds that left Keith’s mouth were nearly as hot as the cunt squeezing his dick. Filthy language spewed like a litany, half of them making no sense whatsoever. He was whining and moaning, head bent, legs flexing apparently tirelessly. James could only hold on and enjoy the ride. He feasted his eyes on Keith’s expression; his open mouth, his eyes squeezed shut, the pink smeared over his cheeks and nose, his thick eyebrows drawn together.

The rhythm of Keith’s hips faltered and James angled them differently. It had to be the right thing because the next time Keith grinded down, he screamed. His cunt squeezed James’ dick hard, almost painfully so. He kept hitting that spot inside until Keith became incoherent in his begging and moaning. It was beautiful, seeing him losing control so utterly.

“That’s it sweetheart, take what you need,” James panted between breaths.

Trusting Keith to be able to move without his help, he reached down to thumb at Keith’s swollen clit. He bucked with a strangled shout. The rhythm of his hips became erratic. His voice got higher in pitch until all he could do was moan like a broken thing.

His climax hit him by surprise. He let out a shuddering gasp and came with a jerk, his body going rigid. James hissed in near pain as his cunt squeezed his dick painfully.

Keith slumped over him, breathing hard, skin sweaty and hot. His pause lasted no more than a couple of seconds. He then started moving again with agonizing slowness, milking his orgasm as long as possible. The torturous pace only hastened James’ own climax. His knot swelled, caught inside Keith, and when Keith bore down one last time, he came with a back-bowing shudder.

Keith leaned forward until he could rest his forehead on James’s shoulder. James ran shaky fingers through his sweaty hair, trying to untangle it a bit. They wouldn’t be able to move until his knot deflated so the best thing to do was cuddle. He hugged Keith to him, praising him without realising it. Just like every other omega, Keith purred at the praise.

When the knot deflated, it flooded come into Keith’s cunt. He shuddered, grinding his hips a little until James hissed in pain.

Keith laughed. James’ softening dick slipped out of him, and he let himself fall beside him on the bed, looking utterly satiated. He had the air of a cat who’d just had his milk.

“We should shower now,” he mumbled tiredly.

“Wanna shower together?”

“Definitely.”

-

They went at it again the moment they woke up the next morning. James had no idea of the hour, didn’t care for anything but the beautiful man seated atop him, riding him with a magnificent wild abandon. His world narrowed down to Keith’s flushed face, to Keith’s body, to Keith’s heat squeezing him like a vice, to Keith’s burning eyes.

Afterward, they lied side by side, panting, looking up at the blank ceiling. Their sweat arms were pressed together. The blankets had been pushed off the mattress. The air smelled of their mixed scents mingled with the odours of coupling. James felt slightly dizzy with it. Every few seconds he glanced at Keith out the corner of his eye, certain he’d wake up to realise this had been a dream. Keith was there however, gorgeous in all his unabashed naked glory. Although every inch of him was beautiful, it was his eyes that drew James’ attention. He loved the haziness he read in them, the trust.

When Keith caught him staring, he grinned, a flash of white teeth in the gloom of the bedroom.

No embarrassment, no shame, only good cheer.

That unselfconscious grin stole James’ breath away. This wouldn’t be the kind of awkward morning after a bad hookup. James reached out and caressed the scar on Keith’s cheek with the back of his fingers, wanting to confirm this. No, a one-night stand wouldn’t tolerate soft morning touches. They’d already be putting their clothes on to leave. Keith didn’t look in a hurry to move. Body loose, languid on the mattress, he in fact looked ready to waste the morning away.

The front door opened. Small footsteps hurried across the living room.

James barely had time to grab the blanket and throw it over them that Sven was bursting into the room with an excited squeal. He threw himself on the bed, his knee slamming straight into James’ belly.

There came a tussle of Sven trying to get under the blanket and James trying to grab his discarded clothes without being seen naked. He hurriedly grabbed his pants, put them on at record speed, and got up just in time to see an amused Ezor leaning against the doorjamb, arms crossed over her chest and amused smile planted on her face.

All right, had he just thought this wouldn’t be an awkward morning after?

He smoothed down his hair, face burning.

On the bed, Sven had managed to snuggle under the blanket, cuddling to his father while talking excitedly in his mixed languages. James watched, transfixed, at the beautiful picture father and son offered, that depiction of uncomplicated happiness that came with sharing a bed with a beloved parent. Keith’s expression was unguarded as he watched his son snuggle to him. He’d never looked more gorgeous than at this precise instant.

“Had fun?” Ezor asked, bumping their shoulders together.

He cleared his throat, turning his attention to her. “U-uh. It seems crass to say yes somehow.”

She chuckled. “Why, if it’s the truth? I’m not asking for details, only if you had fun.” Her voice was gentle, only mildly curious.

“Yes, we had fun,” he said, because what was the point of lying?

“Good, then! I’m going back. We’ll see each other at the fair tonight, right?”

“Yeah. See you later.”

Ezor waved at him cheekily and strutted out of the room with the air of someone well-satisfied by the turn of events. James watched her go, uncertain what to say or do with himself now.

The last few hours felt like a dream under the harsh light of the morning. He knew it had all been real—hell, he simply had to look at his skin covered in scratches and love bites—yet his mind had a hard time catching up with what his eyes were showing him. He’d had sex with Keith. Holy shit, they’d fucked. And not only once—they’d barely slept, rousing each other up every few hours to go at it again. James remembered every single second of it, remembered waking up to find Keith sleeping with his head on his shoulder or Keith looking down at him with lust.

He shivered in the cool morning air.

“Is everything all right?” Keith asked from the bed.

Taking a deep breath, James turned to look at him. Sven and he snuggled beneath the blanket, looking comfortable and content. Keith’s long black hair was a tangled mass spread on the pillowcase, his eyes dark amused pools. His expression was difficult to read, a mix of amusement and fondness and something else James couldn’t place. His heart stuttered at the sight.

“Yeah, of course. I’m going to take a shower.”

“No morning kiss?”

James remained very still. His naked toes curled into the carpet in an effort to ground him. Keith was looking at him expectantly. There was a twinkle in his eye, a tiny smile curving his lips. One of his eyebrows was quirked in a challenge. James had expected the night’s events would be swept under the rug come morning. He’d expected Keith to compartmentalize so much that what had happened during the night wouldn’t affect the day hours. James had expected this, had been bracing for it. He hadn’t been bracing for _this_ , for Keith acknowledging what had happened between them, for Keith to want a continuation.

Woodenly, James marched to the bed and leaned down to kiss Keith’s mouth. Keith parted his lips immediately, one hand reaching up to tangle into his hair. James had to brace himself on either sides of his head not to be dragged down. Oh, he wanted to be dragged down, wanted to be tugged into the bed, wanted to cover Keith’s body with his and kiss him until it was time to get on with the day.

He couldn’t though, not when Sven was observing them with big eyes. James leaned back, blushing, embarrassed that a child had witnessed this. Sven didn’t look scandalized or confused; he merely looked interested. Keith had said that the Galras were far more open in their display of affection, so couples kissing had certainly become the norm in his life. Despite this, James couldn’t help being abashed without being certain why—it wasn’t as if he were put off by public displays of affection.

“You can shower now,” Keith said, waving him away. “Keep me some warm water.”

On impulse, James grabbed his hand and kissed the knuckles. “Of course.”

Keith’s reaction was the most delightful; his eyes widened and his face reddened, the blush spreading even to the tips of his ears. Gone was the imperious looks: the open, unguarded expression on his face showed only honest surprise. In his eyes, a flicker of embarrassment. He tugged his hand away with a huff, though not before his fingers squeezed James’.

He showered in a daze, replaying scenes of the past dozen hours in his mind. Having sex with Keith had been delightful, but this wasn’t what jumped to the front of his memories. It was those quiet minutes afterward where they laid together, sweaty limbs tangled, panting breaths the only audible sounds in the otherwise quiet room, when Keith had angled his body towards his, had allowed the petting hand to caress his hair. Not once had Keith muffled the sound of his own content purring.

James had no idea what this meant. He wished he knew, wished Keith and he would be mature enough to sit down and talk about it. Except they wouldn’t; what they had here had been born of the circumstances. It certainly couldn’t survive the harsh reality of their regular lives. Mizipra and its enchanting landscapes had brought them together; Captain Shirogane’s disappearance had brought them together; the mission had brought them together. Not feelings, not understanding. James couldn’t allow himself to forget that.

Except Keith had promised him a date. Not on Mizipra. Not during the mission. A date, on Earth, after they’d succeeded in bringing back the captain.

Had this been someone else, James might have feared the person was either joking or risked going back on their word. Not Keith, however. Keith didn’t have a dishonest bone in his body. He wasn’t cruel, he wouldn’t string James along.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We look good together,” Keith commented after they’d stepped away. He bumped their shoulders. “You should show this to your ex. Maybe he’ll leave you alone afterward.”
> 
> “That’s petty.”
> 
> Keith shrugged, rearranging his hold on a sleeping Sven. “It’s petty of him to text you after months of silence.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note I'll be dumping the rest of the chapters tonight. None of them are reread or corrected.
> 
> **Mentions of miscarriage in this chapter >/b>**

They spent the day pondering what they would find at the fair. They’d tried scouting the place beforehand, but the fairgrounds had been corded off. A few Miziprans working about the place had made it known that visitors wouldn’t be welcomed until the official opening later that night.

It had at least given them a chance to look at the size of the thing; it was pretty impressive. Situated half an hour out of the compound grounds, it was accessible either by foot by following a well-travelled road or by using one of the small, self-driving carts. For Sven’s sake they’d chosen to ride one of the carts, which had crawled agonizingly slowly towards their destination. Seated side by side on the narrow bench, James and Keith had been pressed close, and there had been no awkwardness in it. Sven, on Keith’s lap, had looked at the passing countryside with excitement, pointing at interesting things and asking about a million of questions to which neither adult had an answer.

The fairgrounds were quite large. From what they’d spied, the fair seemed like the regular thing they were used to; different types of rides, lots of food vendors, chance games, ability games, all of it with a sufficiently alien twist to remind them they weren’t on Earth. Around the grounds was mostly empty countryside of blueish thick grass. There were other well-traveled paths, which indicated this was a spot tourists liked to amble around. Captain Shirogane had mentioned picnicking near the fairgrounds, but he hadn’t been precise enough for Keith and James to find where exactly.

There was nothing remotely shady anywhere in the vicinity. James wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting, really; some large creepy-looking building perhaps where the kidnapped people would be hidden? Yet there was nothing. How did the Miziprans take the kidnapped people away from the fair? From what he’d seen so far, they had no vehicles other than those small carts. It occurred to him that they actually knew very little about this species. All they knew had been gleaned from what was showed at the compound.

“It’s so peaceful,” Keith sighed, plopping down on his back in the blue grass.

“And you hate it?” James teased.

Keith rolled his eyes. “I’m not some chaotic force of evil who thrives on action and noise all the time, Griffin. No, peaceful is nice, sometimes. I bet there hadn’t been much peace on Earth since the invasion.”

James shrugged. “Living on Garrison grounds isn’t very peaceful, that’s for sure. Everywhere else there are construction sites. I mean, if you go to the middle of the desert it’s probably tranquil. In cities however, it’s way too noisy.”

“I thought you liked noise.”

“Not particularly. I mean, my favourite place in the world was my aunt’s house by the beach when I was a kid. There was the sounds of waves lapping and the cries of seagulls and the occasional motorboat passing by, but it wasn’t the same thing.”

“I like peace.” Keith looked at the dark sky for a moment, his eyes full of memories. “I liked my shack in the desert. At night, there wasn’t a sound unless you knew to listen for it.” At James’ scoff of doubt, he added: “Coyotes in the distance. Burrowing animals. The occasional snake. The wind in the sand. Distant thunder. Seriously, it’s rarely one hundred percent silent in the desert.”

There was a wistful note to Keith’s voice that James hadn’t expected. He’d thought the other man content to leave Earth behind, that he hadn’t been missing anything. It was a stupid thing to think; Keith had had a life before his dad died, possibly a good one.

“Sounds lonely,” James said.

Keith shrugged. “No.”

“After you got booted from the Garrison, you were alone,” James said tentatively.

 Before answering, Keith glanced around to make sure Sven was within shouting distance. The boy had wandered away a little, chasing some flying insect and he now seemed engrossed in his observation of a pretty flower.

“I wasn’t alone,” Keith said, flashing him a grin. “I had Adam.”

“Lieutenant Wagner?”

“Hmpf, he was never that to me. At first he was nothing more than Shiro’s boyfriend, then he was my friend, and then he was my big brother.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“Few people did. Everybody thought I hated him, and I guess I did at first. But Adam was too nice for me to hate. He always took care of me to the best of his abilities. I never got cold or hungry thanks to him. After it was rumoured that Shiro had died during the Kerberos mission, I clung to him quite embarrassingly.” Keith scoffed. “I suppose he clung to me too after a fashion. He excused me to the teachers, made sure I didn’t get scolded too hard for getting into fights. When I had a miscarriage after I heard the news that Shiro had died, he—”

“What?!”

As if suddenly realising what he was saying, Keith’s eyes widened. He sat up, looking embarrassed. He glanced at Sven again, presumably to avoid James’ gaze.

“I’m sorry,” James said hurriedly. “I shouldn’t—it’s just, I was surprised. I’m sorry.”

“It wasn’t Shiro’s this time,” Keith said, turning to him with a half-smile. “I had fooled around with another cadet. The rubber broke. I was a mess after the Garrison lost contact with Kerberos. I guess my body grew too weak for a kid or something. Anyway, I lost it after I heard the news. Apparently, shock can do that. I went to Adam with blood in my pants and I swear I never saw him so close to fainting in horror. Anyway.” Keith sighed.

“I’m sorry,” James said again, lamely. What else was there to say? “I’m glad you weren’t alone.”

“Yeah. I just wish Adam were still alive, you know? He was a good guy.”

“He’d be proud of you.”

Keith scoffed as he got up. “No way. He’d box my ears for having been foolish enough to be seduced by Shiro. Come on, let’s go back. I want Sven to nap before that fair.”

-

Sven napped, and Keith and James fell into bed too for a different reason.

Much later, they met up with Assmiya whose task was to escort them to the fair. The Mizipran appeared in a good mood, the colour of their skin bright. They hadn’t been assigned a new mate at the moment so they were alone in guiding their charges to the fairgrounds.

Although the Miziprans glided over the ground instead of walking, James could tell there was a spring to Assmiya’s step. The promise that they would leave their planet with their beloved to live on Earth apparently made them impossibly happy. Their joyful smell was cloying, leaving James reeling a little.

“Do you have a plan to find your friends?” Assmiya asked once they were alone in their small cart.

“More or less,” Keith admitted. “We will reconnoitre the fair and decide what to do from there. Do you have any new information?”

Assmiya shook their head. “I’m afraid I do not. I tried asking discreetly, but I was told not to meddle in things that don’t concern me.”

“Don’t get yourself into trouble,” James said. “You’re our only ally here. We cannot afford to lose you.”

Assmiya’s four eyes gleamed as if in mirth. “I promise to be very careful. You have to promise to be careful too, however. The fair has something to do with the disappearances.”

Keith leaned forward a little. “Yes, speaking of this. How could a Mizipran take Shiro? You’ve seen him, he’s a big, strong guy. He’s fought Galras twice his size. No offense but you don’t look like the type of folks who could take him down.”

Assmiya considered the question. “It is true that we do not possess much physical strength. We have never really needed it. Every time heavy lifting has to be done, we kindly ask one of our guests. If I recall correctly, Mr. Shirogane and his mate did help mend a fence that had been broken at the farm.”

“Do you have any special abilities? Like mind-control or something?”

Ten years ago, James would have looked at Keith in puzzlement at this question. Now, mind-controlling aliens and the likes had become the norm. Every alien species had different abilities, some impressive, others odd.

“No, I’m afraid not. A long, long time ago, our planet belonged to another planet named Kaax'oits. Our overlords indeed had mind-controlling powers, but I’m afraid none of these were passed on to us.”

“How about poisoning?” Keith insisted.

“Well, I’ve never heard of anything of the sort. It is possible that some of our local plants might be poisonous to other species. I apologize, I wish I could help you more.”

Keith heaved a sigh. “It’s fine. I guess you wouldn’t know if you aren’t in on the secret.”

He sounded slightly disappointed as he sat back properly, cradling Sven in his arms. James reached out to pat his knee, uncertain how to express his compassion or whether it would be welcomed. Assmiya looked uncertain, awkward, young. They were a gentle, naïve person, James knew, someone who had never known war or deception or betrayal. They were dismayed that their people could abuse the trust of guests and hurt to have been made a part of it unknowingly.

“It’ll be all right,” James said, uncertain whether he actually believed it or not.

The mood improved marginally when they reached the fair. From a distance, they could hear the sounds of revelry. Laughter and music and cheers reverberated in the cool evening air. Sven perked up immediately, his eyes going huge as he stared at the colourful displays gradually growing closer.

The small cart deposited them at the front gate. A small crowd was milling about, waiting to be allowed entrance. Every couple seemed to be accompanied by their allotted Mizipran. James and Keith followed Assmiya, the three of them keeping close. There was a general sense of happiness and good cheer. Out of reflex, James reached out to grab Keith’s wrist, touching the sensitive skin there that he knew would make him relax. Keith took a step closer, his free hand resting on Sven’s shoulder to make sure the boy didn’t bolt.

The admission took only a few seconds. Assmiya took them through the gate after giving their name to a couple of gatekeepers, older Miziprans by the look of them. They were waved through without being given a second glance.

Once on the fairgrounds, it took James a few seconds to get over his amazement. It all looked so… earthly that his brain overlooked the more obvious signs that they were on a foreign planet. The sights, the smells, the sounds, it all reminded him of the fairs of his youth that he had visited with his siblings and his cousins. If he looked around, he could almost imagine one of them peeking at him from behind a wooden structure or a stand, daring him to try this ride or this weird-looking food.

He could tell similar thoughts were running through Keith’s mind. His expression had gone soft, his eyes warm. Surely he was remembering those summer evenings with his father. James took hold of his hand again, squeezing it gently. Keith squeezed back distractedly, a reassuring gesture.

Of a common accord, they slowly made their way deeper into the fair. Well-defined paths took them from one attraction to the next. There were maps depicting the rides, games, and food stalls, though none of them made much sense. With all that shouting and exuberant joy surrounding them, it was difficult to remember they were here on a mission. James looked around himself at all those unsuspecting people, a chill running down his back. Would one of them be snatched away today? Would a family lose a member without ever finding out what had happened?

Most of the rides, even those for children, looked outlandish. They stopped by one of them to watch in disbelief the twists and turns those small carts did on the rails. James was a pilot, motion sickness and the likes had never bothered him, but his stomach did flip at the speed the carts travelled. Sven asked if he could ride this and even Keith was amazed at his son’s bravery.

They, of course, didn’t let the boy try the ride.

For about an hour, they walked the fairgrounds, seeing what could be seen. James didn’t spot anything out of place. Everybody looked to be having the time of their life, except perhaps for those who’d eaten too much or had been too brave in the choosing of a ride. They kept their eyes opened when they visited the food vendors’ district, trying to see if a cook was lacing the food they were giving to a customer. Nobody looked to be getting sick or woozy, and the smells of so much food was making James hungry. He had no idea of what was being served, only that it looked delicious. The Miziprans had the equivalent of cotton candy, and Keith looked at the small stall with longing when they passed by.

Once, their path crossed that of Ezor and Zethrid. They nodded at each other without further acknowledgement. Ezor looked to be having a great time if the sway in her step meant anything. Zethrid appeared to be alert, her eyes searching her surroundings. They didn’t talk.

“We should at least try one ride,” Keith was saying. “It might look suspicious if we don’t.”

“How about this one?” James offered with mounting amusement.

He pointed, and Keith rolled his eyes at the sight. “What! No! It’s ridiculous!”

“Your stomach won’t stand it?”

“James! It’s a boat ride, I’ve had worse! It’s for mushy couples! I bet there’s some romantic music in the tunnels and the seats would probably be heart-shaped if we were on Earth…!”

James tried not to laugh at Keith’s indignation while he towed him after him. The tunnel of love-like ride was crowded by other waiting couples giggling amongst themselves. It seemed to be a sort of boat ride where a small boat glided serenely through tunnels. James didn’t know whether there would be romantic music, but it seemed the perfect, quiet place to sit down and discuss what they would do next.

Which is what he wanted to do, of course.

Keith looked embarrassed for some reason.

“Last time I did something like this was on Clear Day with Hunk. I warn you, James, that time I escaped with my bayard.”

James snorted. “I bet you broke poor Hunk’s heart.”

It took about ten minutes before they were finally allowed to step onto a platform and then onto a sort of small punt with benches. James gallantly helped a seething Keith in before handing him Sven. The sooner had he stepped in that the small river currents tugged their punt away from the platform and into the first tunnel. The colours were muted here too, soft. There was little illumination meaning that they could barely see each other.

“There doesn’t seem to be anything out of place here,” James said once the noises of the fair had diminished.

Keith sighed. “I know. I suggest we walk the grounds one last time. Sven is getting tired.”

“Do you want to go home with him? I could stay and keep an eye out.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. What if you get taken too?”

Did Keith care or was he simply being practical? James didn’t know, didn’t want to linger on that question.

“I doubt this would happen, but I get your meaning.”

“No offense, but if Shiro can get kidnapped, so can you.”

James scoffed. “The captain didn’t know to be on his guard. It’s fine anyway, let’s stay together. It’s safer.”

The mushy colours were probably supposed to be romantic. James guessed that, had they’d been on Earth, there would have been a lot of pinks and reds and heart-shaped objects and music. For some reason, the half-darkness and the silence here facilitated rapprochements. James had to resist the urge to reach out to grab Keith’s hand or to pull him close. Glancing out the corner of his eye at the other, he saw that Keith’s was looking away from him at the weird displays of colours and forms on the banks of the rivulet. On his lap, Sven was nodding off, eyelids drooping and thumb popped into his mouth. The excitement of the fair was tiring him out.

On impulse, James intertwined his fingers with Keith’s on the seat between them. He pretended to be engrossed in the passing landscape, not wanting to see Keith’s annoyed expression. Every second he expected him to pull away. He didn’t. Their hands remained connected, a small point of warmth. James ran his thumb lightly on the palm of Keith’s hand. It seemed as if every one of his nerves converged where their skin touched. He became acutely aware of everything that had to do with the other man: the sound of his breathing, the warmth of his body, the smells of campfire and desert sand. There, at this moment, simply holding hands during a stupid boat ride, this intimacy appeared deeper than anything they had shared in bed.

“James.”

He turned, and Keith leaned closer to kiss him. The gesture was natural, unaffected. James didn’t freeze, didn’t take the time to contemplate that unexpected turn of event. He cupped the back of Keith’s neck, pulling him in, opening his mouth to the kiss. There was little heat to it, nothing that would set his blood to boiling. It seemed like he had all the time in the world to taste Keith’s lips, explore his mouth, relish the taste of him.

And then there was a flash and suddenly the noises of the fair crashed upon them.

Neither jerked back. They parted slowly, eyes opening to gaze at the other’s face. Keith looked a little flushed. His lips were red and wet and, as James watched, he ran his tongue over them. The gesture coupled with the gleam in his eyes promised more kisses, more coming together of their bodies.

As it turned out, the flash had been from a photograph. The second they exited the punt, an alien of odd physiognomy came to them, brandishing a picture under their nose and asking if they wanted to buy it. The alien had a booth of similar photographs on which couples could be seen kissing or doing the equivalent of their species.

James was a little embarrassed. He took the picture—he honestly had no intention of buying it. Except that the second he laid eyes upon it, he knew he had to. Holy shit did Keith and he make a good-looking couple, especially with Sven sleeping soundly on his father’s lap. They were kissing on the photo. Their expression was tender, open. Nothing looked forced. They looked like a real couple exchanging a kiss.

There was a challenge in Keith’s eyes. He wanted to see what James would do.

“I’ll take it,” he told the photographer, never once gazing away from Keith.

The photographer transferred the picture to his phone and he kept the physical copy folded and tucked into the back pocket of his pants.

“We look good together,” Keith commented after they’d stepped away. He bumped their shoulders. “You should show this to your ex. Maybe he’ll leave you alone afterward.”

“That’s petty.”

Keith shrugged, rearranging his hold on a sleeping Sven. “It’s petty of him to text you after months of silence.”

James said nothing, thinking. Should he do it? A part of him relished the thought of hurting Alex, of tearing his heart into shreds the way his own heart had been destroyed. He didn’t think he would do it; he was no longer a cruel person. And anyway, it wasn’t as if Keith and he were officially together either.

They slowly retraced their steps around the fairgrounds, trying to catch sight of anything nefarious happening that they might have missed the first time around. The excitement and good cheers ran as high as before. Nobody appeared distressed. Hell, there wasn’t even any dark corners from where an unsuspecting guest could be snatched.

They found themselves back amongst the arcade and games of ability. There seemed to be a lot of fun going on. Couples challenged each other. Good-natured dares were issued. Plush toys and all kinds of objects were being won and exchanged hands.

Looking around, James was reminded of Clear Day all those years ago. He’d given Ryan the plush when his son was born. The plush had become a sort of joke between them, a proof that their friendship had thrived even in wartime. It had seemed fitting that James would give it to him once he became a father.

The loud noises woke Sven. The boy looked grumpy and annoyed by the excitement. He hid his face into Keith’s neck, grumbling, not quite ready to throw a tantrum yet. They’d have to go back soon to put him to bed. Once again, James couldn’t help thinking how short-sighted of Commander Iverson it had been to force Keith to bring his son. A boy of three was an encumbrance, after all.

They spotted the tall forms of Zethrid and Ezor in the distance. Going nearer, James saw that Zethrid had been hailed by a stallholder. None of the stallholder was Miziprans, and this one looked like a mix between a Galra and an Altean, creepily human-like except for their colouring. And their four arms. They beckoned Zethrid, saying something that had the woman turned all of her attention to them.

Keith and James exchanged a glance before closing the distance to see what was happening. The stallholder was praising Zethrid’s height and the breadth of her shoulders, asking to touch the bulging muscles of her arms. She preened under the attention, flexing for them willingly. There were a few other beefy aliens around the stall, all of them vying for attention.

“A strength contest!” the stallholder was chanting. “Come test your strength against the strongest!”

“I’m the strongest!” one alien bellowed.

“Ah!” Ezor retorted, patting Zethrid’s arm. “You’ve got nothing on her! Show him, baby!”

Even Sven looked interested by what was happening. He looked on with wide eyes as Zethrid stepped closer to the other aliens arrayed in a neat line. Onlookers watched, murmuring amongst themselves.

The strength contest consisted in punching a machine as hard as possible. The machine then calculated the strength of the person. It all seemed pretty basic, so the contestants lined up eagerly. Unsurprisingly, they all reeked of alpha pride. Their mates stood by, simpering, none of them cheering as loudly as Ezor. James found himself amused by the whole display and he did cheer when it was Zethrid’s turn to hit the machine.

Once all dozen contestants had had their turn, the stallholder scribbled their results on a pad. Everybody waited with bated breath for the name of the winner to be revealed.

Then, with a dramatic flourish, the stallholder turned and handed the pad to Zethrid.

“We have a winner! This amazing alpha has scored highest of them all, and by a margin of tweedy points!”

Ezor started clapping and shouting immediately while the other contestants grumbled in disappointment. Zethrid flexed for her mate and for the clapping crowd, grinning in pride. The onlookers cheered her on. Sven, all tiredness forgotten, grinned and pointed at Zethrid—he probably would have gone to her if Keith had put him down.

The stallholder made a show of clapping too. “There we go, our champion of incommensurable strength! Please, accept this humble crown to celebrate your victory!”

They produced a sort of weird-looking circlet that they deposited on top of Zethrid’s head after she’d bowed at the waist. After she’d straightened, she raised her arms in the air, drinking in the applause and basking in the love.

Grinning, amused, James snapped a few pictures with his phone. It was nice seeing Zethrid beaming that way. It was such a change from the murderous woman who’d tried killing Keith five years ago.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was an odd note in her voice. “What is it?” James asked.
> 
> “Nothing! It’s just… I seem to recall her getting up in the middle of the night, but I don’t remember her coming back to bed. And her side was cold when I woke up.”
> 
> James and Keith exchanged a look. Keith said: “Are you saying she has been gone for half the night? It’s not like her.”

“All those pictures are blurry,” Keith complained.

They were in the small cart that would bring them back to the compound. Keith had demanded to see the pictures James had taken, so he’d exchanged Sven for the phone. Sven had once again fallen asleep after congratulating his _tata_ Zethrid. He slept slumped on James’, his face pushed into his chest. He was totally lax, a warm bundle in his arms.

“I’m not good at taking pictures,” James answered with a roll of his eyes. “There’s got to be at least one that’s good.”

“Hm. This one isn’t so bad.”

He angled the phone’s screen towards him. James saw a picture of a triumphant-looking Zethrid wearing her circlet with Ezor at her side. The photograph was okay, the kind of okay that would make Ryan cringe.

“If I keep looking,” Keith said distractedly, scrolling right and left, “will I stumble upon a few dick pics?”

“No, of course not. What am I, fifteen? It’s my work phone, anyway. Do you really think someone from the IT would appreciate it?”

Keith chuckled. “They’ve probably seen worse.”

They reached their destination and hopped off the cart that circled around a hut before going on its merry way. The sky hadn’t changed so it felt as if they’d left for the fair only a handful of minutes ago. James found it disconcerting how there was absolutely no way to tell the passage of time. Assmiya had told him that the Miziprans had ways of telling the time, but he hadn’t understood when they’d explained.

“You can put Sven to bed,” Keith declared, throwing himself on the couch once they’d reached their hut. “All that noise and all those people have tired me out.”

James snorted, knowing Keith was being dramatic on purpose. He put Sven to bed carefully, removing his shoes and pulling the blankets up to his chin. The boy barely stirred, only turning away with a low mumble. James patted his hair, heart bursting with stupid love for a kid that wasn’t his. Damn it, how was he supposed to bear saying goodbye to Sven after all that? He’d become so fond of the kid.

“That was a waste of our bloody time,” Keith grumbled once James rejoined him in the living room. He moved his feet to give James room to sit on the couch before plopping them back down on his lap. “Are you sure we didn’t see anything compromising?”

James rested his hand on Keith’s ankle, thinking. “We saw weird things, but I’m not so sure about compromising things. It all seemed pretty tame to me.”

“Ugh, to me too,” Keith groaned, running his hands through his hair. “I’m good at what I do. If I say I didn’t see anything weird, then there was nothing weird happening.”

“Maybe Zethrid and Ezor will have better luck. They’re still there after all. They said they’d remain until closing time.”

“Yeah, let’s hope so. I don’t want to have to start asking questions to other Miziprans.” He sat up. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

-

The next morning, Ezor walked in without knocking. James and Keith looked up from their breakfast while Sven ran to her excitedly, asking to be picked up.

She obliged him, looking around with a smile. “Wow, Zethrid’s already here? We didn’t see anything so I didn’t think she’d be in such a hurry to talk to you guys.”

Keith frowned. “Zethrid? We haven’t seen her since yesterday.”

“Oh. She wasn’t in bed this morning. I thought she’d come over.”

There was an odd note in her voice. “What is it?” James asked.

“Nothing! It’s just… I seem to recall her getting up in the middle of the night, but I don’t remember her coming back to bed. And her side was cold when I woke up.”

James and Keith exchanged a look. Keith said: “Are you saying she has been gone for half the night? It’s not like her.”

“I know,” Ezor heaved a sigh and sat on the couch, putting Sven down at her feet. “I’m probably worrying over nothing. She seemed tired after the fair.”

“I didn’t know Zethrid could be tired,” James commented, trying for humour.

“It takes a lot to tire her out, that’s true. She was kind of… listless? She barely talked, like all her energy was gone.”

“Did she eat something at the fair?” Keith asked.

“No, nothing at all. Just like you, she didn’t want to risk it.”

“All right. Why don’t you start from the beginning?”

Ezor slumped further into the couch, stretching her long legs in front of her. Her face creased into a frown as she recounted last night’s events: “We arrived the fair not long before you. We looked around. We didn’t eat anything. It was pretty fun actually! Then that stallholder hailed Zethrid and made her compete, the way you saw it. After you left, we wandered the fairgrounds again until closing time. Nobody accosted us. Nobody really talked to us, only nodding in passing. Then we left. By then Zethrid was getting listless and unresponsive. I’ve never seen her like this before. Her smell was all over the place before…” she trailed off, wrinkling her nose in thought. “Before it became… flat. You know our scents are affected by our emotions, right? It was like she wasn’t feeling anything at all. Even in her sleep it doesn’t get this bad…”

Her voice trailed off. Her blue eyes looked haunted. It seemed she hadn’t considered all of this in such depth before speaking it out loud.

Glancing at Keith, James saw that he also looked perturbed. They both knew Zethrid much better than he did, yet even he could tell this didn’t feel like her to go listless. And a person’s scent going flat was a rare thing, usually involving a medical condition such as a coma or, more commonly, deep depression. Zethrid had obviously not been in a coma since she’d gotten out of her bed, and deep depression would have been felt much sooner, especially by how attuned to her Ezor was.

“Afterwards, we just went to bed. She didn’t seem interested in cuddling so we just fell asleep. As I said, I think I recall her getting up in the middle of the night, which is something else that she usually never does. Zethrid sleeps like the dead. I don’t recall her ever needing to get up to pee,” Ezor finished.

The food James had been eating suddenly tasted like ash in his mouth. He put his fork down, disconcerted by Ezor’s tale. One glance at Keith’s worried face told him he was uneasy about the whole thing too.

No matter how he raked his brain however, James couldn’t see what might have affected Zethrid. She hadn’t eaten anything at the fair which meant poisoning was unlikely.

“I’ll go make a circuit of the compound,” Ezor said, getting to her feet.

“Ezor,” Keith barked, stopping her.

The chill authority in his voice froze Ezor. She turned to look at him, a challenge in her face.

“Don’t do anything stupid, Ezor,” Keith continued, gentling his voice. “We will find Zethrid, don’t worry, but you _cannot_ blow our cover. If you do, she might be lost forever.”

A silent battle of will ensued. The two of them glared at each other. James was seeing Keith in his full leader of the Blade of Marmora mode and Ezor in her mercenary mode. Both were fearsome. Even Sven looked slightly uncertain, looking between his father and his unlikely auntie.

“You’re one damn bossy omega,” Ezor said, deflating. “And I thought only Lotor was like that. Very well, I promise I won’t wring any neck _yet_.”

“Thank you.”

She marched out of the hut, her shoulders hunched in both annoyance and determination. No doubt no stone would be left unturned in her search for her mate.

Keith said nothing, his face not reflecting his thoughts. Absent-mindedly, he kept eating, his spoon never once faltering.

“Something’s bothering me,” he said, like James hadn’t noticed. “Give me your phone, I want to look at the pictures you took yesterday.”

James handed him his phone without comment, watching as he scrolled through the bad photographs he’d taken yesterday. While Keith wasn’t looking, Sven stole a piece of cake from the food flatter and shoved it into his mouth, cheeks going huge. When he noticed James’ disapproving frown, he only smiled charmingly.

“Sven,” Keith said, not once looking up from the phone, “you know I have eyes behind my head. And you know that if you eat cake right now, you won’t have any for dinner nor for supper.”

Sven looked defiant for a moment, chewing the cake while glaring at Keith. “I didn’t do nothing.”

“Next time you think of lying, wipe your face before you do.” Keith angled the phone’s screen towards James. “Look, that picture. There’s something about it…”

James observed the photo, trying to see what Keith saw. It was a picture of Zethrid after she’d won. She was wearing the circlet. Because she’d turned, the shot showed only the back of her head. The circlet extended lower at the back than at the front, cupping the back of her skull nearly to the top of her spine. Two small pieces of white alloy jutted out, looking almost like an insect’s antenna. Though of weird design, James saw nothing wrong with it. The same went for everything else in the picture. Nothing appeared to be out of place.

“I’ve seen that thing before,” Keith commented. “Send the picture to Pidge, Hunk, and Lance. Maybe they’ll remember.”

James did so.

Nobody contacted them for next hour. Keith fretted, going to the window to stare, afraid that Ezor would actually wring the neck of some poor Mizipran. Ezor was cruel or mean, but she was intense and there had clearly been anger in her eyes when she’d marched out of the hut. James understood; just like he’d be seething if his mate were taken and all he could do was wait. Was this how Keith was feeling about Captain Shirogane’s disappearance? Honestly, James had expected him to jump on the first Mizipran he encountered and shake them until they spilled the truth. He’d been surprisingly self-restrained so far.

His patience was ebbing, however, especially now that they had another mysterious disappearance on their hands that had happened under their nose. Zethrid hadn’t vanished from the fair; she’d gotten out of bed of her own volition. They didn’t even know if this was linked to what had happened to the captain. James understood Keith’s frustrations; he was getting more and more mystified too.

When Keith’s phone rang, they both jumped. He scrambled to answer the video call, the image projected on the holoscreen of the wall. Lance Álvarez’ face appeared. There was a bit of static due to the great distance between Mizipra and New Altea but soon, the feed stabilised enough.

The first thing James noted was how grim Álvarez looked. The seriousness transformed him so much that he barely recognized him at first. It was the first time he was seeing him this way. Even during the invasion, Álvarez had had the ability to make a joke out of anything.

“ _Hey, Keith, Griffin,_ ” Álvarez greeted. “ _I just received the photo you sent me._ ”

“Judging by your face, you know what this is,” Keith said gloomily.

“ _Yeah. Remember that time when we went to another reality, not long after Shiro had disappeared?_ ”

Keith nodded. “Of course. We met this man, Sven, and those Alteans.”

“ _Exactly. I was with Pidge and Hunk and we talked to this guy. They had a big bloke with them who was from some warring tribe. The Altean guy told us the Alteans had found a way to bring everlasting peace to their universe by subduing the will of dissidents. To do so, they used the_ hoktril _. Look._ ”

Álvarez’ face disappeared to be replaced by the image of some device. James and Keith gasped at the same time: although sporting some differences, this thing indeed looked like the circlet Zethrid had been wearing at the fair.

“Are you saying that Zethrid was given a device that comes from Altea? From the Altea of a different timeline?” James asked, flabbergasted.

Álvarez sighed. “ _That’s what I’m thinking. When Allura scarified herself to save the multiverse, Altea was reborn again. According to Coran however, a few things were different. He thinks that stuff from different timelines and different universes got scrambled. Deep inside a vault of Castle Altea, we found the_ hoktril _. Many copies of it. We didn’t destroy them. We used them as an example that things could have ended up differently if Allura had been a different person._ ” Álvarez paused, turning an apologetic gaze to Keith. “ _There was a break-in about three months ago. The_ hoktril _disappeared. We didn’t mention it to the Coalition because we thought it’d be better to deal with this ourselves. At about that time, a few ambassadors from Mizipra were on New Altea to sign treaties and learn from us. We gave them many of our old computers and other such stuff to help them modernize their planet. We didn’t notice the_ hoktril _went missing long after they’d gone. Honestly, nobody would have suspected the Miziprans until you told me you were investigating Shiro’s disappearance._ ”

James sat back, trying to make sense of this. According to Álvarez’ suspicions, the hoktril, a device that could subdue will, had been stolen by the Miziprans ambassadors from New Altea’s vaults.

“That’s why you couldn’t come with me,” Keith said with annoyance. “You were dealing with this.”

Álvarez offered him a half-grin. “ _Yeah, sorry, bro. I accepted to take care of New Altea for Allura. If I’d known the two problems were linked, I’d have told you._ ”

“Ugh, never mind that. It would make sense that such a device would be used on Zethrid and Shiro. By subduing their will, anybody could make them do anything. It’s kind of… brilliant.”

“ _It’s the kind of thing Emperor Zarkon would think of,”_ Álvarez said wryly. “ _The Miziprans aren’t as nice as they appear to be. Be careful._ ”

“Aww, you’re worried about me?”

“ _Just don’t want to lose my rival!_ ”

They exchanged amused smile, like this was the kind of banter that happened all the time. James didn’t prickle with jealousy; he shared more than banter with Keith. Álvarez was only a friend while he was more.

“Is there a way to track this hoktril?” James asked.

“ _I don’t know. Coran and Pidge and your friend Leif are working on it. They’ll find a way, don’t worry._ ” Álvarez scratched his head. The blue Altean marks on his cheeks glimmered softly. “ _I guess I’ll have to apologize to Shiro after this_.”

“Don’t worry, he won’t be angry at you,” Keith assured with a dismissing wave of his hand. “How many hoktril were stolen?”

“ _Hm, about twenty. Keith, when you find Shiro and remove that thing from him, he might be confused for a while. It’ll take time before the effects wear off._ ”

Keith’s jaw tightened. “I’m getting so sick of this. Why can’t the universe leave that guy alone? He was fucking happy on Earth. He was safe!”

“ _Hey, it’s fine, Keith. He’ll be all right._ ” Álvarez glanced at James. “ _Won’t he?_ ”

“Uh, yeah, I’m sure the captain will be fine,” James said, patting Keith’s shoulder. “He’s not alone. He has Lieutenant Miller with him.”

“Yeah, I guess… Anyway, thanks, Lance. Keep in touch.”

“ _Sure will._ ” A puzzled expression suddenly crossed Álvarez’ face. “ _Keith, you look different. Did something happen?_ ”

Keith scowled. “Different how?”

Álvarez narrowed his eyes. “ _I don’t know, I can’t tell. You just do. You look pretty—_ ”

James couldn’t stop himself from snarling: “What?!”

Álvarez looked at him. Looked at an annoyed Keith. Looked at him again. Then a slow, knowing smile spread on his face. “ _Uh, so that’s how it is. Very well, I’ll leave you to it. Don’t forget to keep me in the loop, both of you._ ”

And the call was ended.

“What the hell was that about?” Keith asked, puzzled.

James wasn’t sure what this had been about; all he knew was that a rival alpha had called _his_ omega pretty. “I’m not sure,” he lied, playing dumb. “What was Álvarez talking about? Who was this man named like your son?”

Keith picked Sven up, plopping him on his knee and combing his fingers through his hair. He looked uncertain as he said: “With Voltron, we found a comet made of the ore that had been used to build the Lions. That ore allows ships to slip from one reality to the next. We crossed to an alternative timeline where Altea had long ago defeated the Galra Empire. In fact, they were the bad guys of that reality, supressing their enemies and anyone who thought differently by taming them with this hoktril. There was a group there called the Guns of Gamara, the equivalent of the Blade. One of its members was a man named Sven.” Keith looked slightly embarrassed. “He looked so much like Shiro that I mistook him for him the first time. Afterward, Lance joked that Sven had looked both like me and Shiro, like he was our son or something. I guess it stuck in my mind.”

Sven was looking at his father in puzzlement after hearing his name. “Dada?”

“It’s okay, baby,” Keith soothed. “Anyway. We now know how the Miziprans managed to overpower Shiro and Zethrid. All that’s left is to figure out where they are kept and rescue them.”

“ _How_ do we rescue them? I mean, what if the Miziprans use those who are under the hoktril’s power to fight us?”

Keith shrugged. “I doubt all of them will be good fighters like Shiro and Zethrid.”

“What about Lieutenant Miller? Do you think he’s being kept under that thing’s power too?”

“I don’t know. I suppose so. We’ll see when we get there. I just hope he won’t have been harmed or Shiro will be pissed.”

“I hope not either; Lieutenant Miller is a good person. He doesn’t deserve to be hurt.” James raised an eyebrow. “Unless you think so.”

Keith scoffed, looking insulted. “Look, Curtis and I might not be on the best of terms, that doesn’t mean I want him to be hurt or to die. He makes Shiro happy and I’ve realised that it’s all that matters now.”

James didn’t know what to say. There was an unhappy twist to Keith’s lips. Sven, sensing the tension, asked to be let down. Once on his own two feet, he left the living room to watch cartoons in his bedroom.

After a moment’s hesitation, James inched closer to Keith and dared rest a hand on his shoulder. The muscles beneath his fingers were bunched tight before relaxing by degrees.

Keith hang his head, sighing. “I hate that we scented each other because I can almost _hear_ your thoughts,” he grumbled. He leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest. “Look, I was maybe jealous of Curtis at the beginning, okay? I saw how Shiro looked at him. I saw how they were getting closer. After we fought Sendak, after I woke up from the hospital, I confessed to Shiro.” Keith’s face coloured. “I’d nearly died and I was afraid and I confessed.

“Damn it, I have the worst timing ever. We were both mourning Adam’s death and Shiro had just been made captain and there was no time for feelings. I think he panicked a little. After I admitted it all to him, he just said he was sorry. He left by hospital room and we barely talked to each other after that. Things were so awkward between us. I felt like I had ruined our friendship. We missed each other. I think that’s why he turned to Curtis at first. He wanted a friend, and poor Shiro’s so blind when it comes to that kind of things that he never saw that Curtis was already head over heels for him. They were never officially a couple. From what I heard through the grape vine, they were like… friends with benefits.

“I don’t think Shiro was ready for a relationship so soon after he’d heard of Adam’s death.” Keith chuckled humourlessly. “When we’d learned we were going back to Earth, he told me that he was looking forward to seeing Adam again and perhaps make things right between them. Anyway. Then that thing happened on New Altea where we fucked.” Keith’s eyes were hazy, soft. “I was certain it would change everything. But it didn’t. We went back to our respective lives afterwards. Shiro never contacted me. I heard through Lance that he was going steady with Curtis. I found out I was pregnant. Somehow, I never found the time to tell him.”

Theirs was such a classic tale of bad timing and horrible communication. James didn’t say it out loud, but he thought that Keith never truly had a chance with the captain. Captain Shirogane loved Keith without ever being in love with him. That time on New Altea had probably been a huge mistake to him, which was why he hadn’t tried contacting Keith afterwards. It had certainly never crossed his mind that a child could be conceived that night.

“Will you tell him about Sven once we find him?” James asked.

The question was as selfish as it was selfless. He wanted Keith for himself, wanted to have a chance at a relationship with him. On the other hand, he thought Sven deserved to know who his real father was. Technically speaking, Captain Shirogane had done nothing wrong. Knowing him, if he’d learned he’d fathered a child, he’d have done anything in his power to help in their raising.

“I think I will,” Keith said after a moment. “I think he deserves to know. And I want Sven to know his other father. I mean, he could learn so much from Shiro.” He offered a weak grin. “The same way I learned so much from him. I doubt Curtis will object. He’s… he’s not a bad guy.”

“No, he’s not,” James approved softly. “I promise to you that Lieutenant Miller is one of the best persons I know. You don’t have to worry on that account. And I think you should tell the captain about Sven.”

“I will.”


	19. Chapter 19

Ezor had just come back from her angry stomping around the compound when Ina contacted them. Her face appeared on the holoscreen while behind her Holt and Hunk were seen fiddling with something.

Ina didn’t smile. Her lips twitched upwards the tiniest bit, the best greeting she could manage for her lieutenant.

“How do we find them?!” Ezor asked of her, pushing James and Keith aside to be nearest the screen.

Ina’s eyebrow twitched. “ _Good afternoon, Ezor. Lieutenant, I am right now sending to your phone the algorithm we came up with to locate the small wavelengths the hoktril emits. With this, you should be able to pinpoint the captain’s location within one metre. I would have preferred something more precise, but I’m afraid Mister Álvarez was quite adamant that time is of the essence._ ”

Poor Ina, worried that they wouldn’t find a big guy like Captain Shirogane within a radius of one metre.

James smiled. “I believe we can work with that, Ina. Thank you very much.”

“That’s great, Leif,” Keith said honestly. “Thanks for your hard work. Do you think you could show us on a map where Shiro and Zethrid might be?”

Ina typed on a keyboard and a map of the compound appeared.

James felt no great surprise when he saw the glowing dot just beside the forest they’d visited. If he weren’t mistaken, this was exactly on the other side of the wall Keith had tried to peer above a few days before.

“ _According to my calculations, this is where Captain Shirogane is held. Zethrid should be within walking distance of him. I want to issue a warning however; we’ve pinpointed the location of many hoktrils. Although there doesn’t seem to have others anywhere else, it isn’t certain that the captain and Zethrid will be there. I’d suggest you proceed with caution._ ”

“Will do, Ina. Thanks.”

She nodded and the feed went dark.

“Come on!” Ezor exclaimed, her eyes fierce. “Let’s find them!”

Keith signed. “Ezor, you know we can’t simply rush. We have to be smart about this. We have no idea how heavily guarded the area is. When I saw it, there seemed to be guards, but I only got a glimpse.”

Ezor’s lips thinned in displeasure. “Between you and me, boss, I’m quite sure we can take down any stupid guard.”

“Perhaps, but I don’t want to risk it. We have no idea what they’ll do to the prisoners if we attack. Lance told me that the people under the hoktril’s influence will be woozy once we remove it. We have to take into consideration that they might not even be able to walk.” Keith’s eyes narrowed. “Can you carry Zethrid on your back and fight at the same time?”

Ezor’s orangey skin turned crimson as she tried to repress her rage. Something like hatred flashed in her blue eyes before she regained control of herself. She took in a deep breath that she let out in one long exhalation.

“I could, but that wouldn’t be optimal,” she admitted. “I understand your point, boss.”

Keith smiled. “Very well. We have been in tight spots before, so let’s not despair just yet. There are three of us. We can pull this off if we work smart and if we work together.”

Ezor and James nodded at his words.

James kept expecting to be annoyed at Keith for taking the lead. A week ago he’d been pissed that Keith was calling the shots. He had to admit, if only to himself, that it still rankled a little bit. Nevertheless, he was willing to hear Keith out.

“What we know so far is that those under the influence of the hoktril are kept behind that wall we saw in the forest. While we were there, we didn’t see any gate or anything else that would give us entry. I’d say we scout the wall—”

“No,” James cut Keith off. “This place is well-guarded, you said so yourself. We cannot be seen scouting the wall. There’s something we have to take into consideration; Ezor is still here. When Captain Shirogane was taken, so was Lieutenant Miller. We have to consider the possibility that people are taken with their mate. They got Zethrid, so it’s possible they will try to get Ezor next. If we dawdle too much, we might lose her too.”

“Are you suggesting something rash?” Keith asked, a small smile pulling at his lips.

“I’m saying that we have a narrow window of time in which to act. Zethrid’s disappearance is so recent that, had we not known about the previous disappearances, we’d probably have shrugged it off as her wanting some time alone. The Miziprans responsible for this surely don’t expect a fuss to be raised about her disappearance right away. I say we act now.”

Ezor and Keith looked at him with huge eyes. James held their gaze while the half-formed plan in his mind struggled to take form. They didn’t need anything too elaborate. They had to be bold, fast, and get out of here quickly. Speed was part of the Blade’s MO. He could tell Keith approved of this even if he did his best to think things through.

“Do you have something in mind?”

Keith was looking at him, straight at him. There was respect in his eyes, a willingness to listen in his posture that was new. They were back into their respective role of leaders. James was reminded of the way they’d behaved towards each other during the invasion, yet with more trust.

“Fly in, pick our missing people up, and be on our way. Simple as that.”

Ezor laughed. “ _Fly_ in, literally?”

James nodded. “Yes. Keith’s ship is perfect for this kind of mission. We fly out, get a read out on the place, and jump in. We snatch Shirogane, Miller, and Zethrid, and we go on our merry way. Mizipra has no military, no gun, no ship, nothing to stop us. I suppose the thugs they keep at hand will have clubs or this kind of thing, but it’s nothing we can’t handle.”

Keith kept quiet, thinking this through. “Makes sense. We might have to abandon Zethrid’s ship for the moment, but we could demand it be given back once we’re safe on Earth. The Miziprans won’t be happy, but we can let Commander Iverson deal with the fallout afterwards. Hell, if they do have Shiro, if he can bring proof that the Miziprans kidnap people, it could be enough to boot the planet out of the Coalition.”

“Yes. I—”

“You’ll pilot the ship while Ezor and I fetch Shiro, Curtis, and Zethrid.”

James narrowed his eyes. “Why can’t Ezor do it?”

“James, you’re the second best pilot after me. Don’t you think you’d be more useful piloting the ship and whisk us away at a moment’s notice?”

“I don’t like the idea of you going in there alone.”

Keith shrugged. “I won’t be alone, Ezor will be with me. No offense, but she’s been guarding my back for five years. We fight well side by side.”

And, at the end of the day, this was it. James was a great pilot and Ezor was a great fighter. Keith was right, even if it annoyed James. He didn’t like the thought of Keith being in danger, yet Ezor would probably be better at protecting him than James could. It sucked. His pride smarted. Keith looked at him coolly until that fiery disappointment burned itself out. James had to be realistic; now wasn’t the time to let his feelings or his ego get the best of him. Keith had laid out their tasks perfectly, playing on their talents.

“Very well.”

“Oh, this is exciting!” Ezor said, clapping her hands. “Finally, some action!”

“We don’t kill anyone,” Keith warned, “we only render them unconscious, Ezor. Now, let’s get to work. James, you need to find Assmiya and Assilsa. We promised we’d take them to Earth and now is the time. I’ll pack our stuff up and get Sven—” He faltered, cheeks going pale. “I shouldn’t have listened to Iverson. I shouldn’t have brought Sven…”

“Keith, it’s going to be fine. I’ll take care of him, okay?” James assured. “He’ll be safe with me on the ship.”

Keith went to him and grabbed him by the front of his shirt. To James’ astonishment, there seemed to be a yellow tinge to his eyes. “If we’re wrong and they have guns or canons or whatever,” Keith hissed into his face, “if they fire on my ship or whatever, you get the fuck out of here, Griffin. You don’t take any chances. You get my son out of here. Understood?”

James stared, paralyzed by the intensity in Keith’s gaze. He looked fierce and ready to tear him apart of he didn’t agree.

Gently, James disentangled Keith’s fingers from his shirt, holding his hands in a gentle grip. “I promise. I’ll keep Sven safe. Trust me.”

Keith relaxed by slow degrees. He leaned back a little, eyes looking normal. “I do, I trust you,” he murmured, sounding a tiny bit awed. “I trust you with Sven.”

Ignoring Ezor, ignoring the world, ignoring that time was of the essence, James leaned in to kiss Keith. He expected Keith to pull back or to turn his head away. Instead, he answered the kiss with a desperation that startled James. His arms went around his neck to pull him closer and James wrapped his own arms around Keith’s waist. For a brief moment, there was nothing but the press of those soft lips against his own, the feel of that sweet waist under his hands, that familiar warmth next to his.

When he pulled back, James saw that Keith’s eyes were half-closed, his cheeks pink, his mouth a bit wet. He wanted to kiss him again, wanted to drag him to their bedroom, wanted to make love to him and tell him of his feelings.

He stepped back calmly instead, his hands lingering a little. Keith blinked, looking like a well-sated cat waking up from a good nap.

“I’ll meet you at the ship in one hour,” James said in a low voice. He turned to go, but some instinct stopped him. He looked back at Keith, looked directly at him. “I love you.”

And he left.

-

It took him nearly half an hour to find Assilsa. The Mizipran was busy welcoming a new group of tourists with the person that was apparently their new mate. There was no enthusiasm to their voice as they talked to the newcomers, no passion. There was an awkwardness between the two Miziprans that James had never seen before. Clearly, whatever was between them was very new.

James stood aside, trying to catch Assilsa’s eyes without being too conspicuous. When the Mizipran finally saw him, they excused themselves and glided towards him. In the couple of seconds it took for them to be side by side, James saw a transformation occur in them. Their colours looked better, their eyes brighter. They knew what he would say.

“We’re leaving in half an hour,” James murmured. “You need to find Assmiya and meet us at the ship. There was no end date to our sojourn, so I’m guessing nobody will ask questions?”

Assilsa’s body rippled with excitement. “No. I know where Assmiya is right now. I’ll process your departure so we can go quickly, which I suspect is the point.” They paused. “What about your missing friends?”

“We know they are behind that wall. Do you know if they are well-guarded? Mizipra doesn’t have an army or canons or anything of the sort, doesn’t it?”

The shift in Assilsa’s posture indicated surprise. “No, no, we are not a violent people. We abhor violence and weapons.” They sighed. “As for what’s beyond that wall, I cannot know for certain. I have heard rumours, of course, but nothing concrete. We hire… I believe the right word would be _mercenary_ to do certain jobs. Although the only hired help I’ve seen are those working the booths and stalls of the fair, I suspect some might be used to guard _things_. Or people. I don’t believe they’d be well-armed.”

“Hmpf, hired thugs, sounds fun. Very well. I’ll see you in thirty minutes.”

Assilsa nodded and drifted away. James watched them go, hoping they’d find their mate quickly so they’d be on their way. Heart hammering, he went through the information centre and out the other door unto the tarmac where the ships of the guests were all parked. People mingled about, all of different species. There were vessels coming and going in the sky above. The traffic would help them slip away unnoticed.

He found Keith’s ship easily. He opened the door and stepped inside, hoping nobody around would notice his stiffness. Unlike the first time, he had no time to marvel at the Galran engineering. He sat in the pilot’s seat and turned the whole thing on. Screens and gauges came alive. Galra words flashed that held no meaning for him. Everything looked to be in order. He turned on the proximity alerts before giving the rest of the cabin a quick onceover. Nothing appeared to be out of place. Everything was as they had left it.

Standing by the pilot’s seat, he cringed at the space. Two adults and one kid had made it appear narrow. How would it feel with six more people? There’d be room to sleep or even lie down. It was a two-day ride back to Earth. James knew he could stay awake that long if necessary and he supposed Keith could too. Captain Shirogane, Lieutenant Miller, and Zethrid shouldn’t be counted on; there was no telling how they’d be after the hoktril was removed from them. As for Assmiya and Assilsa, neither of them had left their planet before so they certainly wouldn’t know how to pilot.

The proximity alert beeped. He turned to look at the screen and saw that Keith was approaching with Sven in his arms. Ezor was nowhere to be seen.

And then she was beside him, making him jump.

“What the heck?!”

She grinned at him, slouching against the co-pilot’s seat easily. “You didn’t know? I can teleport over short distances. The boss didn’t want me to be seen boarding the ship.”

“Makes sense. The Miziprans cannot know you’re onto something.”

A minute later Keith was boarding too, a confused Sven tucked in his arms. He’d brought back their two traveling bags that he stored calmly in the storage compartment alongside Ezor’s. Once it was done, he strapped Sven into his seat securely, combing his hair away from his face and telling him to be a good boy. There was no fear in Sven’s eyes, only mild confusion. He instinctively trusted Keith to keep him safe.

James remembered his quiet confession. Had it been only an hour? It felt like much longer. When their eyes met, nothing in Keith’s gaze gave him any clue about his own thoughts or feelings. He was in his leader mode; serious, focused, grim. James spotted the slight bulge under his jacket where he’d hidden his Marmora blade, invisible to anyone not looking for it. He’d geared up sensibly for someone about to see action and had braided his hair to keep it away from his face. He looked fierce, and James fell all the more for him because of this.

Through the screen, they spotted Assmiya and Assilsa making their way towards the ship. They weren’t walking together, both keeping a respectable distance from the other. Assilsa blended easily in the crowd, talking to this one person or that one, looking for all the one like a host welcoming new comers. There was more visible tension in Assmiya’s posture. Although they didn’t look graceful as they usually did, they didn’t attract any unwanted attention.

They were soon aboard the ship. For a moment, they all stood together there, looking at each other. Tension was cranked up a notch. Excitement mingled with apprehension in a miasma thick enough to be tasted. Throughout their mixing scents, James picked up Keith’s the easiest. Keith was looking serious, ready, lethal. There was also apprehension coupled with expectation in his scent. Something else too that James couldn’t identify, something faint enough to nearly go undetected.

He’d ponder that later.

He sat in the pilot’s seat. He took a second to let this sink in: he was a pilot again. A surge of fierce joy ran through his body. He felt like himself in a way he hadn’t in years. His breathing calmed. He went through the familiar motions of flicking switches, checking gauges, setting alarms. His body knew what to do. His feelings, everything that wasn’t needed right now receded to the back of his mind. He was in control.

The ship rose smoothly through the air. The ground receded. Behind him, crowding behind his seat to look outside, he heard Assilsa’s and Assmiya’s gasps of surprise and delight. Keith stood beside him, one hand on the backrest of the seat. He didn’t talk, didn’t try backseat driving.

Before the others had arrived, he’d entered the coordinates of the location of the hoktril. A map of the planet appeared on one side of the large screen, guiding him. The second he angled the ship in this direction, everybody on the ground would know something was afoot. They counted on speed and surprise to get their work done before anyone had time to react.

James took a breath and floored it.


	20. Chapter 20

After his first mission, James had been asked to report back. Lieutenant Wagner had been his superior officer and, although they had both had enjoyed a good professional relationship, James had been terrified to report to him. He’d stood in front of his desk, exhausted, shivering, the sweat under his suit cooling. He hadn’t been able to report. He hadn’t been able to recall one single detail of the mission. His brain had shut down the second his jet had left the runway. He’d been aghast, disgusted at himself. He’d nearly wept in shame.

Until he’d been told it was normal. The adrenaline coursing through his body during his mission had obliterated everything that wasn’t necessary. Lieutenant Wagner had explained that it happened to a lot of recruits, that it was nothing to be ashamed of. The memories would come back in time, and they had. James had been able to write his report in a manner good and concise enough to satisfy even a demanding teacher like the lieutenant. After the first mission, he had been able to remember more and more easily. He’d been able to get over his body’s natural defense mechanism to protect him from the unpleasantness happening.

Nowadays, after a mission, he was able to recall everything in the tiniest detail, so much that Commander Iverson had once joked that no, the colour of the sky really wasn’t important enough to be included in a report.

James was sure that, should he live to be one hundred, he’d remember this moment into every detail. He’d remember the feel of the controls in his steady hands. He’d remember the comfort of the pilot seat, the exact shades of the purple backlights of the dash, the scents filling the cabin. He’d remember the ground receding under them and the exact moment his heart had kicked up a notch when he’d angled the ship towards the right direction.

Only three of them were professionals and it showed; James, Keith, and Ezor kept quiet while Assmiya and Assilsa talked in low excited whispers. Keith had given Sven his cellphone to play with, but James knew the boy had picked up the nervous vide and was looking around himself with uncertainty. He made a mental note to make sure the kid was all right while they waited.

It took less than a minute to reach their destination. Beneath them the blue grass stopped abruptly to be replaced by tall coniferous trees. The huts and people walking the grounds of the compound were tiny, far enough and inconsequential enough that they could be in another galaxy.

An alarm beeped, announcing that they were being hailed. James muted it. They wouldn’t lie, they had no time for it.

He spotted the wall Keith and he had stumbled upon during their hike. Once over it, the trees gave way to arable lands. Those stretched as far as the eye could see. The crops were of every colour of the rainbow. Seen from above, it appeared as if they were looking at a giant weaved carpet.

They all inhaled in surprise at this, even James. Mizipra was the breadbasket of the Coalition and he was seeing how this was possible. He had never seen so many acres of farmland producing such a huge diversity of produces.

Using one of the outside cameras, he zoomed in on one of the fields. Amongst the tall crops were a bunch of workers harvesting. None of them were Mizipran. All of them wore the hoktril tight around their forehead. There was a certain languor to their gestures, like automaton programmed to do the same movements over and over again.

“They’re all big, strong guys,” Ezor commented, breathless. “They tested our strength to see who was strong enough to be sent working the fields.”

It made sense. James felt sick to his stomach at the thought. Those poor, mindless workers were nothing more than slaves. Since their will had been suppressed, they couldn’t rebel, couldn’t protest, wouldn’t fight back if mistreated.

In the midst of the workers were a bunch of other aliens who looked to be far more self-aware. They showed no sign of being under the influence of the hoktril. They didn’t seem to have weapons on their person. The ship had a weapon scan and it didn’t pick any guns, canons, or anything of the sort.

“They could still have clubs and swords,” Keith warned, leaning closer to look at the scanner. A smirk appeared at the corner of his mouth. “Our cup of tea, Ezor.”

There was a small shack at the top of one field around which the hired thugs seemed to mill.

Keith pointed at it. “There. Their boss must work from there. They’ll know where to find Shiro and the others.”

James circled around the shack in a narrow arc to lower the ship towards the ground. The noise of the engines alerted those below; they all looked up at the same time, eyes going huge, pointing.

Once the ship was perhaps six feet from the ground, Keith punched the button that opened the door.

He grinned recklessly at James. “Keep her steady. We’ll be back in a jiffy.”

And he jumped out, Ezor following closely with a loud laugh.

“Are they going alone?!” Assmiya demanded, the colours nearly all fled from their body in fright. “They can’t possibly go through all those people!”

“Believe me,” James said, keeping the ship just out of reach of the thugs on the ground, “they can and they will.” He looked over his shoulder. “Sven, look at me, poppet.” Sven looked up from the phone he’d been clutching, lips quivering. “Daddy is going to be back in a few minutes. You okay?”

The boy nodded after an uncertain pause. “I’m okay.” He kept looking between Assmiya and Assilsa, not quite frightened but certainly curious.

“You’re very brave,” James assured him with a smile.

And he was. James wasn’t certain that many three-year-olds would be taking this so stoically. Keith clearly took him on missions, clearly gave him a taste of the real world.

James turned his attention back to the screen, trying to see what was happening. Pandemonium had erupted. Though he couldn’t hear, he imagined easily orders being barked and shouts resounding. Keith had stormed the shack while Ezor guarded the door. Nobody was outright fighting just yet. There was too much confusion, and those thugs were used to dealing with mindless, harmless folk. They had no idea how to react to two persons attacking them while a ship hovered over them.

He saw that more thugs were running in from the fields, ready to investigate. There had to be nearly forty of them, enough to swarm Ezor and Keith and take them down easily. Throwing caution to the wind, he pivoted the ship until the front canon faced the running thugs. He turned it on, knowing it would glow a threatening purple colour. As he had expected, the thugs screeched to a halt, eyes going wide. Whatever species they were from clearly had known of the Galras because they were smart enough to stay a good distance away.

Returning his attention to the shack, James saw someone being thrown out the window to sprawl on the dark earth. Keith was on them in an instant, hauling them to their feet. In his left hand his blade shone an eerie violet. He didn’t have to press it to the thug’s neck; they were nodding vigorously and pointing in a direction. Keith shook them a few more times, but their answer didn’t change.

Already, Ezor was bolting in that direction, almost too fast to be followed with the naked eye. Keith pushed the informer away and ran after her.

James felt like he was watching a movie. Nobody tried to stop Ezor’s and Keith’s progress. Everybody threw themselves out of their way. Ezor never once took out her weapon and Keith sheathed his dagger while he ran. Soon, they disappeared inside the tall crops, their passage marked only by an undulation.

“We lost visual contact,” James grumbled.

He looked at the timer they’d set; it had already been five minutes since their departure. He saw that they had been hailed at least three more times. He kept the frequency closed. The thugs on the ground were picking themselves up, bickering amongst themselves. One returned inside the shack, and the ship’s radar picked a hailing frequency being opened. James didn’t know if it could be scrambled so he let it happen; at this point he doubted the Miziprans could do much.

The only ones not running around like headless chickens were those poor people under the hoktril’s influence. They continued their work, harvesting food, putting the crops into basket. Watching them work unhurriedly, mechanically, was both serene-like and chilling. Even from a distance, it felt as if they had no personality whatsoever, like they were simply empty flesh. Many different species were down there, usually about two of them. He’d been right in his assumptions that the Miziprans tried to grab mates. He didn’t know why Ezor had escaped her mate’s fate and he wasn’t certain he wished to find out.

There was no sign of Keith or Ezor anywhere now. James refused to fret—he’d been on missions with Keith after Sendak had been defeated; he knew the man could hold his own. Still, his heart hammered inside his chest. There was the taste of bile at the back of his throat. He’d forgotten this, that fright for the man he loved. It had nearly choked him that time on that volcano planet when Keith had fought Zethrid.

And to think they were trying to save her now.

“How long are we supposed to wait?” Assilsa asked.

James glanced at the timer. “We have ten more minutes.”

“And afterwards?”

“We leave.”

A stunned silence. “Would you really be able to leave your mate here?” they asked, flabbergasted.

James refused to look at them. He wanted to say that no, he couldn’t, wouldn’t leave Keith. He wanted to say that he’d go after Keith if he didn’t come back after the allotted time. But he couldn’t lie. It would break his heart, it would kill his soul, but he’d promised. Twice already he’d promised Keith to put Sven’s wellbeing before that of his father.

Although the locals weren’t hostile, the thugs didn’t seem to know what to do, there was no telling it would remain so. As far as James could tell, no disturbance of the sort had happened before. The Miziprans made sure that their slaves were too mindless to try escaping. He doubted a rescue mission had ever been tried, which was why they were caught off-guard. There was no saying what would happen once they rallied. Surely the Miziprans wouldn’t want this exposed to the rest of the Coalition. Slavery was forbidden on every planet. There would be retribution. What price would they be willing to pay to stop this from reaching unsympathetic ears?

James realised with a jolt that there was something he could do in case they were captured. He opened a hailing frequency back to Earth, using the Garrison’s emergency one. Statistic filled the line. It didn’t connect. Swearing under his breath, he tried another frequency. Again the line refused to be connected. Were their connection being scrambled?

Taking out his phone, he saw that this too wouldn’t connect. Either by sheer bad luck or on purpose, communications were broken.

“Shit,” he grumbled.

He returned his attention to the screen after having glanced at Sven to make sure he was all right. Nothing seemed to be happening in the fields except for the thugs seemingly conferring. Their hailing frequency was still opened. James surveyed the horizon, wondering if an enemy ship would appear—it was empty. The skies were still that reddish-purplish colour unveiled by clouds. Since the sun was so low, long shadows were thrown, leaving broad swathes in darkness. Suddenly, the once serene appearance of the planet chilled him to the bone. There was something sinister in the alien colouring, in the tall wall looming over the fields. He couldn’t wait to be out of here, to go back to Earth where there was a definite distinction between night and day.

For nearly five minutes, he had no visual contact on either Ezor or Keith. He refused to worry. They still had plenty of time. It would be all right. They knew what they were doing. Keith was excellent at what he was doing and he wouldn’t stop at anything to save Captain Shirogane. James hoped he found the captain in good health or the thugs were in for a rude awakening.

“Oh, is that them?” Assmiya asked excitedly, pointing.

James’ heart missed a beat. Bursting through the crops were Keith and Ezor, not quite running, not quite walking.

And with them were their three missing people.

James sat back, boneless with relief. He could hardly believe how easy—

“What is that on the horizon?” Assmiya asked.

The fear in their voice made James look up sharply. For a second, he had no idea what he was seeing. Fields extended for a long distance, a patchwork of vibrant hues across which an ink blotch seemed to be spilling. He blinked. Zooming in on this, he saw the encroaching darkness was ships. Many ships. The scanner counted fifty of them of mixed origins. James had been around alien ships long enough to realise those were old, probably given to Mizipra the same way old computers had been. He wasn’t sure whether they were warships however and he didn’t want to stick around long enough to find out.

He looked at Keith and the others. Keith was dragging Shirogane by the arm and the captain looked woozy, hardly able to stand on his own two feet. The same went for Zethrid and Lieutenant Miller. They walked slowly, limbs loose, eyes unfocused. They looked like a bunch who’d just woken up. Keith and Ezor pushed and prodded at them, hurrying them along with difficulty.

“Fuck.”

James landed the ship in a hurry and, discarding Keith’s instructions, jumped out of the pilot’s seat and rushed out to help them.

He seized Lieutenant Miller’s arm, tugging at him.

“What are you doing?!” Keith barked.

“Enemy ships approaching. Gotta hurry things along.”

They had no time to talk. Between the three of them, they managed to get their people up on the ship. James silently apologized to the lieutenant and the captain for more or less handling them like sacks of flour. They unceremoniously piled Shirogane, Miller, and Zethrid on the floor, and James rushed back into the pilot’s seat.

The enemy ships were getting closer. The thugs were rallying, apparently comforted by the sight of reinforcement. One of them tried climbing on board but Ezor kicked them out with such force that they went rolling across the ground in an untidy heap.

It hardly took ten seconds for their ship to be airborne, but already the enemy armada was boring down on them. James turned the ship around. He had no intention of fighting; fleeing was the smartest solution at the moment.

Keith threw himself into the co-pilot’s chair, looking grim and windblown.

“Get us out of here,” he hissed at James.

It looked as if they would make it out of Mizipra’s atmosphere unmolested when something crashed against the hull of the ship. Shouts of dismay rang inside the cabin while James looked around wildly, trying to see what had hit them. Most of the enemy ships had abandoned the chase except for five following closely on their tail.

“No breech,” Keith said, eyes roaming the readouts and dials on the screen. “Raising shield.”

A shield of faint purplish light enveloped their craft. They barely felt the next hit.

“Do we fight them?” James asked.

A part of himself wished Keith would say yes. The other part, the logical one who thought of all the passengers unable to buckle themselves up and of Sven, hoped Keith would say no.

Keith looked at the screen that showed their pursuers. “No, don’t fight them. Those aren’t deep-space vessels. They won’t follow us for long.”

“Very well.”

Although they kept being fired at, no hit did any damage. The old ships were nothing compared to modern Galran technology. Soon, just as Keith had predicted, they grew discouraged and turned tail. By then they were well away from Mizipra, the shape of the planet only the vaguest, tiniest pinkish dot against the black backdrop of the universe.

The second the ships were out of range, Keith got out of his seat. James thought he’d go to Captain Shirogane but, instead, he knelt in front of his wide-eyed son to talk to him. Although there were wet tracks on Sven’s chubby cheeks, he hadn’t once burst into terrified tears.

“Is space travel always this… eventful?” Assilsa asked, a note of wonder in their voice.

James chuckled and looked at them. “No, I assure you. The Voltron Coalition keeps the trading routes safe. We’re safe here.” He hesitated. “Who did these ships belong to?”

“I don’t know. Perhaps they belonged to those thugs surveying the fields?”

“Perhaps.” James heaved a sigh. “Commander Iverson is going to blow a gasket when he hears about this. Militarized planets have to be registered as such and Mizipra isn’t on that list last I looked.”

Which reminded him that he should contact the commander to tell him they were on their way. He’d do it in a minute, after he made sure everybody was all right.

Manoeuvering around the cabin was a nightmare. He got out of his seat and had no idea what to think of the spectacle taking place. The ship had four seats; the pilot’s, the co-pilot’s, the one occupied by Sven, and a free one. The space between those seats was right now occupied by the three they’d saved; Zethrid, Captain Shirogane, and Lieutenant Miller sprawled more or less senseless on the floor. The three of them sported the same vacant, dazed look. Their limbs were flung every which way, their body slack.

James knelt beside Lieutenant Miller. He took his wrist in his hand, measuring his pulse. It was a bit slow but steady. His half-closed eyes were glassy. The skin of his face felt slightly hot to the touch. There was a deep gash over his forehead that had healed badly, presumably where the circlet masquerading as the hoktril had dug hard into his flesh. He was pale and unkempt, his brown hair tangled, stains on his clothes and dirt beneath his fingernails.

Beside him, Captain Shirogane didn’t look much better. He was also dirty and battered with bruises on his face. His clothes had tears in them. Since he’d apparently been going barefoot, there were cuts the soles of his feet. His skin also felt slightly too hot to the touch, like he was running a low fever. James wondered if this was due to infection settling in his blood or due to the hoktril’s influence.

Of the three of them, Zethrid looked the best. Already she was looking more alert, more lucid. With Ezor’s help, she was able to sit up and take a sip of water. Her eyes were still hazy however and she had to lean heavily on her mate.

Keith and he tended to the minor wounds of the lieutenant and the captain. James glanced at Keith once in a while, noticing how careful and tender he was being with Captain Shirogane.

“Is Curtis going to be okay?” Keith asked once they were done.

“I believe so. They’re bruised and scraped, but it’s nothing life-threatening.”

“Good. That’s good.”

They let Ezor to sit on the floor beside Zethrid and returned to their seats. Keith picked Sven up, sitting him on his knee. Sven looked pale and tired. He cuddled gratefully into his father’s embrace, his head on his chest. In a matter of minutes he was asleep. Keith carded his fingers through his son’s hair distractedly, reassuring him.

“You okay?” James asked in a low voice.

“Yeah.” There was nothing in his scent indicating that he wasn’t. “Just glad this is over, I suppose.”

“So am I.” He glanced at Assilsa and Assmiya who were trying to take as little space as possible, standing in one corner. “The ride back home’s going to be crowded.”

“We’ll have to make do.” Keith touched a screen on the dashboard. “I thought I told you to go if there was danger.”

James sighed. Ah, yes, this. “I had time to give you a hand before they were upon us. I wouldn’t have endangered Sven, you know that.”

Keith didn’t look angry. He offered a tiny smile. “I know. You’ve been very nice to him since this began. I’m grateful.”

“I had absolutely no reason not to be nice to a kid.”

“He’s not yours.”

James kept quiet, trying to understand what Keith meant by this. Was this a warning to back off now that the mission was over? Was this merely a statement? Was this a question? Did Keith wonder why James took care of a child not his own, something that few alphas were willing to do?

“I wouldn’t mind if he were mine.”

He let the words fall between them. It was silent inside the cabin except for the gentle whoosh of the airflow. He had confessed to Keith earlier today, why not admit this too? This was truth; he wouldn’t mind Sven being his kid. He wouldn’t mind raising him, wouldn’t mind calling him son, introducing him to his parents.

He thought about this. How would his parents react if he introduced Keith to them? Keith was the embodiment of all they detested; a successful, wilful, prideful, unapologetic omega. He was a leader, a warrior, and the best pilot of his generation. He had one-night stands and he was happy to raise his son on his own. James’ parents wouldn’t see what he saw in him. They wouldn’t see his courage and his fortitude, his intelligence, his kindness, his odd sense of humour, his weird little quirks, the love with which he raised his son, the friendliness he could show, the loyalty, the burning fire in his soul that made him so attractive.

It would be a disaster.

Keith sank lower into his seat, cradling Sven while propping his feet up on the console. For a long moment, he stared out at the vast expanse of space. The purple backlights highlighted his high cheekbones.

Quietly, slowly, he reached across the space separating their seats and grabbed James’ hand. He squeezed his fingers hard once, the gesture conveying more than words could say.

Perhaps, it said, perhaps.


	21. Chapter 21

James was startled out of his reverie when Keith rushed out of his seat, giving him a sleeping Sven. He turned to see what was going on.

The effects of the hoktril seemed to be wearing off in Captain Shirogane. His body had tensed and he was tossing and turning, mumbling under his breath. Keith knelt beside him, touching his shoulder, trying to soothe him.

“Curtis—” the captain kept mumbling, his hands reaching blindly.

“Curtis’ fine,” Keith assured. “Shiro, he’s fine, don’t fuss.”

Captain Shirogane’s eyes fluttered opened. The haziness slowly receded. He looked to be waking after a long restless night. He blinked several times. His hand went to his face, rubbing at the stubble on his cheeks and chin.

He looked around himself. “Keith?” he mumbled. “What—Keith?”

Keith smiled. Sliding an arm under the captain’s shoulders, he helped him sit up. “Hey there, sleepyhead. Don’t move too much, you’re still weak.”

Shirogane looked even more confused. He touched his head as if it pained him, wincing when his fingers brushed the bruises on his face. When he spotted his mate on the floor beside him, he disentangled himself from Keith’s embrace to go to him, worry twisting his face. Lieutenant Miller appeared to be sleeping peacefully. The lines of strain had disappeared from his features. His breathing sounded even. Shirogane touched his cheek, his chest, his limbs, as if he were looking for wounds.

“What happened?” Shirogane looked around, seemingly getting more confused by the second. “Is that—Lieutenant Griffin? Ezor? Zethrid?” He turned his attention back to Keith. “What happened? What’s going on?”

“What do you remember?” Keith asked.

The captain frowned, thick white eyebrows lowering. Slowly, memories came back to him. His eyes darkened. His jaw tightened. He looked down at the lieutenant, gently combing his hair out of his face.

“Curtis wanted us to visit Mizipra,” he began in a low voice. “I didn’t understand why at first until he told me he’d picked up on a distress signal sent from there. We talked about it to Commander Iverson and he suggested we investigate it undercover. We were there for about a week and then—” He blinked. “I cannot recall. How long ago was this?”

“About a month ago,” Keith supplied helpfully. “When you stopped sending your reports to the commander, he sent us to help.”

Shirogane blinked again. The cloud of confusion had dissipated from his eyes, making him appear sharp. His look encompassed every passenger on the ship once more.

“He sent you and Lieutenant Griffin, and you brought Zethrid and Ezor,” he said. Keith nodded his confirmation. “And you saved us.” A change came over the captain’s features. He lost his severe appearance to be his genial, kind self. “Keith, saved me, again.”

Keith smiled. “As many times as it takes, Shiro. Don’t tell me you forgot?”

Unsaid words passed between the two of them. There was so much history between them and so much that needed to be fixed.

James didn’t know what to make of this. Keith seemed interested in him, but there was no denying that he’d always have feelings for Captain Shirogane nonetheless. You didn’t forget your first love, didn’t forget the person who went to such extremes to save countless times. He didn’t know what Shirogane thought of Keith, however. He was a master at hiding his thoughts and concealing his emotions. Yet there must have been something and the proof of that slept blissfully on his lap.

Lieutenant Miller woke up too not long after. Shirogane immediately tended to him, talking to him gently, helping him sitting up. Although they’d been together for a couple of years, James had very rarely seen them exchange loving touches. They were always professionals at the Garrison, content with looking at each other or smiling secretly at a private joke. It was both disconcerting and fascinating to see the usually unflappable captain get so fussy.

It was even more fascinating to see Keith’s reaction to it. James’ heart hurt for him. Keith got up the second Shirogane turned from him. He didn’t look angry, only a little wistful, like he imagined it could have been him in a different universe.

They waited until Lieutenant Miller, Captain Shirogane, and Zethrid were fully awake to recount everything that had happened.

Keith explained how Commander Iverson had called him for help and had paired him with James. He recounted their arrival on Mizipra, how they had chosen to retrace the captain’s steps in the hopes of finding clues about his disappearance. When he mentioned the wall in the middle of the forest, both the captain and the lieutenant perked up. They, too, had apparently found it though they hadn’t tried peeking over it the way Keith had. He told them how James had befriended Assmiya and Assilsa, and how their help had been invaluable in figuring out that something sinister was afoot at the fair. He showed them the apparently harmless picture James had taken of Zethrid wearing the circlet after winning the strength contest and how Álvarez had recognized the modified version of the hoktril.

“The same thing happened to us,” Lieutenant Miller said slowly. “We visited the place. The two Miziprans overlooking our stay had suggested we visit the fair, which we did. That alien at the booth invited Shiro to test his strength. Since he won, he was given the circlet.” He frowned, thinking back. “It’s as you described, Keith; after Shiro put it on, he became listless, tired. We went to bed early. He got up in the middle of the night. I asked him where he was going and, when he didn’t answer me, I followed him. I tried talking to him to no avail.” He squeezed the captain’s hand in reassurance. “We ended up in the forest where there was a gate that lead through this wall. Shiro went through easily and, the second I tried to follow, I was seized.” He rubbed his head. “I suppose they put this hoktril on me too afterwards.”

“And the person who sent that distress signal, did you find them?” James asked.

The lieutenant shook his head. “No. I searched for them in vain. They were probably caught.” He looked worried. “Once we’re back on Earth, I believe it’d be best if we sent a delegation back to Mizipra to shed light on this. It’s very disturbing.”

“Agreed,” Keith said with a nod. “And if Iverson doesn’t want to do anything, the Blade will get involved. No way in hell I’m letting this kind of bullshit go on. I understand the Miziprans need labourers to tend to their fields, but stealing people isn’t the way to go.”

“I’m quite certain the commander will want to intervene. I’ll make sure of it,” Captain Shirogane promised. He got up. “I believe we should contact him. Do you mind if I use your comms, Keith?”

Keith shrugged and waved towards the console. “Be my guest.” His eyes widened when the captain took a wobbly step towards the console. “And sit down, Shiro! Jeez! Don’t push yourself! Here!” He helped the captain to sit in the co-pilot’s seat.

Shirogane chuckled and offered a wan smile. “Sorry.” He winked at James who still sat in the pilot’s seat. “Better listen to him if…” he trailed off when he spotted Sven asleep on James’ lap. “Why, who’s this?”

“My son,” Keith said.

His voice sounded loud in the silent cabin of the ship. Sven slept on. Assilsa and Assmiya looked on, quiet, not knowing what was happening but sensing this was important. Ezor winced in sympathy.

Saying his heart didn’t want to hammer out of his chest would be a lie. James feared it would wake Sven up. He couldn’t look away from Shirogane’s face as those two words sank in. His eyebrows climbed high in surprise. His eyes widened. His mouth formed a little ‘o’. He reached out, one big finger gently touching Sven’s cheek.

James nearly growled at him. It took all of his willpower to keep the sound locked in his throat. It almost choked him.

“Congratulations,” the captain said honestly, smiling. “How old is he? What’s his name?”

Keith didn’t want to answer. He looked ill at ease, a first. He knew that Shirogane would guess who Sven’s other father was with this information. Yet not answering the innocent questions would look suspicious.

“He’s named Sven. He’s three.”

That truth sank in. The smile on Captain Shirogane’s lips wilted. His face paled. He stared up at Keith in growing disbelief. Hurt and betrayal clearly shone in his eyes. Once again he looked at Sven, _really_ looked at him. He was probably taking in the hair colour, the shape of the eyes, the angle of his jaw, trying to see himself in this child. In his child.

Mercifully, Lieutenant Miller didn’t see the undercurrent of hurt. He had no idea of what had happened on New Altea between his fiancé and Keith so he couldn’t know who Sven’s other father was. He leaned closer to get a look at Sven, smiling softly in the way every adult did at the sight of a cute kid.

“What a cute boy,” he cooed. “Congratulations, Keith. You are very lucky.”

“Thank you,” Keith answered automatically.

He was still locked in a staring contest with Shirogane. He was pale and an odd emotion shone in his eyes. His shoulders were hunched. He looked… terrified, guilty.  

James suddenly wanted to throw Shirogane out the airlock. He gritted his teeth, once again suppressing the urge to growl.

Instead, he said curtly: “Keith, why don’t you bring some water and something to eat to them? I’m sure they’d welcome it.”

Unthinkingly, he’d used his alpha voice. Keith shivered visibly. At any other times, he’d have resisted it. Now, James suspected he welcomed the distraction. He turned to rummage in the storage store for those rations he kept there. The lieutenant offered to help and soon, it was only James and Shirogane.

“Don’t talk to him that way,” Shirogane said evenly.

Normally, James would have backed down. Shirogane was a commanding officer, an older man he admired. He didn’t this time, not after he’d seen the guilt in Keith’s eyes.

“Don’t,” James replied, keeping his voice low. “Captain, please. Don’t make things difficult for him. He’ll talk to you in due time.”

Keith was right; the captain was a soft alpha. He was certainly the only alpha James knew who wouldn’t fly into a rage after learning an omega they’d bedded had birthed a child without telling them. The hurt in Shirogane’s eyes went deeper than such petty anger. He looked like someone had cut him to his core. Keith would have a lot of explaining to do, and this was something James could never help him with.

“I believe you wished to contact Commander Iverson, captain,” James prompted.

It took Shirogane a couple of seconds before he rallied. Ruthlessly the pain was hidden, buried. His mask reasserted itself. He was once again Captain Takashi Shirogane of the Voltron Coalition.

James opened a communication channel directly with Commander Iverson at the Garrison. Now that they were far from Mizipra, the call connected easily. Both James and Shirogane sat up straighter when the face of their commander appeared on the screen in all its grimness.

To James’ utter surprise, the commander grinned hugely. “Shiro!” he said, breaking protocol. “You really cannot be killed.”

Shirogane laughed, rubbing the back of his head. “Commander, I believe that only sheer luck keeps me alive.” He saluted, once again serious. “Commander Iverson, Captain Shirogane reporting.”

-

“You okay?” James asked Keith later in a low voice.

Keith was leaning against the backrest of the co-pilot’s seat, watching as the others sat on the floor in the circle while Sven told them a story. The boy had decided it was story time and he’d taken it upon himself to recount his perilous space adventures. The adults, even the Miziprans, listened on, going _ooh_ and _aah_ with overblown enthusiasm. Sven had been a bit shy around Shirogane and Miller at first but, as always, he’d overcome it easily after a few minutes. James knew that the lieutenant had many nephews and nieces so he was good with children and Shirogane was charismatic enough that even kids fell for his charms.

“Yeah,” Keith answered distractedly.

“Come here.”

He tugged at his arm, trying to pull him closer. Keith resisted a little at first until he allowed himself to be pulled into James’ lap. James wrapped his arms around him, hugging him until he felt the tension leak out of his body. Keith melted against him surprisingly fast, purring erupting from his chest next. He hardly tried smothering it, which James considered a small victory.

“You did good,” James said, pressing a kiss into soft black hair. “I’m proud of you.”

Keith scoffed. “I don’t need to hear that, Griffin. I know I did good.”

“Don’t hiss at Lieutenant Miller again, please.”

“Sure, if you promise not to growl at Shiro.” Keith elbowed him gently in the ribs when he protested. “You came close to it, don’t deny it.”

“It was instinctual. I saw him reach for Sven and I couldn’t help it.”

“You were protecting him. I guess I can’t fault you.”

James paused. “Keith, about what I said earlier…”

“You’ll have to be more precise. Do you mean when you told me you loved me or when you said you’d like Sven to be your kid?”

There were times when Keith’s candour was more terrifying than useful. James tried not to panic. There had been no mockery in Keith’s tone, no laughter, only a tiny bit of teasing. James didn’t know how to answer, his train of thoughts derailing a little now that Keith was so close. Keith felt good in his lap like that, like he belonged. He wished they weren’t in a ship full of people so he could let his hands roam a little.

“Both. I mean, both were true.”

Keith hummed. He allowed himself to be cuddled, purred a little louder when James nosed at his neck where the mating gland was.

“I know,” Keith said quietly. “I know you’ve had a crush on me. I’m not blind.”

In James’ nightmares, Keith always found out about his crush and mocked him for it. He expected to tense, to brace himself for derision. He didn’t. The Keith in his nightmares was different from the Keith in his arms. This Keith knew him, had come to respect him. This Keith wasn’t cruel.

“I guess it was pretty obvious,” James said wryly.

Keith chuckled. “A little.” He turned his head so James could see his lips pulled up in a smile. “I don’t mind if it’s you. You’re not the loser I remember from our cadet days. You’re a good guy, James.”

“I must be a good guy if you’ve accepted to go on a date with me.”

Keith shifted until they were face to face, their noses almost touching. There was mirth in his eyes. He looked utterly gorgeous with the backlights of the console highlighting him in a purple halo. James reached up to comb the hair out of his face lovingly.

“That’s true,” Keith said with a grin.

“Also the luckiest guy in the whole universe.”

“The guy under the most pressure, you mean.” Keith spoke in a whisper. “I’ve never been on a date before. You’ll have to impress me or I might not want a second one.”

“Damn, could this be true? Am I really the first person to take Keith Kogane out on a date?”

Keith scoffed and tugged at his forelock playfully. “I’ve never been interested in going on a date with anybody else before. Don’t read too much into this, Griffin.”

“Still, it’s an honour for me. Many would kill to be in my place.”

“Now you’re exaggerating. Many would kill to be in my place too, you know? James Griffin was always an awfully popular cadet and he still is a very popular officer. I was at the Garrison for less than a week and I heard three omegas sighing after you.” He pulled James closer by the front of his shirt. “What would they think if they knew what we did on Mizipra, eh?”

James chuckled. He cupped the back of Keith’s neck. “I don’t know. Maybe we could have a repeat in my room and discover what they have to say the next morning?”

“Don’t tempt me. I—”

“Dada!” Sven exclaimed, suddenly appearing beside the seat. “Dada! Come! Mr. Shiro want more story!”

Keith and James startled. They exchanged a wide-eyed glance then grinned in amusement. Before Keith had a chance to get up however, James pulled him down for a kiss.

“Go entertain the captain,” he said afterward, lips tingling. He patted Keith’s rump. “We’ll talk later.”

-

“So, the boss and you…?”

James looked up from his phone to see Zethrid looming over him, huge grin planted on her face. He sighed. “Oh, not this again.”

“I just wanted to congratulate you, little alpha! I know you’ve been pining for him!”

Had he really been this obvious? Apparently, yes.

“Thanks, I guess? There’s nothing between us, by the way.”

“Yet.”

“Yet.” James shook his head, grabbing for the first idea to switch the conversation. “How are you feeling? Are you still woozy?”

It had been half a day since she’d been rescued from the fields. She seemed to be back to her old self again.

She shrugged. “I’m fine. I just want to go back there and punch these bastards in the throat for trying to control me though.”

James chuckled. “Honestly, I’m not sure I’d stop you, but it’s not the right way to go and you know it. What matters is that you’re all right.”

Zethrid raised an eyebrow at him. “Is that so? I thought you hated me.”

“I did. I got over it, however. You’re not a bad person, Zethrid.”

To his horror, she grabbed him in an arm lock and scrubbed her knuckles over the top of his head painfully hard. “Ah! You’re totally right!”

It was his turn to be woozy when she let him go. She slapped his back hard enough to rattle his teeth before going back to sit beside Ezor. Grunting, he combed his fingers through his hair, trying to put it back into a semblance of order. He was glad she was alive but damn he wished she’d be a bit less demonstrative of that huge strength of hers. There would be a bruise on his back he was pretty sure of it.

The inside of the cabin was calm. Assilsa and Assmiya sat pressed against each other, sleeping. (Apparently, Miziprans snored in their sleep, which James found adorable for some reason.) Ezor and Zethrid were talking in low voices, Ezor giggling once in a while. She kept an arm wrapped around Zethrid’s as if she were afraid to lose her again. They hadn’t left each other’s side ever since Zethrid had been saved. Keith had commandeered the tiny sleeping module with Sven so his son could get son rest. He lied on his side browsing on his phone while Sven slept shielded from the rest of the crew. Captain Shirogane and Lieutenant Miller were also talking in low voices. The captain had asked to borrow James’ tablet and he was now busy typing a report he intended to present to Commander Iverson. The guy really couldn’t relax.

James observed them covertly, trying to see signs of that unhappiness he’d sensed in Lieutenant Miller a few months ago. He hadn’t been made privy to the details; they might be on good terms, they still weren’t friends and the lieutenant was a private person. He saw none of it. The lieutenant read what Shirogane typed, giving his insight, suggesting a better turn of phrase, generally being helpful.

Actually, he seemed to be doing all the work, James noted with surprise. Shirogane kept glancing in Keith’s direction, his eyes softening every time. He’d behaved this way ever since he’d learned that Sven was his son. Earlier, he’d spent nearly an hour talking to the boy, getting to know him and looking fascinated by every word that left his mouth. Sven had been receptive to the attention without being overly excited. He had absolutely no idea who this man with the white hair was, after all.

The captain spotted him watching. James looked away, embarrassed to have caught staring. A moment later, Shirogane was seating himself in the co-pilot’s seat with the ease of one used to this. He used to be a pilot—had he missed it? Had he been yearning for a chance to pilot again the way James had? Would Keith hand him the commands of his ship? James wasn’t sure he liked the idea. He liked sitting here, liked being in charge of his crew, liked the trust Keith showed in relinquishing his place.

“I don’t think I got to properly thank you, lieutenant,” the captain began with a warm smile.

James put his phone away. “No thanks needed, captain. I was simply doing my duty.”

“And did it brilliantly. According to Keith, it’s because you befriended Assmiya and Assilsa that you were able to learn about the fair.”

The warm praise in the captain’s voice made him blush. “They are friendly people, captain, it wasn’t difficult.”

“Nonetheless, thank you. I wouldn’t have been able to forgive myself if something had happened to Curtis.” He glanced at his mate lovingly.

James had no idea what to answer. He wasn’t used to such candour. The captain was always nice, and his congratulations were always heartfelt, but this was different. This was him showing raw emotion unhidden behind the mask of duty and the burden of rank. He was simply one man thanking another man. It reminded James of the way the captain had been before Kerberos, back when he’d been James’ hero and he’d never dared dreaming of having a conversation with him. Shirogane had been happier then, more carefree with a smile on his face all the time. He had looked so much younger than this officer with the wise eyes of an elderly.

“I’m glad to have been of help,” James assured, letting honesty bleed into his voice. “It was an honour helping you and Lieutenant Miller.”

Shirogane chuckled. “Was working with Keith difficult?”

“At times,” James admitted with a wry smile. “We didn’t always see things eye to eye. We got over our squabbles, however. We’re both professionals.”

“That is true. Commander Iverson made a good decision when he paired you together.”

Oh yes, he had. Without him, James wouldn’t have spent one of the best weeks of his life. Without the commander, he wouldn’t have a date with Keith. He’d have to find a way to thank him.

“Do you know what will happen with Mizipra now?” James asked.

“We will send a delegation and investigate. The slaves will be freed and sent home. There will surely be retributions. After that, we will probably send supervised workers to tend to the fields. Like it or not, Mizipra does feed half the Coalition.”

“You don’t seem angry at what they did to you.”

Shirogane shrugged. “At the end of the day, neither Curtis nor I were truly harmed. We are tired and battered, but it’s nothing a good night’s sleep can’t fix. What the Miziprans did wasn’t done out of malice. They were probably desperate to keep up with the demand for food without wanting to have to ask for further help. I don’t think a harsh punishment is needed here. If anything, the Coalition is a bit to blame for not checking in more often. We know Mizipra is sparsely populated, yet we never questioned on they managed to produce so much food on their own. There isn’t only one guilty party.”

This was why James respected Shirogane this much. He was so realistic, so down to earth. It was laudable.

“And,” he continued, offering a grin that made him look ten years younger, “without this misadventure, I might never have learned I have a son.”

James talked before thinking: “So you intent on being present in Sven’s life?”

Shirogane regarded him calmly. “Yes. Would that be a problem with you, James?”

Hearing his first name spoken by the captain was weird. They always addressed each other by their rank or by their last name, as did everybody at the Garrison. The deliberate use of his first name indicated to James that Shirogane wanted this to be an honest conversation not stifled by protocols and ranks.

“It doesn’t matter what _I_ want,” James answered, meeting the other man’s eyes squarely. “All that matters is what Keith wants.”

“I can take it to mean that, should you pursue a relationship with Keith, you wouldn’t mind having to deal with me because of Sven?”

James refused to blush. “I wouldn’t mind. You’re Sven’s father. In the end though, it depends on Keith. And I suppose Lieute—Curtis I mean, would have a say in this decision too.” He hesitated, glancing aside. “It’s not my intention to stand between Keith and anyone else should we get together. You two have history. It would be stupid of me to think I can change that.”

“That’s true, though it would be your right as his mate to be concerned. Things have been tensed between Keith and me for the past five years. It was never my intention to make him unhappy. Our timing was simply… off.”

“Would the two of you have been together otherwise?” James asked, inwardly aghast at his boldness.

Shirogane smiled. “Perhaps. There’s no denying we had tender feelings for each other at some point in our lives. It’s in the past however and neither of us has any intention of revisiting those feelings. For the moment, I can only hope we can return to that friendship we once shared.”

He sounded so sincere that James had no difficulty believing him. He suddenly felt petty and mean for having felt threatened by the other man. His instincts told him to push Shirogane off, to keep him away from Keith. His brain told him otherwise; it would always be Shiro and Keith, Keith and Shiro, if not as a couple, at least as friends. James wanted Keith to be happy and, if for him to be happy he had to be friends with Shirogane, who was James to stand between them?

“I understand.” Deciding to keep going in that vein of candour, James said: “I’m very glad you’re safe, captain. It would have been a blow to the Garrison if you’d be lost.”

Shirogane extended one big hand with a smile. “Thank you, lieutenant. It’s good to be back.”

They shook hands.


	22. Chapter 22

Making peace with Captain Shirogane had been easier for James than making peace with Lieutenant Miller was for Keith. He tried, James admired that. He was polite and smiled and did his best to be interested, but it was easy to see it was difficult. It wasn’t dislike for the lieutenant in itself; Keith was simply overly protective of those he loved. He wanted to make sure he was the best for Shirogane and, until he was satisfied, he’d be wary.

“What is Earth like?” Assmiya asked him on their second day of travel. They would be reaching Earth in a few hours and the two Miziprans were looking both excited and terrified. “Tell us again, James.”

“It’s not so dissimilar from Mizipra that you’ll feel lost,” James said slowly, remembering his first impressions of their planet. “The colours are very different. On Earth, the water of the ocean is blue. The grass and the foliage in the trees is green. There’s only one sun that circles around the Earth. One circle means one day. Hm, oh, the sky is blue too, but it does change colour when the sun sets and rises.”

The colours of Assmiya’s skin brightened in a show of interest. “It does get dark at night, you say?”

“Not dark enough that you can’t see. In the day it’s bright. You might need to adjust to this at first.”

“The sun doesn’t hurt?” Assilsa asked.

James laughed. “No, no! Well, it can be painful if you look at it directly, but it cannot kill you.”

Their curiosity was utterly endearing. They reminded James of children who had discovered an interesting new place and yearned to learn everything about it. He assured them that many aliens had made of Earth their home and it was entirely possible to get acclimated to it. What they would do once there was a totally different story; they seemed to possess only minimal skills in anything. Before the touristic industry and before the Voltron Coalition made it its bread basket, the Miziprans had needed few skills to survive. They had no natural predators. Their food was comprised mostly of fruits that could be easily found in trees and roots found in their forests. They didn’t hunt. The only meat they ate came from animals already dead or animals that had been penned in.

They weren’t the only ones in that situation, of course. Hundreds of displaced aliens had arrived on Earth with only the clothes on their back and skills totally useless to their new life. Thanks to the Coalition’s help, they usually found themselves a way to earn a living eventually. James would personally make sure that Assmiya and Assilsa were both looked after. They’d helped him so it was only natural that he help them in return.

“And the humans in charge won’t mind that we cannot produce children?” Assmiya asked, sounding worried.

Although they’d been the one speaking up, James saw that Assilsa had been worrying about this too.

He shook his head, striving to sound reassuring. “No. I promise you that nobody will mind. Whether couples have children or not isn’t anybody’s business. People can be disappointed in your choice or in your inability to procreate, but nobody will force you to find another mate.”

They exchanged a look, a reassuring touch. Assmiya’s scent shifted from worried to hopeful.

“I told you,” Assmiya said to their mate. “James said he broke up with his previous mate of his own volition.”

James blushed a little, embarrassed to realise they’d discussed his situation. Assmiya had probably used him as an example.

Since Assilsa was evidently older, they were a tad more sceptical. “Didn’t you say the Galras had destroyed half the human population? Aren’t you supposed to repopulate your planet?”

James shrugged. “That’s true that the Galras killed a lot of us. That doesn’t mean we have to repopulate overnight, though. Those things usually happen naturally. I mean, from what I’ve heard, births have gone up quite a lot ever since the Coalition was established.”

“It does make sense,” Assilsa said after consideration.

“The people who will help you settle will explain it all to you much more efficiently, I promise,” James assured with a smile. “All you have to think about is that you won’t be separated.”

That seemed to be everything that mattered at the moment.

James was glad that Earth didn’t have the same barbaric practices as Mizipra; he’d have been in trouble for not being able to father children. After the Galran Witch Honerva had been destroyed, after the dust had settled back and the body count had been done, there had been whispers of repopulating the Earth. Thankfully, those had led nowhere. The different leaders of the planet hadn’t wanted to go that way, saying it was better to let people do what they thought was best. There were incentives to have children of course, but couples weren’t punished if they didn’t want any. 

His phone vibrated in his pant pocket. Amongst the messages sent by his team was another message from that number he should have blocked. He felt no rush of adrenaline, no conflicting feelings other than a thin veil of annoyance. He read the message without much interest; Alex once again claimed missing him and that he had something very important to tell him. James blocked the number without replying. This wasn’t worth pursuing. Their relationship hadn’t worked the first time, why did Alex think it would work the second time? Nothing had changed. They were still the same people they had been then.

And he had a chance with Keith now. Despite the fact that they’d barely had the chance to talk ever since they’d left Mizipra, there had been looks exchanged. More than once James had felt Keith’s eyes on him. They would gaze at each other from across the cabin. Whenever they managed to sit close, their hands would brush. All of this served to remind James that whatever they’d shared on Mizipra hadn’t been a fluke. It would continue on Earth. However long it would survive was entirely up to them. James intended for it this to go on for as long as possible.

He didn’t think of the fact that Keith didn’t belong on Earth, that Keith had made a home for himself and for his son on a distant planet, that Keith’s job consisted in traveling the length and breadth of the universe. Realistically speaking, what were the odds that such a relationship could work? How often would they see each other? Would Keith try visiting Earth more often to see him? Would James have to visit him on Daibazaal? Would they try to work around their schedule to meet somewhere once in a while? How would that work? Keith had his ship, James had nothing if the Garrison didn’t want to hand it to him.

Was this all a mistake? Had they been too blinded by the peace on Mizipra to see the truth of the situation? They’d have to talk about this. James didn’t want to leap into this without knowing where he’d land. His heart couldn’t afford another breakage.

-

They reached the Garrison had dusk. Keith took the pilot’s seat back with evident relish. James sat beside him, torn between joy and despair at seeing his little blue planet. The familiar bulk of the Garrison buildings came into view far too fast to his liking. They were hailed by the comm crew. Hearing the voices of people he knew was jarring. He felt slightly detached, like he couldn’t quite wake up from a lingering dream.

A berth had been emptied in one of the least-used hangars of the Garrison. Commander Iverson hadn’t broadcasted the fact that Captain Shirogane had been missing and that a rescue party had been sent after him. To all the world, the captain had gone on a well-deserved retreat with his fiancé.

James barely saw the inside of the hangar, barely saw the few uniformed officers awaiting their return. Amongst them was of course Commander Iverson, flanked on one side by Commander Holt and on the other by Lieutenant Veronica Holt. Behind them were the Green and Yellow Paladin as well as Matt Holt and James’ own team. He felt a thrill of joy at the sight of their smiling faces.

A touch to his hand dissipated the veil of unreality. He blinked, once again grounded in the present. Turning, he saw that Keith had gripped his wrist. Although there was no smile on his face, his eyes were warm, bright, and soft. James shifted the grip so their fingers were entertained. Keith allowed it, even tightened his hold minutely.

Captain Shirogane was the first to disembark. Dressed in ruined civilian clothes, barefoot, the bruises on his face barely beginning to heal, he managed to look proud and impressive. He made his way towards Commander Iverson, stopped, and saluted. Lieutenant Miller remained at his side, saluting too.

Once again, the commander surprised James by breaking protocol. After saluting, he stepped to Shirogane and _hugged_ him. Everybody’s eyes widened, the captain’s included. The embrace lasted less than a second. Already the commander was pulling back, clearing his throat.

“Welcome back, captain, lieutenant. It’s good to see you healthy and hale.” He pulled a face. “Mostly. Med bay is ready to receive you.”

“Thank you, commander. It’s good to be back.” He gestured James, Keith, Zethrid, and Ezor closer. “Though my return might have been delayed had it not been for these four brave people. You chose them well, commander.”

James saluted, the only one to do so. Commander Iverson’s single eye took them in, his mouth pulled down at the corners in his usual moue of disapproval.

“Lieutenant Griffin, Kogane, welcome back to you too. I never doubted that you could pull this off, Griffin, though I must admit I expected you to have abandoned Kogane somewhere on the way back. It’s good to see you are no longer at each other’s throat like the disobedient cadets you were once.”

Out the corner of his eye, he spotted Shirogane wincing in sympathy.

James refused to be intimated. “I did my duty, sir.”

“Back off,” Keith interrupted. “We did great and you know it, Iverson. Why don’t you take Shiro and Curtis to med bay and leave us alone?”

Veronica groaned, closing her eyes as if begging for mercy. Commander Holt hid an amused grin behind his hand. The Paladins chuckled without restraint as did Matt Holt.

“I believe I will, _cadet_ ,” Iverson said annoyingly. “I expect you to fly away now so—”

“I’m staying for a while,” Keith cut. “Expect to see my face around.”

The commander rolled his eyes before turning his attention to Shirogane and Miller.

Once they were out of the room, it was like they were a bunch of children out of their parents’ supervision. The Paladins rushed to Keith and the MFE pilots rushed to James like they hadn’t seen each other for months rather than for a couple of weeks.

“You did it!” Nadia was saying, pounding his back mercilessly. “You brought them back!”

“Congratulations, James,” Ryan said with a small smile. “I always knew you could do it.”

“I believe we all lent a hand here on Earth,” Ina reminded them kindly. “Welcome back, lieutenant.”

“My children,” James joked, smiling wide enough to pain his cheeks. “I’m glad to see you all survived in my absence.” He turned to gesture Assmiya and Assilsa closer. “I’d like to introduce you to the two Miziprans who made it all possible. Team, this is Assmiya and Assilsa. Friends, those are my comrades Ryan Kinkade, Nadia Rizavi, and Ina Leifsdottir.”

Ina was the first one to chat them up. Already she’d picked up a few words in their language and was eager to try them on them. Assmiya and Assilsa were a bit shy at first before warming up to her. Nadia joined Ina and the four of them left the hangar together after Ina had promised James to find accommodations for the Miziprans. Ina was friends with the people in charge of welcoming the newly-arrived aliens so no doubt she knew what to do.

Unless she decided to detain them to question them or until she spoke their language fluently. James decided to check in on them afterwards.

“How are you?” Ryan asked a low voice once they were mostly alone.

James allowed himself a small sigh. “Honestly? I don’t even know. Tired, I guess. The trip back wasn’t very restful; we were way too crowded.”

“I can imagine.” Ryan’s eyes flicked to Keith. “And how did it go with him?”

James couldn’t stop himself; he had to look at Keith. Keith was talking to Pidge Holt and her brother while Hunk was cavorting around the room with Sven on his back, the boy howling with laughter. There was a small smile on Keith’s face. As if he sensed James’ gaze on him, he glanced up. Their eyes met for the briefest of seconds.

“Ah,” Ryan concluded. “It went well.”

Sudden panic gripped James. He grabbed his friend by the front of his shirt and hissed: “We’re having a date! Ryan, I’m having a date with Keith fucking Kogane! How do I survive that?!”

Ryan chuckled, a warm sound that helped soothe his nerves. “You survive the same way you’ve survived everything else, my friend: with good sense, courage, and a bit of luck.”

-

James spent most of the next day locked in his room to type up a full mission report for Commander Iverson. Of course it had befall him to do so instead of Keith. Since Keith was considered a consultant rather than a member of the Garrison personnel, his contribution to the report consisted in his signature at the bottom of it. James had to do all the work.

It was fine by him, really. Going through the familiar turns of phrases and official language of the Garrison made him feel better. He’d barely slept that night, totally disconcerted by the full darkness in his room after he’d turned off the lights—he’d apparently gotten used to the half-light of Mizipra. Also totally disconcerted by the presence of another warm body in his bed. His Garrison-issued cot had felt small, uncomfortable, cold. Twice he’d woken up with his hand reaching for Keith. A million times he’d thought to get up and find him. But he hadn’t. A part of himself was terrified. They hadn’t talked ever since their last conversation on the ship being disembarking. Their paths hadn’t crossed at supper yesterday neither had it at breakfast and lunch today. A hurried conversation with Hunk at the bend of one corridor had told him Keith was busy updating the Blade about what had happened on Mizipra.

The tablet slid from his nerveless fingers. He rubbed his eyes. He could reach out to Keith, could meet him in his quarters. He knew Keith wouldn’t shut him out, yet he was afraid to take that one last step. He’d confessed twice, had assured Keith he’d love being Sven’s father, but actively showing him that James missed him seemed one step too much for now. He didn’t want to appear clingy or desperate, or, worse, pathetic. Keith wouldn’t like an overly-attached boyfriend surely.

They had to talk. Why was it so difficult to do here? Was it the cold, cruel white light of the Garrison that made conversations impossible? Was it the long, straight corridors that afforded no privacy? Was it the stifling uniforms, the unending protocols? All those things James loved seemed to strangle him, stifle him.

He saved his report and got up.

“Stop moping,” he told himself, smoothing down his uniform jacket.

Keith was nice, Keith could be understanding. And anyway, they didn’t have to outright talk right now. They could just hang up for a while—James could use a small break after all.

He left his room to search for Keith. The usual hustle and bustle of the Garrison enveloped him the second he stepped out into the corridor. Everybody had somewhere to go or someplace to be. Commander Iverson had given him three more days of leave before he had to go back to his duties. He kind of wished he had duties to attend to right now just so his overactive brain would be too busy to think.

He went to the Paladins’ quarters that he found empty (he shamefully glanced into Keith’s room to make sure his things were still there). He scouted the kitchens, the lounges, the training eras, the roof, the hangars, and the sim rooms without finding him. His ship was still parked where it had been left so he couldn’t have gone. Nobody he encountered on his trek could tell him more about Keith’s whereabouts. Even Captain Shirogane had no idea where he might be.

James felt foolishly desperate now. It was entirely possible that Keith had gone into town with his son or that he was simply somewhere James hadn’t thought to look for him. He couldn’t have gone far if all his equipment and ship were still here. The best thing to do was simply to leave a message in his room and they’d meet later.

Of course they hadn’t been smart enough to exchange their phone numbers. Weren’t they supposed to once have been the smartest students of the Garrison?

He sighed wearily. He decided to stop by the commissary on his way back; it was the only place to get real food not cooked by the Garrison kitchens, a sort of small corner store for those not up for a trip to town. James suddenly craved chocolate, the thick, cheap kind that would leave him feeling sick afterwards but that did miracles for the mood.

The commissary was in the only wing of the Garrison that allowed civilian visitors. Friends and family of the personnel met with them here. Civilian consultants on all matters also transited through here until they had clearance. It was a place that always bustled with restless energy. The smells of greasy food, cigarette smoke, and cheap booze permeated the air at any time of the day. Although James usually found it disconcerting, he welcomed it today. For some reason he was getting tired of the stale, clean scent of the Garrison.

The second he pushed the door, his ears were assaulted by the shrieks of children visiting their parent working at the Garrison. The air of good cheer put a smile on his lips. One kid ran past him with a bag of chips in his hand while another had a tall glass of sugary juice. The sight of junk food made his mouth water. Though comfort food usually wasn’t his go-to, he decided to make an exception today.

He turned towards the nearest food vendor and stopped dead in his tracks when he spotted a familiar head of blond hair. James swore he’d never dived so quick for cover. He hid behind a vending machine, heart hammering inside his chest. Shit, shit, could he be this unlucky? He glanced again and, yep, he was this unlucky. Here was Alex talking to someone James couldn’t quite see. Damn the guts of that guy, coming here. And yet again, why was he surprised? Pidge Holt had told him Alex had visited the Garrison a few days ago.

What should he do? Should he talk to him or just leave? Honestly, he leaned towards the second option: he was in no mood to deal with a weepy Alex begging for a second chance. James knew he wouldn’t say yes, that he’d send him home alone, yet that didn’t mean he wanted to hurt him either. He didn’t want a shy of tears here, not where everybody could see.

He glanced at Alex again. He was smiling and laughing with someone. He looked in a mood too good to be here for a confrontation.  Should James go talk to him? Ugh, a tiny part of his heart had missed this, missed that smile and those bright blue eyes.

Someone needed to use the vending machine so he stepped out of his hiding place, feeling suddenly exposed. Through the surrounding sounds of conversation, he caught Alex’s voice clear as if they were alone in a room.

Stepping out of his hiding spot gave him a new line of sight. He saw the person Alex was talking to: Keith. Keith with Sven in his arms was talking to Alex while he was clearing waiting for the food he’d ordered from the vendor.

James couldn’t move, couldn’t think. This was the worst. He couldn’t have a fight with Alex in front of Keith. He couldn’t make Alex cry in front of Keith either. Keith knew the story, yet knowing and seeing the consequences of it were two different things.

He would have beaten a hasty retreat had not Sven spotted him over his father’s shoulder. Immediately the boy perked up, raising his hand in the air and calling his name. _Loudly_.

The whole world seemed to slow to a crawl. Keith turned to look at him, eyebrows raising in a silent question. Beside him however, Alex’s face had turned chalky white. His eyes widened. His whole demeanour shifted, going from easy and open to frightened.

Frightened? What? This wasn’t what James had expected. His instincts kicked in, the need to protect a distressed omega he knew taking over. He walked to them, looking around, sure there was a threat. Except this was stupid because they were on Garrison grounds and Keith certainly would have picked on a threat long before a civilian like Alex had.

They had to make a strange tableau indeed: James standing there frozen, Alex with a distressed look on his face, and Keith looking increasingly confused while Sven extended his arms towards him in greeting. There was no hiding that the boy knew him, trusted him enough to demand being picked up.

“James,” Alex mumbled.

“Alex,” James greeted, unable to come up with anything else to say.

Keith seemed to understand what was going on. Abruptly, his smell shifted to grow bitter enough that even Alex flinched from it. Picking up on this, Sven turned big worried eyes towards his father. Keith’s lips were pressed into a thin line, his only outward expression that something bothered him.

“You should have told me this was James you were here to see,” Keith said. “I’d have called him for you.”

“You two know each other?” Alex asked, uncertain.

“Keith—” James said.

“I should leave you to talk. I’ll see you later.”

With that, Keith took the food he’d ordered and marched away, a puzzled Sven in his arms.

“He’s _the_ Keith?” Alex asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “I can understand the pining.”

“What? Look, let’s talk elsewhere.”

James grabbed Alex by the wrist and tugged him towards the door that lead out. Outside, the sun shone bright and myriad visitors were taking their ease on benches and seated at picnic tables.

Alex crossed his arms the second James let go of him. “Hi.”

James regarded him warily. “Hi. I blocked your number.”

“I figured.”

He heaved a sigh. “Alex, what are you doing here? We haven’t talked for months. I’m just back from a mission and I’m tired. I really don’t want to fight.”

“I’m not here to fight, I promise.” He smiled. “I do miss you, though, I suppose I should have told you I didn’t say that in the hopes of us being together again.”

“I hope not.”

Alex nodded towards the door. “I finally got to meet your Keith. He’s very impressive. I can understand why you love him so much.”

James didn’t know what to say. There was no jealousy or anger in Alex’s tone or in his scent. In fact, he looked pretty content, happy even, a sharp contrast to the devastating sadness that had swirled in his eyes when they’d last talked.

“Yeah, Keith’s pretty great,” James admitted honestly. “That still doesn’t explain your presence here or why you’ve been texting me.”

Alex shifted from foot to foot, averting his gaze. The sun shining on his head made his hair look like burnished silver. He was pretty like a picture, all smooth cheeks and big blue eyes. Everybody had called James lucky to have found himself such a mate. Other alphas had grinned knowingly at Alex’s narrow waist and long legs. And he was beautiful, James couldn’t deny that. All the bitter resentment that had crowded the last months of their relationship couldn’t erase the physical attraction.

Alex sighed. “Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t want things to go this way. I should have told you sooner, but I was a coward. The reason why we broke up… hm… you know how my father ran those fertility tests for you, right?”

James nodded. Alex’s father was a doctor so, obviously, they’d gone to him first when there was still no baby after many tries.

“He wasn’t… quite honest about the results.”

“Whatever do you mean? Alex, just say it. You know I won’t be angry.”

Alex grabbed his arm. “Remember we sat in front of him in his office when he told us the results? He said ‘You can’t have children’, right? He meant me, James, not you. It was my fault. My father didn’t want the shame to be mine so he put it on you. He knew I wouldn’t find a good mate if I couldn’t conceive and—I’m so, so sorry. I’ve been trying to find the courage to tell you since he told me.”


	23. Chapter 23

James couldn’t remember sitting down. One minute he was standing on his own two feet, the next there was a hard wood bench under his butt. The world span a little around him, going blurry. There was a firm hand on his arm providing some grounding. He blinked.

Alex’s words ran in his head, clanging at the walls of his skull like birds stuck in a cage. They made such a ruckus that he could hardly make sense of them. His breathing was laboured, harsh, catching in his throat. His heart beat far too fast, a tempo echoing in his ears. He wondered if he was having a panic attack.

“James,” Alex was saying, tightening his hold on his arm. “James, are you okay? Look at me.”

Alex grabbed his jaw and forced him to turn his head in his direction. His big blue eyes were full of worry. His cheeks were chalky making the freckles stand out starkly.

Slowly, the world reasserted itself. The noisy chattering of the people lazing about reached his brain. He became aware of the sunrays warming his face, the small breeze ruffling his hair, the texture of the wood of the bench he sat on. He became aware of Alex’s fingers gripping his jaw not quite hard enough to leave a bruise.

His eyes focused and Alex immediately relaxed.

“Oh, you’re back. I’m so sorry,” he said gently.

“It’s fine,” James mumbled. He pushed his fringe back from his sweaty forehead. “Sorry. I just… sorry.”

“It’s okay, don’t apologize. Do you… remember what I just told you?”

Remember? How could he forget?

Elation mixed with dread with a hefty dose of terror threatened to submerge him again. He took in a deep breath, pushing it down until he felt in control of himself again. He had to take this slow.

“Yes. You said your father lied to us. You’re the one who’s barren.”

Alex winced slightly, and James realised how terrible this must be for him. His father had lied to him, had lied to both of them. Alex didn’t deal well with betrayal. He’d always been close to his parents; how horrible it must be for him to be betrayed that way.

“That’s it,” Alex said, hiding his pain behind a smile. “I should have reached out to you sooner. I just…” He looked away. “I know how hurt you were by this. I didn’t want to cause further harm. I’m sorry, I’m a coward. I was never brave like you.”

“Don’t say that.”

James rubbed his eyes. The enormity of this revelation tried to settle on him like a weight. He didn’t let it crush him, not yet. He thought back on all the times he’d slept with Keith, never once bothering to use a rubber because they’d both been clean. They hadn’t feared pregnancy because they’d thought it impossible. Mercifully, he’d noticed the small scar on Keith’s arm indicating he had a birth-control implant, so he didn’t have to worry on that account. Keith would have gutted him otherwise.

“It’s fine, it’s the truth.” Alex patted his arm, smiling. “You can be a father, James. Be happy. I know you’re going to be a great dad.” The smile turned into a mischievous grin. “You can have kids with Keith now, eh?”

James’ cheeks burned. “L-let’s not get hasty.”

“Why not? I smelled you on him. He doesn’t seem like the kind of omega who’d allow any alpha to scent him. You were away on a mission with him, weren’t you?”

“Yes, we were on a mission together. Alex, we had _to pretend to be a couple_. How cheesier can this get?”

Alex laughed. “And it worked, didn’t it? You got closer. I can tell. He got jealous when he realised who I was. I think he really likes you.”

James’ heart skipped a beat. He’d hardly dared believing this, hardly dared think that Keith might like him back. Hearing someone else say it out loud seemed to make it more possible. “I wish he did.”

“Tell him of your feelings, then.”

“I already did. Twice. And I told him I’d love being Sven’s father.”

Alex’s eyes widened. “Really? Well, it couldn’t be clearer.”

James grinned sheepishly. “And he agreed to come on a date with me.”

“Is that so?! Don’t forget to send me an invite when you get married!”

James laughed. “As I said, let’s not get hasty.” He paused, taking in the other man’s open smile. “You look happy. I’m glad. I was worried about you.”

And he did look happy, happier than James had seen him in a long time. There was a glow to his eyes and a flush to his cheeks that hadn’t been there at the end of their relationship.

“I met someone,” Alex said in a singsong voice. “Actually, it’s a guy I knew in my youth. He’s been away for years. I thought he’d died in the Galra invasion, but apparently not. He came back six months ago. We got reacquainted.”

“Alex, that’s great, I’m happy for you!”

Alex chuckled. “Thanks, Jamie. It seems things might turn out fine for the both of us in the end.”

“I believe they will.”

Alex’s eyes flicked to the side and, when James followed his gaze, he saw Sven approaching shyly. The boy’s uncertainty vanished the second James smiled at him. He rushed across the ground and threw himself at James’ legs, asking to be picked up in his mixed Galran and English. James did so eagerly, sitting the kid on his lap.

“Dada got me this!” he said proudly, brandishing an ice cream cone.

The pinkish ice cream was melting already, dribbling down the cone and onto his fingers. Sven didn’t seem to mind the mess. He licked at his fingers once in a while to avoid the droplets falling on his already dirty pants.

From above Sven’s mop of dark hair, James caught Alex’s amused grin. “You’re really going to be a great dad,” he said knowingly.

James tried not to blush. “I’ll certainly do my best.”

They both got up when Keith approached, the scowl on his face inadequately hiding his embarrassment. He walked with his hands dug deep into the pockets of his jacket.

“Keith,” James greeted, hoping nobody noticed the eagerness in his tone. “I think I caught something that belonged to you.”

Keith scoffed. “He’s been haranguing me to see you. I hope you don’t mind.”

James tightened his hold on Sven in his arms. “You know I don’t.” He offered a smile. “I should introduce the two of you. Keith, this is Alex. Alex, this is Keith, the former Black Paladin and the leader of the Blade of Marmora. And this is Sven, his son.”

Alex smiled and extended a hand. “Quite an impressive background, Keith. It’s very nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard all of your exploits as a Paladin of Voltron. Thanks for saving the universe.”

Keith looked embarrassed. He glanced away before shaking Alex’s hand. “Nice to meet you too. And there’s no need to thank me; we weren’t alone in this.” He nodded towards James. “That guy’s a hero too.”

A surreal feeling enveloped James. He stood there with Sven in his arms, watching the two guys he’d ever loved discussing in a more or less amicable manner. It was like his two lives were colliding together, not to explode messily, but to fuse almost seamlessly. It was nice.

“I know Jamie’s a hero,” Alex said, grinning. “Everybody knows but him.”

James blushed. “O-oh, shush.”

Keith offered a small smile, and James wondered if he weren’t going to liquefy the same way Sven’s ice cream was.

“I should leave you to it,” Alex announced. “It was nice meeting you, Keith.” He smiled at James. “I’ll see you, I hope?”

“Yeah, I’d like that. And I’d like meeting the guy you like.”

“It was nice meeting you too, Alex. You’re much nicer than I expected.”

Alex laughed. “So are you. Well, see you later!”

He waved cheerily before turning on his heels, soon disappearing amongst the small crowd. James watched him go, realising how light he suddenly felt. It wasn’t simply Alex’s revelation that was making his heart soar, it was the closure. In half an hour, they’d gotten the closure that had been eluding them. He felt he had gained a friend rather than losing a boyfriend. It made him realise that he’d been missing the friendship he’d enjoyed with Alex when they’d first met. Suddenly, he understood why Keith and Captain Shirogane were so desperate to return to that.

He jumped when something cold seeped through his uniform jacket. Looking down, he saw that a chunk of Sven’s ice cream had fallen on his shirt.

“Oh, no, not your perfectly pressed uniform,” Keith teased. “Don’t tell me you have to take it off.”

James grinned. “Want me to? In front of all those people?”

Keith’s eyes flashed. He tugged him closer by the collar, wrinkling it beyond repair. “I bet pretty little Alex would come running back if you did.”

There was a hint of jealousy in Keith’s smell. James’ alpha pride skyrocketed fast enough to leave him dizzy. Between them, Sven kept eating his ice cream, totally uncaring for what was happening or that he was making a mess of James’ jacket.

“And you? Would you come running?”

“Why should I? I can let him ogle you because I know it’s to me you’ll be coming back to afterward.”

They said a possessive alpha was something to be reckoned with, but a possessive omega wasn’t to be scoffed at. James’ insides churned with mingled lust and pride and love. He wished they were alone, wished he could prove to Keith that yes, he’d always come back to him.

When he leaned in to kiss him, Keith put a hand on his mouth, pushing him back. “Nope. No date, no kiss.”

James had to laugh. He grabbed Keith’s hand to kiss his knuckles, flashing him a grin. “All right then. Tomorrow night. Be ready.”

They stared at each other.

“Eww!” Sven suddenly exclaimed, wrinkling his face.

-

“What exactly is a date, James?”

James groaned at Assmiya’s question.

A new residence had been found for the Miziprans in town and James had volunteered to drive them. He wanted to make sure they had everything they needed and that they had been treated with the utmost curtesy. He’d heard through the grapevines that discussions with Mizipra about what had happened with Captain Shirogane and the others weren’t going smoothly. James wasn’t kept in the loop despite having put in a request to be allowed on the committee that would decide what to do next. He felt he could bring in good input but, apparently, such thing was above his paygrade. There were days when he hated the Garrison’s stiff hierarchy.

“It’s…” He frowned, thinking. “It’s when you take your crush out in hopes of impressing them.”

He opened the door of the Humvee and helped the two Miziprans to climb in. They had no luggage since, apparently, they didn’t need clothes, toiletries, or anything of the sort. It had made James realise that they went about naked instead of draped in a big sheet like he had believed at first.

Assmiya and Assilsa sat on the backseat, looking around in amazement. They’d been gawking at everything ever since their arrival three days ago. Seeing them marvel at the smallest thing was adorable. Everybody had been quite eager to help them acclimate themselves to their new routine on Earth. For the moment they’d be living in supervised residences where they’d get all the help they might need. Once they were ready, they would move out and begin their new life.

“Why would you need to impress Keith?” Assmiya asked, leaning forward.

James sat behind the wheel, glancing at them in the rear-view mirror. “You do know that Keith and I aren’t really mates, right? We had to pretend.” He manoeuvred the Humvee out of the garage and onto the stretch of road that lead away from the Garrison buildings. “As it turns out, I always had a crush on him and, well, apparently he likes me enough to give me a chance to woo him.”

“So this is how human couples are formed? They… impress each other?” Assilsa asked.

James chuckled. “More or less. It really depends on each individual.”

“Do you think Keith will be impressed?” Assmiya asked eagerly.

The knots in James’ stomach tightened further. He’d been anxious ever since he woke up that morning knowing that tonight was his date with Keith. He’d been going on about his day in a state of near panic, one half of his brain thinking about the date while the other tried to function normally. Needless to say everything had been a disaster. He wasn’t even sure driving these two around was a good idea.

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “Keith isn’t easily impressionable. You saw him, you know what he’s like.”

Assmiya thought for a moment before formulating their next question. “What do you intend to do then?”

“Well, he’s mentioned wanting to go to the fair that’s happening in town, so I’m taking him and Sven tonight. I want him to have fun and relax a little since he’s always keyed up and serious. After that, I want to take him into the desert, where we had our first flight lesson together.” He added fondly: “It was the first time I saw him smiling a real smile. I’ll never forget it.”

“Is it supposed to be impressive?”

James laughed nervously. “I don’t know? I’m going more for romantic than impressive. How can you impress a guy who’s been a Paladin of Voltron and who’s seen half of the known universe?”

Assmiya remained quiet, thinking about this.

Damn, merely talking about it was making him more nervous. He concentrated on his driving, sure that Keith would certainly not be impressed if he crashed the Humvee with their guests inside. Thankfully, the long stretch of road that linked the Garrison to the town was straight, broad, flat, and mostly empty at this time of day.

Signs of the Galra invasion five years ago still marred the countryside. Craters like pockmarks ruined the land on either side of the road. What little trees or vegetation had thrived before had been blasted to smithereens. James had grown used to this sight, had mostly forgotten what this place had looked like before.

The city was another story altogether. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to the scars left by the Galras. Whole blocks had been destroyed that had yet to be rebuilt. Some neighbourhoods were still corded off because the rubbles had yet to be cleared away. James’ childhood home no longer existed, replaced by a huge hole. Nothing of it remained, not even a plank of wood. He knew, he’d checked against his better judgement. The middle school Keith and he had attended had taken a lot of damages, though it still stood and was still being used.

James saw it in passing and, suddenly, Alex’s words came back to him. He could have kids. He could have kids and send them to that school. He could show them where he’d grown up, where he’d studied.

The honking of a horn startled him out of his reverie; the light had turned green while he stalled there, lost in his thoughts.

“You look happy,” Assmiya said, a smile in their voice.

“Oh, I am. Despite everything, I am.”

They reached their destination soon after. The residences were owned by the Garrison and many different species of aliens already lived there. It was a nice blend of foreign and Earthly customs. James knew a few of the people who worked here and they loved it. They loved welcoming newcomers and helping them settle. If every alien that lived there was anything like Assmiya or Assilsa, James understood why.

“There you go,” he said, helping them out of Humvee. “Home, far from home.”

They stood on the sidewalk, looking over at the long, narrow building that would house them for the foreseeable future. Their colours were high, their eyes gleaming. They looked utterly happy, utterly confident that only good things awaited them. James felt a surge of affection for them that nearly brought tears to his eyes.

Assmiya was the first to hug him. He froze at the startling display of affection. Their skin was soft like silk, warm, odd. Their body felt gelatinous, like they had no bone underneath the skin. He returned the embrace nonetheless.

“Thank you so much for your help, James,” Assilsa said after hugging him too. “We are so grateful to you. Without you, we would have been separated.”

 “Don’t say that. You helped yourselves. You were brave enough to tell us the truth about what was going on and you were brave enough to risk leaving your planet for what you believe in. I only provided the lift to Earth.”

Assmiya laughed, a tinkling sound. “You’re very humble. Good luck with your future mate, James. Keith is one lucky person.”

James blushed. “Thank you. I’ll try visiting, I promise. In the meantime, don’t hesitate to communicate with me if you need anything. I’ll always be happy to help.”

-

James had been on dates before, with Alex as well as with other people. Never had he been this nervous.

He looked at his reflection in the mirror. All he could see was his pale face and his too-big eyes. He had the appearance of a guy awaiting execution rather than a guy going on a date with the love of his life

He’d changed thrice already, never happy with what he chose. His already minimal choices of civilian clothing seemed even more pathetic. He couldn’t go with his Garrison uniform because Keith would disapprove, so at least this was one outfit out of the equation. Should he go with casual? Not too casual? He had the suit he’d worn at Ryan’s wedding, but hell, he couldn’t wear a suit on an outing to a fair.

He opted for jeans, a t-shirt, and a light jacket, and hoped his charms would be enough.

In the corridor, he met Captain Shirogane and James felt shabby and ridiculous next to him. The captain smiled conspiratorially at him before going on his way, probably to yet another meeting. James took a deep breath. All right, he might not be big or tall or handsome or confident like Captain Shirogane, he still had a few things going for him.

He was… he had… well, at least he…

“I was afraid you’d wear your Garrison uniform,” Keith commented.

James hadn’t even realised he’d reached the Paladins’ quarters or that he’d knocked at the door.

He gaped. He stood on the threshold and merely gawked at Keith who raised an eyebrow at him. Keith had braided his hair and the pants he wore were sinfully tight and his jacket brought out the purple in his eyes. He looked gorgeous and James couldn’t stop staring.

Sven hugging his leg brought him out of his reverie. He shook himself and crouched in front of the boy, patting his hair, glad for the chance to break eye contact with Keith.

“Hey, poppet, ready to have fun?”

Sven nodded eagerly. “Yes! I be nice! I promise!”

James laughed. “I know you will, poppet. You’re always very nice.”

“Except when he throws a tantrum because I forced him to wear pants,” Keith said with a fond sigh.

Sven scowled. “I hate pants!”

“Everybody wears pants, Sven, even your dad and me. Grownups have to, so you’ll have to get used to it,” James commented with a smile.

Sven crossed his arms over his chest. “Shucks.”

“Come on,” Keith said, picking him up. “The fair will make you forget about that. If James can move, maybe we’ll be able to go?”

James moved aside, realising he’d been blocking the door. He felt stupid and clumsy and young, like this was his first date ever. He ran a hand through his hair, afraid a strand might have pulled out of place.

Seeing this, Keith rolled his eyes, handed him Sven, and carded his fingers through James’ hair, messing it up completely.

“There, you look much better. You’re not a soldier tonight, James, relax a little, jeez.”

“I’d like to.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Keith commented, not unkindly. “It’s just me.”

That’s the thing, it’s _you_ , James wanted to retort. It was the chance of a lifetime, the date he’d been dreaming of ever since he’d realised his feelings for Keith. He didn’t say so however, not wanting to sound desperate.

Still, being close to Keith calmed him. He decided to behave like he had when they’d been on the mission; with quiet confidence. Either the date worked out or it didn’t. There was no point agonising about the outcome when it hadn’t even started yet.

They met a suspiciously high number of their acquaintances as they made their way towards the indoor garage. Nadia first grinned at James, then Ryan nodded at him. Ina saluted like he was a soldier marching to the battlefield. They knew of the date and they were wishing him luck. Although he appreciated the gesture, he wished they’d been more subtle about it. He could smell Keith’s amusement though he did a good job at keeping his face straight.

Pidge Holt walked down the corridor in the opposite direction. When her eye met James, she twisted the cap off her pen with a dangerous grin. Red ink spilled. He gulped, knowing what this meant. Mercifully, Hunk only waved at them with a big smile. There was no threats in his action and James was infinitely thankful; he really didn’t want to get on the bad side of a guy twice his size.

Captain Shirogane’s path also crossed theirs. He winked at Keith and Keith scowled at him, looking so much like his son earlier that James would have laughed if he hadn’t been so nervous.

James thought he was in the clear after they’d reached the car in the garage when he heard Ezor’s booming voice calling from the other side.

“ _Behave, you two! Have fun!_ ”

“I will kill her,” Keith hissed through clenched teeth. “It’s so embarrassing.” He was blushing, hanging his head so his hair fell across his red face.

James realised at this moment that this was nerve-wrecking for Keith too. He was simply better at hiding it.

“She’s just looking out for you,” he said with a smile.

Keith scoffed. “I really don’t need chaperones.” He frowned at the car. “Wait, is that your car? Why are there two baby seats?”

“Ryan’s nice enough to let me borrow his. As you can imagine, I don’t have a baby seat in mine.”

Keith looked oddly touched by this simple attention, like James would be dumb enough to let Sven sit on the backseat without being properly buckled up. Sven had never sat in a car before, and Keith struggled with the buckles and belts of the seat, grumbling under his breath while James tried not to laugh.

Finally, five minutes later, they were ready to hit the road. The sun was setting on the horizon, painting the landscape in a canvas of various shades of reds. James did his best to drive smoothly, acutely aware of the two other people in the car with him. Sven was looking out the window with big eyes at the vast expanses of desert stretching on either side.

“I never noticed how this had changed,” Keith said in a low voice. “The Galras really did a number on this place.”

“We’re rebuilding. Whole neighbourhoods in town have been rebuilt. It’s not so bad.”

“Do you parents still live here?”

“Yeah, though they’ve moved since our old house has been destroyed.”

“Will I get to meet them?”

Surprised, James glanced at Keith out the corner of his eye. In the gloom of the cabin, his eyes glittered with mischief. He’d leaned in a bit, resting his elbow on the console between their two seats.

“Would you like to meet them?” James asked cautiously.

“Honestly? No. They seem like a bunch of assholes.”

This tore a laugh out of James. “My mother’s not so bad. She’d like you. My father, not so much. I can already imagine the litany of reproaches he’ll have for you.”

“Really?” Keith asked, a smile in his voice.

“Oh, yeah.” James deepened his voice to mimic his father’s and said: “’He’s too independent for an omega. He shouldn’t work so much. He shouldn’t carry a knife. He shouldn’t speak his mind. He should be nicer.’” He sighed. “And so on and so forth.”

“Damn, now I really want to meet him just to piss him off.”

James chuckled. He’d really like seeing this, seeing the annoyance in his father’s face when he met Keith. _If_ he met Keith.

“At least you’ve already met my mother,” Keith continued, sinking deeper into his seat.

“She’s impressive. After meeting her, I understand why you are the way you are.” At Keith’s inquisitive hum, he added: “Keith, your mom’s an _alien_. Don’t you think that explains why you’ve always been a bit… different from the rest of us? That certainly explains your good looks.”

Keith snorted. “Why? Because My handsomeness is _out of this world_?”

James laughed. “Actually, you’re more pretty than handsome, just like your mom.”

“Meh, do you take after your father? Is he handsome?”

James shrugged. “I don’t know.” He reached out to pat Keith’s knee. “I don’t know if he’s handsome like me.”

Keith grabbed his hand, sliding it higher until it rested comfortably on his thigh. “Except for Shiro, there aren’t many blokes more handsome than you.”

James swore that, had he been a mediocre driver, he’d have crashed the car right there. He stiffened, unsure whether the words or the position of his hand affected him the most. He chose to say nothing, afraid he might start digging his own grave. Instead, he chose to enjoy the comfortable silence. On the backseat, Sven occasionally piped up with some comment, usually in Galran.

This reminded James vividly of those long summer evenings back when his family had been whole. He remembered sitting on the backseat between his sister and brother after spending the day out, his parents at the front, his father driving steadily while his mother fiddled with the radio. He remembered watching the landscape zoom by, the road illuminated by the tall lampposts. He had been content then, happy, the feeling of safety so taken for granted it had never crossed his mind it could disappear.

He hoped that Sven was feeling contented and safe and happy right now, that he was enjoying that small trip, instinctively knowing at the back of his mind that the two adults seated at the front would die to protect him.

They reached the town twenty minutes later. Traffic got thicker since it was a Friday night and many of the off-duty personnel of the Garrison wanted to spend the evening out. Keith leaned in to take in the sights of the town where he’d grown up. He hadn’t been here ever since the invasion, so he hadn’t yet seen the reconstruction effort.

“Why not circle the town to reach the fair?” Keith asked distractedly.

“I want you to see what we’ve been doing here for the past five years.”

“Hm.” He pulled a face. “Ugh, the school still stands, apparently.”

“Yeah. It’s indestructible apparently. Don’t you want to send Sven to school here?”

Keith scoffed, still looking out the window. “No way. There’s no need for him to waste his time sitting at a desk. The Blade will provide all the education he needs.”

“He’ll be a member of the Blade too?”

“That’s his birthright. If he doesn’t want to, well, we’ll reassess, but nothing he can learn here will be useful.”

James couldn’t fault this reasoning. If Sven were to spend his life roaming the universe like his father, nothing taught at an Earth school would be very useful.

They crossed the town following the main roads to give Keith time to get a good impression of how things had changed. He didn’t look particularly wistful or regretful. He had never liked his life here, after all. His real life had started when he’d joined the Garrison. To the best of James’ knowledge, he’d never once again set foot in town unless he’d absolutely had to. And why would he have? There had been nothing for him here; his father was dead, he had no family, no friends. The only people he’d gotten along with had been at the Garrison.

They reached the fair in due time. By then the sun had nearly complexly disappeared behind the horizon, its presence only a lingering red line against the blackness of the sky. The fair had diminished in size after the invasion. Some people had even said rebuilding it had been stupid while others had thought it a good idea. The citizens needed a distraction, needed to have fun and change their mind after all the unpleasantness of the past years. So the rides had been fixed, the vendors had been called back, the grounds had been remade. There was a shabbiness to it that hadn’t been there before that James had grown to love. Just like him, the fair had gone through some shit. Although it hadn’t escaped unscathed, it still stood strong.

“I think it’s safe to eat here this time,” James joked as he parked the car.

“I certainly hope so.” Keith grinned at him. “You owe me cotton candy after all.”

“I’ll get you all the cotton candy you want as long as you promise not to throw up on the floor of Ryan’s car.”

“I’d never do that!”

When they’d decided to visit the fair here, James had feared they’d have flashbacks of what had happened on Mizipra. Instead, he found the two fairs too different to be likened. The fairgrounds here were bigger. There were more rides and the smells of Earth food supplanted everything else. Furthermore, the humans were in far larger number than the aliens, and none of those aliens were Miziprans.

They stood in line to get their tickets. Sven, excited, pointed at everything, babbling and asking questions. Keith held his hand, keeping him close. His excitement was contagious and soon, James felt as excited as a kid too. The sounds of revelry, the screams of joy, the laughter, the merry-go-round music, the trumpets and horns, it served to remind him they were safe on Earth. They were safe to have fun.

Since they weren’t on a mission this time, they were free to amble around. Unthinkingly, James took Keith’s hand. This felt natural, like they had been doing this for a long time. Keith didn’t pull away. He allowed Sven to walk a few steps ahead of them. The boy looked everywhere, trying to see everything that could be seen. He didn’t seem to fear anything. Once, a big dog on a leash barked at him and Sven barely twitched.

“That reminds me,” James said, “where’s Kosmo?”

“On Daibazaal. He’s become too big to fit in my ship. Sven can ride him easily.”

“That must be fun.”

“Terrifying, actually. I never know where Kosmo might take him. I know he’d never put Sven in danger, but still.”

They reached the part of the ground reserved for children. Here, the rides were much smaller, slower. The colours were bright. There were mascots selling balloons and waving at the kids. There were also mini ability games where actual prizes could be won. In his youth, this had been James’ favourite part of the park.

“Dada, I want to try that,” Sven exclaimed, pointing at a stall.

The game consisted in throwing fake knives at a target. Of course Sven would like knives, just like his father.

They let Sven have his fun, competing against other children his age. Like kids were wont to do, the competition didn’t last for very long. After two rounds they grew bored and started playing with each other while the adults looked on.

Afterward, Sven asked to ride one kiddie ride which consisted in a tiny train going around in slow circles. Keith allowed it without fuss though a few of the kids coming off were bawling. One had puked down their shirt.

Sven had gone to space, he’d ridden in a spacecraft, a train didn’t scare him. In fact he found it boring.

This kid was going to be terrifying when he grew up.

Sven decided his next activity would be an ability game with a water pistol this time. James crouched beside him and helped him hold the plastic pistol correctly, positioning his fingers the right way. The other kids looked on with big eyes while a few of the parents frowned in disapproval.

“You keep your arms extended, steady. Just like that. There you go, Sven, you can do it.”

He stepped back to enjoy the show, smiling at the display of half a dozen toddlers handling plastic guns and getting soaked in the process.

James noticed that a few of the parents were glancing at Keith and him, muttering behind their hands. He didn’t recognize them as members of the Garrison personnel. He ignored them, choosing instead to wrap an arm around Keith’s waist. He felt possessive, especially considering the number of alphas mingling about.

Sven didn’t win, finishing second instead, and he was a bit miffed about it. Just like his fathers, he had a competitive streak that wouldn’t be satisfied with anything but the first place. It was kind of cute even if James knew this could cause trouble later on. Not that he disapproved; he’d always been competitive too, after all. 

They moved on afterwards. Keith grumbled that Sven got wet and that it was a good thing it was summer. Sven himself didn’t seem to mind. Ten minutes later he’d completely forgotten about his loss with the water guns. He was ready to try a new game while James and Keith watched on, standing amongst the other parents.

This struck James after the fourth or fifth occurrence. Keith and he just stood there with the other parents watching their kids compete in silly games. They stood there like _ordinary_ parents. Nobody knew who they were, nobody knew what they had done. They were only two guys looking after their kid.

 _Their_ kid. They probably thought James was Sven’s father. How he wished they were right. Perhaps one day it would be _his_ kid he watched play, _his_ kid that had fun with the other children. It was possible now. Maybe, in a few years, he would have a child of his own with Keith. They would give Sven a little brother or a little sister, someone to play with and to love and cherish.

“You have a dopey smile on your face,” Keith said, tugging on his arm. “What are you thinking about?”

“Wondering what our kids would look like.”

This surprised Keith. His eyebrows climbed high on his forehead and his cheeks darkened. “Uh, okay?”

“I’m joking, silly.”

He hadn’t told Keith what Alex had said yesterday. He’d been keeping it close to his heart, relishing it, cherishing it. Somehow, he feared mentioning this might scare Keith off. They weren’t even dating, weren’t even sure they’d date one day, so what was the point of discussing children?

Keith forgot this the second James brought him cotton candy. He’d slipped away while Keith was talking to Sven and, when he turned to say something to James, he was greeted by the puffy pinkish candy. His eyes went comically huge. His expression brightened. The genuine smile that pulled his lips up warmed James’ heart. He took the stick from James, tore a piece of candy off, and shoved it into his mouth. He closed his eyes in appreciation, letting the sugar melt on his tongue. Watching him felt like a religious experience. James could imagine him all too easily as a child getting this excited.

He gave a small piece of the cotton candy to Sven who observed it from all angles. He twisted it in his hands, frowning, before poking his tongue out for a tiny taste. Just like his father’s, his features transformed. He pushed the piece of cotton candy into his mouth, grinning.

“Don’t eat too much,” James said, wiping the corner of Sven’s mouth. “There’s a lot of sugar in this.”

“Do you want some?” Keith asked.

“Nah, I’m good. I don’t really have a sweet tooth.”

Keith pulled a face. “You’re just a killjoy. Sven and I will enjoy it on our own.”

Between the two of them, the cotton candy disappeared in record time. James couldn’t stop himself from grinning at the adorable picture they made. He snapped a photo of the two of them with their mouths full of candy. Keith didn’t seem to mind; he smiled and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, looking a little shy.

They stopped for real food afterwards. Keith was hungry _again_ and wanted to eat fries. James agreed; suddenly the greasy smells of oily food made him hungry too. They sat at a picnic table to eat. Sven looked infinitely fascinated by what was in his plate. He got ketchup all over himself which he seemed to find hilarious. He had troubles using a straw at first, which in turn made James and Keith laugh.

They talked about inconsequential things while they ate. Keith recounted his missions with the Blade, the planets they had helped, the refugees they had fed. He sounded honestly proud of his work, proud to have turned an organization of killers into an organization meant for the relief of suffering. There was a light in his eyes that James hadn’t seen often in all their years of acquaintance. Keith was honestly happy. He had found his place in the world. James was glad for it.

Keith asked tentative questions about his family, being careful in case this was still a sore subject. James was glad to recount stories about his childhood. He liked breathing life into his siblings, his cousins, his uncles and his aunts. Keith listened with attention, focused on him. He didn’t look bored or to be listening out of politeness. He genuinely seemed to want to know more about James’ family.

So James talked until they both realised at the same time that Sven was swaying with tiredness on his seat. James jumped to his feet and grabbed him, pulling him close. Sven mumbled something, eyelids drooping shut. His cheeks were dirty, his hands sticky, his clothes stained certainly beyond saving. The second James had him in his arms he fell asleep, a dead weight resting against his chest.

“I think we should go,” he said.

“Yeah, good idea,” Keith agreed, picking up their trash.

The noise of the fair wasn’t dying down yet. Families were packing up, ready to go home. In their place, young adults were drifting in, all of them bright-eyed and fresh-faced.

“The joys of having a kid,” Keith said wryly as they made their way out.

James shifted Sven in his arms to a more comfortable position. “What, would you prefer to spend the night here going on rides with the teenagers?”

Keith snorted. “I’m way too old for that.”

“Do you think Sven can sleep in the car for a while? There’s something I’d like to show you.”

“I don’t see why not. That kid can sleep through anything. Once, we were helping delivering medical supplies on a planet and our ship got attacked. Sven slept through it all without ever waking up.”

“Does this happen often, you getting attacked like that?”

“Nah, don’t worry. I wouldn’t bring Sven otherwise.”

They walked back to the car and James put Sven into his seat. He’d mocked Keith earlier for his struggles with the belts and buckles, but he too had to fumble around with them before managing to understand how they worked.

“Weren’t we supposed to be the smartest cadets?” James asked with a laugh.

“Oh, I bet we could dismantle and rebuild the car in the blink of an eye. They just never taught us how to buckle belts properly.”

Keith waited until they were on the road to ask where they were going.

“Do you trust me?” James asked teasingly.

“With my life.”

There was an intensity to Keith’s voice that had James glance at him in surprise. It was too dark in the car to see his expression however. The words hang heavy, the silence broken only by the purring of the engine. James didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what to make of such a declaration. He’d known it, instinctively, known that if Keith trusted him with Sven’s life it meant he trusted him with his own also. His alpha pride swelled at the knowledge that his omega trusted him. It went deeper than that, though, to a level he couldn’t explain.

He slowed the car when they reached the right intersection and swung left unto a less travelled road that meandered its way into the red desert. The last lampposts remained behind them, the way illuminated only by the car’s headlights. Sven slept soundly, apparently unperturbed by bumps the car encountered.

Keith narrowed his eyes, trying to peer into the murky darkness. James didn’t know whether he would recognize the path; it had been destroyed during the invasion and then rebuilt differently later on. Either way he didn’t ask questions. The relaxed lines of his body indicated trust.

They rode for another fifteen minutes, leaving behind them both the Garrison and the town. In the rear-view mirror, they appeared only as domes of light on the dark horizon. It was utterly silent here. Keith had rolled down the window. The breeze that wafted in smelled of the dry sand of the desert. It smelled like _him_ , although less sharp.

Finally, he veered off the road onto a track of hard-packed earth. There were no signs so James counted to one hundred before stopping. Keith threw him a toothy grin, looking game. They both glanced at a sleeping Sven before stepping out of the car.

In front of them was a canyon. The dirt track beside it was used by the Garrison to train the new pilots. Keith recognized it immediately. He’d been getting ready to fly his own craft by the time he got booted from the Garrison, so he’d been spending a lot of time here with his fellow cadets.

Above them, the cloudless sky appeared to stretch to infinity. Millions of stars shone coldly, uncaring for the two lone figures that admired them.

Keith leaned on the bonnet of the car, craning his neck towards the vast expanse of the universe. Although it held no more mystery for him, he still looked fascinated. The cool light of the rising moon fell in his face, turning his eyes into pool of dark purples. His lips were stretched into a small, wistful smile.

“Remember our time here?” James asked, settling beside him. They were close enough that their arms were pressed together.

“Yeah. I was so excited to fly for the first time.” He grinned. “I was scared out of my wits. I was so nervous I wanted to puke.”

James chuckled. “I _did_ puke. I was steady afterward but damn, just before I left my room I emptied the content of my stomach in my bin.”

“Shiro told me he vomited too before his first flight. He said it was a sign of good sense. You always had more good sense than me.”

“I know,” James said, because this was true. “But good sense can only take you so far. You had guts, Keith, and now I see how useful it can be.”

Keith hummed. He leaned closer until James wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Together, they watched the stars that appeared so distant yet were close enough to reach in the blink of an eye.

“How am I doing so far on that date?” James asked.

Keith waved his hand in a so-so motion. “Meh.”

“Damn, I knew I should have brought you flowers.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, I don’t care about stupid flowers. You won me over the second you let me mess your hair up.”

“What!”

Keith laughed, sounding carefree and young and happy. He turned, tugging James by the front of his shirt. “Stop asking stupid questions and kiss me, Griffin.”

“Your wish is my command, Kogane.”


	24. Epilogue

Two months later found James in a steady but long-distance relationship. Of course Keith had to leave, had to go back to his obligations, to his life and to his job. It had hurt a little at first, but he understood. He understood duty. They talked every day, either sending texts or video chatting. Although it was enough for the moment, James knew this wouldn’t last. Every morning he woke up to an empty bed was agony. Keith belonged there, belonged by his side. He could tell Keith found it difficult too, though he’d never put it into so many words. It showed in the eagerness on his face when the call connected. James read it through the increasing quantity of texts Keith sent him.

Keith had said they’d talk when he visited next month. For his heat.

For some reason, James doubted there’d be much talking once the heat began. Nevertheless, it was good to have something to look forward to. Perhaps Keith would decide to extend his stay. Perhaps a week could turn into a fortnight, into a month.

So James waited and pushed everything he had in his job. Commander Iverson finally, _finally_ asked for a formal report on what had happened on Mizipra. He was made to stand in front of every member of the Voltron Coalition, ambassadors from Mizipra included. Lance Álvarez was also present for New Altea, testifying on how the hoktril had been stolen from his castle’s vaults. Assmiya and Assilsa were made to tell what they’d known of the situation. Both of them had been terrified, afraid to be blamed for not interceding on the slaves’ behalf sooner. Since Keith was busy on a mission with the Blade, he sent Ezor and Zethrid in his stead. Finally, Captain Shirogane and Lieutenant Miller had their turn at the pulpit, recounting in vivid details what had happened during their stay.

There were hours of deliberation afterwards. James awaited the verdict nervously with the others, fidgeting around like it was his own fate that would be decided.

The final decision went as everybody had predicted: Mizipra would immediately release any slave they had under the hoktril’s influence. They would pay a hefty fine as well as reparations to those they had wronged. A new leadership would be assigned to them by the Coalition in due time.

A slap on the wrist, nothing more. Though James had expected it, it still rankled. In the end however, they had to be practical; Mizipra fed half the Coalition’s planets. Would it be fair for others to starve just to punish the Miziprans? They would be put under heavy surveillance, their freedom nearly revoked. It had to be enough.

Captain Shirogane seemed fine with this conclusion. He didn’t argue, didn’t demand retribution. Hell, he even refused to be handed his fair share of the reparations. He didn’t need money, he said with a smile.

Lieutenant Miller rolled his eyes and told him that they could have used the money for the wedding.

And that was how everybody learned that the captain and the lieutenant were getting married.

James envied them a little. Keith and he had been together for only a couple of months, yet James already dreamed of a big wedding followed by a couple of children. Keith had joked that he wanted that only because everybody around them was getting married; Shirogane and Miller, Alex and his new boyfriend, Pidge and her girlfriend. Hell, even Zethrid and Ezor were talking of a marriage, though the Galran version of it was so different from the human one that James had absolutely no idea what it entailed.

It sounded very… public. Like getting undressed in public. He didn’t want to think about it.

He didn’t tell his parents about Keith despite wanting to. He didn’t want them to ruin his happiness by pointing out the very true fact that long-distance relationships rarely worked out. There were days when James felt like a child hiding under his blankets pretending the real world didn’t exist.

Keith had told him he had an idea that might help the both of them in the future, but he’d been mysterious about it. James supposed they’d talk about it the next time they saw each other.

In the meantime, they video chatted, more often than not getting naked after a while. When things didn’t get heated, James got the chance to talk to Sven a little. He’d grown attached to the boy and missed him. Sven remembered the game they’d started about James learning Galra, so every time they talked he’d make him repeat Galran words. Pretty soon James learned that Keith’s second language wasn’t that difficult to learn, especially since he could practice either with Ina or with the Galran aspiring pilots he had under his wing.

He was seated in the officers’ lounge with Ina, Ryan, and Nadia when the room’s holoscreen came to life. Important calls were patched through this way as well as public announcements, or when the recipient of the call couldn’t be reached.

Lieutenant Miller’s face appeared, looking slightly strained. “ _Call for Lieutenant Griffin. It’s important_.”

James’ heart squeezed in his chest. “What is it?” he asked, getting to his feet.

Around him, the room faded to nothing. The noise died down. He could feel a dozen pairs of eyes boring into his back. Nobody would think of calling him through the Garrison’s channels except for Keith. Everybody else, even his parents, always called him on his phone no matter the urgency. The Garrison channels were used only on military matters. Had something happened to Keith? Was he in trouble?

“ _I believe it’s better if I patch you through, lieutenant._ ”

Was that… an apology in Lieutenant Miller’s voice? Shit, what was going on?

The image changed on the screen. The colours were slightly off, blending into each other a little. The feed connected with difficulty. The statics on the screen was not enough to mask Keith’s face however.

Keith’s _enraged_ face. His teeth were gritted, his cheeks were chalky, his eyes had that yellow tinge to them that indicated a strong emotion. Had he been a cat, his hair would be standing on head.

“ _Griffin!”_ he barked, startling the whole room. “ _Griffin, you fucker! You bloody liar! You lied to me! I’m going to fucking kill you!_ ”

“W-what?” James spluttered. “K-Keith, kitten, what—“

“ _Don’t call me that! You lied to me and I’m going to strangle you! Do you have any idea how much trouble I’m in right now?! Eh? No you don’t! You stupid alpha who only thinks with his stupid dick!_ ” Keith fumbled in his rage. He pushed an object towards the camera. “ _How do you explain this?!_ ”

Keith was shaking so badly that James had no idea of what he was trying to show him. He stared, aghast, trying to understand what was happening. He was dimly aware that there were people witnessing this. He could hear them murmur at the edge of his awareness.

He focused on the screen, knowing Keith would get angrier if he got ignored. There was a piece of pale plastic in his hand about the length of a pencil. The image was too blurry for him to discern any detail, though there seemed to be writings on it he couldn’t make out.

Someone gasped behind him.

“Kitten, what—”

“ _I’m fucking_ pregnant _, James! How is that fucking possible?! You said you couldn’t—Don’t you dare faint on me! Kinkade, grab him before he falls because I’ll be the one bashing his skull in, not the floor!_ ”

Ryan’s big hand closed on his shoulder, guided him down on the nearest chair.

“Sit down, daddy,” his friend said, a smile in his voice.

James looked at Keith’s livid face. Looked at the pregnancy test in his hand.

He burst into happy tears.

 

 

THE END

**Author's Note:**

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